brb suicide
by Kitteh and Neo
Summary: A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your typical emo kid in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous. ZADR AU
1. Chapter 1

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 01

Away from the city and away from the noises of annoying everyday life, many miles down, sat the Middle Skool, which most of the teens attended or just generally skipped. It was an okay building that still needed some work, but no one wanted to waste the time and money on it. Everyday inside the brick building was the same. Many a personality walked the halls, to and from classes, never really giving any other one person a glance. Not unless you were in with the popular crowd did you really get noticed.

It was a different day though, and a horribly different routine. There was gossip, but not the same gossip as usual. Rumors spread about a new student being transferred. It was news that shouldn't have mattered, but in such a small place it was a rare event.

One person had already heard enough of it all.

Outside the office sat a lanky boy in a horrendously short, long sleeved shirt and low, hip hugging pants, and for the most part he was pretty much ignoring the rest of the world around him. He knew about the new student, he knew far too well because he had been unlucky enough to be chosen to show the new kid around. The job wasn't something that needed to be on his to do list, but the teacher had gotten fed up with him listening to his headphones in class and felt it was better than having to scream lessons to him.

"I hate this place..." With those words, Dib put his headphones back in place, music blaring, and opened the notebook in his lap.

It was then that lithe arms of a pink and black persuasion took it in their own invitation to slip themselves around the boy's neck, the rest of the person draping over him as if they were an intimate familiar.

"'I cry for you. Tears of sin. Broken hearted. I stand alone'" Their husky, yet pitched voice read from the page that the other wrote upon with mock drama. Soon to follow was a completely uninterested, thoughtful noise. "Wow. That's... -that's pure dookie. I've never read something so bad. Was that supposed to be moving? Because all that it moved was my breakfast straight into my mouth." They promptly made gagging noises, a thin, striped tongue lolling out.

Headphones were yanked down so quickly that it was amazing Dib hadn't taken his own ears off in the action. He had been able to catch nearly all of what the other person said, and it had him closing the notebook with a loud noise. The words weren't the only thing that bothered him though; it was the close embrace of the other body as well. With a quick jerk and an annoyed sound, Dib sat up from the bench and turned to face whoever had touched him. "No one asked you..." His words died slowly as he stared at the other across from him.

Green was the first obscure quality that stood out; green skin on a widely grinning face. But it was the pink that truly over whelmed the senses of looking at the other; pink shirt, pink and black striped mini skirt and sleeves, pink eyes, pink eye makeup, pink buckles on boots that buckled _all _ the way up. But what was truly pointless was the black suspenders that hung uselessly from their hips. And with that rather slinky way of which they held themselves, arms crossed and cocky, they had 'androgyny' written all over them in jerky, cursive writing.

"I asked me." Their sharp grin grew wider still. "And that's all that counts."

All that crossed over Dib's face was a scowl, but it was just as quickly wiped away for a small pout. His eyes roamed over the figure for a few seconds. It definitely wasn't anyone he had ever seen in the skool before, which could only mean this was the transfer student.

Just his luck.

Without a word, Dib walked back to the bench and leaned down to pick up his bag, shoving his notebook back inside before he slung it over his shoulder. He didn't even bother turning his music off, and instead turned it up even higher so he could keep the headphones around his neck. "Come on, I have to show you around." He stood back up only to face the other. "Try not to get lost and stay with me. I didn't want to do this in the first place."

"My, my, you are a charmer." The new student clacked their tongue. "Do you treat all your new comers with such hospitality? Or am I a glorious exception?" They cackled to themselves, moving to follow Dib on his grand tour. "By the way," the new student leaned nearer to Dib and splayed three sharp fingers and a thumb in the taller boy's direction "I get lost easy so, would you hold my hand?" There was that rigid grin again.

"Sorry, I'm not a fan of physical contact. If you get lost, you'll just have to hope someone finds you." Dib didn't even glance back at the other as he spoke. His eyes stayed forward as his feet led him through the hall. "Besides, I'm not helping you because I want to be nice to you; I'm helping you because I got in trouble." He shifted the bag around on his shoulder before pointing a hand out towards a stairwell that they were nearing on the right. "Those are stairs. You go up and down them."

The student looked to the stairs dryly. "Noted." Though it was something else that caught their attention far more than the righteous up and down of stairs. With a curious tilt of head, their right eye was veiled in dark hair, but that didn't stop the devious look that Dib was unfortunate not to see. "So. Then. What's the point of this uniform if you don't like touch?" A claw drew up Dib's front, from the boy's belly button to the extreme high cut of the bottom hem of the other's shirt (that would make any parent cry, and nuns implode on sight).

Dib had stopped in his tracks at the sudden touch and shot his hand out to grab the other's wrist. "Stop it." He looked down at their hands and immediately let go with a disgusted expression on his face. His own hand moved down to rub at his stomach, his fingers just barely catching on his piercing. "Just because I wear something doesn't mean I want people touching me. It's their perverted problem if they get the wrong signal, not mine." He dropped his hand back down and started walking again. "So far I haven't had to deal with it. You're the only one that has never learned of personal space, it seems."

But the new student didn't seem to catch the last part (or any of it for that matter) for they were now face to face with Dib's stomach, their lithe frame bent over, peering at it with much too much interest. "I like this." They poked at the beaded ring on Dib's belly button. "What's it do? Or is it doing it already? It should tell the time. Oh- or maybe some kind of dooms day laser that you fire forth when you're cheesed." They blinked and soon a sly lazy look crossed their face. "I want to lick it." they commented idly.

Dib had to stop again quite quickly, or else he would have toppled head first over the other body. The sudden poke to his piercing had his stomach clenching while the other's words had him throwing both his hands over the small piece of metal, as if to protect it. "What's wrong with you?" Dib realized that was probably one of the stupidest questions he could have asked as soon as it left his mouth. "Where could you possibly be from that you've never seen piercings?" As he spoke the last question, he back stepped as if at any moment the strange green teenager would actually lick him.

The new student raised their head to peer up at Dib, new grinning excitement on their face. "Hey! MORE!" They pointed and stood up. "Oh! Must touch!" They reached up to try and touch the piercings on Dib's ears, going on tip toes to bridge the height. "Gimmie gimmie."

"No!" Dib moved his hands up as quick as he could to swat the other's away from his ears. "Don't touch me. That means any part of me." He stepped back a bit more from the other teen and tried his best to glare, but it didn't look very menacing. "Now I can see why you had to transfer. Everyone you knew probably got sick of you and sent you here." He fidgeted with his ears just a bit before letting his hands fall back down to his sides. "You're really annoying."

Well, that had the new student's eyes snapping wide, pausing in mid grab. They stepped back and lowered their hands with a returning glare. "Yea?" They scowled further. "Yea, well, you're just jealous. Jealous of the amazing that is Zim." They buffed their fingers against their chest before promptly setting their hands on their hips, cocky once more. "At least _my _ organs are warm." They stood straight and proud at the fact their shirt went all the way down to their hips.

Dib just stared at the other with a very unimpressed expression on his face. "Well, _Zim_, warm organs or whatever, could you kindly stop your fascination with the shiny things on my body and keep following me?" He finally started walking again, not even brushing past Zim. "Who knows what the teacher will do if I don't show the precious new student every nook and cranny of the skool." He moved a hand up to bite at one painted nail, just so he could hide a horrible grin. "Or I could just lock you in a closet and hope no one finds you."

Zim snorted, despite having no visible nose on his face. "I'd get out. I'm quite proficient in coming out of the closet." He crossed his thin arms and firmly nodded, his dark hair bouncing slightly in the action. "Call it a skill."

Without stopping, Dib turned his head back to look at Zim with a raised brow. "You...?" He stopped short of asking the question and instead let it hang in the air. He turned his attention back to the floor in front of his feet. "Whatever, I don't care. Stupid question anyway." It wasn't long before he stopped walking just to stand in front of a door that had only a small view of what was inside. For a few seconds, he moved his eyes around the room before letting out a small sigh. "Good, no one is in." He turned his eyes back to Zim, the annoyance back in his expression. "This is the computer lab. Rarely there are classes in here or the usual nerd or two, and today seems to be one of the times they took a break." He moved his eyes around the hall. "You can't use it unless you have a pass, but sometimes I'll be able to come in here if there's no one in sight. This or the library."

Zim took one glance inside and immediately he looked unimpressed with what he saw. "Pathetic. Your technology is about as exciting as a cardboard box filled with useless." He waved a dismissive hand in the computer room's direction. He perked some towards Dib, catching the other's gaze. "Library, you say?" That grin was returning. "Something of interest in the library?"

Dib turned his eyes back to Zim at the other teen's words. He was about to ask what he meant, but the question had him stopping and answering instead. "Oh, well nothing really. It's just quiet." He gave a small shrug of his shoulders while moving away from the door. "I go there to write. Although, I guess if you like to read you could be amazed by the millions of books they have. Some of them aren't all that bad." He stopped in his tracks again just so he could look back at the other with somewhat of a smirk. "You do know what a library looks like right?"

Zim let his thin tongue hang from his lips as he gave the other a bland look. "Books. An information center. Yes, yes, I am familiar with libraries. Rows upon rows of thin, dried tree slices with useless drivel on everyone. Abandoned, dim, secluded areas where you can do _anything_ and not be found." He blinked and his grin became just that much more crooked. "Yes, I can see why _you_ would like it. And it's _writing_ you do there? So that's what the monkeys of this planet call it." He laughed sharply.

Dib glared at the other as a horrible blush replaced the smirk that had been on his face. "So, you have a dirty mind on top of being incredibly annoying? I'm glad I won't be hanging around you all the time." He tilted his head and tried to take his mind off of what Zim said, while instead focusing on other things. "You have a really weird way of talking about things, you know that? Where are you from?" He tried his best not to sound interested, but the curiosity was obviously there.

"Oh, it definitely isn't walking distance." The new student laughed loudly.

Dib only rolled his eyes at that while turning around to continue walking. He didn't even wait to see if Zim would follow, although he did speak up. "So, what, you're like from another country?" One of his hands moved down to press a button on the CD player at his side. The music that had been background noise finally stopped, leaving silence as he went on. "If so, then does that mean you can speak another language?"

Zim stuck out his tongue and raspberried. "This language is bad enough as it is, why would I want to know another?" He followed beside Dib, closing one eye (not that it could be seen under hair) and eyed him with the other. Suddenly pleased with what he saw, Zim was once again grinning to himself. "So. Are you pierced _everywhere_?" he asked slyly, narrowing his eyes.

Dib immediately turned his attention to Zim. As fast as he had snapped his head to the other teen, it would have been amazing that he didn't snap his neck. "T-That's n-none of your business." He quickly turned his eyes back to the floor, no longer having the courage to look at Zim. Suddenly he wished for the noise of his music again.

The new student's brows rose, then he was cackling into hand at the other's embarrassment. "Hilarious." He looked back at Dib from the corner of his eyes. "How does one acquire these piercings? Where do I need to go? Wait." He pointed. "Zim could probably do a better job himself. Yes. Less chance of infection. With your grubby, rusted tools." Zim shuddered, clacking his teeth. "Who knows how barbaric a ritual it is when you stab your loops through your flesh." There was that disgusted gagging noise again.

"It's not safe to do it yourself, ya know." Dib still refused to look at the other teen, even as he spoke. His embarrassment over earlier was still quite high. "You just have to go to some place you know is safe. I went to a small shop in the city. A few people in skool went there, so I checked it out one day." He gave a sigh as he finally tried to calm himself down. "It hurts at first, but you get used to it after the second or third one. Plus, it all depends where you get yourself pierced." Dib blinked his eyes and shot a glare at Zim. "Why am I talking to you about this like I care?" He scoffed and looked ahead again. "Do what you want."

Zim blinked and was soon all teeth in his grin and he followed Dib again. "Well I have FAR more superior instruments at home for piercing flesh than any store _here_ could offer." He made a thoughtful sound as he looked Dib over, top to bottom. Lagging a step or two behind, he thoroughly drew his eyes along Dib's back and marched a few quick steps to look over Dib's front next. "Hey stabby-face, say 'ahhh'." Zim opened his mouth in gesture and stuck out his tongue.

Dib slowed to a stop in front of Zim and blinked his eyes at the shorter teen. He averted his eyes left and right for a few moments hesitant to do what the other told him to do. It took him awhile, but he finally did as Zim wanted and stuck out his tongue with a loud 'aaah' noise. The small silver barbell in his tongue clacked against his teeth for just a split second as he stuck it out. He let his eyes fall back down on the other and tried to speak, but they were muffled words that came out, too incoherent to mean anything.

Zim's eyes grew perfectly round. And with no thought to personal space or touch, he reached up and plucked the tip of Dib's tongue with the tips of his pointed fingers and pulled it down, raising on tip toes once more to get a closer look. He made awed noises. Up Zim's eyes flicked to Dib, definitely impressed in catty way. "So you _are_ pierced _everywhere_." He licked his tongue over the peculiar ridge of his own teeth, thoughtful again. "What's it feel like?" Without a second thought, Zim flicked his striped tongue against the piercing. "Ow!" Zim sharply jerked back, clapping a hand over his mouth.

When Zim jerked back, so did Dib, but for a completely different reason. He stared wide eyed at the other for several moments, oblivious to Zim's pain. He didn't even realize he still had his tongue sticking out, until he finally spoke out as he shouted at the other teen. "What's wrong with you!" His eyes narrowed behind his thick glasses. "I told you I hate being touched how many times now? And then you go and pull a stunt like that? If I didn't have to show you around, I'd leave you in the boiler room to rot!"

Zim narrowed his eyes and glared hard back at Dib. He relented his hands from his mouth and furiously wiped at his own tongue, making spittle noises. "You stung me." he spoke pointedly. Zim then eyed Dib, and really stared scrutinizingly at the boy, accusingly at the same time.

"Stung you?" The glare Dib was sending Zim's way left and was replaced by a confused expression. "I did no such thing. All you did was lick my piercing. That in no way can involve stinging." A frustrated sound came from him at the way Zim was looking at him. "Whatever, you probably got your tongue caught under it or something. You do seem stupid enough to do something like that." He started walking again. "Maybe next time you'll listen to me."

There was a low growl behind Dib and soon the quick stomping march of boots as Zim caught up with him. A furious slap struck itself across Dib's cheek. "You're a poor excuse for an ambassador!" Zim then marched on ahead. "I shall note your higher ups just how poor a job you did! Sting Zim with your tongue will you! HA!"

"Ohhh." An idle student in the hall commented. "Pwned. Right in the face by that girl."

"Lovers spat." Another student laughed and pointed.

Dib stopped just so he could raise a hand to his cheek. The sudden slap had surprised him. He didn't expect such a hard hit to come from such a short, skinny person. The shouts got his attention and he looked around at the people that had spoken in the hall. A scowl came to his face. So much for nearly being invisible. Without even a word spoken to the other people, he chased after Zim, catching with the stomping teen up rather quickly. He didn't give the other a warning before he grabbed a striped elbow in his grasp and pulled Zim down the hall. He didn't let up until they were near another door, which he didn't seem to mind kicking open. Thankfully, no one was inside at the moment, and he quickly let go of Zim's arm and used his free hand to slam the door closed. "You are not making my time here any easier."

Zim glared something fierce in Dib's direction as he rubbed his poor abused elbow. He hugged his arm close a moment as he back stepped away from the other until his back pack clunked against the wall; which was only just a few steps. Still, Zim eyed Dib before he tore his gaze away as if he were bored with the other, and took idle interest in looking to where they ended up. "It's not my fault you're incompetent."

Dib opened his mouth as if he were about to say something in return, but stopped himself and shook his head instead. His own eyes moved around the small classroom he had brought them to. There were only a few desks and the that posters hung on the wall mostly showed cheesy teamwork situations. "Well, this class won't be starting for awhile. Since you decided to once again lay your hands on me, we might as well hang out here until things cool off outside." With those words he walked to one of the desks and sat down while setting his back pack on the floor next to him. He moved his eyes back to Zim and raised a brow. "You always slap people over stupid things?"

Zim scoffed and dropped his arms back down, only to re-cross them, a slinky curve in his posture as he looked at Dib. "I dunno, you always do stupid things?" he shot right back.

Dib stared at the other for a bit, refusing to answer the question. Finally, he shrugged his shoulders and leaned down to mess with his back pack. It took him a few tries, but he was able to tug his notebook loose and opened it to whatever page was free while grabbing the pencil from the binder. "Well, you must want to transfer again pretty quick. If you're seen doing that again, you won't be the most talked about student anymore. You'll just be out of here." He started moving the pencil across the paper. "The teachers here aren't very strict, but they still despise fights."

Zim turned to the window in the door to peer outside. The crowds outside had grown to gossip, hungry for any new piece of adventure to build rumors upon; anything exciting to swallow, regurgitate, and eat again. It had Zim making a sour face and turning back around to leave the sight. Without much say, there was that green face peering over Dib's shoulder once more. "'Kill me softly. Kill me deeply. Pierce the flesh. 'Till you pierce the bone.'" Zim read off once more. He instantly let out a loud laugh, whacking Dib's back an amusement as he stood back up. "I think I'm going to throw up!" He held his stomach as he continued his hilarious laughter, almost falling down.

Dib bowed his head a bit, and his hand was in danger of breaking his pencil at any moment. He allowed Zim to have his fun before he finally turned his head to glare at him. "Can you mind your own business?" The glare left his face, and the tiniest sad expression replaced it as he looked back down at his notebook. He ran his pencil over the words on the page before a scowl came over his face and he scribbled out each word that had been there.

Zim continued to laugh even as he plunked down to sit on the table of a desk beside Dib. He crossed one lithe leg over the other as he leaned back on his hands. "Your pathetic attempts to be deep and profound both sicken and amuse me. Are there more like you, or are you a unique mutt in this inbred gene pool?" He idly kicked his draped foot.

Dib continued to stare down at the scribbled mess he had made for a few more minutes. "Have you looked in a mirror lately?" The words came out harsh and bitter. Not once did Dib look Zim's way after they were said. Instead, he tried to turn what was on the paper into some strange doodle.

"Yes." Zim answered simply and cheerfully despite Dib's curt tone. "And I liked it. I liked it a lot." He watched Dib an idle moment before he went on. "I think I shall pierce my tongue. Don't you think Zim would look good with his tongue pierced?" He slipped his pointed tongue out in gesture and curled it, licking around. He slipped it back in his mouth to speak "Though it seems rather pointless. What do you do with that metal thumb tack in your tongue? Does it taste good?"

Dib gave a quick glance to Zim out the corner of his eyes at the questions. Before he spoke though, he looked right back at his notebook and continued to doodle. "It doesn't taste like anything. Some people get them for certain reasons. I just got mine because I wanted it. It was something I wanted to have." He gave a shrug. "It was the third piercing I got." He moved his pencil in one long stroke before going on. "I don't think you would look good with one. Of course, I don't think you look good anyway, so it doesn't matter."

Zim's eyes snapped open at that. He scowled. His legs uncrossed and he landed them both on the floor to stand. He snatched Dib's book and whacked him upside the head with it, dropping it after. "You'll be the _first_ to go!" he sneered cryptically, and marched to go; gossipy mob outside or not.

Dib rubbed at the spot on his head which had received the abuse. He shot a glare towards Zim's retreating back while trying to figure out what the shorter boy meant. He let his eyes travel back down to his notebook and the page he had been drawing on. Only sketchy legs stared back at him and he quickly ripped the piece of paper out of the book and tossed it in the trash can that was only a few feet near the desk he sat in. "I should have stayed home today." With those words he got up, taking his book bag and notebook with him, just so he could follow after Zim.

The new kid had stormed out into the hall, pushing past people rather rudely, ignoring those who spat back rude words; though he would have loved to have actually spit back at them. He didn't need the Dib to show him around this stupid building called 'skool'. Its design was crude, inefficient, and worst of all, poorly maintained. One single shot in one well placed spot would have the building crashing down on the smelly herd of children cattle inside. That thought perked Zim some, and he quietly cackled to himself. Of course his joyous moment was quite ruined when he walked right smack into a very tall, very burly jock; his jersey didn't seem to want to hold all of him in. Zim went falling back as if he'd hit a wall, falling ungracefully to his butt with a squeak.

Dib had taken his time, moving down the hall, not paying much mind to the gossip that was still floating about. A few of the other kids actually paid attention to him for once, but just to talk about his sudden problems with his 'girlfriend.' It all had him feeling sick and wanting the day to end even more. His attention was caught by a flash of pink, and just as he was about to call Zim's name, that's when he realized what was about to happen. His eyes narrowed in annoyance and he walked up to the scene, but made sure to stay a safe distance. He didn't really want much to do with it.

Zim found himself face to face with the sneer of several missing teeth and the glare of one thick swollen black eye. But just as the jock was going to let loose a string of grunts and cusses that would make even a trucker blush, he caught proper sight of who just bumped into him. "D'oh, sorry there, girly."

Zim's eyes snapped comically wide, his green complexion went pale; he was far more afraid of this reaction than having the stuffing beat out of him.

The jock made a stupid laugh that would have made any 'normal' girl in the school giggle; Zim only grew more pale. When Zim caught exactly where the other's eyes were falling to, he gave a loud, insulted sound and promptly tugged down the hem of his skirt down to cover such a disgustingly lewd gaze; of course this caused the jock to grin wider.

"You're purdeh."

"… I think I really am going to throw up."

A few kids had stopped their mindless talking to watch the scene with interest. Some of the girls were looking on with obvious jealousy, while some kids were just watching for the sake of watching.

In that moment Dib felt like the best idea would have been to turn around and forget the short green teen. It was his own fault for walking off like that. Of course another part of his brain wouldn't allow it because then that just meant he would be in worse trouble if anything happened to the transfer student. With one last annoyed look at the growing crowd, Dib gave a harsh sigh before he stepped forward to stand next to the fallen Zim, a bland expression on his face as he spoke. "I didn't know you swung that way, Slug."

Of course when Dib addressed the jock by his name, all eyes immediately fell on the rather insane, now suicidal boy. Slug's expression of course turned from leering to that vicious sneer once more when he looked at Dib; no one like Dib ever talked to anyone like Slug.

Zim flailed and immediately squirmed over to latch onto one of Dib's long, thin legs. This, of course, settled even less well with Slug and the jock growled.

"Quick! Stabby-monkey, run! Run into the sunset!" Zim clawed his way up Dib's pants, half standing he used the boy as a human shield. "Use that stinger in your mouth to paralyze your enemy!"

Dib tried not to topple over as Zim practically climbed all over him. "Zim, would you please stop?" He had shot a look to the shorter teen behind him before turning his attention back to Slug. The cruel look he was getting from the jock almost had Dib stepping back. He had never once stepped up to one of the jocks, and he had never planned on it. Why he had suddenly gone so nuts, even he himself didn't know. "I think it's pretty obvious he's not interested in someone as illiterate and hard headed as you." Dib had to stop himself for a second and back track over what he said. He really seemed to have a death wish, and he prayed his end would be quick.

It was exactly Dib's words and sudden back bone that flicked the catalytic switch that made Slug ready to throw his fist straight into Dib's face. Well, it would have, had something not clicked right at the last minute. "He?"

Zim squeaked from behind Dib, peering past the boy. "Me?"

"You."  
"Um."  
"Boy?"

"Friend?" Zim threw the word out of no where. "Yes! Boy friend! He's my boyfriend! So-- you can't come near me! Stay away! Or, he'll, he'll-- shoot lasers from his belly hole!" Zim clawed threateningly at the air, leaving many a daft expression all around from what he'd said.

Dib's whole body went rigid and his eyes snapped wide open. His worries about Slug slamming his fist in his face were thrown out the window for a completely different worry. "W-What?" His eyes darted around at the crowd that was still there. Some of the kids seemed to be in as much shock as he was, while others were trying to hide laughter behind their hands. All Dib could do was stammer out nonsense as he turned his eyes back to Slug. He didn't even try to pull away from Zim. He was too busy trying to get his mind to work properly to worry about touch.

"Oh for the love of my Tallest." Zim yanked on what little there was of Dib's shirt, resorting to pulling on his belt too. "C'mon." he hissed "While all standing is drooling stupid." He grabbed the boy's wrist and yanked him back into the crowd. He broke into a run, pulling Dib along, not stopping to care where he was going or who they bulled over at the same time. Zim just figured that one hall had to lead another, and that was good enough for him. "Down here." He tugged Dib down a smaller hall and stopped, glancing back; no one was following. "Success!" He shot both his hands up, Dib's as well, in victory.

Dib had gone along as they ran, too out of it to pay attention. As soon as they stopped, he immediately yanked his hand free. He turned a hard glare to Zim and practically shouted at the other teen while rubbing his hand as if it were diseased. "Why did you say that! Why _would _ you say that!" He looked away from Zim just so he could start pacing back and forth in front of the other. "I can't believe this. I can only imagine how screwed up everything is going to be now. I was perfectly fine just being invisible, but no, now everyone is going to think I'm gay!"

Zim narrowed his eyes slightly, watching Dib move back and forth. His lips pulled back into a musing grin. "Going to write bad poetry about it now?"

Dib stopped his walking just to narrow his eyes on Zim. In one quick movement, he backed the shorter teen into the nearby wall with one hand pressed beside his head. His other hand moved up to point inches from Zim's face, and wagged a few times as he tried to come up with the words he wanted to say. It didn't take long for him to get fed up with himself, and move away just so he could turn his back on Zim with crossed arms. "I should have let Slug molest you."

Zim blinked his eyes back from being cross eyed from the pointing, and stared at Dib's back. He pressed his back further against the wall, resting his hands beside him so he could drag his claws against the texture. It didn't matter if Dib was looking or not, Zim knew the other could feel him grinning at his back. "You so are." There was a quiet sort of cackle from the new student. "Something like. Oh! Lemmie try: Dark desire of the dark, darkest, darky, darkness. I wish I was as awesome as Zim." A claw left its place from the wall and ran its pointed finger up the back of Dib's bare spine; it _really_ couldn't be helped.

Dib's hands clenched at his sides and he tried his best to stop the shiver that wanted to run through his body, but it was hard. Just as quick as before, he turned around to land both hands on either side of Zim's head, a hard expression on his face. "Stop touching me!" His eyes moved around the other's face before he finally pulled away just to place his headphones back on his ears. One hand dropped down to turn the volume back up and with one last glance to Zim, he turned and left the deserted hall.

Zim blinked his wide eyes several times. He clacked his claws together watching the boy go. "Wow." He slumped against the wall. "What a touchy pierced-belly."


	2. Chapter 2

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating **PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass backwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 02

It was much later in the day, an hour after lunch, that Dib had decided to cut classes and just sit out on the cement railing in the front of the skool. The teacher still thought he was leading around that good for nothing transfer student, so why should he even bother going back to class? They could keep thinking he was dragging the green kid around all they wanted, he didn't care.

Inside of the skool, there was still talk of what had happened earlier. Every now and then a few kids would come outside and stare at him as if he were some strange wonder. He tried to pay it no mind, but it was hard when he seemed to be the only reason the other kids were cutting classes. The door slammed for what had to have been the tenth time, letting another kid back inside. Dib gave out a harsh sigh and went back to the picture he was working on. It would have been easier if he hadn't of thrown the other piece away in that classroom, but what was done was done, and he had to commit to memory.

"You're pretty elusive, face-pierced." That familiar voice spoke up directly in front of Dib. "Like a naked mole-rat; sneaky and with a pink under belly." A green face peered as usual to what Dib was doing. "So, not only are we 'poetic', we're 'artistic' too." Zim tried to turn himself so he could see the upside down picture properly. "Perhaps you're better at this talent than the other." He tried to balance on one foot to peer at the drawing.

Dib quickly picked up the notebook in his lap just so he could hug it to his chest. His eyes moved up just a bit and locked onto the ones in front of him. "Yeah? Well, you're pretty nosy." He turned his eyes away and instead looked down to the ground below while still holding his notebook tightly. "What do you want anyway? I thought I was finally able to get rid of you."

"Well, for one," Zim pointed a claw towards the skool "you never finished showing me around. For two," he pointed two claws towards the skool "I'm not going in there alone with _'Slug'_ sludging around after me thinking I'm kind of prized female mate. For three.." three claws then pointed towards the skool. "Why is your hair piece pierced?" He jabbed a finger in the direction of the lock that stood up with the ring dangling from its middle. "If you paid monies for that, you're an idiot." He laughed slightly.

Dib gave a small pout at the laughter while allowing his arms to loosen up on the notebook at the same time. After a few moments though, his eyes hardened and he turned his gaze back to Zim. "I did it myself actually, so there." He dropped the notebook back down on his lap and turned his attention back to the drawing on the paper, running his pencil across the paper much like he had been before Zim interrupted him. "I figured you would be fine on your own. Besides, Slug knows you're a guy now, he shouldn't bother you. If he does, then oh well."

Zim crossed his arms, giving the other an unimpressed look. "Not only are you a poor tour guide, you're a neglectful boyfriend." He made a highly dramatic insulted noise, sticking his nose up in the air. "You're highly uninformative, useless, _and_ you're handicapped." He pointed to Dib's thick rimmed glasses. "You should be taken back to manufacturer for repair. Your biological creators shouldn't have settled for less. Really, they should have tried again. For something less moody and perhaps," Zim tapped his lips thoughtfully "maybe, something in a...-nice shade of blue."

Dib just barely raised his eyes over the rim of his glasses to look Zim's way, the hint of a smirk on his lips. "Yeah, well your's should have sent you back for something less pink and without the green tint." He let his eyes drop back down so he could once again concentrate on his drawing as he spoke. "I have no real reason to hang around you anyway, because I'm _not_ your boyfriend. Thanks to you, everyone thinks I have some rare disease. I feel like I'm in a display case." His eyes darted over to Zim for a few seconds, but went right back to his notebook just as quickly. "The skool isn't that hard to navigate through anyway. You don't need me."

Zim 'hmph'ed, but his good mood wasn't swayed. He sidled closer to the other. "You know, since you hate being touched so much..." His sharp fingers slid down his pink shirt and tugged up the bottom, slinking closer with his lithe green middle showing; his skirt hung low on his bony hips. "You can _always_ touch me." the boy offered with a sly grin.

Dib's head shot up just so that his eyes could stare straight at the exposed skin in front of his face. His mouth moved up and down for a few seconds while a tiny blush crossed over his face. As if just then realizing he was staring at what wasn't Zim's face, Dib quickly scooted away as far as he could on the small railing while dropping his notebook in the process. He turned narrowed eyes up at the other teen and tried to sound angry, even though there was still pink on his cheeks. "You're such a pervert."

Zim glanced down at his own stomach and narrowed his eyes back at the other. "How is that perverted?" He swayed his hips from side to side.

Dib quickly looked away from Zim, not really wanting to watch the other anymore. "Do you even listen to yourself talk sometimes?" He stuck out his tongue at the thoughts going through his head before continuing. "Saying you wanted to lick my piercing. Actually standing in the hall and licking my tongue. Touching me any chance you get." He moved his eyes back to Zim, but regretted it. "S-Saying I can touch you. It's not right, you know."

A wide grin was definitely there, waiting for Dib. "Oh, but I like it when it's 'wrong'. Wrong makes it oh-so-right. And that's what counts, right? Wrong. Right?" He quietly cackled and drew his free hand down his bare front, tracing insensible patterns _all_ the way down, his expression going incredibly and tactfully lazy.

Dib moved forward on the railing on hands and knees until he was once more in front of Zim. One of his hands moved out to snatch the shorter teen's own to pull it away from his stomach while he glared up at the green face. "People are gonna think you're weird if you keep doing that, more so than usual, I'm sure." He blinked his eyes and looked at his own hand, which still held Zim's. With a disgusted sound, he quickly let go and sat back away from the position he was in. "Y-Yeah...anyway. I'm sure you don't want anymore unwanted attention."

Zim blinked and smoothed the front of his shirt down before looking back to Dib curiously. His grin was wide once more. "It was _you_ who touched _me_ this time." He raised a hand and wiggled his claws. "Zim's hand no less." Zim 'tsk'ed and wagged a finger.

Dib had leaned down to pick up his fallen notebook, so when Zim spoke he barely gave the other a glance. "So? That doesn't mean I liked it." He brushed some dirt off a page before trying to get back to the certain one he had been working on. "You wanted help, right? I'm trying to show you how to be invisible to the society that this place has built itself upon." He stopped speaking a moment just so he could give a satisfied noise when he got back to the page he needed. He looked over what he had drawn so far before trying his best to go back to work while speaking up again. "Of course, the way you look, that would be a hard task to achieve."

Zim quirked his head. "I have yet to see such a uniform as yours, that shows so much skin, on any of the other students." he shot back. He flittered his fingers as he spoke. "Unless being invisible means showing more skin. In which the only logical choice is-- NAKEDNESS!" He threw out his arms in victory at his epiphany. "Nakedness is the ultimate invisibleness." Zim rubbed his hands together, lowering his head mischievously. "So, shall we get naked?" He squiggled his brows.

Dib took a quick glance at the other once more, but there was no real annoyance on his face, much like the times before. "I'd hate to see what you would do to me if I said yes." He tilted his head to the side and seemed to study Zim for a few moments. His hand lightly tapped his pencil up and down on his notebook in idle boredom before he actually spoke up again. "I wasn't going to ask this before because I honestly didn't care, but what happened to your skin?"

"My skin?" Zim clapped either hand on his cheeks and felt around, but found nothing out of the ordinary. "If you don't care, why ask?" He gave Dib a wry look.

Dib narrowed his eyes, mostly in embarrassment, and quickly looked back down to the paper. "Well, it's not every day we get someone with green skin transferring here. I just thought I would ask." He gave a small shrug as he went about doodling some random thing in the corner of the page. "Although, there is that one kid who has those horrible mutated feet that glow in the dark." It was hard for him to keep the smirk off his face. "He gets some attention. Some of the ravers find it fun to hang him from lamps at their parties."

Zim pursed his lips, unsure if he should be insulted or amused. "Birth mark." He finally answered Dib's question. "It's a birth mark." He nodded, affirming himself.

Dib looked up once more just so he could lock eyes with Zim. He stared at the other teen for a few seconds before he gave a small shake of his head. "Wow, remind me never to go live where you came from." He dropped his pencil on the paper just so he could lean back on both his hands and keep his complete attention on Zim. "Is everyone born with horrible green birthmarks, or were you just the unlucky one?" He could help but tease the shorter boy.

"It's hereditary." Zim answered quickly, glancing to the side. "Passed down from parental maker to son, from son to dog, to some man in Norway. Very normal. I assure you." He looked back to Dib with a wide spread of lips. "Besides, where I'm from, everyone is this colour. Maybe YOU'RE the abnormal one!" He pointed an accusing finger at the other. "A disgusting piggy colour! Pah!"

Dib raised a brow and looked down at the finger pointed at him. "Your logic scares me." He raised a hand up off the railing to grab hold of the sharp finger. "Considering you are the only green kid here, I would say you are the abnormal one." His eyes moved down to the sudden touch he himself was allowing, and he gave a small scowl, but didn't pull away. "It's not nice to point at people either." That was when he finally let go and dropped his hand back down to wipe on his pants, as if it were diseased.

Zim blinked, raising his hand to look at the grabbed finger. In the end, he made a face and wiped it much the same on his own pants. "Zim will point at whoever he wants. And today, he's point at you," he pointed again towards Dib "you, you, you, you." He stabbed at the air each time, pointedly. "So nyah!" He immaturely stuck out his striped tongue.

"Watch it, or I'll grab your tongue next." It was an obvious lie, but Dib felt like saying it just to get under Zim's skin. He moved his hand back on the railing and kept his eyes on the other, before speaking up in a more serious tone. His eyes narrowed behind his glasses. "Why are you so outgoing? It's really annoying." A small scowl started to form on his face before he glanced to the side. "What could you possibly be so happy about? Especially since you just moved. Aren't you upset about having to leave your old home?"

"Gimmie!" Zim yanked the book free from Dib unrepentantly. "Zim wants to see what you've been writing while we've been talking." He turned it rightly over to have a look-see.

Inside the beaten up notebook, in the center of the page, was a sketchy pencil drawing of the shorter boy. The drawing was of when he had been sitting on the desk in the classroom. It was easy to tell the drawing was taken from memory, and was a bit sloppy.

Dib quickly sat up as soon as the notebook was stolen from him and gave a loud protest. "Hey, give it back!" He tried to reach for it and almost fell face first off the railing. As soon as he was able to gain his balance back, he moved off the railing a bit easier and tried to snatch the book back. "Quit looking through my things! You don't even like what I do, so give it back."

Zim quickly back tracked, looking the drawing over. "Ohh, so you're artsy-fartsy." He continued to back up, tugging the book each which way as the other tried to grab it from him. "You chose to draw Zim!" The boy was grinning once more, widely and pleased. "Though you didn't capture my greatness exactly great." He flipped it around to show Dib his own drawing. "You could do better." He hopped back a few steps from those grabbie hands of Dib's, grinning over the book.

Dib clenched his hands at his sides and shot Zim a glare, even though the blush from earlier was trying to come back across his face. "Yeah, well, I didn't want you to see it in the first place." he quickly moved a hand out to try and make another grab for the book, but missed completely. That fact baffled him since he was taller than Zim. "Come on Zim, this isn't funny! I don't like other people seeing my work."

"Why?" Zim nodded his head with his question. "Because it's really bad? Are you ashamed?" It then dawned on the green boy, and he turned walking away from Dib. "Oh! I must read more of the disgusting, ralph inducing, hand written bunk drawn here." He then sifted through the pages to read. "Oh! This one looks very stupid! 'My soul cries. Trapped in your eyes. Just one more kiss. Then I'll be missed.'"

Zim's words caused Dib's whole body to tense up, but when the other teen started to read his writing, it caused Dib to bow his head and stay silent. Without even waiting for Zim to say anything else after the words had been read, he immediately walked up to the shorter boy and snatched the book back. The force almost tore a few pages in the book. "I don't need your opinion, nor do I want it." With those words, he turned around to walk back to the railing and leaned down to pack the notebook in his back pack.

Zim watched dryly and clacked his empty claws together. "What? Can't take the truth, face-stabbery?" He pointed. "My opinion is excellent! And that poetry was pure butt extract." He nodded sagely. "The only good use for those pages is wipe. Well…" the boy faltered a moment. "Except that one of Zim. It's not so crap. Because Zim makes everything great!"

"I'll make sure to burn that page when I get home." Dib lifted his backpack once he stood up and sat back down on the railing with the pack slung over one shoulder. He kept his eyes averted away from Zim, and it was easy to tell he was still in a horrible mood. "You don't have to keep hanging around me. If you really want to see the rest of the skool, then go ahead. I personally hope Slug does whatever he wants to you while you're prancing around the halls. Then maybe I'll get some dignity back"

Zim narrowed his eyes, his hands tightly balling at his sides. Then, out of no where, he marched over to Dib and in one easy motion, swiped the boy's thick rimmed glasses. "I am taking these hostage." He stated in a hard tone, quickly back pedaled from grabbing distance. "Ready to listen to my ransom?" He bared his teeth, holding the glasses by the rim between pointer and thumb.

Dib had to blink a couple of times at his sudden lack of vision. Only then did he try his best to glare at the green and pink blob a few feet in front of him. He didn't even try to get up and grab the lenses, as he would only trip in the process. He really hated having horrible vision sometimes. "What do you want?"

Zim took the careful time and effort to click each arm of the glasses closed; the sound and action amusing him in his victory of the situation, the glare of course didn't bother him one bit. "First, I want you to escort me to the library. Second, I want you to give me any useful information pertaining to this city. And. Third," The teen's lips peeled back and his grin was nothing far from wicked. "I want to know the proper name of my boyfriend."

Dib almost choked at that last bit and quickly looked away at anything he could actually see. "My name is Dib, and I'm not your boyfriend. I already told you that part." He gave a loud frustrated noise under his breath, and stayed silent for a long time after. His eyes kept moving back and forth between the ground and the blob which was Zim. Finally, with a heavy sigh he gave in and spoke again. "Fine, on our way to the library I'll tell you whatever it is you want to know about the city. Now give me my glasses back."

Zim clicked his tongue and waved Dib's glasses chastisingly. "You must agree to ALL the terms before you get the object of desire." He smiled like a razor sharp salesman; not that Dib could see it. "Besides, I won't need your services forever. When you have lived out your purpose, I will dump you. And you can do… um... whatever it is your species does." That grin grew wider. "Yes?"

Dib opened his mouth, about to shout out a heavy protest, but instead closed it just as quickly and dropped his head in his hands. He shook his head from side to side and gave a low groan. "Why do you want me to act as your boyfriend so badly? This is going to be so aggravating for me if I agree to it. The other kids are already starting to talk. If it's made official even more, I would hate to see what happens." He dropped his hands and let them hang between his knees, his head following. "Why?"

"I need a body guard." Zim stated simply, opening the glasses to place them atop his head. "You did well against this 'Slug' creature, I could use that kind of usefulness in things later to come." He placed the glasses in front of his neck, giving a small 'ta-da' after. "It's win-win, trust Zim on this. You do stuff for me, I do stuff for you." He put the glasses on, holding them up to look through. "Ugh! You're so broken, it hurts my sight!" The boy went cross eyed, blinking several times. He pulled them off and quickly rubbed his eyes. So back atop his head he rested them. "While invisibility has its strong points," Zim's rigid grin spread across his face and his eyes narrowed knowingly "reputation does the work before you even lift a finger."

Dib lifted his head back up so he could try his best to look at Zim. "The reputation you want isn't the best one to have." He turned his head just so he could shoot a blind look to the skool's doors, although he ended up looking more at the windows. "I'm not really body guard material. What you saw in there was a fluke. What saved us was your mouth. At any time Slug could have punched me in the face and I would have been knocked out for I'm sure a year tops."

Zim shrugged out his hands and shook his head. "Everyone stupidly thinks Zim is a girl. Which is fine with me. I could care less if they thought I was a tricycle." He crossed his arms. "It works to either of our advantage: not only do I have idiot slugs under my control; but you would have the honor of having the new amazing girl as your," He twirled one hand in gesture "boyfriend-girlfriend-thing. Envy is a powerful tool for manipulation. Rising up the social ladder, you'd have many an advantage." Zim rested a hand out in gesture again. "Besides, you won't be obliged to any of those, uh, thingies, that relationships require: hugging, foreplay, footsies, definitely no kissing. I won't have that stinger tongue near me. Only when it is absolutely necessary to show that we are indeed," Zim wiggled his fingers "'together'." After he was done, Zim smiled wide pleasantly to sell himself; a crocodile could smile more sincerely.

With every last word Zim said, Dib just cringed more and more at the idea. He turned his eyes back down to the ground as he thought it all over, refusing to speak to Zim the entire time after the other teen was done. He kicked up some dirt below as he stalled and only after he was satisfied with the small hole he caused did he speak. "Fine, whatever, I'll do it. Just don't expect much out of it."

The fuzzy outline of dark glasses appeared in Dib's low line of vision, Zim was holding them out for him.

"That's a good Dib." the green boy grinned as he rewarded.

Dib lifted a hand up and snatched the glasses back. He easily placed them on his face and gave a relieved noise at being able to see once more and shot a glare at Zim. Without a word to the shorter boy though, he got up from the railing and made his way up the steps to the doors. Right when he was about to pull the door open was when he finally spoke. "How do you know now that I have my glasses back I won't dump you?" With that, he opened the door and went back inside, classes or not.

Zim let loud an aggravated noise. "YOU'RE MAKING A HORRIBLE BOYFRIEND!" And with that, he furiously ran his hands through his dark hair, yanking at it in his anger. He suddenly stopped and blinked through the veil of hair. "Hm! So- hair _does_ have a good use."


	3. Chapter 3

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass backwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 03

The clock in the library ticked on later and later as the minutes went by. Dib had made it his job of watching the small, red second hand move each time it went around in a full circle, all the way back to twelve. He had been standing by the front door of the library ever since the librarian had glared at him for even trying to turn on his CD player. That lady really scared him sometimes.  
Dib looked away from the clock just so he could chance a glance at the doors behind him. He had actually expected Zim to follow him. Of course it had been nice not to have to deal with the shorter boy's voice for awhile, but it was still annoying walking through the hall anyway. The event earlier still hadn't left the rumor channel, and was floating around worse than ever it seemed.  
With a final sigh and a shrug, Dib looked away from the door and walked away from it just so he could claim a table. "Guess he's not coming." He shook his head after the words left his mouth. "As if that was a bad thing. I'm a moron. Meeting him has killed some of my brain cells."

Despite being next to no one in the library, that didn't stop the rare few there to catch their eyes on Dib and immediately start whispering gossip to each other. The latest gossip was the best gossip, and Dib wasn't exactly a hard person to miss; all that mid-drift practically had the words 'talk about me' written all over it.

Dib caught a few words here and there, but it wasn't anything he particularly cared about. Though to say it didn't bug him would be a horrible lie. He thought about turning a nasty look at whoever he had heard that moment, but that always seemed to make them talk louder. Instead, he walked to the nearest empty table and dropped his bag on it, not wasting any time in taking his notebook out. He gave an annoyed noise at how beat up it was because of earlier, but didn't dwell on it too long, and was soon sitting down to write. Time went on, and all that was apparent to Dib was his deep thought and the sound of pencil on lined paper. It was as peaceful as one could get, even the whispering of other people droned out to nothing but easily ignored white noise.

"'Bloody hands. Memories of pain.'"_That_ familiar voice read in his ear. "'A needed touch.'" A sharp finger ran down Dib's ear to one of the piercings there, causing it to jingle. "'To keep me sane. So blind to love. Held by hate. Cure the fear. So wounds will heal.'" There was a lazy chuckle near Dib's ear. "See. You do like Zim." A green chin rested on Dib's shoulder.

Dib immediately slammed the notebook closed and kept his head down. He didn't try to pull away from the touch Zim had given him or the closeness of the other body much like he would have other times before. Instead, his eyes only moved around the nearly empty library. "That had nothing to do with you. Don't assume things." He dropped his eyes back down and let his fingers play with the edge of the notebook as if he were about to open it again. "I didn't think you were going to follow me."

"I didn't. I was the one originally wanting to go to the library, remember? Which you were suppose to escort me." Zim poked at the back of Dib's head for that. "Dib-liar-and-a-cheat. I should reclaim _my_ glasses for leaving Zim behind at the front of the skool." He poked at the other's glasses.

Dib moved his hand up to grab at Zim's wrist just so he could pull the other's hand away from his glasses. "Sorry..." The apology was barely spoken out loud, as if he were afraid someone else besides Zim would hear. He didn't let go of Zim's wrist right away and instead just lowered it down to the table. The grip loosened a bit though. "Why did you want to come here anyway? You didn't seem too interested in the place earlier, when we were talking about it."

The new student didn't speak right away, odd, considering he shot his mouth off any chance he got; relative to the conversation or not. Zim was too busy staring at his own hand now on the table; the apology received, he really didn't expect. Zim clacked a few fingers on the table's surface; yep, it was a table alright. "To read." The answer was obvious enough, albeit quiet now. "Research." His eyes wandered to a few students looking their way, now giggling to themselves at the scene before their eyes that cemented the new rumors. "To learn."

Dib could hear the giggling and his body tensed up. His fingers tightened around Zim's wrist before he realized what he was doing and he quickly let go. He pulled his hand back completely, just so he could pick up his notebook and pencil, and shove both back into his bag. "I guess we should get started then." He zipped up the zipper before finally pushing away from the table so he could stand. "I still have to tell you whatever it is you want to know about the city. I have to warn you though, it's not an interesting place."

Zim straightened in turn and he couldn't help but idly rub his wrist. "Anything you can tell me is good; history, population, maps, blue prints, defenses, offenses, the do's and don'ts, weaknesses and chemical makeup of your atmosphere and soil." He listed things off on claws, running out very quickly, only having eight fingers in total. "Oh-- and of course, your home address." He added quickly with a wide grin that couldn't fool anyone.

Dib blinked his eyes a few times while looking down at the other teen. It took him awhile to actually speak up with the question that was on his mind. "Why in the world would you need all of that information for?" He didn't even wait for Zim to answer. His hand moved out to grab the other's and it was easy to tell he was hesitant to do so. "Come on. There's a few books that tell the history of the place. What I can't tell you, you can look up." He ignored the sudden wide eyed stares from the nosy students, and instead just bowed his head as he dragged Zim along to the back of the library.

Zim couldn't help the winning evil grin and the wave to the people staring as he was pulled away; he didn't care what those peasants thought of him. He gripped Dib's hand back, just enough to claim, but not really enough to hold on. "It's for an essay. Yes. An entrance essay... About the city. I want to be very thorough."

As soon as Dib felt the sudden hold on his own hand he looked down at it, then back at Zim. In that moment he felt like pulling his hand back, but he had agreed to make things seem at least a bit sincere around the skool, so he was screwed. "Well, I doubt you need my address for your essay." He turned his eyes back ahead as he spoke. "So, I'm not going to give it to you." He took a turn down one of the aisles and finally let go of Zim's hand so he could search over the rows of books. "What's the most important thing on your list that you need to learn?"

Zim raised his hand to suck on his glove at the knuckle in thought. For a long while he was silent before he quickly spoke, much too loudly. "Your phone number then?"

Dib was about to shout 'no' back at Zim, but quiet laughter in the aisle across from them had him stopping before he even opened his mouth. He gritted his teeth once again, trying to ignore the noise as his eyes searched over the books. "I-I'll give you my address. It's better than having you call my house every hour of the night and waking up my dad." His eyes finally stopped moving and his hand rose up to grab at a large book on the shelf. Once he had a hold of it, he began to search through it. After flipping through several pages with a few annoyed sounds, he finally got to what he wanted and handed the book over to Zim. "Here, this has mostly what you need. The population, maps, and a rough outline of the history." Dib moved a hand up to fiddle with his ear as he spoke on. "I think the city was mostly brought up by some guy named Greazy who really loved chicken. Although I could be wrong, and that was just something I saw on TV the other day when I was hungry."

Zim barely glanced over the words on the book he held. He simply reached back into his back-pak and pulled out a bar that looked curiously like a cross between a fluorescent light and a rolly-ruler. With a click, it shone a pink light, which Zim slowly ran over on the first page, soon following the second. "Oh, the phone number wouldn't be for calling. It would be for tracing through to find your home address." He flicked a devious look Dib's way before looking back down to thumb the page over, running the light down it too. "Giving it of your own free will is much less painful. Saves me the work. Thank you."

Dib had been intrigued by the device Zim had suddenly brought forth out of his back-pak, and couldn't help but lean forward to get a closer look. Zim's words seemed to startle him for a moment, considering how focused he was on the light. A small smirk came over his face before he spoke. "I didn't know those two words were in your vocabulary." He looked back down and once again, seeming to pay more attention to the light than to Zim. "Hey, what's that thing?"

"Hmf. M? This old thing?" Zim flipped another page and ran it down as he had with the others. "It's a portable scanner. It, um, ya know, scans the image for my computer." He followed the last few pages before he clicked the light off and closed the book with the other hand, giving it back to Dib. "I require more information, Dibness. Retrieve it for me, will you."

Dib gave a small pout before grabbing the book back from Zim's hands. "Boyfriend doesn't translate to slave. I hope you know that, Zim." He returned the book to where it had been and began to search again. "The stuff you want on defense and things like that, well, you're going to have a hard time looking for that. It's not very common to find things like that around here. I mean, the city isn't just going to give out its personal information on how to protect itself."

"Boyfriend?" It was completely obvious Zim only heard what he wanted to hear out of everything that came out of Dib's mouth. He clapped his hands together and his wide grin matched his excited, wide eyes. "You accepted!" He made happy little noises as he then bounced around.

Dib quickly turned his eyes back to Zim and watched the shorter teen jump around. As much as he didn't even want to admit it to himself, it was amusing. Even the people staring at the strange scene didn't really bug him as much as before as he watched Zim. After a few moments though, he stepped away from the shelf so he could walk over to the hyper teen. In one quick movement, that he tried not to think too hard on, he wrapped his arms around Zim's shoulders from behind and tried to calm his bouncing. He moved his lips near the side of Zim's head and spoke quietly, making sure he was the only one that could hear. "It's only pretend, remember."

Zim immediately stilled. He closed one eye and tried to look at Dib the best he could, considering he was so near. "Y-yea." He pointed. "I knew that. Of course." He tapped his fingers together from either hand together; guilty, embarrassed, nervous or unsure; the gesture was hard to detour what for. But Zim found his eyes falling on the definite, more amused voices across the room; he had to wave at them and grin oh-so cattily from his position.

Dib turned his attention on the other students as well, and he couldn't help but let out a quiet groan before letting his head fall on Zim's shoulder. "I'm already hating this. So much unwanted attention." Just so his sudden change in mood wouldn't seem so bad, he gave the people what they wanted. As he lifted his head he nuzzled the side of Zim's face, which allowed his lips to linger on the teen's skin right before he pulled completely away. He dropped his arms and walked back to the shelf, giving a small shudder that couldn't be seen by anyone as he did.

Zim kept his eyes closed even after Dib left. Slowly, he opened them to narrow them Dib's way, blinking them open as he looked at the others' watching. Quietly, he rubbed his cheek where lips touched, there was no sting and he was thankful for it. "Zim will return to you, Dib-thing. Keep searching." That said, Zim wandered over to what had become a small gathering at the table of watchers; the green teen really had no inhibitions.

The three people that had taken to watching the scene played before them didn't even bat an eye when Zim started walking towards them. The only move they made to signify that they even noticed the teen was heading to them was a hushed silence. A thin girl with brown hair done back in a ponytail, who had seated herself on the desk, was the one that opened her mouth first when Zim finally stepped up. "You want something? Shouldn't you be necking with your boyfriend?"

Zim donned a wide toothed smile that was meant to be friendly; though to any the wiser, it was devious. "No. He's had enough for today. But yes, yes I would like something. I am Zim." He placed a hand on his chest addressingly, proud of it too. "I am the- uh, new student here. I wish to know who you pretty girls are. You seem adverse in the happenings of this skool, yes?"

The one girl gave him a look as if he were nuts, but in the end, she just shrugged her shoulders and began to introduce herself and the other two girls beside her. "I'm Alex. That's Jessica and that's Zita."

The two girls didn't even say as much of a hello. The pretty blonde girl Jessica had only turned her gaze away, finding something else much more interesting by now. Zita, a girl that didn't even seem to fit in with the two because of her purple hair, had found biting her nails more enjoyable.

"What _happenings_ are you going on about anyway?" Alex continued on when she looked back Zim's way. "I only know as much as they teach us here."

"Yes, well, unfortunately I have no such luck." Zim pressed his fingers together and tried to look forlorn; the action didn't last long. "I was wondering if you could tell me some information on that boy back there. Dib is his name." He pointed to the aforementioned boy. "You see, he is the one that approached me about this relationship; that I hear everyone is talking about." He looked back to Jessica. "And I wanted to know what others know before I... heh... committed." Zim smirked dryly at the last word. "Since I am new. As you know."

Jessica ended up turning her attention on Zim as Alex had found herself in a fit of giggles over what Zim had said, and couldn't find the words to talk. "Dib is..." Jessica twirled her hand around in the air for a bit as she tried to think over the right words.

"He's a weirdo. A complete loner." Zita had taken her chance to interrupt since Jessica was taking too long for her liking. "He's always carrying that stupid notebook around with him and never lets anyone else touch it." She moved a hand up and twirled it around her head. "The principal makes him go to the counselor's office once a month just to make sure he's not too depressed. I just think it's cause he's nuts." She dropped her hand after she was done speaking.

Alex finally got herself together and shook her head at what Zita said. "No, no. He's not nuts. He's just misunderstood." That only had her laughing again.

Zim laughed a little in his hand, his eyes darting to Dib before going back to the girls. "Completely insane is the pierced headed boy?" he mocked surprise as he clapped a hand to his cheek. "What sort of crazy things has he done?" He clasped his hands together and leaned in a little eagerly. "Any 'gossip'" his eyes widened for a second at the word "on him?" Girls of this species were a rather interesting breed, if not sadistic and amusing in their own right; a well of information... that giggled.

Zita almost squealed loudly at the fact Zim actually wanted to hear dirt on the boy that she thought was too weird and depressing. "I have some!" She grabbed the green teen by the arm and pulled him closer to the table so that she wouldn't have to speak up. "Last year when we were on a trip to go study wildlife, Dib was told to stay with the group for once. Usually he ends up going off on his own. Well, he did it again. When we found him, he was sitting on top of a cliff that connected to a small waterfall."

Jessica joined in the story, but as if she really had no interest in it at all. "The teacher kept shouting at him to come down, but the waterfall was too loud. The only way to get him down was if he came down himself. In the end he slipped and fell in the water. Everyone just stood there for a long time, staring until finally we got help."

Alex let out a groan at such a story and stretched her arms. "That's not gossip. Everyone knows that story. You want gossip, Zim? I heard those clothes are his sister's."

Zim bent over, leaning heavily on the desk considering he was yanked down, he crossed one lithe leg behind the other, clacking boot heel to toe. He had been laughing into one hand over Zita and Jessica's story about the water fall, when the information Alex told him had him stopping and blinking to look back over to Dib. "His sister? He has a sister?" What interesting news. "Dib is wearing his sister's clothes?" He laughed again, cackling into his claws. "How young is she? That would explain why the shirt is so illogically short." Zim mused. "Is there reasoning the Dib is so strange? Why he has secluded himself from his peers? And why he doesn't like touch and writes disgusting poetry?" Zim looked around from girl to girl for answers.

Each of the three girls looked at each other. Zita had let go of Zim's arm in favor of biting at one of her nails again. Finally, all of them turned their eyes back to Zim, but Alex was the one to speak up first. "Wow, you're really out of the social loop aren't you?"

"Think of it this way." Jessica spoke up once Alex was finished. She moved one of her hands up in the air above her head. "We are up here." She then moved her other hand down below, near her waist. "Dib is somewhere down there." She stared at Zim a moment before letting out a sigh and pulling her hands back. She gave a small shrug before speaking up again. "I really have no clue where you fit in. I'm sure we shouldn't be talking to you though. If you go out with Dib, you'll be just as low on the ladder."

Zita interrupted once more, just so she could move a hand out and poke at Zim, as if he were something shiny. "Yeah, what are you?" One of her sharp nails poked at the teen's back pack. "Everyone is talking about you. That gives you some credit. Although, it's not really anything good. Slug wants to get hold of you and Dib really bad." She suddenly pulled back as if she were burned and stared at Zim with wide terrified eyes. "Y-You aren't like him...are you? We don't need two of you floating around here!" She let her wide eyes drift to Dib, who was sitting on the library floor as he read, before she just as quickly looked back to Zim. Alex could be heard laughing on the table at Zita's sudden fear.

Zim rubbed the places he had been poked and blinked at Zita's sudden irrational fear. These girls were interesting to say the least; a symbiosis of three different personal characteristics. What amused Zim most was they were so close to finishing each other's sentences off. Though the mention of Slug had him frowning. "Am I like what? Crazy? Skilled in falling off things? Writing vile poetry?" He waved a hand. "No, no. I assure you, Zim is not any of these things. I am new and new to this- 'social looping' as you call it. The 'Slug'-monster and the low-laddered-Dib may be making a passes at me, but it is because of my superior fashion sense. I'm guessing all this accounts for something?" Zim blinked and pointed above where Jessica had stated the three girls were on the social ladder. "Is there anyone who is the highest of this ladder?"

That question had Alex's laughter dying down and a slow frown coming over her face. She didn't answer though, and instead turned a sour look in Jessica's direction.

Much like Zita had, Jessica turned her eyes Dib's way before completely averting her attention elsewhere in the library. She tried her best to keep her voice quiet as she spoke, making it seem as if she didn't want it to be heard for once. "Gaz, she's the head cheerleader."

"And Dib's sister!" Zita didn't care much about keeping her voice low and spoke right up. "You wanted to know about her, right? Well, she's a year younger than Dib. You wouldn't know they were related though. They don't ever speak to each other." Zita shook her head in a sad sort of way. "I didn't even realize they were related until their dad came and picked them both up after skool one day for some family thing."

Zim had nearly fallen off the table at Zita's sudden scream, the information packed quite a punch. "The-the Dib is siblings with the most highest of the social hierarchy in the entire skool?" He laughed, for he had no other real reaction. What a lucky find. He turned narrowed eyes in Dib's direction, but the boy hadn't moved since. "That is completely interesting. She is here." Zim raised a hand high up "And he is here." He lowered his hand back down before he rested his hand back on the table. "That is weird. He _is_ weird."

"Well, like Zita said, it's hard to tell they're even siblings. Most of the skool doesn't even know it. There are only a few, like us, that do." Alex had spoken up as she turned her attention back on Zim and suddenly looked a little bored with the whole conversation. "If you were to walk up to Gaz and ask her, she would deny it on the spot."

"Yeah, but don't do that, it's a stupid idea." Zita leaned back in her chair and rested her arms behind the back of it. "You know you're just as weird as Dib, considering you're going out with him. For being the new kid, you aren't making a good name for yourself to start with. Do you like being talked about this much?"

Zim stood back up from the table and straightened his clothing, smoothing his skirt out. His lips peeled back for a pleased grin. "I do." he answered animately. "You three have been very informative. Zim thanks you. It was good to meet you Zita, Alex, Jessica." He nodded each girl's way. "We must gossip again sometime." Zim gave another wave before he walked from the table and back over to Dib.

Dib's position hadn't changed much the whole time, although there were a few books piled up by his feet. At the moment though, he only had one thin book in his lap which he was skimming over as he kept his back against the shelf. Even when Zim came back over to him, he didn't seem to notice, too interested in what was on the pages of whatever he was looking at. Some nameless song was hummed low in his throat.

There was a tug-tug on Dib's pierced lock, the earring jingled some at the action. "Zim is back. Celebrate my return!" The green boy peered down at what Dib was looking at. "Did you retrieve more useful things for my _essay_?"

Dib immediately tensed up at the sudden touch to his hair, but tried his best to remind himself of things and relaxed. He had stopped humming just so he could open his mouth and answer the green teen near him. "I found some things, yeah." He kicked his foot out near the books by him and pointed the tip of his boot to one of the books in the middle. "I was wrong. They did have some stuff on the defense, offense...stuff like that. It's all in there." He turned his eyes back down to the book he was reading at the moment. "This one is just more history, a lot of stuff that wasn't in the other book I gave you."

"Excellent!" Zim snatched up the book at Dib's feet and the scanner from his back-pak once more. "You are a quite a useful tool." He was about to sit himself on the floor before he actually took a good look at it. Sticking his tongue out in disgust, Zim toed at it questionably. "Filthy." He huffed. So instead of sitting beside Dib, Zim invaded the boy's lap and sat quite easily there, moving the book the other was reading. "You are good furniture too. Here." Zim handed Dib the scanner. "Press that button and run it over the page. It's an easy task that even a smee--baby can do. But don't scan your face, you'll be permanently blind." He eyed Dib's glasses with a smirk. "More so." He then flipped through the book he had in his hands.

"H-Hey!" Dib tried to protest against the sudden body in his lap, but it was pretty useless, so instead he just gave in with a small scowl. His expression changed though, when the small device he had seen earlier was handed to him. He took it and looked at it, sending a small glare Zim's way for the teasing about his vision. He let his finger run across the button before actually pushing it, still amazed by the sudden light. He didn't dwell on it long though and started to run the device over each page he had been reading, while letting his head rest on Zim's shoulder. "What did you and the gossip queens talk about?"

"I have learned gossip is useful in finding out what is needed. Word from the mouth is often more useful than the written word, in any language." Zim grinned as he turned a page. He raised an idle hand and toyed with the other's hair; hair, so many uses. "Much fresher, and far more entertaining." The boy made a thoughtful sound but it didn't sound all that impressed. "The military in this city is standard, if you can call it standard. Looks low to minimal. Any moron could walk in and take control. A few blasts here." He pointed a sharp finger on the map on his page. "A tactical explosion here, here, here and here. And all you have to do is stroll in and conquer." Zim's two fingers walked across the page and pointed in finale. He gave a woe-ful sigh. "No challenge at all." He waved his hand limp wristed in his disappointment.

Dib had only given a small sound that he had even acknowledged what Zim said, as the other teen toyed with his hair. The that hand moved the device over the page suddenly moved slower, until Zim stopped. "You talk as if you know so much about this stuff." He turned a page just so he could continue on with his work. "Or at the most have studied some of this stuff before. I really don't think any of that matters in an essay. The teachers don't care about military weaknesses, do they?"

Zim stopped sucking on the knuckle of his glove. "You can never be too thorough, Dibness. Scan this book as well." He placed the book he was reading at Dib's side. "What about the planet? Are there books here that have similar information but for the whole dirt ball itself? I need to, um, compare this city with other cities on the entire world." He paused and glanced at Dib, a smirk of sorts on his lips. "I want to be _very_ thorough."

Dib nodded his head against Zim's shoulder in response to the question before actually speaking. "Yeah, there are books on most of the planets. Earth, Saturn, Pluto...uh...the rest." He shrugged his shoulders before moving the device along the other book. "They're somewhere around here. Probably farther down this row, since it's mainly for information. Reference and all that junk."

"The other planets are useless to me; all lifeless and dead." Zim took it in himself to toy with the pierced lock of hair, trying to figure how the piercing stayed in and how the lock of hair stayed up pointy. "I also need to know if there are more efficient libraries than this, with far better detail in their information. Oh!" He stopped toying with the lock of hair as something dawned on him "And I require a CD with defined words on it. Um. That thingy with Eh ta Zed. Dictionary! Yes. That's what I said. I said 'dictionary'." Zim drew his legs in and went back to toying with the other's lock of hair.

Dib tried to move his eyes up to see exactly what Zim was doing, but it was hard considering his position. "Well, there is a bigger library in the city that you could go to." He moved the free hand that wasn't holding the device up just so he could grab Zim's hand and bring it away from his hair. "As for the dictionary, there are a few here you can look at. Or you could wait to go to the other library." He brought their hands down to rest near Zim's legs, and kept hold even after.

"If the bigger library is better, I can wait." Zim's gaze cast down to his lowered hand, he couldn't help moving his fingers a little. "Escort Zim to this bigger library. Show me other useful things to know about this city." He looked back to Dib. "You said you would help Zim."

Dib narrowed his eyes at that and quickly pulled his hand away from the other's, just to rest it at his side. His attention went back to the book he had been scanning, and after a few more pages he switched the device off. "I said I would help you in skool. Outside of skool you're on your own." He handed the device back to Zim while trying to keep his voice as neutral as he could. "Outside of skool I want nothing to do with you."

Zim took the scanner between two claws and held Dib in his gaze for a moment. One eye narrowed as he watched the other before both eyes narrowed and a smug sort of expression crossed his face. "Want to know why word of mouth is such a useful tool?" He rested the hand that Dib had let go of and rested his own cheek in it, elbow rested on leg. "Because no matter where you are, 'dirt' is universal." Zim's teeth bared and his grin became just that much more shameful.

Dib's own narrowed gaze turned to a pout at the other's words. He turned his attention to the three girls, who were still watching them so intently, and gave out a low groan when the girl he knew as Alex gave a limp wristed wave his way. As soon as the giggling started, he quickly turned his eyes back to Zim and clunked his head back on the other teen's shoulder. "Fine, whatever. I'll take you to the library, just please let this all be over with soon."

Zim pat-patted Dib's cheek with his free hand. "That's a good Dib. Don't worry, I'll make this mission as quick and painless as I can. Zim is an expert, and he doesn't disappoint." That said he picked up the book he'd set down and began to scan the pages himself.

"It's just an essay." Dib had lifted his head and eyed the other teen curiously before laying his chin down on Zim's shoulder. "You're treating this whole thing like it was so much more. You shouldn't get so attached to just a small assignment. The teachers here don't really care about that kind of stuff." Without really thinking, Dib moved his arms around Zim's waist before going on. "Just write a few pages of nonsense and you're done. You're already in the skool, so who really cares?"

Zim glanced down a quick second at the arms around his waist, but gave it no more a thought as he continued to scan. "I failed to mention, Zim is quite the over achiever. Plus, extra research can always be used for reference later on, heh, 'future projects'." His lips quirked more.

"Hmm..." Dib raised a brow at what Zim said. "What could you possibly need all of this information for later on? Seems like such a waste." He shrugged his shoulders, not really caring for the answer and instead closed his eyes. "You know, you aren't so bad when you're not being annoying." He gave a small smirk against the other's shirt. "Although I still hate you, and want you off my lap. Touching you is making me want to puke."

Zim glanced at the other, but he kept on scanning despite. "You are the one with your appendages of affection around Zim, and not the other way around." He glanced again, feeling the other's mouth on his shoulder. "Careful with that mouth, it's a very deadly weapon. Your vomit is probably deadly. You could projectile your innard goo at your enemies when in danger. A useful defense mechanism to have. See, I made a good choice." It was hard to tell if Zim was being serious, or joking around.

Dib opened his eyes and quickly looked down at his own arms as if just then realizing he did indeed have them around Zim. He moved them away immediately and crossed them over his chest, behind the other's back while moving his head off Zim's shoulder as well. "You're so disgusting. So far you don't have any good qualities at all, it seems. The more you talk, the more I don't like about you."

"Who said Zim liked you?" Zim promptly closed the book in one hand, the scan switched off in the other. The boy tossed the book aside and stood up, smoothing his skirt and stepping from Dib. He tucked the scanner away back in his back-pak and dusted his hands off. "Not I."

Dib watched Zim for a moment before raising a brow. "I didn't say anything about you liking me either." With those words, he moved to sit up from the floor, not even bothering to put the books away after. Instead, he made his way to the end of the aisle and turned to look back at Zim. "I have to go back to the table and grab my bag. Are you done here, or did you still want to look up some more stuff?"

"Earth. I need a book about the Earth; cities, basic populations, maps. I need one of those. Then I will be done." Zim glanced around. "Here, anyway. For now." He looked back at Dib. "If there is information on little disks, be it whatever shape; square, round, rhombus, hexagon… That would be far easier for information retrieval." He crossed his arms at that.

Dib looked over at the books on the shelf before darting his eyes back to Zim. He gave a small annoyed sound as he moved his hand out to take hold of one of the shorter boy's crossed arms. "Come on. I'll take you to where they keep a few information disks." With that, he turned around and started leading Zim out of the aisle and through the library. He ignored the three giggling girls as they passed by them on the way out. His only concern was getting to the middle of the library where a smaller shelf stood. There, he stopped and stood, letting go of Zim's arm in the process. It only took him a few moments of searching before he pulled out two hard plastic cases and handed them over to the other teen. "Here, this is what you want. Two CDs that have all the info."

Zim turned from waving to the girls to take the CDs handed to him, rubbing his pulled arm afterwards. "Good. These are good." He turned the cases over, looking at them idly. "Good." His gaze flicked back up to Dib and he sidled closer to the other, just enough so only the other could hear. "You're done for today. Dismissed." A gloved finger ran down Dib's front to his bellybutton piercing, which was flicked. "Go do what it is a Dib does." Zim glanced from the piercing and back up to Dib through his dark hair before he backed away.

Dib moved his hand down to rub at his stomach after his piercing had been toyed with. He was about to say something nasty to Zim, but instead something else came to his mind that he knew he would regret later on when all was said and done. He moved his hand up so he could flick the shorter boy's hair aside before stepping forward to lean down and press his lips on green ones. It wasn't very long, but it was long enough for laughter to clearly be heard from Alex and a loud 'Oh my god this skool is insane!' from Zita. Dib pulled away right after that and without looking down at Zim, he turned and walked away to the table where his bag sat, picking it up. If the skool didn't believe Zim's horrible lie before, they would now. With those miserable thoughts, he walked out of the library, refusing to look back at Zim.


	4. Chapter 4

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass backwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 04

Another day, another middle skool morning, the same people at the same lockers but with new words passing from their lips. Today the gossip was whipping quickly from mouth to ear, from student to student, at clocked speed. The incident in the library had wide spread, thanks to the three girls who had witnessed everything first hand. It seemed that the rumors about the new kid were solidified into fact, and all the more fed fuel doused paper into the spreading fire of gossip.

All the same, it didn't sway the small lithe teen leaning impatiently against a specific locker. Everyone knew exactly whose locker that was, and that had eyes glued even more onto Zim. Impatiently, Zim tapped the toe of his boot against the floor, crossing striped arms as he looked left and right. He felt like some kind of freak in a glass jar as students gawked by; though better for the reasons at hand, and not others that he feared.

Zim nearly fell over, startled out of his spooch by the horrendously loud bell for the start of first class rang.

It wasn't long after the bell that Zim would finally be disturbed again by another sound, when a long arm clothed in mesh moved out to slam its hand on the locker next to his head. Fingertips, the only thing free of the cloth, tapped themselves impatiently on the metal for a few seconds until the owner gave out a heavy sigh. "Can you move...please?" Dib pulled his attention on the shorter teen as soon as he stood in front of him, and tried his hardest not to look annoyed, but considering how late he was, it was hard.

Zim glared at the other for being startled a second time. "How dare you keep Zim waiting! Why are you so late?" He rose on tip toes to try to raise his hard narrowed gaze up to Dib's height. "I can't afford to waste time like you. I have a schedule to keep." He poked Dib's bare stomach. "And still freezing your organs." Zim tsked.

Dib quickly moved his arm away from the locker, just so he could move it over his stomach like he had the other times Zim poked him. "Would you quit that?" He moved his hand up to pull at the ties on his shirt, as if that would help protect it from the teen in front of him. "If you can't afford to waste time, then just go to class. Certainly, you don't need me to hold your hand through everything." He scowled. "Now move. I need to get in my locker."

The expression on the green boy's face was anything but innocent. "Where you're going, you won't need what is inside of here." Zim leaned back heavily on Dib's locker, grinning at the other as he watchfully narrowed one eye as the other was covered by dark hair. "All Zim needs, is right in front of him." The halls had gone empty, so Zim's voice fell quieter.

Dib's expression grew worse at those words. It seemed as if he may actually try to just throw Zim aside so he could get to his locker, but the hard look to his eyes soon fell away. His shoulders slumped and he moved forward, leaning with his bag against the locker beside his own. "I just get to skool and you can't even give me a moment's peace." He let out a long sigh. "I'm really starting to regret this 'relationship'." He had moved his fingers up in quotes at the last word before he went on while turning his eyes to Zim. "What do you want anyway?"

"You said it yourself, Dib-thing. Skool time is my time." Zim pushed himself from the locker to sidle over and drape his arms from Dib's shoulders. "You are going to escort Zim to the biggest library this shiny morning. No stinky learning for you today. Just you, Zim, and that information you promised yesterday."

Dib looked down at the other body that was suddenly so close to him, then took a glance around the halls. He deemed it safe, and moved his arms up to remove Zim's own from his body so that he could walk forward without Zim attached to him. "I didn't know you were going to drag me away from skool just so you could go to the library." He turned back around to face the shorter teen and gave barely any hint of a smile. "You're really dedicated to this assignment. That's pretty pathetic." The smile turned into a grin. "Besides, I didn't promise at all. I just said I would. That doesn't count as a promise."

Zim wagged a finger and tsked. "It isn't nice to play word games with a foreigner. But!" He rocked from heel to toe on his boots, tilting his head with that usual grin on his face. "I'm sure you're familiar with the word 'blackmail'. An English word, yes? I really didn't want to resort to it. But, since the situation has come to it." Zim slunk closer, drawing a gloved finger down Dib's front much like before, giving the piercing a gentle tug. "Besides, I wasn't the one that kissed Zim. You did that on your own." He raised his head up to look at Dib with a mused narrow of eyes. "That was never a part of the agreement."

Dib flinched one eye closed at the tug. Even though it didn't hurt, it still annoyed him considering it was a bit sensitive. Zim's last few words caused Dib to blush and he quickly averted his eyes, not even bothering to try and push the other's hand away like the other times. "You wanted people to believe it, right? I just made it more official, considering it was still more of a rumor. Now you don't have to worry about people questioning it. There are still rumors, yes, but soon they'll be put to rest once the girls we saw in the library yesterday get around to _everyone_." He moved a hand up and fiddled with his ear. "That's all it was."

"Those gibbering girls in the library also told me you don't always go to your classes." Zim toyed with the belly piercing still; a shiny object out in the open just begged to be. "So, what's one day outside of this prison? A vacation. Zim isn't completely bad company." His hand finally fell away from the piercing. "You said so yourself, Dibness. When you did this." Zim slipped his arms around the other's bare middle.

Dib tensed even more at the sudden closeness. "I didn't mean to do that, and I'm sure I was out of my mind when I said that." He dropped his hand back down, but the only place it had to go was on top of Zim's arm, which caused him to let out a small groan. His eyes fell back on Zim and he stared at the shorter boy with an expression of complete hatred until finally, he cracked. A small pout came to his face and his voice fell low. "Fine, I'll skip skool and take you today."

Zim let out a happy squeam and gave Dib's middle a squeeze before he let go, bouncing happily for a moment. "It's a date then." He happily spun on the balls of his feet a moment, though almost fell over. With a few steadying blinks and a grin, he offered his hand. "Lead the way."

Instead of taking Zim's hand, Dib turned around and started down the hall he had come from earlier, towards the front doors. "It's not a date." He moved his eyes around, glancing at each door he passed in some form of paranoia, as if at any moment another student or teacher would pop out. It wasn't the fear of getting caught skipping that he was worried about. It was the fact he was with Zim and it still bugged him. "How long were you waiting for me anyway?"

Zim frowned and crossed his arms since he was scorned, following down the hall with no real care who saw him. "Half hour." He huffed. "Why were you so late? You weren't off writing cry-sob-wah poetry about yesterday, were you?" Zim shot Dib a glare with his words.

Dib stopped for a moment, just so he could look back and narrow his eyes on Zim. "You are a complete jerk and I despise you. I can never say that enough." With those words, he turned his eyes ahead once more and kept walking. The doors soon came into view after a few moments. "And for your information, I was late because I slept in. I didn't get to sleep until late last night."

Zim rolled his eyes, completely unimpressed. "One can only imagine because of what filthy reason why." he retorted back.

"One can only imagine what filthy reason is going through your filthy mind." Dib shot back before pulling the doors open and letting himself out. He didn't even keep them open for Zim, and instead started down the stairs. He kept walking until he got to the end of the sidewalk where he turned and looked back, knowing the shorter teen would be more than annoyed with him. "You know, you never did tell me where you're from. Obviously I figure it's not walking distance. I don't see many green people around here." He waved his hand around. "Unless there's some underground city that I don't know about." He gave a snort at that.

Zim marched down the stairs. "'What do you care'." He pushed past Dib, arms crossed, definitely not pleased with how things were going so far on his day out. "Far enough. It doesn't matter anyway. Zim is here, that's what counts. So. Tell me about the city. Text books are so boring. And I'm sure you've lived here your entire boring Dib life. Make this interesting." He looked around; otherwise he might as well just finish the job overnight. How dull.

Dib couldn't help but let a small smirk cross over his face. It was fun getting under the new kid's skin sometimes. "It's not that special. Well, I mean, it is and it isn't." He was making things confusing and he knew it. "It's the same as any other city." He started walking away from the skool, taking a right down the sidewalk. "It has all the normal things a city has. The only difference is that people act like the Professor is their god and seem to answer to him instead of the actual people that run the place." He shoved a hand in his pocket and gave an annoyed sigh. "Makes me sick how much my dad brown noses the guy."

Zim's attention was sparked. "The Professor. Yes. I read about him." He followed next to Dib. "He must be an important piece if the people here regard him so highly." the boy thought aloud. "The Professor has made many advances for this city, as apposed to others on this planet. Heh." Zim laughed to himself, entertained by something unspoken. "He's the one that implemented most of the automated services and securities that run and defend this city." Zim glanced to the other. "But that is news; your 'dad' works for this man? Convenient." Dib's sister was the most popular in skool, his father worked for the most powerful man, but still Dib was the bottom feeder of the food chain. But still, talk about having connections fall right in your lap.

Dib waved a dismissive hand at Zim's sudden interest in his life. "He doesn't help with anything important. He mostly just checks over prototypes to make sure they aren't completely bugged." He shrugged his shoulders while letting his hand fall back down. "There are tons of other people that do that though. Saying my dad helps with that is like saying he works as a janitor at that huge lab. Like I said, not important." Dib blinked his eyes and looked towards Zim. "Why is any of this convenient?"

Zim narrowed his eyes and chuckled quietly to himself. "I have a bit of experience in lab work. Part time jobs back home. Maybe I'll get a summer job there." he spoke coolly. "But go on." He loosely gestured about, meaning the city.

Dib kept his gaze on Zim for a bit longer, until he gave in and finally looked back at the sidewalk. "Well, I'll start by telling you this, the city has a problem with arsonists. Every month another building is set on fire. Last month it was the fire department." He gave a small dry laugh. "Some idiot thought it would be some kind of strange irony to do it." He raised his hand up and moved his other out of his pocket so that he could count off his fingers. "One time it was the mall, which I thought was pretty funny. Another time it was a car dealership. I think a time after that it was an actual car." He dropped his hands and looked back at Zim. "The people here like fire a lot."

Zim blinked at Dib a few times before he chuckled at the other's words. His chuckle turned into a laugh which ended up going into a full cackle. He hugged his middle as he shook with hilarious laughter. "The people here are idiots!" He shook his head as he continued to laugh. He tried to stifle it with a hand but it only continued out as giggles. "Fire!"

Dib stopped for a second just so he could watch Zim, and soon he couldn't help but let out a small quiet laugh of his own. He started walking again, but sped up just so he could walk in front of the shorter teen, turning around so he was moving backwards. "No, no, that's not the best part." He moved his hands up in front of Zim and waved them back and forth, trying to quiet the other down so he could go on. "One of them actually tried to catch the Professor's lab on fire. Part of the place ended up exploding, and it could almost be felt through half the city when it happened." A grin came over his face. "They caught the guy that did it and he was never heard from again. Spooky, right?"

Zim erupted into laughter again, letting his hand fall back to holding his middle. His shoulders still shook as he tried to settle his laughter down. "Wow. Self sufficient and destructive." He rubbed the tears from one eye from laughing so hard, still, he chuckled. "What a city. Esplode!" He flared a hand and the sound affect only had him going into a giggle fit again. "I wish I could have seen that."

Dib's steps slowed until he finally stopped just a few feet from Zim. He had been laughing along with the other teen, but his laughter died down at the other's last words. He blinked his eyes a few times and couldn't help the slow small smirk that came to his face. "I could take you there." Dib spoke as he walked forward to stand in front of Zim. He moved both his arms up just so he could place them on the other's shoulders, linking his hands around the shorter boy's neck. The act was something he knew he wouldn't have done ever in his right mind, but he was in too much of a good mood to care. So, he would play along for now. "The lab is still being worked on because the explosion was pretty big. I could take you after we're done at the library, so that you can see what they haven't cleaned up yet."

Zim practically lit up and his laughter subsided. Clawed thumbs slipped themselves in the pockets of Dib's tight pants, and the boy was tugged closer to Zim; though Zim slunk the closest. "Yes! I want to see the destruction." His grin was wide and his chest heaved slightly, almost out of breath. "I want to see the mythical place of explosion that shook the town." He pressed his chest to Dib's, his voice falling quiet and huskier. "Did you feel it? The fiery explosion?"

Dib jumped a bit, startled at Zim's actions. Having the shorter teen so close to him caused him to stay silent for a long time before he realized Zim had actually asked him a question. "Feel it?" Dib averted his eyes after he echoed the question, suddenly wanting to look at anything but Zim. "Y-Yeah, I felt it. My dad had us move closer to the lab not too long after he got the job, so when the explosion happened, it pretty much rocked the house." His hands wrung themselves behind the other's neck for a few seconds before he went on, suddenly nervous. "It caused a huge commotion on our block."

Dib could feel the thoughtful sound purr in Zim's chest before the green boy spoke "It must have been quite a disturbance." Zim chuckled low in his throat. "I bet you loved it though. Stuff falling every which way, things falling over, fragiles breaking..." He neared his head to the other's, and had he had a nose, it would have touched Dib's. "Bet the Dib even ran out to see the flaming chaos too."

Dib quickly stared back right into Zim's eyes when the other boy invaded his personal space too much for his liking. He didn't try to pull away though, and instead he continued to stand just as close to the shorter teen. "I might have." He quickly shook his head at what he said, but still kept his eyes on Zim's. "I mean, ran outside to look." Without even thinking about it, one of his fingers that was free of the mesh moved to stroke the back of Zim's neck as he kept talking. "That's not to say it wasn't interesting I wouldn't have looked if it wasn't." A guilty look came over his face. "It wasn't boring."

Zim's gaze shifted shut some, needless to say he was quite placated. "I'm betting." He didn't bother to fight his shutting eyes and relaxed quite easily. "All flamey with fire. Quite exciting, yes? Bet you'd want to see such excitement again, wouldn't you?" He cracked an eye open to glance at Dib.

Dib shrugged his shoulders at Zim's words. "I don't know. It was a change from the normal and it was pretty entertaining just to watch most of the people panicking over it." His eyes dropped down to his arms. He realized in that moment just what he was doing, but instead of moving his hands away, he only narrowed his eyes. "I was able to come up with some pretty good drawings after it happened." Despite his expression, a small smirk came to his lips as he moved his eyes back to Zim's own. "Yeah, I guess I wouldn't mind seeing it happen again."

Zim chuckled lazily, bowing his head a moment; half debating if he should rest his head against Dib's shoulder. "Well, if you're a good Dib, you might not have to wait long." That said, he slipped his hands from Dib's pockets, resting them on the other's hips as he pulled away, then completely, a few steps. He shook his head to get his hair from both eyes; with obviously no success. "Let the journey continue." He offered his hand once more, like before, still with a lazy grin.

Dib let his own arms drop back down to his sides once Zim stepped back. The words the other said had him tilting his head as a curious expression came over his face, but once Zim offered his hand he forgot all about it. He looked down and debated if he should just turn around and start walking again. Looking up, though, he realized that as they had been talking, people had been walking around them, which meant he had no dignity left even out of skool. So, with a heavy sigh, he raised a hand back up just to grab hold of the other teen's and clasped their fingers. "You're such a pain." He didn't even wait for the other to answer before he started dragging him along.

Zim gave a happy cackle, a few quick marching steps and he was up to speed beside the other. "Admit it, you like it." He clasped the other's hand back, his pointed fingers barely digging into skin.

Dib gave a short glance back before just as quickly looking at the sidewalk ahead. "No, I don't like it." He took a sharp turn as soon as he neared the corner. "I will be so glad when this agreement is over. Having you hang all over me all day is not going to be pleasant." He gave a shudder that ran through his whole body. "I still can't believe I kissed you. I really was out of my mind yesterday." He looked back just to glance at their hands. "I'm out of my mind today, as well it seems."

"No, I think you are well inside it. More inside it than you've ever been." Zim looked over the passing scenery, paying no mind to Dib's display of facial disgust. So many naive idiots in one place, going nowhere fast. It was kind of hypnotic to watch. But the air smelled terrible! Zim waved a hand in front of his face; vehicle exhaust, how vile. "Dib." Zim's attention fell back on the other. "I am going to ask you one question. If you do not answer it seriously, Zim will be greatly offended." He playfully swung their hands between them. "Understood?"

Dib raised his eyes up from their hands to meet Zim's eyes. He kept his gaze on the other's face for a few moments until he finally looked away. His attention more on where he was taking them than anything else at the moment. "Yeah sure, I guess."

Zim smiled, pleased with the cooperation. "If you knew you had one day, only one, before the entire planet was destroyed;" He hopped from one foot to the other idly. "what would you do?"

Dib's steps slowed, and when Zim was done talking, they were finally standing in front of the steps that led to the doors of the library. He didn't move to start up the stairs and instead turned to face Zim once more with their hands still clasped. "That's a stupid question." Even though those words left his mouth, he still answered. "If I only had one day left, then I would just deal with the fact I had one day left." A small scowl formed on his face. "Why suddenly decide I want to do something different on that day as apposed to any other day? It doesn't matter what last thing I was to do. It would all be over anyway."

Zim's brows rose some. "Hm. How very realistic." But just as quickly as the compliment left him, he gave a disappointed look Dib's way. "But so very, very boring." He tugged his hand free of the other's and started up the steps to the library. "You'd probably write stupid poetry about it anyway." he added without looking back.

Dib glared at Zim's back as the other teen walked up the stairs. After a few moments he let out an annoyed sigh and followed after the green teen, catching up to him after a bit. "Quit making fun of my poetry. I don't make fun of how ridiculous you look." He ran his eyes over Zim before letting out an amused sound. "And you really do look ridiculous."

That had Zim's gaze snapping behind him to Dib in a sharp glare. "At least I didn't skin a screen door and wear its hide on my arms. What's next; the couch? Or the poor helpless curtains?" He slammed his hands into the door and marched into the library.

Dib looked down at his arms for a quick moment, before a small pout came over his face that he sent Zim's way. The other teen was already inside the brick building though, so the look was wasted on the glass doors. With a defeated noise, Dib hurried up the rest of the stairs and opened the doors himself, letting them slam closed behind him. It was easy to catch sight of Zim, so he tried his best to catch up to the green boy without causing too much of a commotion. "Is there anything about me that you can talk about without putting it down?" He crossed his arms over his chest. "Maybe then I could do the same."

Zim walked down a random isle, not giving Dib another look as the other followed. "You first." he returned curtly. He looked along the titles as he walked, definitely the wrong section; 'how to fit this entire book down your throat in six easy steps! Impress your friends!' Oh yes, this planet needed exploding; or at least set on fire for a very long time. "I have yet to hear compliments leave your deadly stinger mouth on Zim." He ran a claw along the spines of books as he walked.

Dib clacked the piercing in his tongue against his teeth rather loudly at the last thing Zim said. His eyes moved over to watch Zim's hand as it moved along the books, becoming curious with the other's fingers. "Alright then. I like your hair." It seemed as if that was all Dib was going to say, but after a small noise, he spoke up again. "And you look better in a skirt than half the girls in our skool." He raised a hand up to scratch at his cheek after the words left him. "Happy?"

The green boy stopped and paused. Slowly, he turned to look up at Dib, skeptical at first. "You like Zim's hair?" He pointed at his dark hair before running a hand through the thick bangs that always over hung his face. "And my..-skirt?" Zim tugged at the bottom hem of his black skirt, racked with buckles, the colour matching his pants and boots. He scoffed some before he crossed his arms, one hand tapping his teeth in thought. "Fine. Your..-you're very. Hm." He narrowed his eyes, straining to pluck something from his brain. "You." He knocked at his head. "I like it when..-no. Uh." He pointed at Dib's belly piercing. "I like that. Yes."

Dib raised a brow. "Gee, thanks." He turned his attention away just so he could look around the aisle they were in. Nothing of real interest was around. At least nothing he thought Zim would be looking for. "Hmm, come on." He reached his hand out to grab hold of the other's much like before. He then started to drag Zim around, out of the aisle and down the library until he got to a small stand that kept what looked like a book much too large to be held up. "You wanted a dictionary, right?" He let go of Zim's hand just so the other teen could stand next to him. "This is the only one they have here. Well, the biggest one at least. It's the most up to date and as far as I know, the most accurate. You can't take it with you though."

The hand Zim had raised to rub his arm stopped in the air and fell back at his side. His eyes grew wide and his entire body went straight and stiff, while his arms were as lax and limp as noodles. "T-that-?" he squeaked. It was huge! Scanning it would take- years; how many useless words were in this pathetic language he had to pretend to be fluent in to speak.

Dib blinked his eyes at Zim's sudden change in mood. "Yeah, that." He shrugged his shoulders while moving a hand out to flip through random pages in the book. His eyes never really settled on one word the entire time. "So what? You don't need the entire thing, right? Just start working on your assignment here and while you're doing that, you can keep checking this back and forth between your work if it's really that important." He turned his attention back on Zim. "That's what you need it for, right?"

The green boy went entirely limp, it was a miracle he stayed standing. He turned his head to look at Dib, his hair unkind to his sight. "A-anything in that See-Dee format instead?" He smiled weak and hopefully.

Dib shook his head while he stopped playing with the pages. "There is no dictionary on CD. There's no point in it." He moved to lean against the stand, letting his bag drop from one shoulder in the process. "It would be pretty stupid for one person to sit there for hours listening to a CD that has every word in the human language and their meanings. If there was such a person, and I was that person, I'd shoot myself."

"I wouldn't be listening to it." Zim promptly thudded his forehead against Dib's chest. "Just, using it for reference. I can't run ALL the way back here each time I don't know a word. That would be a waste of Zim's precious, precious time!" He tinkered with Dib's belly ring, which he noticed was just below his line of sight. "Stupid human language. You can't need i _every_ /i word in there to be spoken. I bet you've only spoken two percent-- no- point zero two percent of that book."

Dib raised a hand, about to slap Zim's own away, but at the last second, decided against it. It was useless trying to get the other teen to leave the piece of metal alone, so he decided to just give up. "More than likely." He let his hand move out to flick what he could see of Zim's hair aside, before dropping it back down. "Just don't worry about it. You've gotten this far with the weird way you use words. I'm sure the way you write can't be any worse, right?" He tapped his foot on the floor for a second before stuttering out his next words. "I-If you want...I could help you? You want me to stick around you anyway."

Zim slowly raised his head up to look at Dib, one eye narrowed. "_You_?"

Dib tensed up at the sudden look Zim gave him, but slowly a scowl formed on his face. "Geez, you act like I'm diseased or something." He looked away to the side as the scowl fell and he began to pout. "You're the one that's suddenly having problems with the assignment because you don't have a dictionary. I just figure that if you have trouble with a word or something, I could help you out."

Zim stood back up straight, using Dib as ground to do so. "Zim never has trouble with his assignments; _ever_." He looked back at the big, mean dictionary and gave a whine. Rubbing between his eyes, he sighed. "Find Zim what you did before. But get as much information as you can on See-Dee instead of book format." Zim pulled the scanner from before from his back-pak and handed it to Dib. "Anything on current cities on this planet, their military; just the same as you did for this one. That should be good."

Dib took the scanner from Zim's hands and gave a small sigh. "Fine, whatever you say." He moved away from the stand and shrugged his bag back on his other shoulder. "This is such a stupid essay. I'm so glad I've never had to transfer." With those last few words he made his way over to where he knew a much larger selection of CDs were located, compared to the one at skool.

"And you won't ever." Zim quietly chuckled to himself. That kept the Earth-monkey busy, doing his dirty work, while it left himself to something a little more fun; messing with human technology.  
Zim walked over to a free computer in a long row of computers set up for research. There weren't many people on the computers, but it didn't matter, no one would notice, had noticed, or cared so far for the earless, noseless, green skinned teen anyway.

With a readying inhale, Zim crackled his knuckles and wiggled his fingers over the keyboard. "Computer. I command you to turn on."

Nothing happened.

"Turn on." Zim repeated. Still nothing. "On. Now." Still nothing. He poked a random key on the keyboard. Nothing. He poked more keys. Not a thing. "Zim demands you turn on." He tapped the screen. Its screen obviously wasn't touch activated. He shook the box shaped screen and pressed the side of his head to it; something rattled inside. "Maybe... it's empty." He made a thoughtful noise. "Guess it's the old fashion way for Zim." he narrated, pulling out cord from his back-pak. He leaned over the computer tower, looking over the back. With a squeal he plugged it in the appropriate port. "Good to see all places of insertion are universal."

There were a few giggles and whistles behind Zim and quickly he stood back up and pulled the back of his skirt down. "Perverts!" he hissed back, shaking a fist.

In his search through the CDs, Dib hadn't really been all that surprised to find most of what Zim had wanted. The normal library was much more up to date and efficient than the one at Skool. By the time he was done, he had ten cases that he was trying to carry, but thankfully they were pretty thin. Otherwise, he was sure he would have dropped them all. It made his trip a bit harder though. In the end, he gave in and put a few of the cases inside his bag and settled for carrying some under his arm. The final books he was able to find tucked under the other arm. The scanner was clutched between his teeth as he tried to carry everything else.

Not seeing Zim near where Dib had left him, the teen gave in and just picked a table at random to sit down at. He didn't really care either way, as it let him drop everything he had been carrying. He didn't even opened his bag to take out the rest, and instead just set it aside in favor of taking the scanner out of his mouth and switching it on. His hand picked up the first book it touched and he quickly got to work.

Zim, on the other hand, sat perfectly at ease in his chair at the computer. With arms crossed and one leg draped over the other, he hummed a random tune to himself, tapping the beats with his toe. On the screen, images, videos, and information in different windows popped on and off. This was far easier than manually scouring for information; and far quicker for that matter.

Zim turned his gaze to finally have a proper look at the library, since he had the time in his accomplishments. It was big, but Zim had seen bigger and far more impressive on other planets. There was nothing of any particular worth, nothing to be bothered saving. It would all be quite better conquered. The alien race here would probably end up serving soft drinks and fast food to him and other cosmic races; and isn't that what really mattered in the long run?

As his eyes wandered, Zim spotted Dib busy at his work at a table, not too far off. It was amazing how easy this all was; far too brilliant. It was a shame to think that the Dib would end up just another slave like the rest of his useless species. Not that there were many qualities about the Dib worth keeping. Zim ho-hummed. Just another planet under his many tallies of conquered. He rested his cheek on a hand; how boring. At least there was some little amusement on this planet. Zim glanced back to Dib.

The whole task of scanning page after page was soon becoming tedious and boring to Dib. One of his arms had moved up so that an elbow could rest on the table, and his chin could rest on his hand during the process. The position only caused him to become more tired and bored of the situation. He had told Zim that he hadn't gotten any sleep the night before and it was true. His sister had invited all of the other cheerleaders over for some kind of meeting, which turned into a party, which turned into him staying in his room the entire time and getting no sleep until they left.  
Realizing in that moment that he was alone with no Zim around to pester him, Dib gave out a low groan before he dropped the scanner on the table. Right after that, his head was soon to follow right on the book he was scanning as he tried to get some semblance of sleep while the terror that had been unleashed on him was gone.

Zim jerked upright in his chair as he saw what Dib did. Asleep! How dare he! On _his_ mission? No hired help falls asleep on him!

The green boy made motion to move but felt the tie back of the cord still in the computer, searching and downloading. Zim grunted then groaned and sat back down. There was no leaving, not while he was still plugged in. But still, Dib was wasting Zim's precious time!

Then again… Zim tugged the cord at his pak, more cord came out for slack. He grinned. He had enough extension to walk over and give the Dib an awakening smack.

Up Zim rose, leaving a corded trail behind as he walked over to Dib's table; in the process tripping over two students and tangling up some poor kindergartener. But he made it and scowled down at the other boy. "Pierced-monkey." he hissed, tugging on the pierced lock. "No sleeping on the job!"

The tug on his hair had Dib jerking back with the action and letting out an annoyed groan. "Zim..." The name came out as more of a whine than an actual name. "I wasn't sleeping I was resting my eyes. I swear." He let his eyes fall back down on the book that looked so inviting, even though it was as hard as a rock. "Just a few more minutes."

Zim crossed his arms and bore his gaze straight through Dib's big head; mmm swiss cheese brain matter, just like mom used to make. "You don't need sleep. Sleep is unnecessary. What do you need to sleep for? Your eyes look rested enough as they are." He jutted out his lower jaw stubbornly. Another random student tripped over the wire with a yelp; books went flying.

Dib looked back at the sudden disturbance and blinked his eyes. "Um..." He moved a hand up to scratch at his head, causing the piercing in his hair to jingle. "Well, I need it to function." He looked back at Zim and raised a brow. "What do you run on, coffee twenty-four seven?" He shook his head and looked back down at the book while letting his hand fall down to pick the scanner back up. "Although, I guess that would explain why you never want to sit still."

"Cough. Heat?" Zim blinked curiously. He tapped his teeth with a claw and then suddenly pointed it. "Coffee! A beverage consisting of an infusion of ground coffee beans." He made quote fingers as he spoke. "'He ordered a cup of coffee'. A seed of the coffee tree; ground to make coffee. Also," he pointed "a medium to dark brown color." Zim jabbed a finger Dib's way. "I knew there was a digital thing with the words and the stuff that is definitions!"

"You're so strange." Dib started to run the scanner over each page, much like he had been before he had tried to sleep. "You have to be the first person I've met that didn't know what coffee was. You talk in third person so much I sometimes get confused." He flipped the page and started scanning the next one immediately. "Not to mention you are the only person that has been so fascinated with my navel piercing that it scares me." He gave a small yawn before he was able to go on. "I should start poking at you in sensitive places and see how you like it."

"Oh!" Zim rested his hands on the table and leaned forward, invading that personal space of Dib's. "Is that a promise?" Unfortunately, it pulled the cord behind him more taut and four more students in crossing (one of them a college student) went tripping over.

Dib looked behind himself, at the poor souls that were sprawled out on the floor. He only gave a small shrug at the situation before turning his eyes back to Zim. "Isn't it a little too early in our relationship for foreplay?" With that, he turned his eyes back to the book and tapped the scanner against the page a few times before he continued his work. "Go ask someone else to grope you."

That last comment had the back of Zim's hand slapping across Dib's cheek. The green boy then turned around, quite insulted, and stormed from the table, dragging the many people he'd caught in his tangled mess of cord he'd weaved, back with him to the computer he'd originally been on.

The slap had Dib's eyes widening and his glasses tilting if not almost falling from his face. What people that weren't being dragged along behind Zim were suddenly staring at him, and it had him trying to hide his face behind his hand as he righted his glasses. Once he did that, he shot a nasty look Zim's way, but the other teen wasn't even looking at him. The slap that had been given to him was much too painful, and he still didn't understand how that could be possible.

Dib let his eyes fall back to the work laid out in front of him, giving up on Zim and with a scowl he threw the scanner aside without even turning it off. He stood up from the chair and picked up his bag, dumping out the rest of the CDs in the process before he closed it up. "Screw this. It was a stupid idea." With those words he slung his bag over his shoulder and headed back towards the glass doors.

Zim stalked all the way to his chair, but he didn't sit down, no. He wouldn't let Dib have the last word. That aggravating and uncooperative human. Zim sharply turned around and jabbed a finger in Dib's direction. "YOU'RE A HORRIBLE BOYFRIEND! Walking out on me!" his voice cracked, but it was more out of anger.

"Lawl." One student giggled to another. "Lovers spat."

"I think she's pregnant." The other whispered loudly. Many gasps followed that one; all eyes on Dib.

Dib stopped in his tracks at that. His fists clenched at his sides tightly, and without much thought to what he was doing, he quickly turned around and pointed towards Zim. "She can't be pregnant you morons, because _she_ is a _he_!" Of course maybe it would have been better if he had just kept his mouth shut, because suddenly it was like he was back in skool all over again. Why was he always surrounded by the most giggly and annoying people?

Dib bowed his head with a groan and dropped his hand. He should have just walked away. Why he didn't ignore the green teen was beyond him. Usually nothing could get under his skin so badly. What was wrong with him?

Zim clapped his hands on his cheeks and shook his head fretfully. "How can you be so insensitive, Dib-stain! To our unborn child!" His hands fluttered down to his chest. "Oh wait, humans carry their worm babies in their…" he murmured quickly to himself as he lowered his hands to his stomach. "Zim is just a young girl, just moved to the big shiny, scary city from the, uh, dirt farm back home." He quickly clicked his back-pak and the cord unlatched from the computer and zipped from around the people, back to its source. "All Zim ever wanted was a place to belong. And to be loved. Yes. Loveless is Zim!" He casually walked over to the mess of table Dib had left, cracking open the CD cases and dumping the CDs in his pak; people were far too interested in the drama to care what he was doing. "Now our twin smee--babies, Bleech and Klein, will be fatherless, as Zim goes to live on the streets. They'll be addicted to baking soda and liquid soup because I can't afford anything else to feed them!"

People shook their wide eyed heads, whispering and clicking their tongues at Dib; what was the world coming to these days! Illegitimate children- for shame!

Dib's body seemed to shake more and more with each word Zim said. Every whispered word that he could hear from people he didn't know wasn't helping the situation much either. Finally, with quick steps, Dib nearly stomped over to Zim and grabbed his arm. "We're leaving. _Now_!" He left no real room for argument considering he was already dragging the other teen towards the glass doors, ready to slam the fragile material aside once he got to them.

"Careful-! You'll hurt the smeets- Baby!-- I said baby- er- babies!"

Then the library alarm went off; the CDs were still in Zim's back-pak.

Zim blinked, more startled by the alarm than Dib's dark furious anger. "Oh. RUN FAST!" He latched onto the mesh on Dib's arm, his turn to yank the boy, out through the doors, pulling him to leap over the stairs, not bothering to take the time to go down them.

Dib almost flew through the air considering Zim was still pulling him when the shorter boy decided to jump over each stair. "Zim!" He knew calling the other's name would do no good, but he felt the need to scream something in that moment. As soon as his feet touched the ground and they started running, he tried to yank his arm free, but it felt like Zim had a death grip on him, so he was forced to run with the shorter teen as best he could. "You moron! Why didn't you put the books back? I hate you!"

Zim cackled, pulling Dib along as he took down a street, jerking the other left and right to dodge people who just didn't bother to move for the rampaging teenagers. "There-! I gave you new inspiration to write! You owe Zim now!" He lashed out a hand to grab a street lamp and whip them around to run across a careless street. He gave a hard grunt when he yanked Dib with him, it panged his shoulder joint, but he still didn't let go. "Or, maybe it makes us even. Something." Zim glanced back. "No one is chasing us. Victory! Our grand escape is successful!"

Dib finally yanked his arm free of Zim's grip and glared hard at the other as he slowed to a stop. "You are so unbelievable." He walked up to the shorter teen and kept walking until he backed the other into a wall. "You stole from a library, Zim. You know how completely stupid that is? It's a library!" He moved his arms up and placed his hands on either side of the wall by Zim's head, nearly bending forward and invading the other's space. "I should just turn around right now and forget all about you and this agreement we made because so far it's been nothing but trouble. Screw everyone at skool. They can think what they want."

Zim's pak clacked against the paint chipped wall and he tried to press as close to it as possible, hands spreading over the surface, the back of his head clunked against the wall and he gave a small nervous giggle as it did. His Adams appleless throat dance with a swallow, but still his eyes shifted part way closed. "Don't." he spoke, a begging tone that would never be admitted to hidden under the husky voice. Zim leaned forward, barely an inch, to touch his lips in the briefest of kisses before moving back, head clunking against the wall again. "Please." His voice whispered just that much more as he arched back on the wall.

The tiny kiss had Dib's eyes opening as wide as they could and his hands on the wall clenching. The only reason he didn't completely space out in that moment was because of the one word Zim had spoken after the kiss. He gave one slow blink, trying to snap himself out of it before he finally bowed his head. A heavy sigh came from him that could be seen as his body shifted. Not once did he drop his arms, but they did go slack just a bit. "I hate you..." The words didn't hold their usual bite, but still sounded just as annoyed. "I hate you so much."

A single claw wrapped the pierced lock around itself, letting it pull away with a bounce. "No you don't." Zim's winning grin could definitely be heard, even if it wasn't seen.

"You don't know anything." Dib finally pulled his arms away from the wall and moved away from Zim completely. "Come on. I said I would take you to the lab after we were done at the library." He started walking down the sidewalk without looking back at the other teen. "I might as well do it, or else you won't let me hear the end of it. Maybe afterwards I'll get some sort of peace from you."

Zim pushed from the wall and hurried after Dib with a pleased sound. He walked beside the other, looking around the area in brief curiosity. "You know, I think it's become habit forming, Dibness." He pulled something from his back-pak and offered it Dib's way; the two CDs from the skool library that he'd given Zim. "The security for the library at skool sucks moose."

Dib glanced to the side and let out a groan. "Zim..." Much like he had done in the library, he let out the other's name as a whine. "Now I can see why you had to transfer." His reached a hand out to take the CDs and held them up to look them over. "You're a thief. Did everyone get sick of you stealing from them all the time?" Another noise came from him and he shook his head. "I'm going to be in so much trouble. People knew I was with you yesterday."

Zim pointed at the other and spoke rather matter-o-factly. "Zim haven't stolen from you."

"Yes you have." Dib shifted around so that his bag was in front of him and proceeded to open it up so he could throw the CDs inside. "You stole what little bit of normalcy I had left at Skool." Once he was done, he didn't even bother to move his bag back in place, and just swung it at his side. "Which I will admit wasn't a lot, but what matters is that you stole it."

Zim blinked sharply at that. He gave the other a quick look up and down before he broke out in loud cackling laughter. He glanced back at Dib and saw that the boy was completely serious, which only had Zim laughing harder. He clapped his hands over his mouth to muffle it, but it did little good. Tightly, he shut his eyes and giggled through his fingers. "Hilarious!" Zim fanned his face with a hand. "Well, take it back, pierced-monkey, shorty shirt, screen door skinner, dark of doom, boy of black book. Though be warned:" Zim narrowed his eyes at Dib, still chuckling through his grin "it's kept in a naughty spot."

The laughter didn't really help Dib's mood much, and he shot Zim a dirty look because of it, which only turned disgusted because of the green boy's last words. "That's okay, you can keep it." He turned his eyes back on the sidewalk and swung his bag just a bit harder. "What's your odd fascination with wanting me to touch you? I don't see what's so great about all this physical contact you want."

"Zim is touchable." The green boy nodded. "Lickable. Taste-able. Hug-able. Snug-able. Kiss-able; even _you_, Dib-lips, couldn't resist that one!" Zim pointed in the other's direction triumphantly. "I don't see what your screamy, red faced annoyance is with not touching. If you don't like touch, you should be naked and floating." He stared at Dib. "And you aren't. So, any touch you get is your own fault."

Dib turned his eyes back on Zim and opened his mouth, but closed it just as quickly, not really sure how to answer that last one. So, instead, he forgot about that and tried to defend himself for what else Zim said. "I told you why I did that. You really need to listen better." He gave a small shrug and turned narrowed eyes ahead once more. "I don't really see what's so great about you. You're not so hug-able or whatever else you said. I could easily go without you, and I will when this is all over."

Zim stared at Dib. He raised a hand to scratch through his hair; itchy itchy. "You weren't hugged enough as a child, were you? Oh!" He chuckled quiet and lewdly. "Let me guess: you were hugged _too_ much."

That earned Zim a hard glare that could have very well melted his face off if at all possible. Dib lifted his bag with one hand and moved it in front of the shorter teen's face as he spoke in a low voice. "I am two seconds away from slamming this thing in your face and walking away, just to let someone else pick up the remains."

Zim pushed the bag from his face with a huff. "Such a charmer. Do you say that to all your boyfriends?"

Dib dropped his bag back down and gave a small whine that his anger had been brushed off so easily. "I've never even been in a relationship before, you moron!" His whine turned into an aggravated noise as he turned his attention away from the other. "I don't want to be in a relationship and I was happy not being in one the entire time!" He bowed his head, but still seemed to know where he was going. "Why does nothing get through to you?"

Zim flitted his fingers, wiggling them in gesture. "Then what was that smelly poem about? 'My soul is trapped in your eye balls. One more kiss. And I'll miss.. something.. that probably rhymes with balls.' You know, that one. Seems pretty relationshippy-ness to me."

Dib kept his attention away from Zim, and while the other teen spoke, his own body tensed up. His hand moved up so he could put his bag back on while he walked in silence. After he was settled, he finally spoke up, his voice just as low as before. "Hurry up, we're almost there." With that, his own steps quickened, not really caring if Zim kept up or not.

"HEY!" Zim's arms shot up and he waved them about, making a spectacle of himself. "Zim asked you a question! You heard!" He picked up his own pace to catch up. "Ugh. Don't tell me it involves a tragic past. An organ scorned and broken." He placed a hand on his chest. "Unless it involves severed limbs and weapons of mass destruction flattening and disintegrating cities and towns, it can't be THAT sad." He eyed Dib.

"It's none of your business either way." Dib still refused to look at Zim even as he spoke and kept his eyes on his boots, watching each step he took. "Nothing about my life is any of your business besides that small little bit I told you about my dad, and I still can't believe I told you that." He gave a small shrug. "Small bit of insanity. I won't let it happen again."

Zim rolled his eyes at the drama, sweeping back his thick bangs, but having no ears to tuck the hair behind, it made the motion useless. "As your boyfriend, I am required to know past qualifiers. Especially if they've made enough of an impact for you to 'write' about them." He dropped his hair and it fell back, blinding one eye and he sighed with a shrug. "At least this means you're not used merchandise. Used in the head, yes, but physically you are pristine." He glanced and poked one of the earrings on Dib's ear. "To a point… or pierce, in this case."

Dib quickly moved his head away from Zim's fingers and shot another glare at the other. "It's all pretend. Pretend means you don't have to know anything about me." He gave a small huff before looking back down. "We act all lovey dovey..." He gave a shudder at that." ...around each other and that's it. You don't have to be nosy about my personal business. Get over it."

"Hmf. It was probably just some day you were emotionally constipated anyway." Zim shrugged off Dib's refusal to answer. "It's probably not worth wringing it out of you anyway. I much rather see the place of explodey. Give me flaming random chaos any day over drama, and emotional attachment." He spread out his arms, painting the picture in his minds eye.

Dib only gave a small noise that he even acknowledged anything Zim had said. He was perfectly fine with walking in complete silence while the other boy tried his best to imagine the explosion that was talked about earlier.

Much like Dib had said, they hadn't been far from the lab. Rounding another corner, the gigantic building came in sight and took up almost a whole block. Neon signs were everywhere, around each part of the building signaling what was what just to make it plainly obvious. Just in case the workers didn't know where to go. Only one part of the lab seemed as if it was completely shut down and that was the part that looked as if a bomb had gone off in it. Most of the building was torn off, and construction workers were still trying to piece together what they could to make it whole again.

Dib stopped across the street from the wrecked half and titled his head. An amused sort of sound came from him before he actually spoke up while looking towards Zim. "I told you it was bad."

Zim spared no moment to go running up to the yellow tape and warning signs put to keep pedestrians out of the area. The green boy was all grins as he turned his head this way and that to look at the damage done. He tilted his head and tapped his chin with a thoughtful poise. "I've done worse. Um- I mean, I've _seen_ worse. But, not bad, not bad for someone of our own kind blowing up our own. Really, if this flaming man wanted to do more damage, he should have attacked the places of pillar-age. Ya'know, kick em where it counts. If he just bombed there, there, and there." Zim pointed in specific places of building support. "The WHOLE lab could have come tumbling down in a grand display of exploding BOOM!" He threw out his arms.

Dib had followed slowly behind Zim, taking his time. He wasn't nearly as excited about seeing the damage as the green teen was. A few words the other said had him raising a brow before he shrugged his shoulders, chalking it up to the strange way Zim spoke. "You're weird. I can't believe you're actually standing here, telling me how the person could have gone about actually blowing up the whole building." He moved up behind Zim and took the teen's hands, which were still raised, and brought them down, crossing them both in front of the other's chest along with his own. "You scare me."

Zim chuckled lightly. "Yeaa, I know I'm amazing." He ran his gaze over the charred mortar, metal, tile and glass that littered the area; it was like an impossible shamble that could never be glued together. It was a vast sight, the lab was several stories high, so the ruin and cave ins made curious looking catacombs; strangely inviting to a mind looking for trouble. Zim seemed to relax, despite his arms being loosely pinned to his own chest. "Ever went in? The wreckage? Isn't that what loners and juvenile delinquents do?" Zim glanced back curiously at Dib; of all things he was actually honest in his questions. "That's what the interweb said. Or... maybe I saw it on Tee-Vee." He blinked thoughtfully.

Even when Zim looked at him, Dib still kept his eyes ahead on the work being done to the lab. The questions didn't bother him like they normally would, and instead he answered them calmly. "A few times. It's hard to go in when it's so blocked off. There's a lot of security around this place, especially now. It's tough to come at night, because that's when the guards really look out for trespassers. They've started to slack off, though. The job gets boring." He shrugged his shoulders while still keeping hold of Zim's hands. "At least that's what Dad told me. I've taken advantage of it sometimes to just have a place to go for my own reasons."

Zim leaned back against Dib so he could lean his head back to look at the other better. He blinked a few times, equally curious. "What reasons?"

Dib finally turned his attention down on Zim. The other teen's question had him staying silent for a few moments and it seemed as if he wouldn't answer. His grip loosened on Zim's hands and he turned his eyes away before he finally did speak. "I told you that nothing about me was any of your business."

Zim leaned back more, sticking out a foot to keep his balance as he leaned the back of his head on Dib's shoulder. With a small sound, he landed a quick kiss against Dib's cheek, clicking his heels back together, but he leaned against the other still. "How about now?" He grinned, widely baring rigid teeth.

Dib glanced at Zim out the corner of his eyes at the sudden kiss. Without a word, he finally pulled his hands back away from the other's, just so he could raise one up and wipe his cheek. Once that was done he dropped them back down, only to rest them on Zim's shoulders while looking back at the wreckage. When he spoke again, his voice was low and almost couldn't be heard over the workers. "I don't enjoy having anything to do with my family. I hate talking to my dad and I just hate..." He looked away at nothing in particular with narrowed eyes. "..._her_" He gave a heavy sigh and took one quick look back down at Zim before he let his eyes move back to the lab. "I'd rather be secluded in this mess than hang around either of them. I'm nothing like them."

Zim pointed at the lab in an 'in there?' gesture. He gave a thoughtful noise. "So." he drew out that one word before closing one eye. "What do you do in there?" He leaned his head back again to glance his one open eye at Dib.

Dib dropped his hands completely just so he could shove them in his pockets. "It's just somewhere to hang out. You can't really do much in a blown up lab." He gave a small smirk. "I tried to leave a drawing on the wall, but I think they keep trying to clean it off because every time I go back, part of it is smudged away." He moved one hand back up just to scratch at the back of his head. "I fell asleep in there one time and almost got caught. I just had to pretend I was homeless and they let me go."

Zim couldn't help but cackle into his hand. "Dib-hobo." He stepped from Dib and up to the yellow tap, clasping it a moment to look over the sight again. "Too bad it's being worked on right now. I would have made you invite me in." He glanced back at Dib as a cool wind blew by, rustling anything loose as it went by. "_Cold_ breathable atmosphere." Zim clacked his teeth together and huddled to himself, patting warmth into his arms. He tugged his skirt down, but it was too short to give any warmth, even if he was wearing pants on underneath.

"I wouldn't have let you in either way." Dib kept his eyes on Zim the entire time the shorter teen walked away. The way the other boy shivered had him looking away, trying to ignore the act as best he could. He couldn't help but look back and give out a frustrated noise when he finally gave in. He shifted his arms around so he could take off his bag, just so his jacket could follow. Much like before, he didn't bother to put his bag back on, and swung it by his side as he walked up to Zim, handing the piece of clothing over. His eyes averted as he spoke up. "Here, take it, even though it's not the warmest thing. It will still help."

Zim looked over the jacket, but eventually took it. He gave a slight smirk as he slipped the offered coat on; short sleeves, but another layer of clothing helped a little. "Do you always make angry noises when you do things?" He pulled the jacket tighter and closer, huddling into it. "Always grunting like some kind of piggy-buffalo." He turned back around to look at the wreckage. Soon it would all look like that. It was inspiring, really.

"Only when stupid people annoy me." Dib turned his eyes back on Zim. He found it strange how someone else other than himself was wearing his jacket, but quickly shrugged it off and stood next to the other teen. "I don't really see what's so interesting about all of this. Sure, it would have been much more exciting when it first happened, but right now it's just a burned down part of a lab. What do you find so amazing about it?"

"Going to tell about the eye ball kissing poem?" Zim returned Dib's questioning.

Dib shrugged his bag back on before turning around to head down the street. "If we're done, I'm going back home. You can keep the jacket. I'll get it back tomorrow." He kicked at a piece of trash that was in his way. "I'm sure you know your way home. Date over."

"Hmf! Don't even walk a girl home. No wonder you've never had a 'relationship'; you're a horrible boyfriend." Zim blew the hair from his face; aggravating and artificial- no wonder the Dib liked it. "If there even is a skool to go back to... tomorrow." He narrowed his eyes at the wreckage.


	5. Chapter 5

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 05

Everything irritated inside threw itself from Zim's throat as the doors to his underground base threw themselves open. The sound echoed the dark, dry corridors wallpapered in coils of colors from pink, purple, to silver, along with the loud stomping march of booted feet. The human known as Dib was completely vexing! Absolutely vexing! There wasn't a better word for him except: DIB. He looked, sounded, acted, smelled, and was even shaped like a '_Dib_'. Dib suited him perfectly. Dib was the perfect definition to whatever that that disgusting, wretched pile of 'you don't know me, you don't know anything about me'.

"And I will love nothing more than to send that DIB to work in some kind of janitorial public washroom service for the mighty Irken Empire. His writing's subject matter will truly be about fecal matter then! HA!" Zim yanked off and threw Dib's short sleeved jacket aside, then crashed himself down into his large crescent chair in front of the main console of his grand and masterful computer.

And right on cue, having heard his master's dolesome, Gir came skittering up with a tray of drinks and snacks on his head.

"Good. At least SOME servants know how to please Zim." He promptly popped the pink irised contact lenses from his eyes and placed them on the tray. Furiously, he rubbed his eyes; the lenses were so itchy and dried out his eyes so much. Zim huffed and yanked off his wig, tossing it at Gir, which the robot caught. "If he likes that hair so much I should just _mail_ it to him." The Irken then compulsively rubbed his head, so happy to be free of the itchies. He skritched at his antenna, laughing when it tickled. Promptly, his antenna stood up, wiggled, and stretched. Zim made a loud relieved sound, slouching back. "So, so good." He flopped back and idly pointed and unpointed his feet.

Whipping out a hand, Zim snatched a can of home-brand Irken soda, popped the top, and took a long chug. Wiping his mouth, he clunked the can on the console with loud determination. "Time to check in with my Tallest!" He pressed his hands together with a happy smile. "She will be so pleased."

A press of a few keys and the wide, grinning symbol of the Irken Empire came up, the words "ring ring ring ring" orbiting around it.

After just one more quick ring, that was cut short, the grinning symbol faded out to nothing, only to be replaced by the view of what looked to be a large control center. Many consoles were occupied by different Irken, each while some were completely empty. Wires ran through the walls, down to the floors to unknown places that couldn't be seen through the transmission. In the center of it all was a small platform where one tall chair sat. The occupant was tall herself ,with curled antenna and green armor that matched her eyes. With one, small, narrowed gaze she leaned forward in her chair before speaking her thoughts out loud. "Zim, what are you wearing?"

"W-wearing, my Tallest?" Zim blanked for a moment as he looked from hand to hand, to arm, to chest, to lap. Two days and he was already used to the sight of human clothes on his person; that was never healthy. "Oh! This? A _human_ disguise. _Fabulous_ isn't it? I made it myself." He noted the slight sparkle smear of pink on his gloves, and remembered he had pink around his eyes. He quickly rubbed the makeup away to make himself properly presentable to Tallest Miyuki. "My apologies."

"Yes, well, just be more prepared next time." Miyuki sat back, more than a bit unnerved by what she just saw, but tried her best to forget about it. "Although there shouldn't need to be a next time. Tell me, how are things progressing, Zim?" She turned a sharp glare to one of the techs that tried to eavesdrop before turning her attention back on the transmission. "What have you learned about these humans?"

Zim let a low chuckle escape his throat. "They're a third rate species with an I.Q. of jelly; and not the tasty kind. They're stupid. Very, very, very stupid." He shook his head with sad disapproval. "Their technology is not as advanced as Vortian, but it proves amusing. I'm sending what information Zim has gathered so far- now!" He pressed a button, which instantly sent what he (and the Dib) had scanned, all in a nice, neat, organized file-age. "The planet itself is mostly dirt and liquid, the human species eats away at the vegetation and builds on the left over ground, like some kind of fungus. It's really quite repulsive, my Tallest." Zim made a sour face. "They're not a civilized race at all. Their self destructive nature, actually, makes me laugh; a _lot_." He couldn't help the chuckle, but quickly stopped, clearing his throat.

Miyuki nodded to an Irken that was off screen before her eyes seemed to scan over bits of information in front of her. Her attention pulled away from the transmission just for a moment. "Very interesting and truly horrible. Such a low rate planet. I was hoping something good would come out of it, but it seems there will be nothing really salvageable." She waved an armored claw off screen and her eyes immediately went back to Zim as the information was filed away. "Maybe a few slaves, but nothing valuable. Pity, really." She moved each of her claws under her chin as her eyes narrowed. "You do have something planned for such a useless place, don't you, Zim?"

"Of course, my dearest Tallest." Zim was all proud, eager smiles. "The planet itself is just as emotionally fragile as its species. If you will look at this map of the planet's surface here." He clacked a button that brought up a small, square map of the Earth's surface on either of their viewing screens. "There are structural deformations of the planet's crust." He gestured to the bright red lines cutting through water and land alike. "Tectonic plates that leave the planet unstable, with shakes. These little pimples." He gestured to the red dots grouped near the edges of countries, while some were scattered, they were all fairly near the red lines. "These sweet spots are volcanoes. If I were to set off a few little disturbances." Several happy little pink Irken symbols plipped on screen at specific locale. "Chaos! Fire! Rumblies!" The Irken symbols glowed, setting off the lines and the plates of the Earth like puzzle pieces shifted out of place. Zim threw out his arms in victory. "Every city will fall to rubble, leaving it pathetic, defenseless, and Zim's to conquer." He cackled loudly, his shoulders shaking with the action. Quickly, he clasped his hands together. "For the Irken Empire, and you of course, my lovely Tallest."

Miyuki ran her eyes over the map and each small dot pointed out. The end result of Zim's display had her eyes opening wide for a small second, before they narrowed once more, as if the emotion never crossed her face. She turned her attention back to Zim and studied the other Irken for a few moments before leaning as far back as she could in her seat and closed her eyes. "Very nice, Zim. I am interested in knowing how long this will take you, though. You know I wish to have the operation done as quickly as possible. This plan seems like it may take you awhile. I hope that's not the case."

"Of course not." Zim quickly assured, his voice cracking some with eagerness. "A few probes sent to each locale. Should have things done by tom-" He then found his gaze aside, fallen on the crumpled black jacket that he'd thrown askew. His mouth closed, rigid teeth locking in place and he tapped them; he shouldn't be having these thoughts, procrastination was BAD. But, of all the planets this above, he hadn't laughed so hard; the planet and its people were so pathetic, one could not resist the urge to poke it with a stick and laugh. He hadn't had his fill of fun, toying with everything, yet. There was still so much to be nudged, pushed over, made fun of, tasted, eye poked and stepped on.

Zim turned his eyes back to Tallest Miyuki. "T-tom--ate..oh." He turned all of his attention back and drabbled his claws at the edge of the console. "Yes. Tamato! Er- Soon, my Tallest. I shall have my mission completed very soon." He nodded and tried to grin appropriately.

Miyuki opened her eyes at such a sudden change in wording from the other Irken on screen. It had her stay silent for a few moments, even after Zim was finished speaking. One claw tapped on an arm for a few second before she finally spoke up. "I don't like having to wait, Zim." In one small movement she stood up from the chair, although her feet failed to touch the ground. Instead, she seemed to float towards the screen that the transmission was shown on. "Everything is running smoothly isn't it? I hope there are no problems that are holding you up." An antenna twitched at the mere thought.

"No! No problems, my Tallest." Zim shook his head and his hands. "I'll have the humans subdued as quickly as can be done." He nodded firmly with a crooked smile, his antennae falling back.

"Excellent." The word almost purred from Miyuki's lips as she calmed completely. "I am curious now." With those words, she turned her back on the screen, and instead focused on one of the techs. "You have been watching these humans I take it? You say they are stupid and destructive? I wish to know more about them, though, if I am to take them as slaves. Will they really be of any use to me?" She turned back around to give Zim her attention once more. "Tell me."

"I have personally used one for my own gain, little did they know that it was for their own planet's demise." Zim took a moment to chuckle meanly at the Dib; poor, stupid, naive Dib. Stupid, stupid. "Like any stupid animal, they can easily be easily subdued and trained to do tedious, repetitive, labor. As long as they are kept from fire, and dangerous explodey devices, I'm sure they will make excellent slaves for my Tallest." Zim shrugged out his hands with confidence. "Soon you will have crawling humans with tables strapped to their backs, serving you sweet carbonated beverages." He folded his hands together, giving a winning grin. "It's all just a matter of time."

"You are using one to get what you want?" This information seemed to surprise Miyuki at first, and had her moving closer to the screen once more. "They are really so ignorant?" For a few moments she stood where she was, until she couldn't contain her laughter. "That's simply amazing, Zim! To think that they have no idea what is going on, and are even helping you accomplish such things." She tried to get herself under control, but a few small snickers still escaped. "I can't remember the last time we ever tried to conquer such a stupid race of beings. This must be the first."

Zim's smile could only broaden with Tallest Miyuki's compliments and laughter, a few chuckles escaped him too. "It really was quite brilliant. The fools." he complimented himself, completely pleased. "My human servant has ties to a highly revered scientist of the city I reside in. But seeing the technology he, or any scientist, has doesn't seem worth the capture. Unless you want something to prod with an electric poking stick." Zim chuckled loosely again. "They _really_ are quite stupid."

Miyuki's amusement seemed to completely stop at Zim's sudden information. "The human has ties to someone important?" She glanced away from the screen for a few moments, and kept in her own thoughts. The only real sounds were those that the techs made as they worked. Only after a few tense moments did she finally speak up again. "You have asked this..." She twirled a claw around as she thought of a word. "..._slave_ of yours about any important technology he may know about?" She finally turned narrowed eyes back on Zim. "Anything you may not have been able to retrieve?"

Zim's antenna perked at the question before they lowered again. He shook his head and gave a heavy sigh, lowering his head some; Dib smart? No. "Unfortunately, my Tallest, he's as daft as the rest of them. But I will look into it, and gather as much information as I can. I will then send my findings next time I report in."

Miyuki's good attitude seemed to take a complete turn with such an answer. "I suppose that's fine." With those few words, she moved away from the screen just so she could sit back down. Her eyes closed once she was settled, and her head rested on a claw. "You did well with the information you have brought me, for now. I still wish for more, though." She gave a long, drawn out sigh and drummed her claws on her cheek. "Either way, if all goes well, you shall be rewarded, Zim. You have never failed the empire before. I'm sure you won't start now."

Zim nodded. "Of course, my Tallest. I will, my Tallest. Thank you, my Tallest." He grinned his ridged teeth wide. "Until then, my Tallest."

Miyuki gave a small quick nod of her own. "Zim..." She turned her eyes to an Irken off screen and in a few quick seconds, the transmission was cut.


	6. Chapter 6

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 06

Lockers slammed closed one by one, and the warning bell rang, causing each student still in the hall to panic. Through it all, Dib stayed calm, letting everyone pass by him as he shoved what he didn't need into his own locker. The talk from the last couple of days had died down a bit as people got bored with the rumors, but some of it was still floating around, just enough to get on his nerves.

After just a few more minutes, Dib finally shut his locker and slung his bag back over his shoulder. Instead of heading towards class, his feet took him towards the office, which held a place he dreaded. He was grateful for the silence of the walk, having no Zim to bother him, and at the same time, a little surprised the other teen hadn't hung all over him right when he came through the skool doors.

"Whatever, probably got lost on his way here." The words left Dib's mouth as he stopped in front of the wooden door that would take him inside the counselor's office. With a heavy sigh, he lifted a hand and knocked.

"Come in, Dib!" an ever so energetic and cheerful voice shouted from the inside.

That voice had Dib cringing before he dropped his hand to turn the knob on the door. With one quick twist, he opened the door to let himself into the familiar setting, closing the door quietly after. Without even speaking, he did his normal routine of dropping his bag by the door. After that, he didn't move an inch except for placing his hands in his pockets and looking anywhere but at the other figure in the room.

"Now, now, Dib. You've been here long enough to not be a stranger. Come." The counselor gestured to the usual seat before him. "Sit. Tell me how you are feeling." He pressed his hands together on his desk, voice oh-so-pleasant and perky.

With those words, Dib finally walked forward and took a seat. As soon as he sat, he immediately slouched down until half his body was nearly off the bottom of the chair. The entire time he kept his eyes averted, even as he started speaking. "I'll tell you the same thing I always tell you each time I come in here. I feel like this is just a waste of time and that you're stupid for even asking." He finally turned narrowed eyes on the man in the room.

The man briefly closed his eyes to nod as he listened. "I see." He leaned forward in his chair, furrowing his thick brows as he looked Dib's expression over. "Are you sad Dib? You look particularly sad today. Is there something bothering you?" The counselor tilted his head in a sympathetic fashion. "Is someone bullying you? Hurting you? How are things at home? Tell me what's bothering you." He reached over and grabbed a green alien squeaky toy stress reliever. He gave it an idle squeeze and its eyes bugged out.

"Nothing's..." Dib was about to continue on with his usual words, but stopped. He suddenly didn't feel like repeating himself for once. Instead, he gave the strange toy that the other held a long look. After a few moments, he clacked his tongue piercing against his teeth a couple of times before looking down at his feet and finally answering. "It's not really that important, Mister Dwicky. Just normal skool stuff."

"Of course it's important, Dib. It's obviously making you upset." The counselor gave the toy a few more squeezes, making the eyes pop out with each. "Talking about it will make you feel better. Take the weight off your shoulders. So share. Share with me the real problem." Mister Dwicky folded his hands together, the alien toy sandwiched between palms. He tilted his head in a concerned fashion. "Tell me what's bothering you, Dib."

Dib lifted his eyes once more. "That's what you always say." He let out a harsh sigh after he spoke and started to kick at the desk. It would have been easy for him to tell the other that he was being manipulated by the new student. That Zim was the one making his life even more miserable. Those weren't the exact words that left him, though. "I've been hanging around the transfer student, Zim."

"Ah." Mister Dwicky nodded affirmatively. "And how is the new student adjusting? What's he like?" He smiled widely, much too widely at Dib. "It's good to hear you're finally making a friend. Very good. So what's troubling you then?"

Dib rolled his eyes at all the questions, especially the first two. "He's adjusting just fine. I had to show him around the skool." He finally rested his foot back down and moved up a bit in the chair. "It was annoying at first, but it didn't turn out so bad, I guess." Without really realizing it, one of his hands fell to his stomach to fiddle with his piercing. "He's really clingy and he's very lewd. He's so weird." Dib blinked his eyes and looked down as he finally realized what he was doing and quickly stopped himself. He let his hand drop back down and looked away, more than embarrassed. "Nothing is troubling me."

The alien toy gave a squeak as it was squeezed again between the counselor's hands, its eyes bugging far from its face. "Weird? Weird how?" Mister Dwicky seemed to ask very carefully.

"Weird like-- I don't know." Dib shrugged his shoulders before going on. "I bugged him a couple of times to tell me where he was from because he has this weird, green skin, but he wouldn't really tell me." He turned his eyes back on the toy Mister Dwicky was holding. "He did tell me the skin thing was some kind of birth mark. Some kind of family thing, I think." He narrowed his eyes a bit. "Does it really matter?"

The counselor's eyes snapped wide with the new squeak of the rubber toy in his hands, his eyes bugging out to almost rival that of the alien he held. Slowly, his lips peeled from perfectly white teeth into a wide, anxious smile. "Green skin, you say? My, that is unusual. Very unusual. Very, very, very, very, _very_ unusual." Mister Dwicky started squeezing the alien toy at intervals. "Is there anything else very unusual about your Zim friend?"

Dib shut one eye closed in annoyance at the squeaking. "Not really. I'm just helping him with an essay right now. I haven't really been able to get to know him that much." He finally turned his attention back up to Mister Dwicky and blinked his eyes. The sudden look on the other's face had him feeling a little uneasy. Although the man wasn't known for being the sanest person in the skool, Dib was still getting used to that fact. "Yeah, that's pretty much all I know."

"A transfer student this late in the year... seems a bit _unusual_." Mister Dwicky looked down at the alien toy for a moment before raising his analyzing gaze on Dib. "What about how this new student talks? Does he say strange things that have no real meaning? Does he have any extra appendages, or is there anything unusual about him physically aside from the green skin... that doesn't seem _normal_?" The counselor's eyes grew widest at the last word.

"Of course he talks weird. He's a transfer student. He's probably from a different country." Dib had almost shouted the words back at the other and it had him shaking his head to try and calm himself down. "There's nothing wrong with him. He's got two arms, two legs, and a head." He moved down further in the chair, suddenly wanting to be invisible. He didn't know why he was getting so upset. Mister Dwicky could have asked about Zim all he wanted. It really shouldn't have mattered. "You're looking too far into this."

"There's only _one_ explanation for what's making you so miserable Dib.." Mister Dwicky looked about shifty eyed before settling his eyes on the other with knowing in his narrowed beady eyes.

Dib raised a brow and tried to stay calm, but at the same time, it was obvious that the other's attitude was making him a little nervous. "I'm going to hate myself for asking this." He just barely leaned forward to make it seem as if he were interested. "What, oh great and wise counselor, is making me miserable?"

"Zim -- IS AN **_ALIEN_**!" Mister Dwicky rose fast to his feet, his chair toppling back, and thrusted the green alien squeak toy in Dib's face; it gave a little squeak. "He's using his powers of mind control to.,. uhhh.., make you feel bad! I've read about this before."

Dib moved his hand up to push the toy, which was invading his personal space, aside. "And you're a crackpot." He leaned back in the chair once more and kept his gaze pinned on the other. "Weren't you talking to me last month about how you thought the janitor was some kind of vampire or something?" He crossed his arms over his chest. "Did you get bored of that?"

Mister Dwicky pointed with the hand that still held the squeak toy. "He IS a vampire! I have proof!... he just, uh, flushed it." He stood back. "But this time I'm sure. Zim is an alien! Green skin._ Green_ skin? He probably has you doing his dirty work.. For his 'essay'? No, world domination! And making you depressed at the same time." He leaned forward again, his brows furrowing. "Do you _cut_ yourself Dib? ..When you're sad."

Dib narrowed his eyes at Mister Dwicky. "You're a moron." He kept his heated gaze on the man for a few moments until he finally looked away and continued speaking. "You believe in such stupid things. You have no proof that Zim has any plans for whatever world domination. You're so secluded in your own little world that you think up the craziest and most bizarre things and throw a fit over the first thing you deem not normal." Dib's expression changed and his eyes fell to the floor. "Zim is just Zim."

The counselor fell back into his chair and breathed a heavy sigh. "He's gotten to you. It won't be long now. His alien buddies will come down and swoop in their flying saucers and wipe out human civilization." He squeaked the alien toy a few times before setting his hand down. "Crop circles! Cow abduction! Alien probing! Clowns! Missing people! I've seen it all. Well.. on Mysterious Mysteries. But it's real! It has to be. You're living proof that Zim is an alien: the depression, the anti-social disorder, the clothing, the piercings, the innate need to write sad stuff. It's all because of the _aliens_."

Dib looked back at the other with an open mouth. For a few moments all he could actually do was stare until his eyes narrowed and he finally formed words. "Excuse me. In case you were somewhere else for every session we had, I've been like this since before Zim transferred here." He gave a small huff before looking away once more. "You're going to have to find some other excuse, but you're still insane either way."

Mister Dwicky opened his mouth, but Dib had a point, so he closed it. He set the little green squeaky alien down on his desk so he could fold his hands together, and once again that wide, cheerful smile was back on his face, as if Dib had just stepped through the door again. "Alright then, Dib. So, then what's really troubling you?"

Much like before, Dib took awhile to answer, while focusing on the floor. His expression was tense as he tried to find the words to explain things. "I hate when people touch me, and I hate touching people. You know that. Just the thought of either makes me sick." He shifted around so that he could pull one leg up on the chair. "Zim wouldn't leave me alone on his first day. I kept telling him not to touch me, but he wouldn't stop. Of course it bugged me a lot, and in the end I got so aggravated that I yelled at him and stormed off." He shook his head and buried his face against his knee. "We got to talking though, and he was still annoying, but not half as bad as before. As the day went on, I just didn't realize things. It was like I didn't care or wasn't thinking about all the contact like I usually do. Only when I really realized what I was doing, did it matter."

Mister Dwicky blinked, rather surprised. He rubbed his chin and goatee rather thoughtfully over what Dib had told him. "So, what you're saying is: you don't mind it when you touch Zim? And vice versa?"

"I guess." Dib gave an annoyed sigh before he tried to explain himself again. "I still hate it. I don't like when it happens, and when I notice that either of us is doing it, I try to stop it." He blinked his eyes as he realized how wrong that could sound. The thought caused a blush to come to his cheeks, which he tried to hide against his knee. "I hate this."

"Well I wouldn't touch him anyway, Dib." The counselor leaned back in his chair. "He's an alien. You don't know where he's been. Or what he's done." He blinked and pointed "Or what he _can_ do. Maybe, because he's an extraterrestrial being, not human, you don't mind the touch as much. Still, don't touch Zim anymore, Dib." He wagged a no-no finger.

Dib raised a brow at what Mister Dwicky said. "Isn't a counselor supposed to encourage such a change in behavior?" He sat up straight and let his leg fall back down. One of his hands rose so that it could rest again his chest, his voice mocking as he spoke. "Good boy, Dib. That's very good. You should touch Zim more often." He let his hand fall back down and gave a low snort as he looked back to the man with narrowed eyes. "Something just as stupid and pathetic as that?"

Mister Dwicky furrowed his brow and he leaned toward the desk again. "You're very angry, Dib. Is everything alright at home? You father? Your sister is doing very well for herself this year."

Dib blinked his eyes once before he quickly narrowed them in anger. His hands tightened around the edges of the chair as he spoke up. "It's amusing that you actually think I care." With those words, he looked away before answering the questions that had been asked of him. "Everything is the same as it always is. Dad is still sucking up to his boss. Nothing has changed."

"You wouldn't be angry, Dib, if you didn't care." Mister Dwicky tapped his fingers together, his eyes flicking to the toy alien before looking back to Dib. "Let's think this over, Dib. What would _you_ like to change? What would make _you_ happy? Is there anything that is making you happy right now? Big things. Small things. Any things."

For once, Dib thought over what was asked of him, instead of brushing the questions off. His nails tapped lightly against the edge of the chair and finally he spoke quietly. "I was happy yesterday. For a few minutes, I was actually happy." A sudden scowl came to his face and his eyes lowered a bit. "Then it was all ruined just as quickly." He stayed silent for awhile after that before he barely turned his eyes on Mister Dwicky. "It's none of your business, though."

"I'm not prying, Dib, I'm just concerned for your well being. As are we all." Mister Dwicky unfolded his hands to gesture. "That's why you're here, so that you feel better about yourself and are happy. Now, if we can pinpoint what exactly makes you happy, we can move past all your troubles, and you can live out a normal, healthy life." He re-clasped his hands together. "Then you wouldn't have to have these sessions anymore."

"I'm here because people _are_ prying." Dib glared hard at the man for only a few seconds before he looked back down. "I don't need anyone to be concerned about me. You can keep trying to talk any kind of sense you want into me, it's not going to work." He moved his foot out to once again kick at the desk, sick of the silence in the room. "If I have to keep coming here because I refuse to listen to you, then, oh well."

Mister Dwicky took a hold of the toy again and gave it a squeeze, it squeaked, bugging its eyes out. "You skipped skool yesterday."

Dib flinched back as if the words had actually harmed him. "Yeah, well, Zim was curious about the library in the city." He shrugged his shoulders as if there was nothing wrong with such a thing. "I took him there and figured it was no big deal. He needed research for his essay anyway. Some of the stuff here in the skool just isn't all that up to date." He kicked the desk a little harder. "So what?"

"You took the alien to our city's library..." Mister Dwicky frowned considerably. "Your grades are already suffering as is, Dib. I'm sure you want to go on to hi-skool, let alone pass onto the next grade. You have to stop dragging your feet." But something else caused the counselor to do a double take. "Yesterday? So, something with Zim made you happy yesterday?" One plus one is one on a bun.

Dib grit his teeth. He really needed to learn when to keep his mouth shut. He never used to be so open around his counselor. His mind was starting to get mixed up. "Yeah, so?" He dropped his foot back down suddenly and kept his eyes on his boot.

"So what made you happy?" Mister Dwicky pressed on. "Was it going to the library with a friend? Spending time together? Being able to relax, be yourself? What was it, Dib, that made you happy?"

"I don't know. It doesn't matter. None of it matters." Dib tried his best to straighten up in the chair, but in the end, he was still just as slouched. "It was a once in a lifetime thing. You act like you expect something like it to happen again. Well, it's not going to." He had never wished so badly that a session would be over with. "You expect way too much either way."

"No. I only expect things to get better. For the world to see what I see, and know what I know. And soon--" Mister Dwicky pointed dynamically to the ceiling "the world will open its eyes to the truth! I will expose life's mysteries, and all will be at peace. For-- stuff will be solved. Hm. Yea." He lowered his hand back down and folded his hands once more on his desk. "Is there anything you'd like to talk about, Dib? Get off your chest?" The counselor smiled pleasantly once more.

Dib stared at Mister Dwicky for a few moments after his speech. He didn't realize until that moment how completely out of it the guy really was. Only being able to see him once a month didn't give him much of a chance, and Dib never paid much attention to all the gossip that went around skool. It couldn't hurt to mess with the guy's head a little more could it? Dib gave only a small smirk before he leaned forward in the chair just so he could rest his arms on the desk, his chin following. "Your _alien_ kissed me yesterday." He failed to mention the stunt he had pulled the day before that, but Mister Dwicky had only asked about when he skipped skool.

Mister Dwicky leaned back very quickly in his chair and completely blanched. He stared at Dib, not completely sure of what to make of that. "That's... quite.. disturbing.. progress, Dib." He dead panned completely. "Yeap."

Dib raised a brow at such a response. "Really?" He leaned back in the chair, taking his arms off the desk in the process and letting them drop back down. "I thought my anti-social behavior was one of the reasons I'm here?" He narrowed his eyes on Mister Dwicky. "Shouldn't you be glad that I let Zim get so close to me? I'm letting someone near me finally." He finally looked away, but his expression was still the same. "You people confuse me."

"Well, I don't know, that all depends if you want to carry an alien child in your stomach or not." Mister Dwicky shrugged loosely. "Child birth must be messy." He shook his head. "But that doesn't excuse your absence yesterday, Dib. We've been trying to get a hold of your father, but he seems very busy. He's lucky to have such an important and steady job working for the Professor. Although I know it keeps him away from home." He tapped his fingers together. "Have you thought about what you want to do once you're finished skool?"

The first few things Mister Dwicky said caused Dib to immediately stand up and slam his hands on the desk. "You..." All he could do was let that one word slip from his lips as he glared hard at the man. His hands clenched every few seconds against the hard wood, and it didn't take long for him to realize what he was doing. He blinked his eyes and stood completely still before he sat back down, letting his eyes fall on his boots. He tried his best to act as if that one small incident had never happened by answering the one question he was asked. "Not really."

Mister Dwicky blinked hard several times, and slowly leaned forward from pressing his back against the chair. He furrowed his brows as he eyed Dib for a moment, but Dib's tantrum had seemed to have passed, and so things were back on their tracks again. "Any ideas at all? Going to go help your father in the labs? It's good work, that Real Science, it is. Pays well. Better than some." He looked about completely shifty eyed.

Dib gave a snort at such an idea. "Help at that place? I'd rather live on the street as a hobo." He shook his head a bit before raising a hand to play with one of the chains on his shirt. "Everyone that works there is a walking zombie. They do the professor's bidding and don't have minds of their own. I refuse to be like that." He let his hand fall back down. "I could care less about pay."

"I know you don't." The counselor tacked on with random empathy. "wait-- did you say-_zombie_?" His eyes bugged out. "Anyway, you should keep an open mind about that. Graduation isn't as far as you think. You have the rest of your life ahead of you." He glanced at his watch. "It's nearing the end, and I know you have classes to go to. Is there anything else you'd like to talk about?"

Dib only gave the smallest sigh of relief that the session was coming to a close. Instead of answering, he stood up from the chair and barely gave a stretch before walking over to the door and picking his bag back up. He slung the beat up backpack over his shoulder, finally speaking up. "I think you're the one that needs the counseling, not me." He let his eyes travel back to Mister Dwicky while he leaning heavily on the door.

But the counselor was busy too writing things on an open file, most likely Dib's, to hear the other's comment. "You've made progress Dib. Albeit thanks to alien technology, but progress none-the-less. You should feel much better now. I'll be seeing you next month, same day, same time." He paused to give a wide smile. "Have a good day."

Dib kept his eyes on Mister Dwicky for a few more minutes. Finally, his hand moved to twist the knob on the door just so he could let himself out. He made his anger known by slamming the door closed behind, not caring at all what damage it would have caused, if any. He didn't even give the office a second glance before he was on his way back down the hall.


	7. Chapter 7

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 07

The cafeteria was usually packed full of starved students ready to get away from early morning classes. At the moment, it was still too soon for the students to fill the giant room. Only a few lingering students sat at tables in the far back, conversing with each other instead of going to class. The head lunch lady didn't really care what went on, and instead always ignored the random teenagers.

All of this was just fine with Dib as he sat at one of the tables off to the side. As soon as he had left Mister Dwicky's office, he went straight to the cafeteria. He was in a foul mood, and being around teachers wouldn't help. Like many times before, he drowned everything out with his music while he doodled in his notebook. All he could draw, though, were little disfigured aliens, each with a big head and buggy eyes. After the final one, he dropped his pencil, giving up and looking out the window with a defeated sigh.

"Those look like olives with legs." A thin arm, with one too many belts, slipped over Dib's shoulder to nab the pencil. "Let Zim try." A hand rested on Dib's shoulder so the other could lean over and scribble a rather deformed pear-shaped object with fat lips, dotted eyes, and tentacle limbs. "I think… that's what you call…" Zim leaned back on his feet and tapped the eraser against his lips, "-a zucchini or a persimmon. I bet it's a pomegranate. Those are messed up fruits. Bananas are creepy. Peel the skin and eat the tasty, mashy, innards." He stuck out his tongue in disgust.

Dib had moved his headphones down as soon as he felt the touch on his shoulder. His eyes immediately went down to the paper, but his attention was on the other's words. "Well, I was trying to draw an alien. I think you succeeded in creating more of a monster." He moved his hand up to steal the pencil back. "Fruits look much more appealing than that." With those words, he began to do a quick drawing of a banana. "See, I think yours has more of a creepy factor." It was obvious he was teasing.

"But Zim screams when you eat it. And wiggles all the way down." Zim took the pencil again and leaned over. "See. Your papaya is so boring. Eating it would be no fun. Put a few eyes on it." He drew at least eight wiggly eyes on Dib's doodle. "Maybe a few teethy mouths." He added three grinning mouths. "Oh- and some wigglies." He then added several tentacles. "There! Now that's an adventure for your organs. If you don't eat it, then it will eat you. Uh, at least three times." Zim grinned and pointed the pencil at all three mouths.

"Alright then." Dib took the pencil back from Zim and started to doodle once more. He tried his best to copy both of Zim's creations, and when he was done they were both facing each other in some form of battle stance. He then started to draw some random person in the middle of both, screaming at the top of their lungs. "What if everyone refused to eat them? Doesn't that mean they would end up eating everyone on Earth? What would they do then? Eat each other?"

"Oh! Oh! I know!" Zim snatched the pencil. "They would round up the people of Earth." He drew a bunch of people that looked like blob gingerbread men. "And put them in a factory." He drew a house over them, a little chimney with some smoke coming out. "And breed them like livestock. But at the same time, they'd make them work in that factory, processing people into yummy bagged snacks." Zim then drew a round fruit with two big eyes, some legs, a crown, and a whip. "It would be a well organized way to rule the planet." He grinned. "And they'd never go hungry. Hurray for free labor done by your own food. Their payment is the end of their suffering." Zim nodded sagely.

Dib looked over Zim's small diagram before he finally shook his head. He rested his chin on his arm, letting the conversation go and allowing the other teen to keep the pencil. "I'm scared at how much sense you try to make sometimes." That was the only thing he really said about any of it before he glanced back at Zim out the corner of his eyes. "How did you find me anyway? I didn't even think you were coming to Skool today since you weren't hanging on me when I first got here."

Zim knelt on the chair beside Dib, continuing to doodle his mayhem of crazy fruits and veggies taking over the world and enslaving mankind. "Hmm. I couldn't find you when I got here. You didn't go to class. So, since I knew you have a habit of hiding in dark, dank, lonely places, I thought to myself: 'Zim, if I were a Dib, where would that be?' So I looked here." He looked up from his drawing. "And there you are." He pointed the pencil at Dib. "I think I'm going to draw a killer pita bread next." Zim stuck his tongue out in concentration as he drew on. "Uwww! He has laser vision!"

Dib dropped his eyes back down while one of his hands moved out to fidget with a buckle on Zim's arm. "I had to see the counselor. A monthly visit kind of thing. He checks up on me, we talk about nothing important, then I leave." His eyes fell halfway closed. "It was only a little different this time. He started getting really annoying." He left it at that, and continued to watch Zim draw, letting go of the buckle so he could point at the paper. "Make that one breathe fire."

"Fire shoooting out of its mouth!" Zim added vast amounts of flames coming from the monster veggie. He added a few gooey people caught on fire, and cackled as he wrote their little screamy words, imitating their voices as he drew. "You wished Zim would help you! But I shall never! Never!" He cackled as he drew more human blobs on fire. Pausing a moment in his fun, he realized something and glanced to the buckle before looking to the actual Dib. "What does a counselor do?"

Dib moved his eyes up to meet Zim's own. "You don't know?" He didn't wait for the other teen to answer, and instead shifted around so both his arms were better rested under his head. "A counselor is someone that helps people with their problems. They talk to them and ask them what's wrong. Constantly." He rolled his eyes. "They aren't satisfied until they _think_ a person is happy."

Zim chewed on the pencil's eraser but soon found that essence of graphite is not a good taste. He made a face and wiped his tongue on the back of his gloved hand. Smacking his lips a few times, he tried to act like he never did it. "So what is your problems that needs the assistance of a counselor? Can't you just get a new... uh... replacement for what's broken? Isn't a happy cheap?"

Dib raised his head to stare at Zim, as if the other teen had sprouted tentacles and was shooting lasers like the fruit in the drawings. When he spoke, it was obvious how completely nuts he thought the other was. "You're kidding, right?"

"I know what you need." Zim sat on his legs in the chair and handed Dib the pencil. "Draw Zim!" He made the pencil dance. "That will make _everything_ better." The green boy grinned animatedly.

Dib took the pencil back and sat up completely. His eyes moved over Zim and seemed as if he was going to protest, but he easily gave in, dragging his notebook off the table to rest on his lap. He flipped to a page that wasn't covered in pictures of man-eating fruit. "You have to stay still. You can't move around like you always do."

Zim couldn't help but squirm in his kneeling position. "How should Zim pose? Something that shows off his amazingness." He raised his arms muscleman style, turning his head this way and that. "No. How about. Uh." He stood up and placed his hands on his hips, going for something more heroic, then shook his head. He put one foot on the bench, but the trooper look wasn't doing it either. With a huff, he stepped from the bench to sit on the table, fidgeting with hands. Quickly, he clasped them and sat up straight. Zim gave a defeated sigh. "I can't choose. All of Zim is just so great it cannot be put into just one pose." His frown was more of a moody pout.

"It's good to know you think so highly of yourself." Dib watched Zim move around. Instead of getting aggravated, he found it amusing. In the end, he couldn't help the small smirk at how defeated the other teen looked. "Here, I've got an idea." He set his notebook and pencil aside on the table as he stood up to move in front of the other.

One hand reached out to just barely touch Zim's leg and bring it over the other. Once that was done, Dib had to almost step on the bench so he could be face to face with the shorter teen. His hands moved down and grabbed Zim's, pulling them behind the boy's body to rest on the table, causing him to lean back. The act only caused Dib to lean forward into Zim's personal space, which he realized right after. He blinked and immediately let go of Zim's hands so he could reach up and flick the boy's hair back. "Just like this."

Zim blinked slowly in subdued surprise. "Oh." His lips stayed pursed a moment. ".. I remember this." He shifted so he was leaning back more comfortably on one hand, letting the other free to brush aside the few stray hairs that covered Dib's brow piercing, so he could give it a curious touch. "I like this…" Zim looked from the piercing back to Dib's face.

Dib's eyes slipped halfway closed at the small touch. Even when Zim looked at him, all he gave was a small 'hmm'. It was when his own hand dropped back down did he finally realize what was going on, and his eyes snapped open. He backed away from Zim and the table before quickly moving back to where he had been sitting before, and trying his best to forget what had just happened.

"Just stay like that." There was annoyance in his voice, and even after he picked his notebook and pencil back up, it didn't seem like he would start drawing any time soon.

Zim had set his hand back down behind him to lean more comfortably on them. He couldn't help but tap his foot at the air. The motion was lazy, and Dib didn't seem to be drawing, so it seemed alright for the moment. He watched Dib, tilting his head, curious to why the other didn't draw right away. But Zim didn't say anything.

Dib tapped his pencil a few times, as if that would help him get his thoughts in order. If anything, it only made him more aggravated. After a few moments, he gave a frustrated noise and threw the notebook, aside causing it to slide down the table. The pencil was soon to follow. "I don't understand you." He rested his head back down on the table and stared out the window, refusing to look Zim's way. "You show up here and hang all over me. You demand things from me. Yesterday, you kissed me while almost begging for me not to leave you alone." He finally turned his eyes on Zim. "I don't get it. What's wrong with you?"

Zim blinked, uncrossing his legs. Sitting up, he narrowed one eye as he stared at Dib as if he were now the man-eating tentacle fruit. He gave a clueless and puzzled 'Huh?'

"I've never seen anyone act the way you do." Dib narrowed his eyes before turning them back to the window. "At least, not anyone here in skool. I'm sure there's no one in the city as well." His frustration was let out in a harsh sigh. "Like I told my counselor, you're so weird. I never realize I'm doing anything around you until the last minute, and I hate it." He turned his gaze back on Zim, but his expression was calm. "Why couldn't you just be like everyone else and leave me alone?"

Zim slowly closed his mouth and his shoulders sagged. He frowned a little. He didn't think he was doing anything wrong. "All Zim did was ask you to draw him... If you really didn't want to, you could have said no."

Dib raised his head and blinked. Zim's words surprised him for a second, considering he had gotten used to the other's lewd and loud behavior. After a few seconds, he moved his eyes back to the notebook before reaching his hand out to grab it and the pencil. "If I do this, hopefully it will be a better picture than last time, since I actually have you sitting in front of me." He looked the other over while holding the pencil over the paper. "Sit just like you were before."

It was Zim's turn to narrow his eyes. "You don't understand me? I don't understand you, Dibness." But he shrugged it off and moved back to his original pose. Vanity got the better of him. He looked out the window, trying to see what Dib kept looking out at. There were planet life forms, green, brown, nothing horribly exciting; a few noisy birds that picked at the garbage cans. "You talked about Zim to this counselor?"

"Yeah, I ended up talking to him about the past couple of days." Dib had taken one last long glance at Zim before he finally started sketching. "He asked me about you, so I told him. It was stupid because, based on what I said, he now thinks of you as some kind of alien bent on world domination while mind controlling me into becoming depressed." He kept his eyes on the paper and there was a small smirk on his lips at how ridiculous everything sounded. "Crazy, don't you think?"

Zim's eyes snapped wide open and completely turned around. He looked from one way to the other, to the ceiling and back at Dib. Slowly, his eyes shifted half shut and a lazy smile pressed on his face, a lazy laugh soon to follow. "Completely." Zim's entirety became relaxed and he tapped at the air with a foot, just to appease the part of him that wanted to move around. "And this 'counsel of lor' is suppose to i _help_ /i you? Too amusing. I think you'd get better counseling from a potato masher, or toaster."

"No kidding." Dib reached his foot out to touch the tip of Zim's to stop the other's tapping. "I told you to stay still. I can't draw you if you're moving even an inch. It's annoying." He dropped his foot down and raised his eyes a bit before moving them back down to the paper. "I really wish I didn't have to visit him anymore. I guess once a month isn't so bad, though. As long as I give him whatever information he wants, he leaves me alone otherwise." He gave a small shrug. "If he starts bugging you, just ignore him. That's what everyone else does, I think."

Zim pursed his lips and scowled. "But... you aren't even looking at Zim all the time." But he let it slide for the greater good of being drawn. Instead, he concentrated on not going stark raving mad sitting in one spot; completely still. So Zim preoccupied himself with his other liberty, his specialty; bugging the Dib. "How far done are you? Can Zim see? Zim should get a special every minute preview." Zim blinked, his other liberty. "What if you didn't go? What would happen? Would they track you down and force you to tell them all you know? Would planets collide? Your sun explode? Uwwww." Zim almost went starry eyed. "Would they _execute_ you?"

Dib looked up at the other teen with an aggravated expression. "You ask too many questions." He looked back down and went back to work while shaking his head. "I'm not letting you look at it until I'm completely done. Be glad I'm letting you look at it at all. I told you before that I hate letting anyone see anything I do. It just feels like an invasion of privacy." He stopped for a second to tap the pencil on the paper as his eyes scanned the drawing. "As for what you asked about my counselor, personally, I have no clue what they would do if I didn't go. More than likely, they would just call my dad and let him know."

The green boy tilted his head, not sated. "Then what?"

Dib turned his eyes back on Zim and kept them there for a few moments. Only when he spoke up did he finally start sketching once more. "He would more than likely just lecture me about skipping out on my sessions. He thinks they're important for me. That they will somehow get me out of the _mood_ I'm in." A small scowl came to his face. "Funny how he never thought it was important until the skool actually talked to him about it."

Zim nodded, but then quickly stilled, considering he shouldn't be moving at all. "Have you ever seen inside the labs?" The question seemed to come from no where. "Aside from the chaos you showed me yesterday." He drummed his fingers on the table, then quickly stopped; it was tough to sit still.

Dib shook his head at the question. "Nope. Not at all." His hand pressed the pencil harder on the paper. "I never wanted to go inside there, and I'm not allowed to anyway. Dad told me that most of the stuff there is top secret. The only time it's not, is if the professor actually makes a big announcement telling everyone about the next big invention he's created, and ready to make use of it." He gave another small shrug. "I don't really see what the big deal is about any of it."

Zim watched the other for a moment; more specifically, the pencil. "Technology is power." He blinked a few times, realizing just how open and fluid that comment was.

"Yeah, no kidding." Dib let out a small snort before he went on, his eyes on the paper the entire time. "People get a small taste of something they think is amazing and then suddenly they want more and more. Now look at this place; everyone thinks that one simple person is the greatest thing that ever happened." He shook his head. "It's stupid. He could reinvent a paperclip, give it a new, fancy name, and people would call him brilliant."

"What he creates isn't so brilliant?" Zim internally tsked; well, that was a disappointment. Still, it wouldn't hurt to capture this 'Professor'. But there was still time. Oooodles.

"Not really. Most of the people in the city think so, but to me it's all just junk that anyone with a brain can create." Dib brought the pencil away from the paper once again so he could raise it up near his lips. "The city is mostly powered by whatever the professor creates. If he invents something better than what the city is using at the time to store water, or something just as stupid, then we obviously use that instead." He finally tossed his pencil aside and raised nervous eyes up to Zim. "You can move around now. I'm done."

Zim uncrossed his legs and crawled over on the table with quite an elated happy noise. "Show me! Let me loook! Let me seeeee." He placed a hand on Dib's shoulder to peer at the drawing.

Dib clutched the drawing to his chest out of habit as soon as Zim tried to look. He dropped his eyes down to his hands, which were nervously twitching on the back of the notebook. After only a small sigh did he finally let go of the book and turn it around for the green teen to see. "Screw it. I'm just delaying the inevitable."

On the paper was a sketched out version of Zim in the exact same pose he had been in moments before. Unlike the other drawing days before, this version looked cleaner and much more realistic. Although, there were a few bad smudges where Dib's hand had moved across the paper every now and then.

Zim took the sides of the book to pull it closer and get a better look at the drawing. He sat back on his knees and turned the drawing this way and that. He pulled it further away and looked taken aback. "Is... decent." The green boy sounded surprised. "Is actually--_good_." Zim looked at Dib in almost absolute shock. "You actually did something _goodly_!" He turned the drawing around to show Dib, as if the boy hadn't seen it himself. "It conveys the awesome awesomeness that is Zim! Well, almost. The real Zim is more amazing than this drawing." Zim turned it around to rest the book on his lap. "But I like it." He tilted his head and placed a hand on his own cheek. "I _do_ have nice legs, don't I."

Dib blinked his eyes a few times and stared at Zim, as if he hadn't heard the other boy correctly. It was strange to hear actual praise come from the other's mouth. At least any sort of praise towards Dib, himself. And to have it directed towards something he was sensitive about was even more unreal. His eyes dropped down to the beaten notebook in Zim's lap before moving back up to the other teen. Dib moved up out of his seat and rested his hands on either side of Zim's legs before he closed the gap between them and barely pressed his lips against the other's.

Zim was taken aback, not expecting such a reaction from just a little praise. His pause didn't last long. He pressed his lips back against Dib's with little hesitation. His hand on his own cheek then drawing to Dib's , moving until claws could curl around the other's ear, toying with the piercings there.

As soon as Dib felt the small touches against his ear he easily leaned his head towards the other's hand. Having Zim press into the kiss made him give in and cause the kiss to become just a bit harder. It didn't last long though before he was pulling back to stare at Zim for a few seconds until he dropped his gaze back down to the notebook. Not once did he pull away from the touch on his ear.

A free claw sneaked to Dib's shirt, grasping the material. "_Another_." Zim instructed under his breath, and he tugged Dib closer to bridge that gap. "Please." he whispered against Dib's lips.

The sudden closeness had Dib's eyes snapping open. For a few moments, he didn't speak and instead just kept his eyes on Zim's face. One of his hands slowly rose to grab the one that was clutched in his shirt, only to clasp their fingers together. After that, Dib finally leaned forward again to press his lips against Zim's; his wide eyes closing as he did.

Zim made a pleased noise deep in his throat as he got what he wanted. He continued the kiss, tugging the other nearer with the ear he still held; fingers still fiddling with the loops there.

The students across the room, who had been chatting away, suddenly gave a long drawn out hoot at the scene. After the sound, immediate laughter broke out, soon followed by wolf whistling.

The sudden noise caused Dib to tense up and his eyes to open again. His hand let go of Zim, just so he could move it up and remove the one from his ear. While he did that, he pulled away from the kiss as a scowl came to his face. "Let go." When he successfully got Zim's hand away from his ear, he moved away just to sit back in his chair, but not without bringing his notebook with him. His hand reached out to grab his pencil so he could go back to doodling, as if none of the last few minutes had ever happened.

Zim stared at Dib and then glanced to the other students across the way, who were now making kissy faces and sounds. He gave a disgusted sound before turning to ignore them and look back at Dib. Interspecies relations; how nice.

Zim scratched his cheek and then moved his legs from under him to sit on the edge of the table, feet on the bench. He leaned closer to Dib to whisper. "Aren't you going to defend yourself?"

Dib didn't look at Zim when the other asked the question. Instead, he continued to doodle random things which mostly consisted of many of the students being mauled by rabid animals. "No, I'm not. There's no point."

Zim scoffed before sitting up straight. "You're missing out." He pushed off the table to hop down onto his feet. "On a lot." Running a hand through his hair, Zim brushed it away from his face before turning to wander off.

Dib finally lifted his head to watch Zim get off the table. His eyes narrowed a bit before he moved his hands up to yank his headphones completely off his neck. He threw both his CD player and notebook back into his bag, slinging it over his shoulder, and moved off the table, walking after the other teen.

Once Dib was close enough, he grabbed hold of Zim's arm for a second so he could move his hand down and link their hands together. "Come here." With those simple words he made his way to the other side of the cafeteria, where the other kids were sitting.

Zim made many startled, and unsure noises as he was then grabbed, yanked, and soon lead to the other side of the room; not expecting such courage (or blatancy) from the Dib. "C-coming?"

The other students hadn't expected of all people, Dib, to come waltzing over to their side of the cafeteria. Most of them laughed and giggled to each other at the sudden boldness. Their whispering stopping when either stood in front of them.

Once Dib was in front of the other students, his sudden courage seemed to vanish. He looked each person over and thought about turning around and walking right back to the table, but his eyes rested back on Zim for a second. He knew if he did that, the green boy would never let him live it down.

So, with a final sigh, and narrowed eyes, Dib tried his best to keep the shaky tone out of his voice as he looked back at the other students. "I seemed to notice that you all can't keep your mouths shut. I suppose you never really learned the definition of privacy, but I guess brain dead morons like you can't really learn much." He was going to die.

That seemed to cause amused laughter among the students, while some gawked that Dib had the gall to speak his mind.

"Well, hello there, Romeo." One of the boys spoke up, his eyes flitting to Zim. "Or should I say _Romeos_" That got a loud round of laughter from his surrounding friends.

"There's a time and a place for that." a girl spoke up, gesturing to where Dib and Zim had been. "It's called a 'hotel room'." Everyone laughed again.

Dib's expression became hard as he stared at each of the students. The last thing that had been said caused him to blink his eyes and a sudden smirk to come over his face. Dib pulled Zim in front of himself by the hand he still held, letting go only to wrap his arms around the other's front, from behind. He let his head drop down so he could rest his chin on the shorter teen's shoulder and kept his eyes on the other students the entire time. "Really? I think we were doing just fine right here. Don't you, Zim?" With those words, he lifted his head a bit so he could nuzzle his nose and lips against the other's cheek.

Zim was slow to the uptake, too busy staring wide eyed at Dib, wondering if peer pressure had ruptured a brain wrinkle or five in the other's head. "Y-yea." A wide grin eventually pulled on his face. "Right here." He raised a hand, mussing Dib's dark hair before he found those earrings again, to toy with. "We could have a go at it... right now." His free hand sought one of Dib's, linking fingers. He drew the other's hand down to the bottom of his shirt, helping Dib tug it up to run both fingers across his bare stomach.

The boys 'eww'ed, while the girls giggled loudly, and a few gawked as if waiting to see if anything did follow through.

Dib almost panicked at Zim's bold suggestion, but instead of freaking out, he kept going. The hand that Zim had hold of moved up the other's skin, pushing more of his shirt up in the process. His other hand moved down, falling dangerously low as it tried to slip inside Zim's skirt. His lips eventually moved closer and closer to Zim's, but were only able to capture the side of the other's mouth, so, instead, Dib dropped his head back down. He only gave in so that he could bite at the other's shoulder lightly.

Zim made a sharp noise, a throaty groan soon to follow as he leaned his head back against Dib. He arched his back, curling his fingers over Dib's as more green skin was revealed on his flat stomach. His free hand ran through Dib's hair, keeping the other's head near for any extra biting he might want. He pressed back against Dib, his hips moving near that daring hand at his skirt waistline.

The sight had many dark blushing faces, and by then several of the boys took it in themselves to leave, dragging their girlfriends with them.

"Nasty!"

"Nooo, I wanna see what happens!"

"Ewww. I think I'm blinded!"

"I feel like I should be paying to watch."

The sound of most, if not all, of the students leaving didn't even seem to faze Dib as he was suddenly too caught up in what he was doing. Painted nails ran up and down green skin as he tried to touch all that he could, still aggravated by the piece of clothing that was still blocking it. His teeth continued to just barely graze over skin, until he finally got bored of it. The hand that was traveling down grabbed hold of Zim's skirt, just so he could twist the other boy around to face him. Both of his hands fell down to grab the shorter boy's hips right before he pressed his lips against the other's.

Zim barely had a chance to make any protest as his lips were slammed against Dib's; the pleased groans all muffled, along with his grin. He ran a hand up Dib's front to meet with the other at Dib's neck, his claws catching along the fine chains on the other's shirt. Zim leaned his hips closer to the other, liking the feel of hands there. It was safest to say he'd long forgotten their audience of students. Though there were few left to really be cared about; just one creepy geek with hands shifting in his pockets and one permanently gawking girl.

Dib couldn't help the smallest muffled sounds of his own when Zim pushed closer to him. One of his hands moved away from the boy's hip so it could slide up and slip under the back of the other's shirt, trying to claw at skin once more. The simple kiss soon turned into a bit more as Dib pushed his tongue past lips with no real warning. His piercing clacked against the other's rigid teeth as he invaded Zim's mouth, and soon became drawn to the thin tongue, wrapping his own around it.

Zim enjoyed the sound and feel of Dib's tongue piercing against his teeth; it meant it was now his to play with, that he got what he wanted from two days ago. But that's when he felt it; something far too hot sliding into his mouth, like something much too spicy, playing at his tongue and invading his mouth with a mild burning. It was like before when he had licked Dib's tongue, that instant hot on contact. Zim jerked away, so suddenly he staggered. Quickly, he clapped his hands over his mouth. Were humans venomous? He couldn't remember. The human anatomy information he quickly skimmed over were a horrid blur in his foggy mind.

The sudden loss of body contact had Dib's eyes opening wide. The hands which had still been in the air quickly dropped back down at his sides as he moved his eyes towards Zim. He was tried to get his thoughts in order, but it wasn't working out so well. His eyes moved back over to the table, where the only remaining students were and he was finally able to remember why all of that had taken place. One of his hands slowly moved up to clutch the strap of his bag, while his eyes narrowed before falling down to the floor.

Zim started to say something, but his hands muffled it. He pulled his hands away enough so he could speak through his fingers, though he didn't look at Dib. "I... -Zim's gotta… Z- I gotta go. Um." He took a small side step from Dib. "Read stuff." Quickly, he turned to run off.

Dib barely looked up as Zim spoke. His expression didn't even change as the other teen started to move away. Instead of trying to stop him, Dib only looked back down, still refusing to say anything. In the end, his feet led him in the opposite direction as he sought out another table to sit down at to try and forget what happened.


	8. Chapter 8

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** moon-glaive

Chapter 08

The blur of annoyed grunts and angry voices were ignored as Zim pushed himself through herds of students to get as far as possible from where he had been. The only thing on his mind: the hot feeling in his mouth. The warmth was slowly leaving, most likely diluted by his own saliva, but it still made no sense to him. Well, perhaps it should; he _had_ let an alien creature stick its tongue in his mouth. What was he thinking? That was vile, and, and-- interracial, interspecies, and so many colours of the rainbow wrong.

Zim shut his eyes a moment to think, keeping his hands clapped over his mouth. Unfortunately, ocular impairment did not lend well to navigation of unfamiliar territory. Zim walked smack into something quite ungracefully.

"Bulls-eye!" a loud shout came from one body while another fell to the floor. "Right on the nose! Did you see that, Jess? We should make her walk in front more often. It's much safer for us." Familiar laughter soon followed the words.

"You're a riot, Alex. Really, you are." Jessica's calm voice was heard in response to the other girl as she helped their fallen friend up. As soon as they were both standing back up, she turned her gaze on the one they had bumped into. "Zim, you should watch where you're going." She glared back at Alex who was still laughing, letting out a small sigh when the other girl failed at trying to calm herself.

Zim blinked his eyes open and looked over each girl in surprise. "Jeph! Ahex! Feeta!" He blinked and looked at the purple-haired girl, still with his hands over his mouth. "Oh-! Forry Feeta. Dimn't fee you there. I waf jusf. Uhhhhhh. Going hoo, um..." He looked from right to left; many students were staring at him; from the sounds of things, hot gossip of what had just happened was already being regurgitated from those who had run screaming from the scene in the cafeteria. Zim slowly looked back to the three girls. "Faa..yeaaaa.."

Despite the apology Zita still looked quite annoyed as she glanced at Zim. One of her hands moved up to rub at her face before she moved both to smooth down her clothes. "You better be." She blinked her eyes, and allowed her hands to drop back down. "Wait, you did say sorry, right?"

Jessica herself also looked a bit confused, and the fact that they had an audience wasn't helping her train of thought very much. Before she could even open her mouth to try and get a word in, Alex had taken the liberty, and done so for her.

"Back away! He's ours right now!" The brown haired girl had latched herself onto Zim, and was giving each student around them evil eyes. "You had your chance. He bumped into us, not you." That display was enough for most of the students to shuffle away from the scene, a few of them whining under their breath.

Zim glanced around confused, yet thankful for the, uh, whatever it was Alex was doing to make everyone go away, and mind their own business. "Umm. F-fanks? Uh. Huh." Girls were crazy, territorial creatures; it was obviously an universal trait. Zim glanced at the girl attached to himself not sure what to make of it.

"Not a problem!" Alex gave a small smile as she looked back at Zim, but soon it turned into a devious grin as she let go of the other. She moved to stand in front of Zim, and leaned forward, invading the boy's personal space as she spoke. "Now, we want to know about all of this juicy information going around that we weren't told about first."

"Why would we want to be told about it first? Are you crazy?" Zita spoke up before Zim could even answer. A small disgusted noise came from her as she shuddered. "Why do we care if Dib had his way with him on a table," she blinked her eyes before shaking her head in frustration, "or whatever it was."

"I believe it was up against a wall." Jessica gave a small shrug at her own information. "Although, that could be just as wrong."

Zim looked from one to the other before looking back at Alex. News traveled fast, real fast, faster than any warp speed he'd known. Now that was an energy to harness; the power of rumor!  
"Well. Youffee. Uhh." How to go about saying this the normal way, and retrieve information at the same time. Zim blinked as he took a small step back regaining his personal space. "Hiff mouff waff hot." He glanced away. "Fery hot." He looked back to Alex again. "Burning hot. An' I down't know why."

Alex gave Zim a small, curious look before she ended up breaking out into giggles once again. "I'll bet it was." She was pushed aside as Jessica took the spot in front of Zim, but that didn't stop her laughter at all.

"What do you mean it was hot?" Jessica moved her hands up so she could place them on Zim's cheeks. "That doesn't make any sense. Open your mouth."

"Oh! I know!" Zita jumped up and down. "Maybe Dib was eating one of those really hot candies before he kissed Zim." Both of the girls gave her a blank look which caused her to move back a bit, and pout. "It was just a thought."

Zim slowly lowered his hands from his mouth, then opened it like he was told. "The Dib wasn't eating anything. We were drawing mutated fruit, no eating involved." He opened his mouth agaib, but continued talking anyway. "Why would you bet it's hot?" He glanced at Alex. "Is the mouth suppose to be hot? It didn't really hurt. It was just so- so sudden. Kind of like- woosh!" Zim flared out his hands in gesture. "When he stuck his tongue in."

"Alex was just being stupid when she said that, Zim. Don't mind her." Jessica ignored the loud _Hey_ that came from the other girl after she spoke. Instead, she turned Zim's head from side to side looking inside his mouth. "You have a weird tongue."

"Let me see!" Zita ran up to stand beside the blonde, and moved her face close so she could get a good look. "Oh! Wow! How did you make it do that? Was that surgery? Did it hurt? Where can I get that done? I want mine to look like that." She moved a finger out to poke at it only to have Jessica slap it away. "Ow!"

Jessica shot a glare at the other girl before looking back at Zim so she could inspect the boy's mouth once more. "I don't see anything wrong. And, no, mouths aren't supposed to be hot. You've never kissed anyone before, have you?"

It wasn't Zita's questioning, but Jessica's that caused Zim's eyes to open wide. He looked skyward for a quick moment. "Uhhh." He looked left. "Well. I. um. Zim has. Kinda." He looked right. "B-back _hom_e .. -there were these t-two, and mouths touched." Zim pointed, laughing in all his nervousness. "And, I recall there being no hotness of the mouth like that. I- it was _hot_ but not h-hot.. and yeaa." Zim laughed stupidly.

All three girls stared open-mouthed at Zim as Jessica dropped her hands from the teen's cheeks. Alex was the only one to recover as she pushed the other two aside, so she could be in front of Zim once again. "Wait a minute. Forget your kissy-kissy problems with Dib." A large grin spread over her face. "Tell us more about what went on back home with those other two you were talking about."

Jessica and Zita didn't even seem to mind being pushed aside all that much. Both were too interested in what Zim had to say in response to Alex. Although, Jessica tried to look as unenthusiastic as she could, she was failing.

"A-a...oh-" Yes, those were vowel sounds, Zim. He tried to figure out what had just happened, and how the topic had just shifted to his past exploits, and wondrous mouth; it tended to say things it shouldn't. "B-but my 'kissy-kissy' problem is.. -I.. maybe.." Alex was staring at him too intently for Zim to think of any statement or question that wasn't stupid; his mind wasn't exactly coherent due to his recent encounter with Dib. The question wasn't helping. "They were just.. uh.. friends of Zim's. Yea." Zim nodded slowly. "Very.. special .. friends." He bit his knuckle; he was doomed.

"How far did you go with them? Did you just kiss? Did you do more?" It was Zita's turn to ask the questions, but such questions caused Jessica to slap her on the arm in an attempt to quiet her down. "Hey, stop hitting me."

"Well, do you want everyone in Skool to know that Zim made out with two other people? That's not the best news to be throwing around right now." Jessica proposed as she continued to glare at the other girl.

"It's some of the best _I've_ heard all day." Alex couldn't help but let out a small giggle at that, but stopped midway through to finish. "Although, hearing that Dib is so touchy-feely with Zim here doesn't really disappoint me either."

"W-we don't talk anymore. I had to, uh, move. Yea. See." Zim threw out his arms. "Zim had to move here, and I never saw them again." He glanced at Zita, and hoped the girl would be satisfied enough with that answer; though knowing these three, the _Gossip Queens_, as Dib had put it, she wouldn't be. He just hoped Jessica would remember her own advice before he continued, "So, you see, two mouths and no hot burning. Is there something in the Dib's mouth that.. does.. uh.. stuff? Makes it so dangerous? Cuz Zim licked his tongue before and it was hot." Zim blinked; yep, there was no such thing as _non-incriminating_ anymore.

Alex was still having a hard time with her laughter, let alone keeping a straight face; so, Jessica answered instead. It was safer that way. "I really have no idea why it would have been hot. Maybe you're just allergic to something Dib ate. He could have been eating before you got there, and some of the food was still stuck in his teeth, or something."

"That's gross." Zita stuck out her tongue at such a thought, and tried to push Jessica aside so that she could move in front of Zim. "You're just imagining things, Zim. There's no way Dib's mouth could be hot. It makes no sense. None of this does."

Zim actually gave that some thought making a small noise with his mouth as he tasted it with his tongue. The heat was less now but still noticeable. "Maybe I'm allergic to his mouth. The saliva. That would make better sense." It did, and he was going to make some analysis and tests on it when he got a chance to get back to his base; look over the anatomy, and makeup of the human species. _That_ would be something eerie to report back to Tallest Miyuki with. _Yes, the humans are non-threatening creatures, but don't stick your tongue in their mouth, for it burns. It burns_. "Humans are strange.. er- I mean boys are strange. No- wait- Dib is strange. Yes. I said Dib. Dib. Yes. He is very strange," said the disguised alien who let slip that he had made out with two other _aliens_ to these three aliens who lived, and breathed on juicy rumors.

Alex had finally stopped laughing just so she could stare at Zim with an amused expression. "Well, at least the two of you can be strange together." Those words only had her laughing once more.

Jessica rolled her eyes shifting an annoyed look back at Alex. It did no good. She gave in after a few seconds, and looked back at Zim with narrowed eyes. "I don't see why you would be allergic to his mouth. That makes as much sense as anything else." She shrugged her shoulders. "But, whatever."

"Right, well, I should uh- go." Zim pointed down the hall. "I need to go rinse my mouth out, or something useful like that. Then I should probably do the 'class' thing. Haven't done that yet. That should be an experience." Zim put his hands on his hips and nodded. "Then again- nor has the Dib since yesterday. And neither are you three. I wonder if this 'class' thing is just some conspiracy." He looked around shifty-eyed.

"Actually, we're supposed to be in the library right now working on a project, but Jessica said we shouldn't have to worry about it till much later." Zita moved, away from Zim and stood straight so she could cross her arms.

Alex quickly moved a hand out to grab hold of Zim's arm afraid that the teen would vanish right on the spot. "Besides, you're not getting away yet." She leaned in close to him, and glanced down the hall as if someone would pop out of nowhere at any second. "You still have yet to tell us what really happened between you and Dib."

Jessica let out a small sigh that seemed a little too forced. "Come on, Alex. Leave him alone about it." She tapped her foot for a few seconds. "Unless he really does want to tell us."

Zim wiggled his fingers; everyone loved to grab and yank his arm it seemed. "H-hm. Well." He scratched claws through his hair. "The Dibness and I were drawing mutant plant life fruitations, then he drew me, then he kissed me, then some students made siren-esque howls, then the Dib stopped kissing me, then he pulled Zim over to the howling monkey children, and we started kissing again right then and there." Zim rested a hand on his cheek in memory. "Yea. That was neat." He frowned disapprovingly. "Then he stuck his tongue in my mouth, and it got hot. So. I left. The end!" He flared out a hand and smiled widely to please, hoping that was enough to sate them.

"Oh, Dib drew a picture of you? That's so sweet." Zita clasped her hands to her chest at the thought before turning to look at Jessica just so she could shake the girl by the shoulders. "Jess, why won't some guy draw a picture of me? I'm cute aren't I?"

Jessica could only mutter a few incoherent words, considering Zita was trying to shake the life out of her. So, she quickly moved to grab the other girl's arms, and turned her own eyes on her. "Yes, Zita, you're cute!" Those words earned a squeal from the purple-haired girl. She gave out a frustrated sigh before letting go of the other's arms and turning her attention back to Zim. "So, you just sort of left? Hmm."

"Poor Dib, all alone and scorned. 'My lover doesn't love me. My soul she weeps', or something just as stupid as that, right?" Alex couldn't help it and started laughing once more which caused Jessica to scold the girl. Alex only ignored it.

Zim gave a slow nod. "That sounds exactly like the Dib." He pointed at the laughing girl. "Just as bad, just as sad." He stuck out his tongue as if tasting something disgusting and sour; might as well have, the bad poetry was just awful. Zim blinked and gave a slight chuckle. "Dibness' soul is a girl." He tapped his teeth with a grin. "That would explain a lot." He cackled unpleasantly to himself at that. "At least the drawing of Zim was good. I was amazed considering only smelly poetry comes from that hand. The Dib captured all the greatness that was Zim in just a few scribbles of graphite on blue-tattooed, dried tree-slices. T'was gewd. I want it." Manual, primitive art was something new and enthralling, considering the only pictures of people Zim had seen were replicas taken by computers of the highest quality.

Jessica turned her eyes back to Zim after having shouted at Alex. The boy's words caused her to give him a curious look. "I find you to be the strange one, Zim. You're going out with Dib, and yet so far, you haven't had one good thing to say about him. Well, aside from his art, but it was of you so that makes sense."

Alex tried to hold in a giggle at Jessica's sudden interest. Her eyes moved from her friend, to the green boy, then back again. "What do you care, Jess? Like it really matters. It's pretty sad when even Dib's boyfriend can see all the things wrong with him, and he just got here."

"I'll take him if you don't want him, Zim!" Zita practically clung to the boy's arm with her sudden announcement. The other two girl's looked at her as if she were insane. "What? Just because I think he's weird doesn't mean I can't try to like him. Especially if he's so willing to draw pictures of whoever he likes, or even write about them, maybe." She gave out a small sigh. "It's really romantic if you think about it."

"Yeah, in a gag me sort of way." Alex rolled her eyes after she spoke just before she looked away.

Zim made a horridly, disgusted face at the girl who clung to him. "But he writes so badly. Why would you want that torture on your, uh, listening? Not to mention he has so many horrible boyfriend qualities." He counted off on his claws "He's too tall. He's not nice. He hates everything. And he's malfunctioning." Zim looked at the four claws, then looked at his other hand that Zita still clung to. "On the other hand: He has piercings. He draws much better than he writes. He likes my skirt. He's obedient, and he makes good furniture. And I've run out of fingers." Zim compared hands. "That's four against four." He looked at Zita with a wry smirk. "I'll let him know you're interested." he teased.

"Tall men are the best. I can't believe you don't like such a quality." Zita let go of Zim's arm so she could clasp her fingers together once again. "You can feel so much safer in their arms as opposed to someone much shorter than you." She hugged herself before blinking her eyes, realizing she was daydreaming. "Well, anyway, I wouldn't want to have to be the one to make my man feel safe. It should be the other way around."

Jessica only gave a small smile at Zita's display before she spoke up. "And besides, Dib must not hate everything. He kissed you didn't he? Plus, he's going out with you." She put a finger to her chin in thought. "That's a pretty strange definition of hatred."

"Safe?" Zim blinked at Zita. That wasn't something he'd ever considered with height. Height meant power and unrequited respect; he wasn't about to randomly give that to some tall, alien male. Safety in height? The smaller protecting the small. That actually amused Zim and he chuckled to himself. "The Dib _is_ strange." Zim turned to Jessica. Though the comment felt hypocritical on so many levels. "Then again, most people here are strange." He couldn't help but copy Jessica's gesture, placing his finger on his chin, tapping it in thought.

"You can say that again." Alex couldn't help but agree with Zim even if it earned her harsh looks from both of her friends. "Don't listen to them, Zim." She moved forward once more so she could be the one in the boy's line of sight. "Sure you want to feel safe around the person you love, but you still want to feel like you have some control." She moved a hand up to try, and push back the one piece of hair that hung in front of her eyes. "If you can feel both at the same time, then everything is perfect."

"Yes, and you should know. You haven't had one successful relationship since I've known you." Jessica didn't even flinch at the glare Alex sent her way.

"In control." Zim listed it on one claw. "Safe." He listed on another. "That is love. That is perfection." He nodded committing the information to memory. He lowered both hands only to reach back up, and scratch at the back of his head, ruffling the dark hair there. His eyes sifted half-closed as he thought something over, but he didn't say anything; though, in the end, he glanced back to Alex in curiosity. "Is this formula always true?"

Alex quickly looked back at Zim ignoring Jessica for the moment. "What? Oh, yeah." Her anger was forgotten for the moment as she answered Zim's question. "Of course it is. As long as you can always feel such things around the person, then that's pretty much love." She crossed her arms over her chest before going on. "You want to make sure it's the right person of course. If you don't feel even the least bit safe, or just don't enjoy being with the person, then obviously they aren't it."

Zim made a long, thoughtful sound, his eyes widening in the process. "I will remember that, oh, knowledgeable Alex." He nodded soon after. It was just another paragraph of information for his report back to Tallest Miyuki; it didn't apply to him at all. Breeding was pointless, though the body was something fun; in the end, there was no real point in having _the right person_. Of course, that didn't stop Irken from having _favorites_ _slaves_ or _pets_.

Zita moved Alex aside earning an annoyed sound from the girl in the process. "So, does that mean you don't feel any of those things around Dib, or does that mean you do?"

"Well, of course he doesn't." Alex rubbed at the spot on her arm where Zita had pushed her. "If we had to sit there and tell him what love is all about, then obviously he really doesn't feel anything for Dib." She let out a small laugh. "Which I find very funny."

"Yeah, you would." Jessica narrowed her eyes on Alex before allowing her gaze to fall back on Zim.

Zim looked from one girl to another. All three stared intently at him waiting to hear his personal feelings on the matter. He gave a slight nervous laugh, and shook both of his hands. "Don't be so silly. I just met the Dib a few days ago. He _just_ stuck his tongue in my mouth, and I went running." He laughed harder; doomed. "It's a bit early to be talking about such silly things like _love_." Not to mention out of the question.

All three girls looked back and forth between each other as if one would have an answer the other didn't. Zita took such silence as an opportunity to bite at her nails, a nervous habit she had that she would never quit. Finally, Jessica was the one to turn narrowed eyes back on Zim, her head tilted a bit as she spoke. "Well, it's true that you two just met, but all the talk about you two being together was able to spread the first day you came here. Not to mention what happened in the library."

"It's just weird that's all." Alex shrugged her shoulders before waving a hand. "If you're just trying to get really close to him, then that sort of makes sense. He's not that interesting, so I don't see the point in why you would want to."

Zim clacked his mouth shut and froze. He laughed hard, and much too loudly before shaking his head. "No. No. Of course not! It's just for fun. Nothing serious." He waved a hand weakly. "It's not like we're going to pick out matching curtains, table cloth, napkins and place mats." Zim chuckled loosely, feeling that hole he was digging grow bigger. "I.. uh. Yeaa. We've all had our fair share of relationships. Right?" Zim forced a laugh.

Zita continued to bite at her nails vigorously, while Jessica looked away with a scowl. Alex was the only one to keep her eyes on Zim, but even she seemed a bit nervous. "Well, we have, but they were all serious. It's sort of hard to explain, since you've never really felt anything for anyone before it seems." She stared at the other for a few seconds before a small frown came to her face. "I'm guessing it'll probably continue to be that way." Those words caused Jessica to elbow her in the side. "Ow!"

"Well, that's rude." Jessica dropped her arm before turning her attention back on Zim. "Sometimes doing certain things like that for fun can hurt people, that's all." She moved a hand up to twirl at her hair as she tried to explain things. "I guess it all depends on if the both of you are in it for fun, but I suppose Dib wouldn't agree to it if that wasn't the case." She let her hand fall back down. "Him and fun don't mix very well, though."

"I've felt-!" Zim jabbed a finger Zita's way, but his energy died away as he thought about it more, "s-stuffff.. before. L-like I said." He tapped his two claws together guiltily, staring at them instead of making eye contact. "There were these two back home. Z-Zim felt a lot for them. Zim did a lot for them. They made Zim very, very happy." He gave the smallest of smiles without realizing it as memories ran through his mind's eye.

Zita had jumped back at the sudden shout and attention sent her way, then quickly scurried behind Jessica for safety. "Freak..."

Jessica didn't even give Zita a glance. Instead, she kept her eyes on Zim as she spoke up again. "Well, why didn't you try to keep in touch with them? Writing letters, and things like that aren't really so hard to do. Why would you just up, and try to flirt with Dib if you just got out of a really good relationship with people you cared for?"

"Maybe he just needed someone to latch on to." It was Alex's turn to act much like Zita had before. She clasped her hands together, but looked more like she was mocking the idea than being sincere. "Poor, little Zim was so lonely he just wanted the first person he saw. So, Dib was his victim of choice." She got another elbow in the side for her comments. "Stop it!"

Zim's small smile immediately died away to an all out frown. His head lowered, dark hair veiling his face; though, it was obvious he was quite dejected. He tapped his fingers twice before they stopped, tip to tip. "They, uh..th-they dumped me." he answered rather quietly.

Each of the girl's frowned at what Zim said. It took awhile before any of them would speak up as Zita walked forward, and placed a hand on the boy's shoulder. "Don't worry Zim, Alex knows exactly how you feel." She gave out a startled noise as she was yanked back by said girl. "Hey! Let go!"

"Well, don't say such things!" Alex narrowed her eyes on the other girl. "Besides, I wasn't dumped; I was let go for other reasons that are best left private." She let go of Zita's arm and gave a small nod.

Jessica rolled her eyes at that. "You were dumped for the prettier girls. Just face it already." She easily dodged the blow that Alex tried to land on her.

Zim shut one eye as he watched the girls go at each other. It was amusing to watch for a moment before something crossed his mind to ask; and who better to get it from than the horse's mouth ...horses'. "The Dib says he has never been in a relationship before." He gave a short laugh. "Understandable. But.." Zim scratched the side of his head; damn itchy wig. "There is this poemy-thing written in his little, black book of deathness about kissing and pining and...eyeballs. Is there a was of a who?"

Alex was attempting to punch Jessica, but the sudden question stopped her in her tracks. She turned to look back at Zim. "Eyeballs? What type of stuff is he writing about?"

Jessica only shook her head, and let go of the other girl's arms causing Alex to almost lose her balance. "I don't really know what you're talking about since, like I said, Dib doesn't let anyone look in that book he carries." She gave a small shrug. "I don't really know of anyone Dib has cared for. That's why it's hard for anyone to really comprehend the possibility that you two are going out."

"If he wrote something about kissing he probably just made it up on the spot." Zita nodded her head as if her thought made the most sense. "He's weird like that. I have Literature class with him. Sometimes he writes a poem or two for an assignment if he has to, and they don't really mean much. Just typical, depressing nonsense."

Zim blinked a few times, pressing a claw to his cheek. "So the Dib has liked no one? Has given no inclination of liking anyone? There's no trauma, or horrid event to cause such a personal poem?" He shook his head with a confused scowl. "Then, it makes no sense for him to not tell me the reasoning, or pretend like there is none to tell. There is no reason for the Dibness to act like he has a shady past when there is none." Zim huffed, and crossed his arms. "You would think he would tell his boyfriend such things, but noooo. The Dib rather be a puzzle wrapped in an enigma deep fried in mystery with a side of conundrum with sprinkles of chocolate-flavored questioning." Zim did a double-take at his own words. "Oh, wait, Zim was the one that ran out on Dib. Heh. Oops."

"Well, we don't know much about Dib's personal life outside of Skool." Jessica herself looked a bit annoyed at such a thing, but went on anyway. "We don't even bother talking to his sister. It would just be ridiculous to even try. Any dirt we get on her is by chance, and much too rare."

Alex moved to lean against the nearby wall while nodding her head. "It's true. We've never once even been in the same room with her. Well, unless you count lunch, but that's not much. People talk too much to really hear anything."

Zita looked between both girls before she settled her eyes back on Zim. "See, you'll just have to hope you can get something out of Dib yourself. If you two are just doing this for fun, though, I don't know why you're expecting him to tell you so much."

Zim clutched his head. "Mmm! I don't know anymore. Humans are just too confusing. Why can't anyone just be to the point." He grumbled for a moment as he thought things over. Finally coming up with a conclusion, he clapped his hands together with a happy noise. "Who cares! Whatever happens, happens. There are far more worrisome things to worry about than whose is the what's is who." Zim pointed at each girl. "And, for random's sake: I hope you girls have shake proof houses. That said, Zim should go now. I have.. an essay to finish up._Very_ important." He grinned widely at that.

Each of the girls gave Zim a blank stare at the boy's words. Only after a few moments did Jessica find her voice, and try to speak as best she could in response. "A-Alright then. Sorry to have kept you, Zim." She titled her head just a bit as a concerned look came over her face. "I hope we didn't pry too much or at least helped a bit." A loud _What_ came from Alex, but she ignored it.

Zim's grin only grew wider, and he nodded. With a sharp wave he was off; running down the hall this time slipping into the crowd rather than shoving through it.

As diluted as the foreign saliva in his mouth now was, it would still be easier to scan it there at the skool than to run home over it. Zim stopped outside the dual bathroom entrances. He looked from one to the other; one had a dress, the other did not. He glanced down at his own skirt. "Hm!" It took a boy coming from one of the entrances for Zim actually to run in. Though, at the same time, he got many a strange look; why was that girl all in pink going into the _boy's_ bathroom?


	9. Chapter 9

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Karasu

Chapter 09

The bell rang, signaling the start of the next class period which caused students to once again hurry along the halls. Amongst them all, Dib walked along the side of the lockers while trying his best to avoid each body as best he could. He wasn't very successful as a few people crammed him against the hard metal from time to time, earning themselves a harsh glare from him. They paid him no mind which aggravated Dib further, but he continued on anyway, finding no real point in it after awhile.  
Thankfully it didn't take much longer before he was finally walking into class. Dib didn't even glance at the teacher who he was sure was giving him the worst look. Instead, he made his way to the seat near the middle row and sat down, dropping his bag to the floor before he took out what he needed. He was still trying to forget what happened earlier, but by the sounds of things the students around him weren't. That fact only made him bury his face in his arms as soon as he was settled.

Behind Dib there was a loud thud of a body who plunked themselves in their chair with a satisfied noise. "So _this_ is what a class is like. How crude," the voice spoke with no concern or caring who heard his thinking aloud. There were sounds of movement; looking around. "Where is the viewing screens? The digital uplinks? The floating robots? Green walls and some white dusty writing stick? Puh. Zim is thoroughly disappointed at this experience."

Dib's whole body tensed up at the sound of the voice. He thought he would have been able to escape it for the rest of the day, but it seemed he was wrong. For just a moment he lifted his head to turned narrowed eyes on the green teen behind him. "This is a classroom, not a sci-fi movie. Moron…" He stopped speaking for just a few seconds to study the other right before he turned and rested his head back down. "Why do you keep following me? Just leave me alone already."

"Moron?" Zim hissed and he promptly leaned forward and flicked Dib behind the head. "This is Zim's class too, fool." He leaned back, crossing arms and looked away. Though he could still feel the stern look of the teacher ahead, but that didn't stop a huff. "You're a horrible boyfriend-- for saying such a thing after what just happened." Zim whispered, burning his own gaze at the back of Dib's head.

Dib moved a hand up to rub at the back of his head. What Zim said had a sigh coming from him as he realized he would have to spend all class period with the other teen. He raised his head and gave the teacher only a small glance before he whispered back. "I'm horrible? You're the one that walked out after it happened." He opened his text book trying to make it seem as if he were busy at least somewhat. "Not that it matters."

Zim immediately opened his mouth but quickly shut it before something loud and accusing came out. He lowered himself down to his desk top and whispered "I- uh... it burned." His chin finally clunked against the desk's surface and he stared at it before tracing a few carved words there on its surface before speaking. "Again. Your tongue stung me... again." His voice grew quieter as he went on.

Dib was about to speak once again, but a harsh look from the teacher shut him up before he even started. He let his eyes fall back down to his desk and his notebook that lay on top. Without much hesitation he flipped to a blank page and began writing.

_'I still don't understand why. You don't have to worry about it anymore, though. I was being stupid.'__  
_

After he was done he tried his best to tear the piece of paper out as quietly as he could. Of course the act seemed louder when he tried to be quiet, but thankfully didn't grab the teacher's attention. As soon as he had the paper in his hands he folded it halfway and passed it back behind him.

Zim took the paper with a confused expression. He looked it over, flipping it over and around before finally opening it. Quickly he glanced around. No one seemed to be paying any real attention and the teacher was too busy writing on the board. Groping around his person, Zim looked for a writing implement. Quickly he grabbed a pen from his pack and wrote carefully, and in English; though his penmanship needed more work, at least it was fairly legible. Pretty good for his first time writing Earthian.

_'With careful research I have found the reason'_ Quickly Zim crossed that out and rewrote _'I know why'_. He crossed that out too._ 'Dib'_. Crossed out. Finally Zim just settled for _'I am allergic to your saliva'_. He ended it with a happy face to make up for the ugly cross outs.  
Folding it just as neatly Zim reached over and slipped the note inside Dib's shirt collar.

The sudden feel of something trying to slide inside his shirt almost caused Dib to stand to try and get it out. He quickly realized that he was being incredibly stupid and moved a hand back to pull out the piece of paper Zim had tucked inside. He opened it and scanned over the words that were written, amused at so many words crossed out. It didn't take long for his amusement to become confusion as he tried to figure out what the other meant.

_'That's stupid.'_ No, that would only cause an argument. He scribbled out those words and tried to think of something else. _'How can you be allergic to saliva? It's in your mouth too.'_ Satisfied with that he drew on the happy face, giving it fangs. Finished he folded the paper back up and dropped it back behind on the other's desk.

Zim stared at the fallen piece of paper. This was an amusing sort of primitive way of communication. He picked up the paper and unfolded it. He stuck out his tongue. It would be funny to write: because I'm an alien from another planet, idiot. But no, tapping his pen against his teeth Zim thought it over. _'Zim is'_ Oops. Better not to incriminate with whose note sending if ever its found out. Quickly Zim scribbled out his own name thoroughly. _'It is not mine I am allergic to. It is yours. Don't ask. I just am. It is so. I should know. It is my mouth.'_ With a wide grin Zim added tentacles to the fanged happy face and then folded the paper, slipping it into Dib's collar again.

Dib took the piece of paper much like he had last time and opened it up to read what Zim had wrote. The words once again left him confused. He tapped his pencil against the desk, glancing up at the teacher every few seconds just to make sure she was still unaware of what they were doing.

_'So, that means what happened in the cafeteria won't ever happen again?'_ Dib looked over the words he had finally put down. They could have been taken either way and he didn't like the thought of that. He put his pencil to the paper again ready to scribble the words out, but hesitated and stopped himself. He tapped the point causing a few marks before finally moving it down just so he could draw a person's chewed head peeking out of the face's mouth. Once he was finished he slipped Zim the paper again.

Zim quickly snatched the paper, and it caused a few students to stare at him. Zim kept the paper captured in his hands and hunkered down against the desk until they looked away back to taking notes. Just as quick, Zim unfolded the note and read. He pursed his lips at the statement, but in the end he couldn't help but grin.

_'You want it to happen again'_ How did humans end their questions? Oh yea! That funny little backwards severed 'S' with the little poot at the bottom. Zim added the question mark to the end. Then he rethought it over and scribbled out the question mark. Then he made the happy face breathe fire, cooking his victim in his mouth. This time when Zim folded the paper he leaned and reached over Dib's shoulder dropping the paper onto his chest, letting his claws linger on fabric as he drew his hand away.

Dib couldn't help but watch Zim's hand pull away. When he moved his own up to grab at the paper he let his fingers barely brush across the other's before he pulled them away completely along with the note. He read the words inside to himself acting as if what just happened, didn't happen at all. His eyes narrowed a bit and he immediately started to answer back.

_'No, I don't!'_ He stopped just as he was about to fold the paper up and quickly straightened it out once more so he could look at the words. Slowly he moved the pencil over so he could scribble them out before writing again. _'Yes.'_ That got scribbled out too, but much harder to the point it couldn't even be seen. _'It's all pretend.'_ Those were the final words and without even doodling on the creature, Dib sent the note back.

Zim unfolded the note, musing at all the scribbles out. They were running out of room to write. Though the answer back wasn't something to grin at, and it was just as disappointing to see Dib hadn't added more to the demented smiley of death and destruction.  
Zim chewed on the back of his pen, thinking of what to write in response. He glanced around and noticed people were still staring at him. He had no book or text book to speak of. Everyone else was listening and writing down. He'd have to remember to bring better supplies. Though in the meantime-

_'Then I wanna pretend some more. You can pretend all over me if you like.'_ Zim chuckled quietly to himself as he underlined 'pretend' a few times. _'Besides, what out of this pretend are you getting anyway?' _He wrote in tinier print for an answer _'my mouth!'_ _  
_

As soon as Dib finally got the note back he looked it over. It took him a while to find the recent writing, and what Zim put had him letting out a quiet groan. He gave another look up at the teacher to make sure she wasn't looking. Certain he was safe, Dib balled up the paper they had been using and let it fall inside his bag. He then went about ripping another piece from his notebook which earned him a sharp look from the teacher. He raised a hand and waved at her until she finally turned back around. He narrowed his eyes at her back before he went about writing a note back.

_'You'd still enjoy it? Even if it was to hurt?'_ Double meaning, if the other boy were to figure it out, oh well. Dib didn't want to scribble it out. He drew a small little mutated demon in the corner of the paper with stick legs and arms before he finally folded it up. Instead of the letting paper fall back like before, he turned around and handed it over keeping his eyes on Zim's own.

The green boy was taken aback to actually see Dib's front escorting the note. Zim didn't know what to make of the other's expression but he returned it with a grin nonetheless. With little hesitance he reached out and took the note, his claws lingered on the fingers before it took the note from the other's hand.Zim waited till Dib turned back around before he began unfolding and reading. He hunkered down to write.  
_'It doesn't so much hurt as it does burn and sting. Mildly.'_ Zim blinked and crossed 'mildly' out. And wrote 'Mediumly' instead. He made a small frustrated sound. It was hard to explain, especially in a language he wasn't fluent in; just yet. He continued writing. _'It is hot but bearable. Besides- I like a challenge.'__  
_Zim then drew the mutated demon a buddy, a mutated pineapple with tentacles and a sharp grin. He drew one of the tentacles holding the other demon's stick arm and added a heart above them. Folding it he rested it on Dib's shoulder.

Dib grabbed the note and didn't even look at the teacher as he opened it. What he read caused him to take a quick glance back at Zim with narrowed eyes. He didn't keep his eyes on the other for long and was soon picking up his pencil to write down his answer.

_'Fine, if you're so willing and it's what you want. I still don't like it.'_ The words on the paper didn't even sound convincing to himself and he couldn't help but sigh at them. His eyes moved over to the doodle and instead of continuing he sketched something under it. First a small tiny figure of Zim and beside it himself. Around them he began to draw small tiny hearts until he realized what he was doing and quickly started scribbling the shapes out. After he was done he slipped the paper back to Zim and rested his head down with a groan.

Zim glanced up, Dib made a bad meat shield when he was leaning forward like that. But all the same Zim unfolded the note and read. It was nothing short of a very Dib response, and it didn't surprise Zim at all; how boring. Though he looked over the tiny sketch of himself and Dib, and the floating masses of scribble above their head. They looked like clouds, or floating masses of fecal matter.  
Zim tapped his teeth with his pen, something the girls said running through his mind there and then. Might as well pen it down.

_'Have you ever felt safe and in charge around anyone?'_ The note was sent Dib's way soon after.

Dib looked over the note once he had it, his head barely lifting off the desk the entire time. It actually took him awhile to think over the question and even then he wasn't so sure of how he wanted to answer._'For a few seconds.'_ He quickly scratched that out so it couldn't be seen. i _'Once.'_ /i That was scratched out as well, to the point of almost ripping the paper. _'Why?'_ That was the final word Dib sent back.

Zim found himself staring at that one question, his chin resting on the desk. A question was not an answer to a question. He raised his gaze up to the black board. The teacher had written something up there that didn't make much sense to him, nor did he care much to figure it out. His gaze wandered to the students around him. They weren't much interested either. Zim sighed, causing the note to dance a little and almost get away. He tacked it down with a claw and dragged it back to his lower line of vision. He would have liked to have read Dib's previous answers. Looking at the energetic scribbles they must have given some rather good insight. All the same Zim scraped up a reply after a good few minutes._'Curious. Now answer.'_ Okay, so it wasn't the best of replies, but Zim sent it Dib's way anyway.

Dib wasn't happy with what he got back, because that meant he actually had to answer with what he had originally scribbled out. His hesitation was obvious as he began to tap his pencil against the paper creating dots that previously weren't there before.

_'Yes, maybe, for a few seconds.'_ That would hopefully satisfy the other boy and keep him from asking any other questions. It certainly didn't keep Dib from just barely handing the note over though.

Of course in no time of opening and reading Zim quickly wrote one word and tossed it over Dib's shoulder; much to the other's chagrin._'When?'__  
_

That one word caused Dib to quickly tense up. His fingers ran over the paper and for a split second he thought of just balling up the note and forgetting about it. Zim wouldn't leave him alone if he did that. He would end up regretting what he was about to write.

_'In the cafeteria. When I was able to forget about all of those kids. With you.'_ His hand clenched the pencil tightly and he glanced back at Zim once again, but just as quickly dropped his eyes. He folded up the note and sent it back while still gripping his pencil, and buried his face right after.

Zim slowly unfolded the note, glancing at Dib at each subtle sound noting just how more and more the other tightened up. He couldn't suppress the grin; this had to be good. He quickly read over what was written and his eyes grew wider with each word. "My Tallest." The surprised words left him before he could clap a hand over his mouth. He shrank down as the teacher glared what should have been eye missiles at him. They were pushing their luck, but right now Zim didn't care. This was far too much fun.Snapping up his pen Zim wrote back _'THAT made you feel safe? I don't understand. Explain.'_ He reached over and tapped Dib's shoulder to get the boy's attention, soon handing the note over his shoulder after.

Dib was once again tapping his pencil after he read and wishing he had just told the other to mind his business like usual. It was too late for such things, so instead he was trying to explain himself like Zim wanted.

_'It was easy to ignore what people were saying at that moment wasn't it? I forgot anyone was even around. It's hard for me to feel comfortable around anyone, especially here. I guess that's why I felt that way. I just didn't care.'_ Dib couldn't help but think what he had written was long and pointless. Zim more than likely still wouldn't understand, but it was all he had. So, with that, he gave the paper back with less hesitation than before.

Zim snatched the paper up and promptly read. Dib's reply had him stifling giggles. Going by what the girls said, if Dib wanted to constantly feel safe and secure in his love, him and the Dib would have to permanently go walking with their lips tightly suctioned together; or constantly groping and kissing in the halls. It was a funny mental image. Zim tried to suppress it and his giggles so he could write a response.

_'We should do that more often then. So you feel comfortable ALL the time.'_ Zim chewed his lips to keep the giggles in at that._ 'But you know what you should do most of all-- take Zim'_ quickly he crossed out his own name _'ME out on a date!'_ He then doodled a little picture of them kissing. It wasn't horribly good and they looked more akin to the mutant fruit he drew earlier that day.

Dib could hear a few giggles come from Zim no matter how hard the other teen tried to hide them and it only caused Dib to snatch the paper harshly when it was handed over. He almost had to read over the words twice to make sure he got them right. Somehow in his mind they weren't adding up.

_'Why would you want to go out on a date? Dates are only for serious couples. We're no such thing, remember?'_ He glared at the last words he put down as if they were what put him in a bad mood. His eyes then fell on the small little drawing the other had done. He couldn't help but keep his eyes on it for much longer than necessary before he was folding the paper back up.

Zim took the note and just the same as before he wrote just as quickly. _'Please'_ There was a heart beside it to boot. Though when he reached over to give Dib the note he ran his pinky claw along a few of the boy's ear piercings before dropping it over.

Dib sat up straight at the sudden touch and tried hard not to lean into it, but failed. He opened the note after Zim finally sat back down and gave a harsh sigh at the one word written. It didn't look like he had much of a choice in the matter. The other boy was really starting to get under his skin way too much._'Fine, I'll take you on a date. I don't have any experience with that kind of stuff. So, it's not my fault if you end up disappointed.'_ He drew his own small heart beside Zim's that didn't end up scribbled out.

When Zim got the note back it took all his power not to let out a happy squeal. He made the note do a happy little dance instead; which got him many a weird look from the students beside him.In truth Zim just wanted to get up from class and go right away, but sadly that wouldn't work. They still had classes left, damnable classes. Zim shot the teacher a glare as if it was her fault but the moment she turned around he looked back down.  
_'VICTORY!'_ Zim wrote in what space was left. _'What will we be doing?'_ he managed to squeeze in under his word.

Dib actually had to think over the question once he was handed the paper. He had never had to plan such things before and rarely went out anyway. There were only a few places he could think of, and not a lot of them were date-worthy. That left only one real choice. So, he flipped over the paper, too lazy to tear out a new sheet, and started writing on the back._'I could take you to a cafe that's in the city. It's got some nice food, coffee, and it's quiet unlike all the restaurants.'_ Since there were no doodles to be seen, Dib took it in himself to draw the two of them much in the same position they had been in before in the cafeteria.

Zim greedily took the note and when he unfolded it he found himself staring at the little doodle beside the words. It was much better than his kissy drawing and he started doodling little hearts around it before even bothering to read what Dib had wrote. When he was satisfied with his swarm of hearts buzzing around them (he gave a few of them some teeth and eyes), he actually read the note. He grinned when he re-spotted the word 'coffee'. He knew that word! Of course he'd never actually consumed the beverage, but he never 'dated' an alien either. Trying some of the alien cuisine sounded interesting, if not an exciting adventure.

_'Is it fun? Will there be muffins? Or cookies? Hybrid! Moofies! I would love a moofie.'_ Under that he wrote _'What about after? Will we go elsewhere after? I want to see and do more than just the library yesterday. There has to be more fun in the city…'__  
_

Dib stared at the words he got back from Zim. There were so many questions that he had to figure out the answer to when he had just agreed to take the other boy out._'Yes, they serve both. Moofies...'_ He had to stop at that one. The word caused him to try and quiet a small bit of laughter before he continued writing. _'...I don't think they serve those. As for after, we can always walk around and find something you would like to do. There's different museums, movies are always playing. Things like that.'_ He moved the pencil to scratch at the back of his head for a few seconds, before trying to continue. _'See…I said I don't get out much.'__  
_

When Zim got the note back he chuckled silently to himself. "Moofies." _'So what do you do inside if you don't go outside?'_ It was a simple question and Zim spified up the note by giving the hearts on the page a few spikes, while others got jet engines to fly with. Zim slipped the note over Dib's shoulder after.

Dib grabbed for the note and the crunching paper caused the teacher to look his way. Thankfully he was able to hide the note under his desk before she saw it. Once she was looking the other way Dib placed the piece of paper on his desk and looked it over, amused by each small heart he saw.

_'I usually just like to keep to myself in my room. I have my stereo, things to write and draw with. There's not much else I really need.' _He bit at his pencil before he actually decided to write what he was thinking. _'There's never really been any other reason for me to do much else, until now I guess.'_ With that he drew small chains around a few of the hearts and flames on top of the others before he sent the note on it's way.

Zim wrote the first response that came to his mind after reading. _'Boring! How can you be so content with such a meager schedule? Lucky for you that Zim came. Admit it. You like Zim being around. I make life amazing!'_ He wrote the word 'amazing' again and pointed it to the drawing of himself. With a wide grin Zim passed the note on.

Dib once again bit at his pencil when he read the note. He took one look around the classroom. The same boring room he would usually avoid day in and day out. Only on rare occasions such as today would he actually go through with the class. So many students he tried to avoid who also tried their best to avoid him. Things seemed to be changing lately though since only a couple of days ago.

_'I guess you're right.'_ With only those few words he sent the letter back without even a drawing.

Zim leaned back in his chair as he read that one simple sentence. He hadn't expected such an honest reply from the Dib, something snarky and apathetic yes, but agreeing, no. He fiddled with the ripped bit of line paper in his hands. He was still elated for the agreement about the 'date' Dib gave and thrown a little too left field to really think of any good reply. All he found himself doing was staring at the back of Dib's head in the end, forgetting to send a reply at all.

Feeling no piece of paper slipped near him after awhile, Dib shrugged his shoulders and rested his head back on his desk. The teacher gave him a harsh look for slouching such a way, so he sat up with a groan. He tried his best to pretend to look over his text book, but suddenly the note was bugging him and he wished he hadn't of written what he had.

Then suddenly the little scrap paper came tumbling back over Dib's shoulder.

_'Zim is bored. This is boring. What class is this anyway? I forgot my everything. So I'm bored. Very bored.'_ There were several words starting with a D crossed out. It seemed Zim didn't know how to spell Dib's name. There was even a version with a 'y' in it. _'Make it more interesting.'_ the note went on.

Dib looked over the note inside his text book. A small bit of relief came over him as he did for the simple fact that his words hadn't stopped their note passing.

_'This is History class. I'm surprised the teacher hasn't yelled at you for not having everything.'_ He looked over Zim's words once more. How do you make classtime more interesting? _'Why did you kiss me the other day when I was going to leave?' _Under his words he wrote his name just as it should have been.

Zim looked over the note when he got it back; well, it was entertaining enough. He wrote Dib's name several times in a line just to practice how it was spelled.

_'Human history is dull. Humans are stupid. It is because I am new that I get away with so much. HA HA HA HA HA HA!'_ Zim tried not to cackle on the last part as he wrote it. He then thought over the question. _'Same reason you kissed Zim when you left the skool library and after you drew Zim?'_ Zim blinked and drew up a score board. i _'Dib 02/ Zim 01'_ Quickly he scribbled out the one and gave himself a two. He kissed Dib after Dib kissed him after drawing. He didn't know whose score it was in front of the kids in the cafeteria. Zim just left it at a tie and tossed the note back.

Dib easily caught the piece of paper and looked over Zim's answer. Seeing his name written so many times caused a small smirk to come over his face even if the other's words annoyed him a bit.

_'You're a human too, stupid. Although sometimes I wonder.'_ Next to those words he drew another small little demon with horns sticking out of it's head, wiggly arms, one fang, and swirly eyes. A small heart was drawn next to it's head. _'How long do you think all of this will last?'_ It was an innocent enough question. At least Dib thought so.

When Zim got the paper he huffed at the words and drawing. Quickly he drew a smaller fruit monster breathing lightening with a scythe kind of leaf atop its head. He drew an arrow to it with the word 'Dib'. Finally he wrote back.

_'What will last?'__  
_

The few words Dib saw on the paper when it was given to him caused him to frown. He moved his pencil up the paper and scribbled at the edge, hesitating to answer. Finally after awhile he let his pencil drag down._'...Pretending.'_ He clutched the paper in his fist almost balling it up before he passed it over.

Zim unfolded the paper, tilting his head and pressing his teeth together as he saw that one loosely drawn word. He coloured in the loops of each letter Dib wrote; the 'P', the two 'e's, the 'd' and lastly the 'g'. Even after Zim was done he found it such a depressing question to answer with no real light-hearted answer that would lift that little light pang of guilt for himself; at least it might sate Dib.i _'It has only been three days.'_ /i He wrote underneath it _'You never did ask for anything in return.'_ Zim then folded the note rather neatly. He took it and then slipped it into Dib's shirt collar, though a claw paused to run up the back of Dib's neck before drawing away.

The simple touch caused Dib to shiver before he reached back quickly to grab the note. He looked around to make sure none of the other students were watching, and thankfully everyone was still reading or just paying more attention to the board. His eyes dropped down to the paper that he had set on his desk. Zim's answer caused him to narrow his eyes as if the other boy was right in front of him.

_'I don't need anything. I started doing this to help you get adjusted in Skool. I don't really care.'_ Dib got frustrated at his own words and was about to scribble them all out. Instead he kept them and wrote a little extra under. _'I don't mind being able to feel more at ease around you. Even if you are annoying...'__  
_

When Zim took the note back he frowned at the last sentence. Quickly he scribbled out 'annoying' and replaced it with 'amazing'. _'I guess I could let you stick your tongue in my mouth again.'_ Zim grinned much too widely as he added '_This time I won't run away. Will that make you a happier Dib? I like the metal ball on it. A lot.'_ He underlined the last word a good few times before he sent the note off on its merry way.

The one simple question on the note actually caused Dib to blink his eyes a few times. His mind went back to what happened in the cafeteria and he couldn't help but bow his head as if everyone else knew what he was thinking about right at that moment. Despite the embarrassing thoughts, a small smirk came to his face as he wrote on the paper._'It would make me feel a little better, yes.'_ He tossed the note back while he still kept his head down.

Zim caught the note and opening it caused him to grin much too pleased with himself. He was smooth; had the Dib hooked, so very easily. It truly was a skill. All the same he bit his claw, sucking on the glove tip for a moment as he thought something over. Slowly Zim shook his head and wrote. _'Dib- I want to ask you a question I've asked before. It is very very very important. So I want you to give it some deep Dib thought, and answer honestly. Please.'_ He drew a heart after the please. _'Can you do that for Zim? Yes?'__  
_Zim actually faltered after he wrote, staring down at his poor penmanship. Closing his eyes and exhaling he folded the note and passed it.

Dib took the slip of paper that was slowly becoming very worn down. He opened it up and looked over the words written and the small amused expression that had been on his face fell away. His fingers ran over the words before he finally gave his answer. _'Yes.'_ A small heart of his own was added next to the simple word.

When Zim had the note resting in his hand, the reply staring up at him with that little symbol of affection beside it, he closed his claws over it. He ran his gaze over each person around him, lastly the teacher; no one cared, no one ever did on any planet.  
Zim slumped forward on his desk, pushing himself on hands and arms until his breath rustled Dib's earrings. There he whispered so very quietly, that even Dib had to strain to hear it himself. "If only you knew the world was going to end…what would you do?"

Dib had to stop another shiver from moving through his body much like it had before. His eyes traveled to the side so he could try to get a good look at Zim, but just as quickly he looked back down to his desk so he could think over the question. It was the same thing the other had asked before. Why should he have to answer again? It didn't make any sense. Although, when he thought about the past few days he wasn't really so sure anymore. His own eyes moved up to glance around the classroom then he finally turned his head around to face Zim. He brushed his lips over the other's cheek for a small second before speaking quietly. "I would try to find some way to prevent it as best I could, because if I didn't then where would that leave us?" He just barely pulled away so he could look Zim in the eyes. "Even if we are just pretending..."

Zim let his eyes slip shut as his mouth closed. He wanted to say he expected such an answer, but he didn't. Nor did he expect Dib to act so forwardly in delivering his answer, right in the middle of class. After everything he'd heard from the three girls before, all the info seemed rather moot.  
He gave a rather lazy grin in return, opening his eyes to see Dib looking at him. It was sad really, knowing the planet was truly as doomed as he questioned. But the real truth didn't matter right now, not this second.  
"Doomed. I think." Zim murmured back, his grin spread further.

A small smirk came to Dib's face at Zim's words. He let his eyes scan the class once again. It's not that he cared what the students, or even the teacher for that matter, saw. He had gotten in trouble so many times before he had lost count and the gossip was just noise now, so it didn't matter to him. It was the fact he was still getting used to doing such things. His nerves going away for the moment though, he leaned forward just so he could press his lips against Zim's own.

Zim himself made a small pleased noise in his throat, that those who weren't staring at the scene going on, were now. Zim continued the kiss, ignoring the on lookers who were quite shocked either boy had the gal to do what they were doing right in the middle of class. It definitely got the attention of the teacher who by then had definitely had enough of either boy.

"Dib! And-- n-new boy!" the teacher snapped, nearly snapping the pointer she had in her hands as well. "Stop that!" Her eyes nearly bugged out of her head.

The sudden shout caused Dib to grin a bit against Zim's lips, but he didn't immediately pull away. He continued the kiss for a few more minutes before he actually pulled back, placing a quick last kiss on the other boy's cheek before he turned back around. His eyes dropped down to his book, but he wasn't really able to pay much attention to the words.

The sight had a long suggestive 'uww' from the class after the two parted. A few students howled while other's laughed which only caused the teacher to grow even more angry, shouting for everyone to be quiet. But of course no one listened, and everyone decided to talk about it at once how of all people, Dib decided to make such a bold move with the new student in front of everyone.  
Zim couldn't keep a straight face as he had sat back in his seat. He was grinning like a big idiot, touching his cheek where Dib kissed last. He had no text book or book to bury himself in and instead slid back in his seat, grinning stupidly and waving at all who looked his way. Seems like class _was_ fun after all.

"Dib-!" the teacher stuttered, not knowing the new student's name she decided to take her frustration on someone she was well adverse with in making trouble in her class. "This- _this_ kind of disturbance is disgraceful! You can suck face with the new student on your i _own_ /i time!" She directed her teaching pointer directly at Dib "Understand me?"

Dib quickly looked up as soon as his name was shouted and only half listened to what he was told. One small thing the teacher said did stick with him and caused him to tilt his head. "Really?" He glanced around at all the students that were still staring or just trying to calm their laughter. With a small shrug he moved all of his things off his desk and back into his bag, zipping it up only half way. As soon as he was done he stood up and moved behind to Zim's desk, grabbing the other boy by the wrist before he linked their hands. "Come on then, Zim." With those simple words he led the other teen out of the class. Not able to keep the small grin off his face as he did.

"Yoink!" Zim complacently let himself be pulled away. He gave one last wave to the entire class, teacher included, with a huge grin before he left through the door with Dib.  
Zim could barely keep his ecstatic emotion contained as he followed Dib hand in hand in the hall. "Wow! And it's not even my birthday!" He squeezed the other boy's hand and practically bounced beside him. "That was truly great! Did you see everyone's jaw fall from their skulls!" Zim couldn't keep the amused laughter in. "Did you still want this?" He offered the note they were passing to Dib, all grins.

The entire time Zim was walking and speaking beside him, Dib couldn't help his own bit of laughter. He only stopped walking when the other boy handed over the paper. He let go of Zim's hand just so he could grab at it. Instead of looking it over, Dib stuffed the note in one of his pockets before he stared hard at the shorter teen. After only a few seconds the smirk came back to his face and he started backing Zim up against the lockers nearby, raising his hands and grabbing the other's so he could keep him pinned to the metal. He then moved his face just inches from Zim's own so lips barely brushed as he spoke. "I think I want this more." With those words he finally pushed their lips together, but still kept his hold on Zim's hands.

Zim's chuckle was muffled as he pressed back into the kiss, pressing back against the locker and squirming just a bit enjoying the restraint. His hands clawed a little at Dib's, wanting to move them on instinct, but in the end he let the other keep them hostage. Zim arched towards Dib with a husky sound from his throat at not being able to grab the other closer. So instead he drew up a lithe leg and hooked it around the other's to drag him nearer, leaning his head from the locker to bite at the other's bottom lip.

Dib easily pushed closer to the smaller body, not even trying to put up much of a fight. The small bite at his lip caused him to groan deep in his throat before he darted his tongue out to lick at Zim's teeth. He purposely moved his peircing along each edge before he was forcing his tongue inside much like before. One of his hands clawed its way down a striped arm trying to move the fabric and buckles off, while the other hand still held the other arm captive.

Zim's eyes had rolled back and his eyes fallen shut at the clack of the tongue ring on his teeth. His mouth greedily wanted that piece of metal but his eyes snapped open at the intense hot sensation suddenly entering his mouth. It had him breaking his mouth away on instinct, Dib's tongue piercing clacking his teeth once more. He sucked in a ragged breath, though the air wasn't cool enough to stop the mild burning. With a heavily lidded gaze he looked back at Dib and smirked. "That mouth..-lethal." He managed to pull his free hand up to run through and grab Dib's hair; so many useful uses, hair. "Mine now." Zim yanked Dib's head back down before he had time for argument and pushed his own tongue this time into Dib's mouth to run against the other's, to claim the piercing.

The sudden pull at his hair caused a noise to escape Dib, but it was just as quickly muffled at another press of lips. Feeling that slim tongue in his mouth, he wanted nothing more than to twist his own around it. When Zim curled it around his piercing Dib could only let out a muffled groan at such a sensitive feeling and allow the shorter boy to do as he pleased. His free hand traveled down Zim's body towards his waist just so he could slip it under the other's shirt, wanting to feel the skin there. Instead of keeping Zim's other hand restrained against the locker, he just barely let go so he could link their fingers together against the cool metal.

Zim let a shuddered groan as his back pressed against the cold metal of the locker as Dib's hand dragged up against his skin bringing his shirt with it. It caused him to break just enough from a hot mouth to drink in a heavy ragged breath, though his tongue coaxed Dib's tongue out. His own slithered against Dib's, each taste burned and clouded his already dazed good sense. Zim bit at the other's tongue, clicking his teeth against the piercing which only caused him to whimper for it; despite how uncomfortably mild Dib's mouth was. He slammed his mouth back against Dib's, raking claws through his hair, just so he could thoroughly attack the other's tongue and that piercing. Zim ran his leg along Dib's, arching from the lockers he hooked it around Dib's hips pulling the boy much too close.

By then the two had gotten themselves quite the audience; a few students wandering in their spare blocks, those who had stopped to use the bathroom and the regular skippers. Most gawked, others giggled and whispered in loud voices among themselves.

The harsh bite to his tongue caused Dib to whimper just a bit. His sudden discomfort was ignored and thrown to the back of his mind when he had those lips pressed back against his own once more. This time he didn't hesitate and gave into what he wanted. He let his tongue twist and curl around the other's that invaded his mouth, sucking at it while letting Zim have what he wanted in return. His usual annoyance at having Zim close to him was just the opposite as he let out another muffled sound when the shorter boy pulled him in even more. His hand ran down a slim green stomach, making sure to keep the other's shirt up, while at the same time pushing the skirt dangerously low off hips. Everything behind him was suddenly just background noise in such a moment.

Something smacked Dib hard atop his head. Their history teacher had come out to see why so many of her students suddenly had to go to the bathroom. She tapped her palm with her pointer stick after hitting Dib. "Dib! When I said 'your own time' I meant: OFF SCHOOL GROUNDS!" She poked at either of them. "Go! The skool hall is no place for this kind of public display of affection."

Dib had immediately pulled his mouth away from Zim's at the hit to his head and turned narrowed eyes on his teacher. He was about to mutter his own choice words back at the woman until he saw the amount of kids that were suddenly staring at him. Each pair of eyes caused him to quickly turn his own back to Zim and where his hands were at the moment on the shorter boy. One almost trying to pull down the other's skirt and slip inside, while the other had their hands still gripped much too tightly together. The sight caused his eyes to widen for a split second. Something was seriously wrong with him.

"Sorry." The word came out too quiet for the teacher to really hear, but Dib didn't care. After it was said, he pulled away from the locker while still hanging on to Zim's hand and walked away with the boy at his side, his other hand falling into his own pocket.


	10. Chapter 10

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A back asswards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** moon-glaive

Chapter 10

Eyes were glued on the boys as they walked hand in hand from a crowd worthy scene. Although no one followed them, the word on what had happened did, and it was the hottest news since what happened in the cafeteria. Zim seemed completely, blissfully, ignorant of his surroundings as they wandered down the hall.

"Zzzi- I like personal displays of affection," Zim commented off-handedly in a very happy, dazed voice; a goofy grin was plastered across his face. He stumbled alongside Dib in a poor attempt to follow. So instead, he clung to the Dib's arm, hugging it to his chest while using it as a pillow at the same time. "It makes Zim very happy." As he slipped out his tongue, he noted the cool breeze on his stomach . Glancing down he noticed his shirt had ridden up some how and in one motion he tugged it down. He didn't bother with the skirt. "Zim's mouth is very hot," he went on in the same floaty voice. So he opened his mouth, letting his tongue loll out so he could fan inside.

Dib didn't seem quite as happy as Zim did. His eyes kept roaming over each student that would dare to peek or just outright stare at the two of them. It had his whole body completely tensing up. When Zim clasped onto his arm, he was startled for a moment. He dropped his eyes back down to the shorter boy ready to yell at him, but stopped himself. He saw no real reason to get frustrated with Zim, but wished he could have. Instead, he let his gaze move back to his feet and kept walking until he finally got them both to some sort of freedom. He moved his free hand out of his pocket to open the door that led outside and stepped out, dragging Zim with him. Once the doors were closed he finally let go of Zim's hand and a small groan escaped him. "I can't believe everyone saw that."

"I dooo." Zim said in a sing-song voice. He let go of Dib's arm and slunk to the top step of the stairwell. "I," he hopped down to the next, speaking each word with each step. "had. fun." He spun on the ball of his foot and clicked his heels together to face Dib, hands behind his back in military fashion. "I rather liked it. And I know you did too." Zim glanced down and finally pulled his skirt higher up as proof. He narrowed his eyes and smirked Dib's way.

Dib watched the other with narrowed eyes, but when Zim pulled his skirt up, he blushed lightly. He continued to keep his eyes on the green teen for a few more moments before he finally walked down the steps to stop one step above Zim. He leaned forward and placed his hands on Zim's hips while allowing his face to come close to the other's once more. "You really are annoying." He gave a small smirk of his own. "Stop making everything so complicated."

Zim raised his arms to loosely drape them over Dib's shoulders. "But you like the complications." He pushed himself on tiptoes, but the step Dib was on still made the other too tall. That didn't stop Zim from stretching, making a pleasant sound and giving an excuse to lean forward against Dib. "And if Zim stopped, you'd be bored." A claw toyed with the pierced lock of hair atop Dib's head, giving it a lazy poke so the loop would dance. "And bored is so boring, don't you agree?"

Dib glanced up at his hair before letting his eyes fall back down on Zim. He didn't answer right away; instead, he moved one hand up to push aside Zim's own hair away from his face so he could look into both of the boy's eyes. He made sure to hold the strands aside, knowing that if he let go, it would simply fall back into place like it always did. "I agree." With those simple words he moved down to press a quick, small kiss on Zim's lips, letting the boy's hair fall back down as he did.

Zim's smirk spread into a grinning smile. "Good. See?" He continued to poke at the hair piercing, looking at it for a moment. "You can be quite the charmer when you try." He lowered his hand to rest at the back of Dib's neck. "I quite liked the floaty, disembodied hearts. Though I think the little kissy-doodle was Zim's favorite." He found himself toying with the rings at Dib's ear; it was becoming habit forming.

Dib allowed his eyes to close as Zim played with his piercings. He only gave a small noise in response to the other's words; he was much too content for the moment with Zim's actions. His hand had moved back down to the boy's hip. Both were lightly stroking the green skin under the shirt as something to do in return. "Hmm..." He finally opened his eyes after a few moments and turned them back on the shorter boy. His words almost whispered, "I think I'm starting to like the date idea most of all." His thumb drew circles up and down the other's skin before he finally went on, "How do you still feel about trying it out?"

Zim suddenly bounced. Reminded of the exciting idea, his comfortable lethargy was instantly gone. "Yes! Let's do it! Let's do it right now!" He pulled Dib the rest of the way down the stairs without giving the other time to have any say in the matter.

Zim's sudden excitement startled Dib and almost caused him to trip down the stairs as he was tugged along. "Alright, hold on! Don't pull me! You don't even know where the place is." Despite the annoyance in his voice, it was clear Dib was in too much of a good mood to really be so angry. Such a thing surprised even himself when he thought about it, but he didn't dwell on it too long. Without even waiting for Zim to respond, he squeezed the other boy's hand just so he could yank him closer before wrapping his arms around the slim body from behind, and stopping the other where he stood. "I'm taking you out, not the other way around."

Zim squirmed some at the restraint, very eager, but he stayed. "Aw. I could guess." He leaned back to look at Dib with a guilty grin. "Or I _suppose_ I could let you take Zim. Since the Dibness knows the area better. Is it far? Walking distance? Or do you fly? Can you even operate any land vehicle?" Zim blinked curiously at Dib.

Dib shook his head a bit before he looked back down at Zim's face. "It's not too far. Just a few blocks down. Some of the students go to the place after skool lets out." He continued to keep his eyes on Zim's own for a few more seconds until he finally leaned down and pressed another quick kiss on the boy's forehead. He let go of the other's waist and walked ahead down the sidewalk. "And no, I can't fly any sort of vehicle. Sometimes you ask the weirdest questions."

Zim touched his forehead before quickly following after Dib. "I'm foreign." He placed a hand on his own chest rather proudly. "I'm suppose to ask weirdest and unusual-est questions. It's in my job description." He snatched up Dib's hand, linking fingers before he swung their hands idly as he continued walking, completely all things cheery.

Dib glanced down at their hands for a moment, but made no real protest against the action, only looking up at Zim instead. "You seem way too happy about all of this." He moved his eyes ahead once more, but squeezed Zim's hand. "I didn't expect you to be okay with doing all of this outside of skool. The flirting, the kissing, hanging all over me." Most of that was hypocritical, but he went on anyway. "Sure a few people may see us outside of skool, but it's highly doubtful."

"I think I should have fun outside of skool as well as inside." Zim tilted his head one way causing his hair to cover most of his face. He wagged a no-no finger. "All work and no fun makes Zim bored..and.. on a bun? Something like that. But that isn't the point right now. The point is we are now on a magical adventure." Zim made magical and sparkle noises as he wiggled the fingers on his free hand about. He then looked to Dib. "What do people here talk about on dates anyway? Will anything special happen?"

Dib looked a bit lost for a moment. "Well, um..." He moved his own free hand up to scratch through his hair causing his piercing to jingle. "I think that usually people just talk about things they have in common, or just talk about anything in general. Like getting to know each other." He glanced at Zim for only a second before he averted his eyes once more. "Sometimes people kiss, but that's usually only when the date ends." He gave a small shrug and let his hand fall back down, finding the polish on his nails very interesting in that moment. "My sister watches really mushy, romantic movies sometimes, and I get stuck watching them if I don't feel like staying in my room, and some kind of stuff like that happens. I don't know."

"Mushy eh?" Zim made a thoughtful sound as he tapped his teeth. He then flared the hand out. "What do we have in common? Uhh.. we're human. Ha-ha! Yea." Zim laughed into his hand before clearing his throat. "Gets me every time. Let's see. We umm... oh! We both have black hair." He pointed from his own hair to Dib's. "Uwww. Fancy. We also both have feet, legs, arms, hands. We both breath air, eat food and like to walk." Zim nodded sagely. "We have so much in common!"

Dib rolled his eyes at Zim's words. "No, stupid." The insult was becoming like a nickname for the other. "I mean like interests or things you enjoy. I like to listen to music. Write poetry, as you found out." At that he narrowed his eyes on the shorter boy before going on. "I didn't always like to draw. It was just something I took up in skool and slowly got into." He moved his free hand back up so he could try to count everything on his fingers. "Let's see. I like reading horror novels, but the movies, not so much." He blinked his eyes and looked down at his hand realizing that he only had one finger left. "And I like being able to have my personal space." He nodded his head and turned his attention back to Zim. "Your turn."

Zim stared blankly at the other. He looked the other way and then at his gloved hand. Three fingers and a thumb, at least that was one less he had to name. "Uhhh.. I like.. um. I like.." He looked down at himself. "I like clothes. Fashion! Yeaa. I like that." He looked Dib up and down. "I enjoy your li'l bits of metal in your body. I want one. Oh, yes, yes, I do." He grinned. Though, then he really thought it over. What did he truly like to do? Zim rubbed his chin, narrowing one eye. "I enjoy challenges. Figuring out how to do something no one else can. The faster the results the better. But.. I like to enjoy it, so..sometimes Zim procrastinates a little too much. Hmm. That's three. One more!" He wiggled his thumb in gesture. "I like snacks." Zim looked back to Dib. "Wait. Does that mean we have nothing in common?" Zim pouted.

Dib moved his hand up so he could touch a finger to his eyebrow piercing. Thoughts of their little make out session in the hall and Zim's tongue sucking at the piercing in his own tongue caused a small blush to form on his face. "Um, well, not really." He let his hand fall back down. He looked the other over for a second before a small grin came over his face. "You want one too, huh?" He raised their linked hands up just so he could kiss between their knuckles before continuing on. "You should get one. That way we would have something in common. Too bad you don't want to go to a place around the city. I would take you after we got something to eat. It would be an interesting experience."

Zim was too busy staring at the action Dib made on their hands to make any real answer save for an 'mmhm'. His eyes sifted partially shut and he almost stumbled as he became mesmerized. Quickly he blinked, going a little indignant. "I could do it FAR more cleanly on my own. I wouldn't want to subject any part of my body to those--those monkeys with pointy-things." Zim pointed at his face. "What should Zim get decorated with metal?"

Dib stopped walking, causing Zim to stop with him. He turned to face the shorter boy completely and let his eyes travel over the other's face for a few moments. His free hand moved up so fingers could lightly move over a green cheek. As soon as his hand fell back down, he spoke. "I think you should get your tongue pierced. That's the one part of you I enjoy far too much and can only imagine how much more I would if you did it." Oh, yeah, he was definitely going insane.

Zim's brows rose. It still amazed him how Dib made no motion to ask about his missing ears and nose, considering they were talking about piercings. But that's what he liked about Dib; the boy knew how to not kiss and tell.

A slow toothed grin spread over Zim's face. "You like ma tongue, huh?" He slipped his thin tongue out and licked his ridged teeth. "And only after two kisses." He chuckled low in his throat. Not that there were many places on his body to pierce. "I can think of one other place to pierce on Zim." His gaze sifted half shut as he sent a rather suggestive look to Dib. He started walking again, giving a tug to their linked hands to pull Dib along. "But I'm not telling." He ran his claws through his wig with a teasing laugh.

Another blush threatened to overcome Dib's face even as he was pulled along. Zim's words weren't really helping him keep his thoughts from going in any sort of clean direction. "Pervert." The word was muttered under his breath and could have also been directed at himself, but Zim didn't need to know that.

After awhile they finally made it to a small cafe just near the city. Dib had to tighten his grip on Zim's hand to get the other boy to stop. The outside had small stands for people to sit and enjoy what little peace they could, but at the moment, the tables looked pretty vacant. Dib tightened his hold on the other's hand and led Zim inside the cafe's doors, holding them both open for the shorter teen before he walked in himself.

Zim's eyes darted around at every little thing in the cafe. It was nothing he really had ever seen before, it was very-- _quaint_. Then he decided he had to poke everything, the counter, the glass in front of the display of assorted baked goods, the other tables there and the napkin holders, the one person eating a sandwich, Dib. He blinked when he found himself at Dib, but ended up giving a grin in the end. "It smells..." he inhaled, "sweet. And like food. Swood. Fweet?" He blinked. "Moofies?"

Dib couldn't help but be amused at what he saw. Zim's curiosity was funny, and not aggravating like it usually was. As soon as he had the other's attention once more, he turned Zim around by wrapping his arms around the smaller boy, and walked him over to the counter that was up front. "Of course it smells like food. I told you they serve food here." He raised a hand away from the other's waist so he could point up to the menu that was above the counter. "See, no moofies, but plenty of other things. You can also try coffee as well."

Zim looked up at the menu but stared blankly at it. It was completely alien to him. What the heck was a grilled cheese sandwich? Cheese made of grills? This race was just strange.  
"I want coffee." Zim nodded slowly before looking at Dib. "Is it sweet? I like sweet things." He looked back to the menu before looking back at Dib, then back to the menu and back at Dib. "You choose for me. Surprise Zim!" He leaned against Dib's front, slipping his arms around the other's waist. "But I want a cookie too. Oh! And a muffin. Zim wants a muffin." He stood up on tiptoes to sweetly lick the tip of Dib's chin, asking just as sweetly, "Can Zim have a muffin?"

The sudden lick surprised Dib, but only for a second. "Hmm, sure, you can have a muffin and a cookie." He let his eyes travel back up to the menu and scanned over it trying to figure out something for the both of them. Without really thinking his arms squeezed lightly around Zim's waist. "As for coffee, well, it's sweet when you add just the right stuff to it. It's not that great without anything in it." He made a small face at a few of the things his eyes ended up scanning over.

Zim quietly cackled to himself. "I will breed the cookie and muffin to create the ultimate treat. I will rule the planet with my army of super-tasty moofies! Mmmm moofies." He glanced around. "I wanna sit there." Zim pointed outside to a table near some ferns. There was no one outside, so it seemed like the better place to sit. "I'm going to go sit. Come back when you've picked stuff." He stood on his tiptoes again to steal a kiss before he pulled away. "No running away, okay?" Zim got about two steps before he came back for another kiss. Finally he pulled away to go outside to sit. He wanted to go poke the fern.

The first kiss didn't surprise Dib as much as the second. It caused him to reach up and actually make sure it had happened. After only a few seconds, though, he quickly turned back around to the menu to figure things out once again. "I'm a moron."

It took awhile before the cafe doors finally opened and Dib came out with a large tray. He searched the tables until he finally found the one the other boy was near. Making his way over, he then set the tray down. He took one of the cups off and set it on Zim's side of the table, along with his desired muffin and cookie. He also passed over a thick sandwich that had bacon, lettuce, and tomato on it as well, as a few other things. "There, try that." With those words, Dib sat down on his side of the table and started poking at his soup even though his eyes were on Zim.

Of course Zim was far more interested in what Dib had than what he was given. "What is that?" He pointed at the soup. "It looks evil, and diabolical. Is it sentient? Because I have never seen a puddle of goo that doesn't want to destroy something.. or.. consume something with its gooey flesh." Zim then noticed his muffin and cookie. "Yay!" He ripped the top of the muffin off and replaced it with the cookie. "Moofies!" He then placed the muffin top on the cookie. "There! Now my cookie has a severed muffin hat."

"It's clam chowder. You watch too many movies, I'm guessing." Dib watched Zim's actions with a raised brow. "Didn't your parents ever teach you not to play with your food?" The question was teasing and he couldn't help the small grin that tried to pull at his lips before he took in a spoonful of his soup.

Zim made a face as he watched Dib actually put the soup in his mouth for consumption. "Bahh." He shook his head as he raised the top of the muffin to sniff, despite having no nose. "My parents? No. I don't have parents." He realized the information came streaming from his mouth. His eyes snapped wide and he shoved the muffin top in his mouth to keep anymore great words from coming out. Then he realized what he'd done, but on chewing, he realized the Earth muffin wasn't so bad. In fact... "Iz good!" he commented in awe with a mouth full of muffin. Promptly swallowing, he chomped on the cookie and was even more elated as he chewed. "This is really good too!"

Dib blinked his eyes at the information he had gotten out of the other boy. He moved his spoon out of his mouth and let it drop back into his bowl. "No parents?" For some reason he couldn't seem to get over that simple fact and pressed further. "If you don't have any parents then who do you live with? Who moved here with you?" He stirred his soup around, refusing to take another bite until Zim answered.

"I-live-on-my-on." Zim quickly spoke as he bit a rather large portion of his cookie to chew on for a good while. Though it was meant to procrastinate he couldn't help the happy little noises as he chewed; it really was that good. He needed more of these Earth cookies, and muffins, to send off to his Tallest. Tallest Miyuki would definitely love some foreign snacks; it was an Irken weakness.

Dib's eyes widened at that. "You're fifteen and you're living by yourself?" He realized he had let go of his spoon somewhere amidst his shock and quickly picked it back up. His eyes dropped down to his bowl and narrowed a bit. "Lucky. I wish I had such freedom. No parents, not even a sibling, that sounds like paradise." He stirred his soup a bit more before finally moving the spoon to his mouth once more. After he had swallowed the small bit, he spoke up again. "Strange, though. I thought you had to live with someone until a certain age." He shrugged his shoulders. "Whatever."

"The.. uh.. government is.. on fire. Um. I'd rather not go into it." Zim turned the cookie this way and that as he watched it. "Personal." He shoved the rest into his mouth, chewing diligently as he unwrapped the bottom part of the muffin so it too could be consumed. When his mouth was empty he spoke again, "I can't complain. I get a lot of work done unhindered. It's nice and quiet so I can think. Nice neighborhood. But it is a bit dull living on my lonesome. I guess that's why I go to skool." Zim laughed at that. "Well, the one class Zim went to was _quite_ interesting. I wonder if all the rest will be as entertaining." With a grin he bit into the muffin.

Dib raised his eyes once more to look at Zim, and kept them there for a few moments until he spoke. "You did make things much more bearable this time around." He let go of his spoon so he could take a quick sip of his coffee, mostly just wanting a reason to hide his face after such a comment, and the one he was about to make. "I could deal with class if things turn out like that all the time."

Zim cackled and nodded, though, he paused as he watched Dib drink his coffee. He pointed to the cup. "What does it taste like?" He looked over to his own cup and pulled it nearer to sniff it. "Kinda smells like.. dirt."

Dib tried not to laugh at that because it was hard to disagree. He carefully set his cup down instead and gave a small smile as he tried to control himself. "Well, mine tastes like vanilla. I just got them to add normal sugar and milk to yours because I wasn't sure what you would like." He pointed a finger at Zim's cup. "If you like it you can always come back and try other things." With that he went back to his meal, but kept his gaze on the other teen.

Zim continued to sniff his cup and made a slight face at it, as if it could do it back. He picked it up tentatively and took a small sip. Immediately his eyes snapped open and he put the cup down. He clapped his hands over his mouth and made an odd squeaking noise.

The reaction caused Dib to sit up straight and drop his spoon once again. "Zim?" He moved his eyes to the cup then back at the other. "Was it still too hot?" Without even waiting for the Zim to answer he reached his hand out to place it around the cup. It didn't feel nearly as hot as it had when he first took it off the tray. That fact caused him to let out a thoughtful sound and turn concerned eyes back on the other as he pulled his hand back. "You okay?"

Zim slowly dropped his hands from his mouth. "H-h.. Spicy!" He sucked in several gulps of air and fanned his mouth. "Hot. Hot. Hot. Hot." He waved both hands and let out a long exerted exhale, finally letting them drop. His shoulders sagged and he blinked watery eyes. "It tastes like hot sweet dirt." Zim smacked his lips, letting his head loll from the experience.

Dib watched Zim for a few more minutes with narrowed eyes. After a while he slowly leaned forward across the table, being careful of their food and such. He used one hand to prop himself up and the other to grab Zim's chin straightening the other's head and opening his mouth. Once he had accomplished that he blew the tiniest bit of air into Zim's mouth before he closed it and planted a small kiss on his lips. He let go of the other's chin and sat back in his chair, leaning his head on his hand. "You alright now?"

Zim open and closed his mouth and in the end, of all things, turn his gaze shyly away with a small grin and a nod. He bit his lip and licked it. With a blink he licked his lips again. "Mm. I think your coffee tastes like better dirt than mine." He glanced at Dib, though keeping under the veil of dark hair. "Can Zim try yours?" He nervously chewed on the pointed end of his gloved finger.

Dib glanced down at his own cup before he shrugged his shoulders. "Sure." The hand he had been leaning on was used to pass the cup over setting it down in front of the other. In turn he grabbed Zim's cup and took a sip from it, making a small disgusted face after. "It's so gross without any flavor." He set the cup back down and started stirring his soup once more before raised his eyes back to Zim.

Zim pouted a scowl Dib's way. "You gave me gross coffee." He stuck his tongue at the other before he picked up the cup. He gave it a sniff. "Uw. Smells nice. Smells like.. vanilla-y dirt." This time Zim blew on the coffee before he took a sip. Blowing on it made no difference, the coffee temperature itself was cool but the taste made his mouth heat up. It was a lot like Dib's mouth when Zim really thought about it. At least this tasted sweeter. Zim swallowed with a noise and smacked his mouth a few times. One eye suddenly snapped open, and the other followed. A rather demented grin crept across Zim's face and he tugged the mug possessively to his chest. "This is Zim's now."

Halfway between trying to swallow a spoonful of soup, Dib gave a pout at the other's words. He dropped his spoon back down and waited until he could actually talk to speak. "Hey, that's not fair." His words slowly died as he watched Zim hold the cup so tightly. He narrowed his eyes behind his glasses and quickly looked back down at the coffee he had stolen from Zim. He wasn't very interested in drinking that, but he didn't have much money to be wasting on another cup for himself. The place wasn't the cheapest. With a defeated sigh, he glanced back at Zim with slumped shoulders. "Fine, have it."

Zim jabbed a finger at his old cup. "You can have that. I'm having this. Mine. Zim is drinking this. This is Zim's. I like this. I want another. I want five! No- thirty! No! Wait-" Zim leaned forward. "What's the highest number in the English language? That's how many I want!" He leaned back and took a much longer sip than he took, ending it with a sharp gasp. His grin only grew wider as he closed his eyes sated. "It's like.." He opened one eye to glance at Dib. "What's the best thing ever in the English language?"

A blush came to Dib's face at such a question and he quickly looked back down. "I don't think I want to answer that." He stayed silent for a few moments before he chanced a glance back up at Zim. "I don't think you need too many of those. You're usually hyper enough as is." He shook his head. "I shouldn't have let you try it."

Zim hissed as he clutched the mug protectively to his chest. "You no taking my sweet dirt soup from me. You-- you drink your funny white soup." He pointed to Dib's clam chowder before clutching the cup again. He glanced at Dib before he took another swig of coffee. "Ahhh." His tongue lolled out. "So good. Next time I want a bucket full." Zim glanced to Dib. "Do they serve it in a bucket? Or does Zim have to bring his own?"

"A bucket?" Dib blinked his eyes at such a question and then quickly shook his head. "N-No, there's no such thing as buckets full of coffee, Zim." He pointed his spoon at the other teen. "And you certainly can't bring your own." He let his spoon fall back into the bowl. "If you like it so much just come back and get some more." He averted his eyes and looked around as if someone was listening in on their conversation at that moment. "I-If you want, and when I get more money, I can bring you back here. I'll buy you some more then." He quickly scooped up some soup and put the spoon in his mouth right after he spoke.

Zim's crazed, caffeinated front seemed to fall for a moment as he blinked at the other curiously. "Another date?" He took another sip from the cup.

Dib's free hand moved out to run along the cup he had taken from Zim. His teeth bit at the spoon every few seconds and a few times his piercing clacked against it, metal on metal. "Sure, another date." He finally raised his eyes to look at Zim. The spoon having moved away from his mouth just enough so he could answer.

Zim closed his mouth. He sat back enough in the chair so he could bring up his legs, resting the heels of his boots on the edge of the seat. On his knees he rested the mug but he glanced away from Dib; though for other reasons than the other boy thought. "W-when? Do you think?" Zim's eyes darted back; his nerves felt so on edge all of a sudden for some reason.

Dib continued to trace the edge of the cup for a bit before he let his hand fall back down. "Whenever you're free." He gave a small shrug and turned his eyes back down to what was left of his soup. "You don't really tell me much about yourself, so, I'm not sure when you're busy. I don't do much, so I'm pretty much good for any time." His fingers tapped on the table for a few seconds before he spoke up once more. "I don't mind taking you out again whenever you want."

Zim let out a small laugh. "As exciting as Zim is, I'm always free. Nowhere to go, and nowhere to be." A more absolute lie couldn't come from his mouth. "What you see is what you get." Correction: that was. He drabbled his claws on the mug's sides and took another sip, still fidgeting after.

Dib looked back up after Zim's words and gave the smallest of smiles. "Well, that's good to know." He almost tensed up after what came out of his mouth, but instead averted his eyes. "We could go out during the weekend. It's nice going out after skool since no one else is around, but we've also already seen each other. No real point." He took in another small spoonful of his soup before he went on, "I could actually pick you up like a normal date does at your house." His hand moved up off the table to fidget with his ear. "At least I think that's how it goes. I'm pretty sure it does."

Zim crossed one lithe leg over the other but still managed to keep both boots draped off the edge of the chair; he was thin enough to get away with it. He gave a slight shrug. "I wouldn't know." He ran this thumb on the lip of the mug. "I've never dated before." Immediately he bit his loose tongue; the coffee was getting the better of his conscious judgment. "Not.. -not formerly, anyway. I mean properly. I mean.. No. Er- yes.." He gave up and just downed more coffee.

Dib quickly looked back up at such a stuttered answer. The last few things Zim said caused him to narrow his eyes in a small bit of anger; he really didn't know why. "Hmm..." He looked back down after such a small sound, but suddenly he didn't have much of an appetite. "So, you've liked someone before?" He didn't know why he asked. It shouldn't have mattered to him.

Zim stared at Dib for a moment before looking into his cup. When did the moment become so somber? Or maybe that was just him who felt that horrid feeling tugging at the back of him. "Y-yea. S-someone _sss_, actually." He looked back up at Dib and cracked a bit of a smirk. "But you'll never guess who wants to bear your love spawn, Dibness. She even likes your feel bad poetry too. Very 'romantic' she called it. Said she'd steal you up if I didn't want you."

Dib's hand had clenched tightly at Zim's answer, but otherwise he tried to keep any sort of emotion off his face. The only thing that startled Dib out of his sudden mood was Zim's words. It had him tilting his head just barely as a confused expression came over his face. "You're right, I never will guess. Who?"

Zim grinned. "Zita." And he downed the rest of his coffee at that.

Dib's eyes snapped open. That wasn't really an answer he was expecting. Zita was someone he had known for a few years from different classes, but had never actually been close to. He was always sure she hated him just as much as he hated her. "Z-Zita?" He felt he needed to echo the name to make sure it was true. His eyes moved back down to the table and for a few moments all he could do was stare. After a bit he pushed his bowl away with a disgusted expression on his face and shook his head. "She must be inhaling something she shouldn't be to say all of that."

Zim uncrossed and clunked his boots back on the ground and plunked the cup with much energy onto the table. He cleared his throat and tried to do his best Zita impression; it wasn't all that good "'I'll take him if you don't want him, Zim!' 'Just because I think he's weird doesn't mean I can't try to like him. Especially if he's so willing to draw pictures of whoever he likes, or even write about them.'" Zim chuckled as he rubbed his hands together before continuing, "'It's really romantic, if you think about it.'" He shrugged out his hands. "And she likes tall males too. So do I, but I never liked those who were taller than myself. And Zim is pretty tall where he comes from." Zim nodded, very proud of that fact.

Dib glanced back at the other teen out the corner of his eyes at the last few things he said. He didn't keep his attention on Zim long though, and soon his eyes were moving out to look at the street. "I guess when this is all over she'll have a chance at me then, won't she?" He scratched at the side of his head and gave a small snort. "I doubt she would still be interested though. It's not like she really is anyway." He let his eyes fall to the cement that was under his feet. "Try and like me, that's so stupid."

".. I like you." Zim poked at the sandwich Dib had given him; the Earthian vegetation didn't look particularly appetizing.

Dib sat up straight at what Zim said, which caused his chair to make a loud, grating noise against the cement. For awhile all he could do was stare at the other boy until he learned how to blink again, and finally his voice came back. "What?"

The sudden movement startled Zim and he blinked to stare at Dib, a little confused, as he thought he spoke loud and clear. "Huh?"

Dib shook his head at the response he got and his eyes landed back on Zim's face. "You like me?" One of his hands moved onto the table so he could tap his fingers, suddenly feeling very fidgety. "Why?"

Zim straightened a moment, but went back to poking the sandwich. He took off the top bread to peer at the underneath. "Why not?" he simply countered. He then poked at the bacon there.

Dib looked back down to the cement at that question, his fingers still tapping. "Because all of this is just going to end at some point. That just means I'll go back to not caring and you'll go off and do whatever it is you want to do." His fingers finally stopped as he went on. "Some of the kids are talking to you. You seem to be a little popular. You might not need me anymore sooner than you think." He moved his arms so he could rest his elbows on the table and moved one hand up to lift his glasses off his face while the other rubbed between his eyes, wishing that would make his frustration go away. "It doesn't matter."

Dib was right, but for all the wrong reasons. But the human was right: it didn't matter. And it didn't. Not really. Zim dropped the top bread to his sandwich back down and dusted his hands off. He raised his brows and pouted expectantly. It wasn't a look he should have been giving Dib right now. "You don't like Zim?"

It should have been simple for Dib to say no to the other boy, and to just say that he hated Zim much like he had on the street that one day. As he continued to stare at Zim, he set his glasses back in place, and realized that things didn't seem to want to be that simple for him anymore. "Yeah, I do." After he spoke, he quickly picked the cup up so he could take a sip and almost spat it back out. Not only was the coffee disgusting, it was cold from sitting so long. He endured it though if only for some way to hide his face.

Whether Dib saw it or not, Zim seemed pleased with the answer he got, and he showed no worry or malice in his expression. He pushed the sandwich Dib's way, since the boy seemed so eager to consume the contents in the table; or to hide in them. "You want my sammich? You look like you want it. You have that 'I want Zim's sammich' look in your eye."

Dib placed the cup back down with a small gagging noise, and looked towards the sandwich offered to him. He only gave a small glance Zim's way before he reached a hand out to pick it apart much like the other had. When he got to the bacon, he immediately took the strips and chewed on them. Only after his mouth wasn't full did he speak up, "So what does it mean if we like each other? Does that mean what was pretend suddenly isn't?" He tried to make the question sound innocent enough, but it just wasn't working.

Zim drummed his fingers on the table; it was hard to keep still and focused. In the end he stared blankly at Dib; he didn't follow. "Huh?"

"All of the things we've been doing," Dib started to speak while he pulled his hand away from the sandwich, not really in the mood for much else on it. "The kissing, and the other small intimate things." He raised his eyes to look at Zim. "If we like each other, does that mean instead of pretending for all the kids at skool, and even out here, we just really...want to do those things?" His last few words slowly trailed off, and he looked back down at the table. He didn't know how his question could sound innocent that time.

Zim straightened in his seat and for the moment his drumming stopped. His line of sight tried to fall on whatever it was Dib was looking at on the table, but he couldn't stop and stare at just one thing; his nerves wouldn't let him. "The Dib..-wants to be Zim's _real_ boyfriend?" He finally raised his gaze to Dib.

Dib narrowed his eyes and tried to flick a crumb that was sitting on the table. He missed, which only caused him to let out a small noise before he answered. "I didn't say that..."

Zim let out a frustrated noise, more because he was jittery with no real aim. "Then what are you saying? Because Zim has only been speaking English for about three days now, and isn't as fluent in the language like you. So be to the point." He blinked, he didn't mean to be so forward and callous. Zim shook his head and rubbed his arms. ".. I'm not used to this coffee thing either. I feel like a squirrel whose eaten forty bags of sugar in one sitting. I-. Mm.. sorry."

Dib glanced back up at the apology before a small frown came to his own face. He watched Zim for a few more seconds until finally he leaned over the table. Instead of propping himself up, he used both hands to grab at Zim's so he could pull them onto the table causing the other boy to lean forward. He touched their forehead's together and gave a shaky sigh before he spoke up, "I-if that was what I said, if I wanted you to really be my boyfriend, what would you say?"

Zim went a little rigid at first but he tried his best to relax. He smiled some, though it was rather sadly, at their hands. He tapped the table with a pinky and his smile grew wider and all the more sad. "I-...I... uh." There were too many answers to such a small question that had so much importance to one, but meant nothing to another. That's what made it so sad. Whether to live a happy lie in ignorance until the end or to end it now, rip it fast and painless like a band aid.  
Zim swallowed slightly. "I d-dunno." He gave a small, giddy laugh. "I'd have to wait to tell you that. Cuz Dib hasn't asked me yet." He glanced a little nervously at the other.

The way Zim spoke only caused Dib to become even more nervous. He let go of one of the boy's hands so he could raise one of his own and push back Zim's stubborn hair for the moment. The entire time he never pulled away from the other. "Will you be my real boyfriend?" His other hand squeezed the one he still held tightly. "No more pretending."

"So.. that means.. all the times the Dib said it didn't matter, it did." Zim leaned his head some into the hand that held his hair back. A wry smile started on his face. "And all the times the Dib said he didn't care, he did. And all the times the Dib said 'don't touch me', and he didn't want to hug, cuddle, snuggle, grope, lick, fondle, poke, hang out, carry, hold hands with Zim- he did." Zim leaned forward more. He had the Dib hooked and reeled in. How sad, that someday this would have to end, maybe tomorrow- at most a week. His Tallest wouldn't stand for longer. "I'm guessing," Zim pressed his head more against Dib's hand as he went on, "he liked it. A lot. To be asking."

Dib's fingers had slowly started to stroke Zim's cheek as the other boy leaned closer and closer into his hand. Each word caused him to tense up bit by bit, and the nervous feeling in his stomach to just get worse. "Well, not at first." He didn't know why he whispered the words, but he knew he didn't feel like speaking very loud at that moment. "At first everything I said I really meant, but it's weird how you're the only one that could get under my skin so much." He gave only the smallest smirk at that. "Everyone else I would just ignore, or act as if they didn't exist at all. I couldn't do that with you; you just wouldn't let me." He moved his eyes over Zim's face for a few seconds before he went on. "So, yeah, I guess I do want it all. Every bit of it."

Zim blinked slowly, his grin slow and lazy because of the fingers at his cheek. "In such a short time." He slunk forward more so he could brush the briefest of kisses against Dib's lips. "I told you I liked a challenge. The circumstances were in Zim's favor, I guess. Luck? Maybe." Zim's lips turned up just a little more. "I hope so." He pressed his lips again to Dib's.

Dib couldn't help grinning against the kiss. As much as he tried to keep it innocent and quick, he couldn't help pushing his tongue out a bit to trace the other's lips. Even going so far as to let his piercing press down a bit just to tease before he completely pulled away. His hand that had been holding Zim's hair back finally fell down to the table causing the hair to fall back to it's usual place as well. Dib didn't mind much as he kept his eyes on what he could see of the other's face. "I guess that means yes?" He pressed another quick kiss to Zim's lips after he spoke, pulling back enough after so the other could answer.

Zim couldn't help but raise a hand to touch his own lips for a second. He then moved his hand to Dib's brow piercing, to toy with it a bit. "Y-yea. I guess it does. Yes." He chuckled rather shyly. What could it hurt? "Though Zita will be pretty disappointed." He couldn't help adding with a teasing grin.

Dib closed his eye at the touch, but didn't pull away. Instead he leaned into it. With Zim's few words, all of the worry he suddenly had slowly went away with a small breath of air. The last bit only had him letting out a tiny laugh that he really couldn't keep in. "I'm sure she'll get over it. She was doing fine without me before; she can survive without me even longer."

Zim glanced at the brow piercing he toyed with. "I guess that would make this a _real_ date." He smirked some and followed his first impulse and leaned forward so he could flick his tongue at the piercing. After he looked back at Dib with a grin.

The one eye Dib had closed quickly snapped open after a small shudder had went through his body. As much as he tried to hold it in, he couldn't stop the small noise that escaped him even as he kept his eyes on Zim's own. "Y-Yeah." His voice was much too shaky and he quickly tried to steady it. "Yeah, it is." A small smile came to his lips. "Which means when I pick you up for our next date, that one will be real as well. We'll actually be going out because we both want to see each other." He ran his nails over Zim's hand for a second before he went on. "I like that idea, don't you?"

Zim pursed his lips and blinked a few times. "That means we're.." he twirled a finger trying to find the word "_dating_." He straightened a moment and tapped a claw on Dib's lips a moment. "Excuse Zim for one moment." Zim leaned back and stood away from the table. He walked away a few good steps from the other table and started bouncing around making happy, squealing noises. He threw his arms up in the air and jumped around shouting out his elation, like the caffeine-endorsed crazy that he was.

Dib sat back in his chair just so he could watch the sudden display. It was way too amusing and even if someone were to walk by on the street or come out of the cafe, he wouldn't have cared. After a few moments passed by he found that it probably wasn't a good idea to let Zim continue hopping around. He was getting dangerously close to the ferns. So, with much regret, Dib got up from the table and walked over to the hyper teen only to wrap his arms around his waist from behind trying to hold the other body still. "I don't think caffeine is good for you." He said the words in a teasing voice while he nuzzled Zim's cheek.

"Awww. But I like it." Zim wiggled and squirmed against Dib, as he still felt the new onslaught of new energy. "I want another cup. Can Zim have another cup? He neeeds another cup. Give him another. He'll never shut up unless you do." He rolled his eyes and waved a limp-wristed hand. "You know that Zim. He's such a squash. Or was it yam." Zim tapped his lips looking over to Dib. "What's a yam? Is that short for anything? Yamama-bama..-ma. And does it taste good with coffee?" He whined. "_Please_ more." Zim then tried to tilt his body and crane his head so he could try and nab a kiss to help his cause.

Dib ducked the kiss only to stick his tongue out at the shorter boy. "No, yams do not taste good with coffee." He turned Zim around in his arms and planted a quick kiss on the other's forehead just to aggravate him. "I'll get you one more cup and that's it. Just one, but we're not staying. It's just to go." He ran his hands up the sides of Zim's shirt as he kept speaking. "I can't buy much else after that anyway."

Zim leaned heavily against Dib's front with a huff. "Can it be in a bucket then? A coffee bucket-to-go! I could really go for a bucket of coffee right now." He sagely nodded, though it was easy to tell he was complacent with whatever Dib would buy him. Then it dawned on him. "If it's to go, where are we going?"

"A small museum that's much farther down." Dib rested his chin on top of Zim's head which caused his attention to turn on what was inside the cafe window. "It's a nice place and has a lot of interesting stuff. Plus, I'm sure not all of the books you've read are the most informative, right? The place I'm going to take you to will help out much more. It has things about the city as well as other places." He moved his head back a bit so he would be able to look down at Zim and gave the other a curious stare. "That is, if you still need help. If not, I could find somewhere else to take you."

Zim met Dib's gaze. "Huh? Oh! Zim's essay." He gave a short laugh and then let his tongue loll out of his mouth. "Pfffft. That isn't due for, like, everness." He waved a hand. "Besides, why mix work with pleasure?" Well that was the most hypocritical statement he could have made; added to the growing pile of today's. "Let's do something new and adventurous. Something amazing! Something newventurazing!" He splayed a hand out. "And you do know this planet better than I." He poked Dib's belly, but then found new interest in that belly button ring there; Zim was easy to please.

"Something amazing and that I can afford." Dib let a small grin cross his lips at that last part. His eyes dropped down to Zim's hands and for some reason still found it odd how the other boy loved to fiddle with the one piercing so much. "Well, as much as I hate to say it, there's a carnival that's been going on near the other end of the city. I think it only has a few days left." He lifted one of his hands away from Zim's side so he could count his fingers under his breath. After a few moments he returned his eyes to the other's face and let his hand drop back down. "After I get you another cup of coffee I should be able to get us both some tickets. Maybe even a few snacks." He gave a small smile. "You could ride some of the rides if you've never had a chance to so something like it before."

Zim's eyes snapped wide to stare up at Dib. "Zim likes snacks. Zim likes rides. And Zim likes coffee. It's win, win, win! And Zim likes to win!" He clung to Dib's shirt and wiggled excitedly since he couldn't bounce or move around. "Let's do it! Let's do it, do it, do it, do it, do it!" He bounced on his toes in Dib's arms. He threw his own arms around the other's middle and clung tightly. "Because it is your fated destiny to take Zim."

Dib tried to keep steady since Zim was moving around so much in his arms, but soon gave up and let go considering Zim had such a tight hold on him anyway. "Alright, I'll take you." He let his hands raise up and placed them both on either side of the other's face, trying to calm Zim down a bit so he could continue speaking. "First, let's go get your coffee. After that we can leave here and head towards the carnival. It shouldn't be too packed. It's not that late."

"That's because everyone is eating lunch from that disgusting trough called a cafeteria. Skool. Bleh. How vile." Zim slipped away from Dib, clicking heels together he pointed to the cafe. "So hurry and get so we can go, go, go, go." He bounced on his toes again, feeling like he should be running several blocks to a bridge to jump off, flap his arms and fly away; nyrrrrrrooow.

"Okay, I'm going." Dib moved forward and leaned down so he could press a kiss to Zim's lips. Satisfied with that, he finally moved back to the table only to pick up everything that was left behind and set it back on the tray. After he made sure he had it balanced, Dib walked back towards the cafe doors, but not without stealing another kiss from Zim. After that, he finally made his way back inside.

Zim rocked from heel to toe and back again unable to keep still, especially after the last kiss. He watched Dib bring the tray in and buy the coffee. And that's when Zim's eyes settled on IT; the other coffee Dib had bought him. Sweet sweet sweet dirt. Zim's eyes flicked to Dib; he was busy buying the new coffee. Down his gaze flicked to the coffee on the table. On impulse he stepped over to the table and grabbed the cup. It was stone cold, but all the same he chugged it down, thudding the cup down with a hard exhale. His eye snapped open. "Hot! Hot! Hot! Boiling in my mouth!" He fanned his mouth and gasped for air, spattering and raspberrying. He ran around flailing and screaming obscenities, almost knocking over the nearby ferns.


	11. Chapter 11

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta ** Kayla Riddle

Chapter 11

Children screamed and cried much too loudly in the run-down, flashy place which was the city's carnival. All around were rides that looked much too big to really fit on such a small space chosen for the event. Some rides that went around, some that went up and down - one that completely dropped. That one seemed to scare a lot of parents until it actually went back up.

The few people that weren't waiting in line for their thrills were waiting in line to grab at the only goodies they could get at such a place. So much junk food that some of the sickness around may have been caused by that, instead of the rides.  
The whole place caused Dib's good mood from earlier to suddenly go downhill. It wasn't the type of place he liked to hang around, but once he paid for the tickets he really had no choice in the matter. He was about to speak up and ask Zim if he might have changed his mind, but a small child decided that moment to run screaming, as loud as he could, past him. That one thing caused Dib to cringe and grit his teeth.**  
**

"I'd suggest stabbing it with a stick and deep frying it but-- it looks sticky." Zim peered past Dib, clinging to the boy's arm since they'd gotten in; not that it kept him still since they'd been walking. "And diseased." he added, sounding more serious than joking. Zim didn't stop there though, his eyes darted left, right, up, down, and diagonal at all degrees. He pointed at almost every sight and light with a captivated 'uuuw!'. "I like that. And that. Oh! That's pretty! And so is that! I wanna try those, those, those and that! But not that -- that's just stupid." He went back to clinging to Dib's arm after pointing.

Dib tried his best to relax, but it really wasn't working. Every bit of noise was annoying him, even as he turned his head to try and give Zim his attention. "Well, we can try whatever you want. You should probably choose what has the smallest line first." He moved his eyes back to each ride. Earlier he had said the place wouldn't be packed, but he hadn't thought of how long the walk would take. Add on one teenager that was hyped up on coffee. It had made Dib's time getting them there much harder.

"That one! No- that one! No-- those! Oh! THOSE! Oh-no- that ride!" Zim blinked as he tilted his head. "Wait-a-tick." A lot of those whirly, movey-shakey rides looked like simulators and training rides from the academy. In all honesty he'd been in far more dangerous rides just training to be an invader. The sweet nostalgia put a wide grin on Zim's face, as he clasped both hands on one of Dibs to pull the boy to a rather whirly-twirly-spinny ride. "This one first!"

Dib's eyes widened as he was pulled along. "Zim!" The name came out almost as a squeak. "Zim, I really don't want to. I'm not much for rides." He knew the other boy wasn't paying any attention to him. If anything it would have been amazing if Zim could even hear him over the crowds and most of the noise around. As he was yanked he brushed against some of the people that were trying to push by and it caused him to let out an annoyed sound. "Zim..." He whined the name that time, and only stopped when he was finally able to catch up with the other.

The green boy pouted when he heard the arguing and whining finally. "The Dib said I could try whatever ride I wanted." He smoothed the fabric on Dib's chest, but it was more to play with the chains there. Zim peeked up through hair. "Didn't you." He stood up on his tip toes so he could touch his pouted lips to Dib's. "Unless you wanted to go on something more tame, like the squiddy-kiddy ride?" He pointed a claw over to a small merry go round for toddlers of eerie smiling cartoony sea animals; two happy kids clinging onto their rides while another cried big fat screaming tears.

Dib darted his eyes over to the small ride and let out a sigh which moved across the other's lips. He dropped his eyes back down to Zim and tried his best to narrow them in some form of anger at the shorter teen, but it just wasn't working out. In the end he finally cracked. "Fine, I'll go on the ride with you. It doesn't mean I have to like it, though." With those words, he raised a hand up to take the one which was playing with his chains, and pulled his lips back so he could press a kiss to Zim's knuckles.

The other made a happy noise at that. "I'll even let you hold Zim's hand." He wiggled his fingers of the hand Dib had in gesture. "Feel honored my stabby faced, belly laser shooting boyfriend. Not everyone can do that!"

Zim tugged Dib by the hand he held over to the line up. "Be a man!… or… something of the pep-talking sort that guys give to each other." Said the boy in a skirt. Then again, he'd had his butt kicked by many a girl; and his ruler was a female to boot. Irken just weren't chauvinistic; at least the smart ones weren't.

Dib gave the smallest groan as he was tugged into the line. His eyes scanned the people ahead of them, and thankfully there weren't too many. That one fact had him quickly looking behind, knowing that at any moment more people would be ready to pile up in back. His free hand moved up to reach around Zim's waist, pulling the shorter boy close to his chest as he turned his head back around to face the front. "I'm not much for pep-talks. They're not really my thing." He tried his best to smile, but it came as more of a weak smirk. "This is just me dealing with the situation."

Zim tweaked his lips at that and then gave a thoughtful sound. Leaning up against Dib, he reach up to run the tips of his claws against the piercings on the other's ear; Dib always seemed to like when he toyed with the earrings. He fiddled with the one on Dib's bottom lobe gently. "Better?" Zim grinned.

Dib closed his eyes for only a small second before he answered. "Much." He leaned his head down just enough to place a kiss on Zim's cheek, but made sure not to pull away from the other's hand. "See, I didn't need a pep-talk." He spoke the words against the green skin. "I just needed a little of your help." He let one of his hands slide down and slip under Zim's shirt so it could run over the teen's stomach, returning the touch in his own way.

Zim chuckled quietly, pressing closer to Dib. "You're so easy to subdue." He gave a long, relaxed exhale. "Simple pleasures for simple beasts. Or… something like that. Either way, Zim wins." He dropped his hand down so he could lean up to run his tongue along the line up of piercings on Dib's ear instead.

"You always win." The words were followed by a low sound, before Dib finally gave in completely and let his head drop to Zim's shoulder. Since the other's mouth was much too busy, Dib took it in himself to start teasing at skin. The small part of a neck that Zim's shirt didn't hide was lightly bit at before being sucked on. The whole time, his hand had begun to trace lazy patterns that meant nothing on the exposed skin, having moved Zim's shirt up during what was happening.

Zim squirmed, and let out a pleased, husky sound much too loudly for the surrounding people in the lineup to be comfortable with. He slipped his arms around Dib's neck as he arched closer to the other, baring more skin from under the shirt. "I doo." he affirmed in a low, amused voice against Dib's ear. He took one of the ear piercings in his mouth, sucking on it as he toyed with it with a slender tongue.

The sudden wet feeling against his ear caused Dib to falter for a moment, and stop what he was doing. He couldn't help the moan that slowly made its way out of his mouth and was muffled against Zim's neck. After the sound escaped him, Dib continued what he was doing, biting harder at the skin near his teeth before letting his tongue move out so the small ball of metal could press against the skin.

Zim's moan hummed loudly against the other's ear, and he melted completely against Dib. If the other hadn't hold of the green boy, he would have fallen flat on his green face. People were starting to edge away from them, and ahead there was a huge gape where the line had receded, but no one dare step in front of the two.  
Zim pulled his mouth from the other's ear with a smack of lips. He was dully aware that they were somewhere for a reason, but his mind couldn't grasp why just yet. So instead he thudded his head against Dib's clavicle with a lazy laugh baring more neck for the other.

Dib was a bit disappointed at first when every good sensation he could feel left his ear, but the small laugh he heard from Zim only caused the disappointment to leave just as quickly. It was hard for him not to grin against the other's neck, even as he continued to try and lick at every spot he could. His one hand that had stayed near Zim's waist the entire time slowly slid down the boy's hip and further until it stopped at a leg. There he ran his nails over the thin cloth, edging his hand closer and closer up Zim's skirt.

"Sir. Ma'am. You're up next." The ride operator announced in a tired monotone voice to Dib and Zim.

"Awww." Zim whined disappointed as he peeked over from Dib's chest with the other's hand part way up his skirt.

Dib jerked his head up and blinked lazy eyes at the operator. He stared at the man for a few moments until he actually remembered where they were. "Oh..." He looked down at his hands and much like in the hall, he slowly pulled them away letting Zim's shirt and his skirt fall back down on their own. He pressed one small final kiss to the side of Zim's head before he took the boy's hand and led him over to the ride. Right before he even took a step on the platform that would lead him inside, Dib shrugged his shoulders letting his bag slip off each one. The action caused him to let go of Zim's hand as he tossed his bag to the side. "I hope no one steals that." He narrowed his eyes a bit before he turned them on Zim. "Are you gonna take your bag off? It might get a bit annoying if you keep it on."

"Noo." Zim dragged the word out lethargically. He looked around shifty eyed. "It has stuff I need. Stuff that makes Zim… Zim." He spoke rather carefully. "And if I take it off, I won't be Zim. And I would only have ten minutes to live." Zim clapped his hands together. "And I like living. It's a fun hobby of mine. We should do it together sometime. But for now, I am going this way." Zim stepped up to the plat form to be seated.

The ride operator stared at Zim and then looked back to Dib. "... Oh yea." he went on in a sarcastic but still level tone. "She's a keeper."

Dib had blinked his eyes a few times at Zim's words. They certainly left him confused, but in the end he decided to blame it on all the coffee the other had drank. When the operator spoke it startled Dib, and the words caused him to narrow his eyes on the man for just a second before he turned them back to the platform. He gave a small shrug and started walking up, speaking up just a bit as he did. "Yeah, she is." With that he walked the rest of the way onto the ride, walking up to Zim and pulling the boy to a seat for the both of them.

Zim sat oh so happily in his seat next to Dib as they were buckled in. He was far too calm to be healthy, and the smile on his face would be unsettling to anyone. He looked at Dib. "Comfy? Cozy? Does the Dib have any last requests before he is sent into the air spinning at joyous speeds that would cause bugs to explode on impact?" He slipped his hand in Dib's. "Remember! Keep your mouth closed. I've seen people die from swallowing a bugly." he stated much too cheerfully.

Dib didn't seem half as calm as Zim. The good mood that their earlier actions had put him in completely vanished as a worried look crossed his face. His eyes darted all around the ride, then down to their hands, before they finally landed on Zim. "Yeah, just one." He moved his free hand up to place it on Zim's mouth. "Stop talking. You're really not helping me." He let his hand drop back down and closed his eyes. "You can just tell me when it's over."

Zim glanced around as other people took their seats and were fastening in. He grinned wickedly at Dib. "It's over."

Dib frowned at that and his piercing could just barely be heard clicking against his teeth. "I'm not that stupid." He squeezed Zim's hand trying to get back at the other some way, but also out of nervousness.

Zim had to laugh to himself. Everyone was well buckled in and the ride operators stepped from checking everyone's fastens. He heard the gears groan as they were lifted into the air, and some other riders gave a 'woop.' Zim glanced at Dib with another wicked grin. "It's over."

Dib finally opened his eyes, but only so he could narrow them down on Zim. "I told you I'm not that stu...pid..." His words had trailed off as the ride gave a sudden jerk. Slowly they turned back around so he could see what exactly had caused such a thing only to see nothing but the sky ahead. "Oh man..." The words were let out in a small whine right before the ride finally dropped downhill, causing many of the people in the cars to scream at the top of their lungs. Dib was the loudest of them all.

They were thrown up, down, spun, and jerked about at unhealthy speeds only to plummet back down and then instantly up. All the while Zim cackled enjoying himself immensely while Dib shrieked continuously beside him.

Much to his disappointment the ride slowed, and finally settled their cart down to a stop. Zim leaned back in his seat waiting to be let out, taking the time to catch his breath from laughing so hard. He exhaled before turning to face Dib with an insanely happy grin. "That was awesome possum! Let's go again! Can we go again! I wanna go again! Dibness! Dib-stab! Again! Again!"

All Dib could do was give out a small groan in response as his free hand let go of the safety rail in front of them. It was surprising that his hand hadn't left an imprint in the metal, for how hard he had a hold of it. His body slumped forward over the rail, and he gave another low groan before he actually spoke. "I think I'm going to be sick." His other hand twitched against Zim's, but never once let go. "Why in the world would you want to go again? That was just...ugh...I think I just re-tasted that spaghetti I had earlier."

Zim tapped the side of his lips. "I do so love spaghetti." he commented idly. But all the same Zim pulled the languid Dib from his seat, and onto the platform to stand. "Come Dibness. Come on. I want to go on more, faster, more twisty rides!" He tugged on Dib's hand with both hands away from the ride.

"Alright, I'm coming." Dib followed reluctantly behind Zim and made sure to grab his bag on the way. "It was such a bad idea to bring you here. I could have picked the movies, maybe even taken you to the mall or something just as scary, but no, I picked this." He stopped just as Zim did and let his eyes travel over the other rides. None of them were any better. Most of the rides looked like they spun way too much for Dib's tastes. Why would he want to stand in something just to go incredibly fast? The parachute ride didn't look any better. "Zim, why do you have to like this stuff?"

The green boy was busy looking from ride to ride with much interest; of course it was the most fast, most spiny, most death-defying ones he seemed keen on. "Hm?" He finally looked back to Dib at the question. "Uh." He tapped his lips and said the first answer that came to his mind to satisfy Dib before turning back to look at the rides. "Because I'm an alien bent on world domination."

Dib blinked his eyes a few times at that. It took him awhile to finally snap out of it and roll his eyes. Soon a small grin to come to his lips, though, as he looked back at Zim. "Okay, then if you're the alien, can I be the poor unfortunate soul that's in a twisted relationship with the counselor? Something like that. It was on a movie I saw once I think." He couldn't help but let out a small, amused sound as he pulled Zim by the arm not waiting for any real answer. "Come on, nut case." As those words were spoken, he led the other over to a ride that seemed to be spinning at the same time it was going up and down at a high speed.

Zim squeaked as he was pulled along. "Only if you buy snacks for Zim." He blinked some, and smirked. "Does that mean Zim gets you on weekends? Wait. Zim doesn't like to share." He let go of Dib's hand to tackle into the boy, latching arms around the other's middle tightly with a cackle. "Mine!" Though he let go just as quickly, completely distracted. "Uw! Pretty!" He ran off to the lineup of the ride Dib had been dragging him to.

Dib stood where he was for a few moments trying to figure out what exactly to do. Zim left him much too confused sometimes, and he had only been around the boy for a few days. Finally, he just gave in and followed after the other, figuring that was the best option. Once he made it to the line he had to fight his way to get where Zim was. Some more people had made their way to the line since Zim had walked up and weren't too happy to have Dib make excuses for getting near the front. As soon as he was free of them all and reached the teen, he quickly wrapped his arms around the other and buried his face in Zim's hair. "Mine." The same word was spoken against the black strands while he tried to cuddle closer to the smaller body.

Zim couldn't help but wiggle and squirm in Dib's arms, the caffeine running through his body just wouldn't have him holding still. He gave a dramatic gasp. "You own Zim? But I thought I owned Zim." A hand went to his mouth in mock shock. "How dare he lie! I am so upset. I will cry tears of blood, and sin, and darkness, and eels. Especially eels." He ran his claws up Dib's arms.

"Sounds painful." Dib gave a low sound when he felt the other's hands, the feeling relaxing him considering what happened earlier. In return he placed a small kiss on top of Zim's head before he went back to watching the ride they were at as it spun around. "I don't think I'm going to like this. It looks even more unbearable than the last one." One of his hands idly stroked up and down Zim's front against the shirt the boy wore as he continued. "I don't have the stomach for this kind of stuff."

"I liked it. I liked it a lot." Zim swayed, taking the other in the pendulum action. "In fact, we should go buy and eat some snacks and then ride it AGAIN!" He tried to turn his head to look at Dib, but it was hard, considering the other's head was rested atop his own. "You think so too, yes?"

"I don't know." Dib lifted his head to look down at Zim, and after only a few seconds he finally gave in. "I guess we could. A break from the rides doesn't sound like a bad idea, anyway. Although, I don't really like the idea of going back on them after I eat, either, but whatever." He moved his eyes back to the ride which was finally coming to a stop. He let go of Zim, since they would soon be next to go on as soon as it was empty. "As long as you're enjoying yourself I can't really argue with anything." He turned his attention back on Zim for a small second.

"I agree." Zim pulled from Dib's arms but not before snatching the other's hand to yank him to the ride as the lineup started heading to it. "I like it when Zim has fun." He pulled Dib up the steps onto the ride's platform to snag an empty seat with Dib.

Dib gave a harsh swallow as they were both strapped in and everything was secured. It seemed the restraints for such a ride were made extra secure, and that didn't help Dib's frame of mind at all.

It didn't take long for the operator to finally finish with everyone and to start the ride up. Just like last time, Dib clung like a vice to Zim's hand as the ride started to move up and spin slowly. A few of the people were already giggling or just making noises in general, but as the ride sped up Dib started to cling even tighter as he tried not to scream.

Zim only laughed loud and shrilly, much like last time. He kicked his legs and raised his free hand to the wind as they spun around faster and faster, raising and sinking with the action; which most likely didn't help Dib at all.

"I'm gonna be sick!" It was the first thing to come from Dib's mouth when he finally opened it. The words actually caused a few people to stop laughing and try to edge away, but sadly their restraints wouldn't allow them to. The two people across from Dib seemed to look for some form of escape route, but were having no such luck.  
The ride didn't last much longer much to the satisfaction of everyone and as soon as it came to a stop the operator helped everyone out of the restraints so they could hurry off the platform away from the scary teen. Dib only let out a muffled sound, much worse than last time.

Zim tugged Dib from the ride, practically peeled the other from his seat to stand, trying to keep the boy from falling on his big pierced head. "... Snacks wouldn't help right now. Would it." He tried not to laugh meanly, but it was hard.

Dib could barely manage a glare at the other. All of the energy was sucked out of him, and he felt like any sudden movement would make him explode - and not in a pleasant way. "Stop talking me into things." He gave another noise after he spoke, suddenly wishing he hadn't. So, instead, he settled for just leaning against Zim. It was the best thing he could do at the moment.

"Come, come, Dib-sick. A sit down will make you feel betters." Zim slipped an arm behind Dib's middle and dragged the other from the offending ride. He found some nearby picnic benches but all of them were full of families stuffing fried foods down their gullets. So Zim picked the less of all the evils and went to the picnic bench with just two old folks eating ice cream. He leaned against the table, letting Dib lean against himself. "Here, sit if you want. I promise it won't spin, or fly away with you on it." Zim rubbed the boy's side to settle him.

Dib didn't argue with that and sat down as soon as they reached the table. He didn't dare move away from Zim though, and kept his body propped up against the other teen. "Hmm, yeah, this is definitely much better." His voice was still a little sick sounding, but not half as bad as before. One of his hands moved up just a bit so he could fiddle with a buckle on Zim's arm to pass the time.

"Did you still want some snacks? I could give you the money I have and you can go get them on your own." He tapped his nail against the metal on the buckle. "I feel sort of bad about this."

"It's not your fault you're unsuitable for high velocity flying at several angles per second." Despite it sounding like an insult, it was spoken in a tone meant to comfort. Zim didn't move, letting Dib keep heavily leaned against himself, as he ran claws through the other's dark hair in comfort and slight fascination. "Although with this fin, you would think a Dib would be aerodynamically inclined." He toyed with the pierced lock of hair in gesture and amusement before he ran his fingers over it, then went back to stroking fingers through the rest of Dib's hair.

Dib gave an amused sound as he closed his eyes. He couldn't help but become completely relaxed with what Zim was doing, his sudden sickness forgotten as best it could be. "You would think I'd get some sort of benefits from the thing." His words slowly trailed off as he let out a content sigh and tried to nuzzle his face against Zim's shirt. "I'm enjoying this date, sickness and spinning rides of death aside."

"As long as you don't puke on my shirt, I will agree. It's been fun." Zim tugged on the pierced lock of hair again. "Does this do anything? Or... is it doing it now?" he idly questioned, continuing to run his fingers though the other's hair again. "I'm guessing the Dib is done with the evil rides? Tsk. And it only took two for you to be beaten. How sad. You'll never build an immunity that way."

Dib raised a hand up so he could grab at Zim's to bring it down and kiss the other teen's knuckles for a quick second. "No, it doesn't do anything." He let go to allow Zim go back to his petting before he continued speaking. "I don't know. I might be able to go on a few more. I'm not going to ruin your fun just yet, don't worry." He moved his hand a bit and began to toy with Zim's skirt, just so he could keep his hand busy. "Why do you like them so much? I don't see the big thrill."

"Zim likes it fast." the green boy couldn't help the grin that matched the suggestive comment; though Dib didn't see it, it was easy to feel grinning down at him. "The, uh, freedom I think. Letting loose. No boundaries. And it brings back good old memories. But, I can't really talk about those." Zim chuckled teasingly at that. His hand slunk down to run over the fuzzy, cropped hair near the base of Dib's head. "Hee. Fuzzies."

Dib blushed a bit at Zim's answer, and was grateful his face was buried. For a few moments he kept silent, content enough with what he got out of the other and with what Zim was doing. After awhile though, something about what Zim had said before still seemed to bug him. "Hey, Zim..." The other teen's name was spoken in a groggy voice. "you said something earlier about needing your bag to live or something. What's so important in there?" He finally raised his head after the question to look up at the other with a curious gaze.

Zim met Dib's gaze for but a second before it went skyward. "Oh, you know, the essentials for a happy, healthy life: moneys, keys, tissues, makeup, paper, pencils… um… A… calculator? Maybe some gum. You know - the essentials." He looked back down at Dib. "Same as yours."

Dib continued to keep his eyes on Zim's until he finally let his head bury back in the other shirt. "You exaggerate. That was no reason to say you needed it to live. You could have easily taken it off. It wouldn't have been a big deal." He let out a small yawn that caused him to stay silent for a moment before going on. "I took off my bag and I was fine. I'm still surprised no one stole it, but I guess a beat up black bag isn't so appealing to anyone."

Zim shifted his gaze and murmured under his breath "The sad poetry kept them away. Better than any high tech security system." After he whistled innocently.

"I heard that." The words were muffled against Zim's shirt, and after they were said, Dib moved away from the other body so he could lean his back against the bench. "We're actually dating and you still make fun of what I do." He tried his best to narrow his eyes on Zim, but the sudden movement he had done wasn't helping him feel well enough to really get his anger across. "Real nice, Zim."

Zim stared down at Dib a moment, but all the same he smiled that usual grin of his. "If Zim kissed you.. would you throw up in Zim's mouth?" His grin grimaced some.

Dib blinked lazy eyes at the other before he looked up at the sky. He actually seemed to consider the question while his nails tapped at the seat of the bench the entire time. "Hmm..." Finally he dropped his attention back down so he could stare at Zim's face once more, and shook his head as best he could while allowing a small smile to cross his face. "No, you don't have to worry. You're in the clear."

Zim seemed pleased with that answer. "Okay." But with that knowledge he took it to sit on the picnic bench's table beside Dib, kicking his legs idly. He looked again at each of the dangerous rides with interest once again, making his question counter productive (and if not rather mean).

Dib frowned when no kiss came and watched as Zim sat back down. He continued to wait hoping that at some point something would happen, but still nothing. "You're cruel." The words came out with a small pout. He moved around on the bench so he was sitting on his knees in front of Zim and rested his arms on the other's legs, and laid his head down as well. "Why ask me such a question, and then not give me one?"

Zim unconsciously started running his claws through Dib's hair again, glancing down at the head rested on his lap. "Poor little Dib. Your life is so hard, so mean." He fiddled with one of the piercings on Dib's ear before going back to petting the boy's head. "If want one, you can just ask." Zim chuckled. "Zim will oblige. He can't resist when asked so nicely."

Dib closed his eyes, enjoying the moment of just having Zim running his hands through his hair. If it wasn't for the fact he actually had to speak up, Dib could have fallen asleep where he sat. "Can I please have a kiss?" He barely opened his eyes so he could look up at the other with a drowsy sort of expression. "Hmm?" He tried his best to run his fingers along the sides of Zim's legs, but even his motions were lazy.

Zim's brows rose and his gaze sifted shut as he met Dib's; the lethargy was rather contagious. "Yes. Yes you may. Please grab a ticket, have a seat and wait for your number to be called." Claws ran down from Dib's hair to the boy's neck, grazing the pointed ends along to the back of neck then back up again.

The smallest of noises left Dib, and once again his eyes closed as he was no longer able to keep them open. "Shouldn't I get some sort of privileges, since I'm your boyfriend?" He gave up on keeping his head up, and instead let it fall to the side, nuzzling his face against Zim's leg. "I shouldn't need a number, right?"

"Ahhh, the special back door membership." Zim nodded acknowledging. "Of course. Right this way." He gestured up to his face before he leaned down and kissed Dib's pierced ear. "Will that be for here or to go? Paper or plastic?""

Dib gave a tiny moan before he opened his eyes and turned his head. "I think I would like it here." With that he pressed his lips against Zim's own for just a quick second. "I think I can do without the paper and plastic." He gave a tired grin before he planted his lips right back on Zim's - just a bit harder.

Zim made a soft sound that was muffled before he pulled back. "Snacks?" He pressed another quick kiss to the other's lips. "Rides?" And another still. "Coffee?" He pressed a longer kiss then. "All three?" His dark hair hung down, and he found slight amusement brushing it against Dib's face.

The strands of hair tickled Dib's face and caused him to scrunch up his nose. "Yeah, I guess so. That's if I have enough money for both snacks and coffee." He finally moved off of the bench to stand back up. He stumbled a bit when he was on his feet, but once he was steady he moved his hand to his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. After he sifted through the mess that it was for a bit he pulled out all he had left and stuffed it back in his pocket. "A little over six dollars, that's not bad. It should be enough to just get you something. I can go without." He moved his hand out to help Zim off the bench. "Shall we go get you something to eat, then?"

Zim took the other's hand and hopped off the table. "Let's!" He followed the Dib to a concession stand. He wasn't too disappointed when he saw the alien food being served there. It didn't smell too bad - and it looked edible. What fascinated Zim most was the sugar fluffy cotton making device. He leaned forward and stared as the concession worker twirled the paper cone, adding layer upon layer of sweet, pink, fluffy goodness. Zim pointed animatedly. "I want that." He gave Dib's hand an eager tug. "Can Zim get that?" His eyes went wide when he spotted something else. "_AND_ donuts? _AND_ churros! I like popcorn too!" Zim looked at Dib, still pointing. "Does coffee make the popcorn taste better?"

Dib only shook his head at the last thing Zim asked. "Not really. Popcorn tastes pretty good on it's own." He looked over each snack Zim had asked for and tried to add up everything in his head deciding that in the end it would be fine to buy it all. As long as he bought a small cup of coffee.

As soon as he was next in line he bought the cotton candy first handing the fluffy treat over to Zim so he would be able to grab onto the other snacks when they were ready. It took him a bit to actually handle everything else as well as a cup of coffee, but he managed it while turning back around to face Zim. "Uh...could you take something else, maybe?" He gave a small helpless face.

Zim nodded and took both the bag of churros and donuts leaving Dib with the popcorn and coffee. He made a delighted noise at having all the sugary snacks in his possession. First thing he bit into was the cotton candy. Immediately, his eyes widened and his mouth hung in awe. "Ith dithintigrating inthu... pure blithhh." That said, he began to stuff as much of the pink sugar cotton as his mouth could contain in one go. Making non-too-polite chewing and devouring noises Zim, let out happy squeals here and there. "Ith offithal. I love thith planet." He bounced a bit but it caused him to almost spill his precious donuts, so he stopped and clutched his horde possessively.

Dib gave a relieved sound once his hands weren't so full and tried his best to understand what Zim said. In the end he gave up and shrugged his shoulders. "Well, it seems you like it. That's what I'm getting from your reaction." He shifted the cup to his arm, making sure he had a tight enough grip on it. Once his hand was free, he reached out to take a small bit of cotton candy letting the sugar dissolve in his mouth before he went on. "I take it you've never tried any of this stuff before where you come from?"

Zim stared at Dib with a churro sticking out of his mouth. He slurped it into his mouth, and quickly shook his head as he chewed. Next, he stuffed his mouth with donuts before grabbing a fist full of popcorn and shoving that inside too. He chewed obnoxiously before taking the coffee from Dib and chasing it all down with a large swig. Just as simply he handed the cup back to Dib. Instantly his eyes snapped open and he let loose a burp that rattled almost all of the carnival.

Dib jumped back at such a loud noise, causing him to almost spill what was left of the coffee and popcorn all over himself. For a few moments all he could do was stare at Zim, before his eyes traveled up to glance at all the people that had stopped to stare as well. The sudden attention caused him to quickly bow his head, finding it the best way to hide himself at that moment. "That was so disgusting."

"I think my spooch liked it." Zim smiled cheerfully and continued to chomp down on the food he had as he turned to wander.

Dib raised his head to narrow one eye on the other. "You're what?" Before he even waited for an answer, he quickly shook his head. "You know what, never mind, I don't even think I want to know what you're talking about." He reached his hand out once again to steal a donut. "You should tell me more about yourself. All I know is that you have some weird birthmark, you like to make up weird stories about your life..." He bit into the donut and chewed it until he was able to talk once more. "...and you were already in a relationship." That last part was spoken quietly.

"I AM ZIM! I am AMAZING!" He thoroughly masticated a poor churro, and then the rest of its churro family with much enthusiasm. It wasn't until complete churro genocide occurred in the bag did Zim talk again, licking his lips thoroughly. "There's not much else. What is it you want to know about Zim. Ask, I shall inform... OF HIS GLORY!" Zim crumpled the bag with his mighty fist and tossed it aside. He then took the coffee again from Dib to chug more down. "It's hot because it loves! It loves Zim so!" And then he handed it back to Dib.

Dib took the cup and looked it over before turning his attention back on Zim. For a few moments he looked a little afraid of the other teen, but soon regained some form of composure. "Um, well, just tell me about yourself. Every time I ask you where you're from you dodge the question. The first time you said it wasn't walking distance, and the second time you told me that if I didn't care then why would I want to know." He placed the cup near his arm once more so he could reach his hand over and point to Zim where his nose should have been. "I also want to know about that..." He slid his finger around towards the side of the boy's head. "...and that." His finger had stopped where an ear should have been. "I didn't mention it before outside of Skool because I didn't think you would talk about it, but since you're so willing to now..." He trailed off.

Zim stared at Dib, he narrowed his eyes at the other, the tension building. Finally, he blinked his eyes to stare blankly at Dib. "Huh?" He tilted his head, making the entire moment of tension completely anticlimactic. "Oh. I'm from CANADA. I'm a Canaedazoid!" He smiled widely. "But not anymore! I do so miss the braying of the mooses and platapy. But oh well!" He took it in himself to try and shove the rest of the cotton candy in his mouth; with no real success.

Dib actually seemed to think about what Zim said and after a few moments he shrugged his shoulders. "Makes sense I guess." He had let his hand fall back down only to reach over and grab some popcorn. "I think I'm feeling better, especially since I'm able to stomach this stuff." He chewed on a few pieces of popcorn before going on. "I should be able to go on some more rides with you if you want. Don't get upset if I start to get sick again, though."

Zim seemed to only hear what he wanted to hear out of all that Dib said. He ripped the rest of the cotton candy flesh from its paper cone bones and dumped the rest of the donuts into his mouth and chewed furiously. Whipping back the coffee he chugged the rest of it down with mouth-fulls of popcorn. He handed the rest of the popcorn to Dib after he finished his coffee, and smacked his lips with a satisfied sound as he put his hands on his hips victoriously. He was about to say something when his eyes snapped opened and he let loose another Earth shaking belch.

Dib made another disgusted face at that. "I can't believe you." After that was said, he walked over to a garbage can to throw the trash away, wiping his hands off as best he could afterwards. He made his way back over to the other boy only to wrap his arms around the smaller body from behind, once again resting his head on top of Zim's own. "So, what do you want to do now?"

Zim stared wide eyes at the rides, everything now had a sparkly sheen, and the colours of everything blurred and ran together; alien food, and sugars… what fun. He of course had to point to the most twisted ride of the entire park; it spun and went upside down more times than right side up. The people in their seats shrieked with each loop-da-loop they made at top speed; though to Zim he was seeing happy kittens and rainbows. "THAT! Zim wants to do THAT!" He was close to foaming at the mouth.

Dib looked towards the ride, and let out a pathetic noise as he tried his best to bury his face against Zim's hair. He suddenly wished he hadn't of agreed to continue going on any of the rides, but he had felt bad for earlier. And Zim seemed so excited about it. He gave one more small groan before he finally lifted his head just so he could answer the other. "Fine, we'll go on that one. Even though I know I'm going to regret it."

Zim didn't wait – he was already heading towards the ride, dragging Dib, who still clung onto him, along with. He mumbled and muttered incoherent sounds as he walked to the lineup to stand. It was already a long wait, considering the ride, and it was surprising how many people wanted to be shaken _and_ stirred.

Dib was grateful for such a long wait, even if it meant being in a crowded line. He wasn't looking forward to the ride at all. Instead, he tried to keep his mind off of what he knew was coming by calming Zim's impatience as well as his own nerves. His hands moved over Zim's for a bit before he finally linked both of them with his own and kept them like that. After, he placed a small kiss on the side of the other's head and gave a small sound. "Coffee and sugar don't mix well with you. I have a feeling I'm going to have to chain you down by the end of the day."

Zim blathered on about something, but it wasn't in English; that was completely obvious; which only cemented what Dib said. He swayed their hands the best he could and Zim ended up swaying himself. Impatiently, he squirmed, raspberring to pass the time, but it didn't make things move any faster. "Hurry it up! Zim wants on!" That didn't help anything save for getting many aggravated glares his way, and a good many snarky comments back.

Dib gave a small apologetic glance to the people around, but it did no good. As soon as everyone turned back around, he narrowed his eyes and stuck out his tongue before muttering his own comments under his breath so they couldn't be heard. After he was done he turned his attention back to Zim. "You need to calm down. You should have known there would be a long line. Yelling isn't going to make anything go faster." He looked up front. "Though I wish it would."

Zim marched on the spot, but that didn't seem to cure his nerves at all. In fact, it only made him want to move all the more. He pointed ahead of himself. "Dibness, I order you to make the line go faster." He squirmed and huffed, knowing it was no good, but he just didn't want to sit still or be patient at the moment.

Dib gave an amused sound at such an order. "I can't do that, Zim. I can't just magically make the line go faster." He removed one of his hands from Zim's own and wiggled it in front of the both of them, as if such an action would actually make the line go faster. When nothing happened in only a few seconds he stopped and let his hand drop back down. "See, nothing. You're just going to have to be patient like everyone else."

Zim pouted horribly, not pleased at all. "Well, make it a more entertaining wait." He whimpered as he shifted impatiently. "Entertain Zim." He leaned back to glare his impatience up at Dib before he was writhing in the boy's arms again.

Dib thought about that. It probably wouldn't be a good idea to make out in line again, considering Zim was much more focused on the ride than anything else. "Entertain you, hmm?" He gave a small grin. "Alright." He pulled his arms away from the other just so he could move his bag around to his front, unzipping it and rummaging through it. It took a bit of pulling, but finally he pulled his headset and CD player out, zipping the bag up after and letting it move back behind him. "I'm guessing you can obviously hear some way, so let's try this out." He turned the player on right before he placed the headset over Zim's head as the music started blaring.

Zim gave a start, cringing and he clasped his hands on top of his head; his poor antenna. "TOO LOUD! IT'S TOO LOUD, FACE STAB!" he screamed to be heard over the music, his mind not thinking at all until he'd done it.

Dib quickly brought the headset away and blinked his eyes before they went to where Zim had his hands. "Sorry, I didn't realize. I always have it that loud, but I guess I'm just used to it." He narrowed his eyes. "Did it give you a headache that quickly?" He moved the headset around his neck and clipped the player to his belt. After he did all that, he pushed Zim's hands away so he could replace them with his own and began to rub the spots Zim had placed his hands trying to relieve some tension. "That feel better?"

Zim opened his mouth about to give the other a piece of his mind for almost making him deaf but all that came out was the starting sound of a consonant but it melted into something incoherent. He tried again, but the words failed him, too, so he gave in and slunk over to Dib to thud against his chest. "Mnguhhhh... mah.. blah. Snx.. imm." Dib's fingers unknowingly rubbed the spot where his antenna lay flat, pressed under the wig. Despite the farse hair being comfortable enough on his head, made with a material that let his antenna breathe and hear, it still left them cranky. But this felt nice, some attention to his poor hidden antenna.

Dib was a bit surprised at first by such a response, but soon the way Zim acted caused him to give out an amused sound. "Wow, I didn't know I was so good at this." He shrugged his shoulders, but continued to rub the same spots before going a bit lower and just a little harder. "Tell me if you start not to like any of this or I just end up making anything worse."

Zim let out a sound low in his throat. "Mkaaay. Cappy. Mmm." He leaned more and more on Dib, since his own legs decided they'd turn to Jell-O and not support his own weight. He slipped his claws through the pant loops of the other's pants but his arms seemed to be following the same path his legs were, and it was lucky he was standing at all. Zim let his tongue loll out and he half buried his face against Dib's chest rather comfortably. "Harder. It feels good harder."

Dib jerked a bit at Zim's sudden hold even with how loose it was. The small command caused him to smile a bit before he was following it. His hands pushed down harder as he continued to move them across the other's head, pressing down more and more each time he crossed over a different spot.

"I um.. ohhh there, yeaa. Zim-uww. Mmx. Gets--guuuym. Cronic headaches. So. Doooop...do this more often. All the time." He turned his head up just enough so he could glance up at Dib with an interested heavy lidded gaze. "At skool. Out of skool. _Especially_ with no clothes on." He push himself up by toes but at the same time he pressed up against Dib, his arms slunk around Dib's waist, through never leaving the waist of his pants as he tugged them down just a little lower.

Dib's eyes widened a bit at Zim's actions, but he didn't protest. Only a small blush came to his face and after a few seconds a small grin replaced the surprised expression he had. "Fine, if that's the way you really want it done." He leaned down to press his lips against Zim's own, pressing his tongue out and teasing the other with his piercing for only a quick moment before he pulled his mouth away. The entire time he didn't once stop his movements against Zim's head, his hands pressing along the sides of his head before they moved back up.

Zim whimpered huskily in his throat, not caring who heard the intimate sound. "Give that back. It's private property." He lean in to bite at Dib's lips possessively, slipping his thin tongue into the other's mouth to get at that piercing he'd come to adore. At the same time he slipped one hand under Dib's shirt to claw his fingers up the boy's spine, dragging the shirt up with his hand.

Dib wanted badly to lean back into the touch, but at the same time, he wanted just as badly to keep much too close to Zim. So, he settled for keeping right where he was as he allowed the shorter teen to invade his mouth and move along his piercing. The feeling had him giving out a low muffled groan, and he couldn't stop his own tongue from curling around the other's in the end. His hands stopped their massage just to run through the back strands under his fingers.

Parents walking by dragged their gawking kids past the scene, while others in line ups clapped their hands over their children's eyes. Some people just left the line, not wanting any part of what was going on while others stared (attentively, and taking notes).

Zim's other hand regretfully left Dib's waistline in favor of racking up less kindly than the one before it. Zim couldn't help the breathy muffled chuckle as he bit both their tongues, dragging Dib's to toy with that piercing with his teeth and own tongue.

Dib's whole body tensed up at how hard Zim's hand had moved up his skin. It didn't take him long to relax, though, when he felt those ridged teeth on his tongue as it was pulled, and he easily gave in, allowing Zim to do as he wished. Every small lick and pull of teeth to the small sensitive part of his tongue caused so many muffled sounds to come from his mouth. Soon his eyes were closing and he was dropping his hands down to run them up the back of the other's skirt, causing the fabric to move up with his hands.

"HEY! You two! Stop acting like sucker fish and move!" Someone shouted from behind them. "We're up!"

Though Zim didn't seem to hear an angry word. He dragged his claws up to Dib's neck, wrapping possessive arms to tug the other down so he could possessively take Dib's tongue to suck on the piercing there. People tried pushing him, while others just gave up and walked around.

Dib was much in the same state as Zim. Everything around him was more noise than anything which meant he didn't care about it. All he cared about were the arms that pulled him down, and that tongue that continued to suck at the metal ball in his mouth. He couldn't help but try to nibble a bit at Zim's lower lip as best he could, as a small whine escaped him at all the treatment. His hands had gone about groping under Zim's skirt as he pressed closer to the thin body.

Zim pulled away from Dib's mouth just to catch a breath, having no nose made it far easier to lose; so the human design wasn't so useless after all. He vaguely noted the blurs of flesh colour, white, red, black, blue walk past them. He paused in mid-lick against Dib's tongue as he watched an obnoxiously loud child walk past and up the plat form to the ride. The gate to the ride slammed closed immediately after, accepting no more people to ride. Zim gawked and shoved Dib away, though without something steady to lean on his noodle-like legs collapsed, and forced him to thud down on his knees. He gaped at the horrific sight; they'd missed their turn. He threw out his arms and howled to the sky mournfully "NoooOOoo!"

The sudden shove and loss of body contact caused Dib to almost fall himself. His eyes which had opened halfway moved from Zim towards the ride, and he once again remembered where they were. He stayed silent for a few seconds, but not because he didn't know what to say, mostly because he was trying to make sure he could still use his tongue correctly. "Zim, it's not that big a deal. We can just get back in line. It won't be so bad." His words sounded much too husky to be normal, and he tried to clear his throat after.

Zim reached oh so dramatically towards the entrance to the ride, but already it was starting up and taking the people for their ride. Zim gave a defeated whimper and slumped. It didn't last long because he glanced up at Dib and he gave a horribly giddy laugh. "... I can't get up." He felt languid and completely boneless still.

Dib glanced back down at the other teen, and after a few seconds an amused expression came to his face. Without a word, he leaned down to help the other up, letting Zim lean against him. When he was sure Zim was steady, that's when he finally spoke. "I don't know. I think I had more fun in line than I would have on the ride, anyway."

Zim regarded Dib with a sloppy, skeptical look. "I would hope Zim wouldn't want to make you throw up." It was rather unusually breezy behind him, and he glanced back with a rather surprised look. Clearing his throat and looking skyward, he quickly tugged down his skirt, smoothing it down with poor subtle casualty.

Dib tried not to laugh at what Zim did, but it was hard, and in the end he let a few small noises escape him. "Sorry about that." Of course he didn't sound sorry at all, and his hand was soon traveling down to Zim's skirt once more so it could fiddle with the end of it. "Are you sure you want to go on more rides? We may just end up back to square one again." Although Dib didn't seem to mind that one bit.

"We're next in line. As long as there's no moving, and course" Zim swatted Dib's hands from his skirt "No touchy. Things should go according to plan." He leaned his head against Dib, resting his arms back around Dib's middle, and slipping his hands in Dib's back pockets. "Keep your hands to your sides or in the air where they can be seen, Dibness." he ordered with a lazy smirk.

Dib gave a small pout when his hand was swatted, but quickly moved both of them up at Zim's small command. "Fine. Look, see, they're right here. I won't touch you anymore." He leaned down to kiss between Zim's eyes. "For now at least." He gave a small grin. "After the ride, I'm guessing I have free reign to touch as much of your body that I want, hmm?"

Zim huffed, at both the kiss and the question. "I never said that. Nor did I incline it." Of course that didn't mean his own hands couldn't slip from pockets to drag just barely with a lazy motioned up under Dib's shirt, then back down. "You surprised me, though." Zim tilted his head to peer up through his hair. "The Dib goes from one extreme to the other." He cracked a smirk. "I never figured the Dib for an affectionate one. At least… not touchy feely, was the impression I got." Claws dug themselves a little harder on their way down Dib's back.

"Actually..." Dib gave a small moan at what Zim was doing before he was able to go on. "...you've told me plenty of times that I'm allowed to touch you. Anywhere I want as a matter of fact." He gave another low sound before he leaned his head down once again to rest it on the other's forehead. "All of this is only with you though." Despite his earlier words he raised a hand and barely placed his fingers on Zim's cheek. "I still can't stand other people."

Zim tweaked his lips at first, but eventually he seemed won over. "It's because I'm so amazing, right? Zim rules all, including the Dib's body." He dragged his claws far too low, and possessively groped. "Other people aren't Zim. It's understandable how you couldn't." His eyes widened some as he grinned slantedly. "A world completely populated with Zim. A complete paradise, yes?" He ran his stripped tongue across the jagged ridge of teeth.

The sudden grope caused Dib to jump, startled. He soon didn't seem to mind the touch, and a small grin formed on his own face as well. "I think I could live with that." He moved his lips close, so he could capture that tongue, allowing his teeth to bite at it for only a few seconds before he let go. His one hand moved away from Zim's cheek and back up to the teen's head to once again rub just as he had been before, only a bit softer.

Zim let out a whine that growled into aggravation. "Stop that!" He swatted Dib's hand away from his head, and clapped his hand over Dib's face pushing it from his own. "I don't wanna miss the ride again." He wagged a no-no finger at the boy, not that he could see through Zim's hand. "Hands to self means face too. _Especially_ face."

Dib gave a small pout, and for a while he just allowed Zim's hand to stay where it was. "You seemed to like it so much before. Besides, I was only trying to help your head." He finally pulled his head away as well as the rest of his body and went about putting his CD player away. "I hate waiting. I didn't mind it so much a few minutes ago." Once he was finished with what he was doing he turned his attention back to Zim, still with a pout. "Now I have to think about the ride again."

Zim patted Dib's shoulder in good humor. "I know. It sucks not to be touching Zim. But just think." He pointed to the other with a teasing grin. "I've given you something sad to write about." He then buffed his 'nails' against his shirt. "Yes, Zim is a well of awe and inspiration."

Dib narrowed his eyes at Zim for just a moment before he shook his head and made his way closer to the ride. "I could just always try and go without touching you at all if you want to be that way. I'm sure it wouldn't be so hard." He shrugged his shoulders and glanced back at the other. "I went without doing it for so long. I could handle it again, don't you think? Besides, it is only aggravating you, it seems like." He glanced up. "Of course that means you don't get to play with my peircings anymore, hmm."

Zim opened his mouth and then clacked it closed. He crossed his arms and narrowed one eye Dib's way. "Are _you_ challenging _Zim_?" He straightened and rose his brows. "I assure you, Dib-pierced, that Zim could go FAR longer than YOU could not touching Zim." He held out a hand and wiggled his fingers. "That just means you don't get to hold Zim's hand while on the scary, scary ride." He smirked. "Hm. Too sad for you."

Dib tensed up for a moment and his eyes scanned the twisted mess that they were about to get on. For a few seconds he actually looked a little worried, and was grateful he had his back turned to Zim. "I-It doesn't matter." His voice came out much shakier than he would have liked. "I don't need you to hold my hand." He nodded his head a bit, trying to reassure himself of that fact. "I'm not a kid."

"Fine with me." Zim shrugged oh so nonchalant. "Your hand is sweaty anyway." He wrinkled where his nose should have been.

Dib turned his head around and narrowed his eyes. Just as he was about to open his mouth to say something nasty back to Zim, that's when the ride came to a stop causing a small loud noise of metal on metal that had Dib turning back around and paling a bit. "It's over already?"

Zim let out a squeal as he turned to the ride. People were being unfastened, and hobbling away, shaken. A few ran from the ride and emptied the contents of their stomach.

Zim eagerly pushed past Dib to lean on the gate, bouncing excitedly. "Finally! At last!" He turned and looked at Dib with a smirk and narrowed eyes. "Last chance, Dibness." He reached back and offered his hand to the boy, wiggling fingers. "Otherwise you're flying solo."

Dib gave a small quiet whine as he looked back and forth between Zim's hand and the ride so many times he soon lost count. After a while he gave a defeated sigh and took Zim's hand while trying to avoid his eyes as best he could. "You win, again. I have a feeling if I don't keep a hold of you I'm going to end up like that guy." With his other hand he pointed to a trash can that was near the ride which was occupied by a thin man and his stomach contents.

The ride operator opened the gate and Zim yanked Dib to the ride. He glanced back with a pleased wide grin. "See. I told you I enjoy a challenge." He chuckled low in his throat. "And I always win, of course." He pulled Dib to their seat and crawled in, waiting to be buckled in.

Dib twitched nervously when the operator finally neared them and his grip on Zim's hand tightened more. "Well, you won because you knew a weakness of mine. That's all." He watched every other person in the ride that seemed to be so anxious for the ride to start. "This is so stupid. Why do people love having their stomachs moved to their throats. It feels horrible."

"You're such a wimp-wussy." Zim remarked as he squirmed in his seat waiting impatiently for everyone else to be fixed in. Finally the operator stepped from the ride to the controls, and soon they were lifted into the air. Zim gave a happy shout, flailing one arm to encourage things along. "Faster! Faster! Go go go!" The ride then started to begin spinning, gathering up speed.

"Slower, slower!" Dib could barely be heard over Zim and everyone else, so instead he buried his face in Zim's shoulder as best he could. Every spin and jerk caused him to bury his face further and tighten his grip more on the other's hand. "Make it stop, please, make it stop!" That only seemed to make the ride go ten times as fast and caused a horrible groan to come from Dib. "Ugh..."

"Oh- oh! Here we go!" Zim cheered loudest as they were throw upside down, spinning faster and faster as they dove to the ground then sharply up near inches from it. "Again! Again!" Zim threw his arms to the air with a squee as they went upside down once again.

Dib didn't find half as much joy in the moment as Zim did. "P-Please stop moving around so much." His request fell on deaf ears though and he suddenly wished he had kept his hand to himself. "I want to get off. I want to get off now." He tried to peak out from the other's shoulder and the sudden height caused him to quickly move his eyes back where they were.

Zim didn't seem to notice Dib's dismay - he was far too busy cheering for the ride to move faster. It was somewhere near the fourth time they went upside down that suddenly the alien food caught up with him and the sudden lurching and spinning wasn't so fun anymore. He clapped a hand over his mouth and went cross eyes before squeezing his eyes shut. The ride began to slow but to Zim the world was still spinning-spinning-spinning. He slumped in his chair and groaned behind his hand.

When the ride finally came to a complete stop Dib lifted his head once more and gave a relived noise, grateful that he had once again survived another one. Although, his stomach felt so much worse than it had the couple of other times. "Finally." He turned his eyes to Zim to speak to the other teen, but the sight he saw surprised him a bit. He didn't expect to see Zim slumped over much like he had been before considering the other usually came out of the rides so bouncy. "Zim?"

Zim let out a laughed moan as he rubbed his head, pushing the bangs from his face. "I don't think the ride has stopped yet." The ride operator started to unbuckle his fastens and Zim slapped his hands "Bad touch! Not while I'm flying through the air." The operator gave Zim a hard look before he finished undoing him and went to go do the same for Dib. Zim gave another groan and slumped against Dib.

Dib couldn't help letting out a small laugh at Zim's state. "So, the amazing Zim can be taken down a notch after all, it seems." His own voice was a bit shaky from the aftermath of the ride. "And from a ride. It's very amusing." He let go of Zim's hand just so he could place the teen's arm over his shoulder as he helped him out of the ride. He stumbled a bit on his way out, but otherwise made it safely back to steady ground. "I think we should call it a night. Well, here at least. This place is going to be closing soon anyway."

Zim leaned heavily on Dib. He would have growled something mean back, but every time he opened his mouth it felt like the insides were going to be worn on the out. So he clapped a hand on his mouth and grumbled. He gave a weak nod, and dragged his boots in a poor attempt to walk along with Dib. Zim couldn't even look at the rides without feeling queasy, and the smell of fried, greasy food only made the feeling worse. He must have been out of his mind to shove such filth into his spooch; correction, on COFFEE. "Curse that tasty beverage." he muttered between his fingers.

Dib placed a quick kiss on top of Zim's head as he tried to at least sooth the other teen as best he could. "I'll take you somewhere that you can try to relax, okay?" He continued to speak as he walked them both to the exit. "You can let your stomach settle a bit before I take you home for the night, and we can just hang out for a bit longer." He let his hand drop a bit so he could run it up and down below Zim's bag. "So, it won't be so bad."

Zim cracked an eye open to look at Dib. ".. You're in just as sorry a condition." But he shut his eye again in favor of resting his head against the other; things were bearable that way. "Just..-just wake me up when we get there."


	12. Chapter 12

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta **Kayla Riddle

Chapter 12

The day had gotten much darker compared to earlier. The streets were nearly empty, and the sidewalks were just as bare. In Dib's mind, it was all perfect for the place he planned to take Zim. The walk wasn't as all short. The whole time he had to carry Zim's weight, considering the shorter teen had fallen asleep some time near the carnival, and he still wasn't feeling very well himself either. Thankfully, his destination came into view, and he couldn't have been more grateful.  
The signs that had been on the lab the day before were turned off, and every worker that had been trying to rebuild had all gone home. All that was left were a few security guards near the front. That didn't matter to Dib. None of them could see anywhere near where he planned on going. With a few careful looks and quick steps, he was soon making his way past the ropes, past the tape, and into the destroyed part of the lab. As soon as he was inside the dark shady mess, he went to the farthest wall and set Zim against it until he was sitting down. Carefully, he moved a hand out to shake the teen's shoulder. "Zim, wake up. We're here."

Zim made a small stubborn noise, half fussing at being waken from his sleep venture from the nausea he felt earlier. But the other persisted, and finally Zim pushed his conscious mind to the waking world and groaned some, surprised he'd fallen into such a deep sleep. Usually, if at all, he slept very lightly. It was cold, and everything felt so unfamiliar. Zim's eyes snapped open at that realization, and the sight of the horribly disgusting alien in front of him sent him jerking back. His head clunked against a hard wall and mortar, and the impact had dusty debris raining down on him. Zim grasped the back of his head and doubled forward with a low whimper. "... morning Dib..." he answered back dryly.

Dib gave a weak smile and pulled his hand back. "Sorry. I didn't mean to startle you." He moved forward just so he could sit beside Zim, but kept his eyes on the other teen. "You were in a pretty deep sleep. Are you feeling any better?" He raised his hand once more to rub at the back of Zim's head. "Despite the new bump you may have."

The green boy brushed away the fallen dust and hissed, flinching when Dib's fingers touched the sore spot. "Falling asleep while walking, now I've done everything." But all the same, Zim nodded in answer to Dib's question. His squiddlyspooch didn't feel like it was going to rupture in his belly anymore; for that he was thankful. Slowly, Zim scanned the area around him: charred, broken down, damp, and a few scorched and shattered beakers scattered about. "... I think your house exploded. That or it threw up."

Dib shook his head. "Not exactly. I brought you to the lab." He blinked his eyes and looked around. "Well, the broken down part anyway. You were wondering about it, remember?" He turned his eyes back to Zim and continued to rub the boy's head, though a bit softer having seen him flinch. "It's quiet here, and no one will bother us. It may not look all that great, but you were curious."

"Ahhhhh. Yessss." Zim nodded in acknowledgement before moving to lean against Dib, since the boy seemed to be so obliging. He gave a few sniffs at the air. "Mmm. The stench of chemical burn never truly goes away." He clapped his hands together with a pleasant smile. "It brings back such memories. The good 'ol days. Yeaa." He brought up his thin legs so he could stretch them out along some rubble as he leaned against Dib.

Dib let out a small noise at what Zim said. "It must have been boring. You said you've worked with the stuff, right?" He finally moved his hand down and instead wrapped it around Zim's waist to pull the smaller body even closer. "I still don't see what the big deal is about any of it." He rested his head just barely on top of the Zim's own, avoiding the sore spot. "I can't believe you would have gotten enjoyment out of working with chemicals, or just anything scientific at all."

Zim crossed his legs at the knee and idly tapped a toe. "Nah, the kind of science I did was horribly entertaining. You couldn't get bored. You see - it's what you do with that knowledge and creation that truly makes science worth the time and effort." He made one hand quack like a duck while his other hand made two fingers walk like legs. The duck suddenly pounced the man and ate him with many a fierce duck noise.

Dib gave a thoughtful sound at that as he watched Zim's hands. "I suppose." He moved his other hand out to grab at one of Zim's and linked their fingers before he continued speaking. "So, what exactly did you do? Sure you worked with all of that stuff, but what did you do aside from working with chemicals and science stuff?"

"I made a mutated squiddly. It was great! It obeyed my every command. It even fetched the mail." Zim gestured with his free hand. "Then one day, it exploded into a big gooey mess because I didn't give it a longer expiration date." He chuckled. "Hey." Zim glanced back at Dib. "Do you think you could get Zim a job here? Yer Dib-father working here and all."

"Well..." Dib let the word trail off and averted his eyes to the far wall that was just as beat up as the others. "I'm not too sure. He's not so important. I may be able to mention you want a job, I guess, but that doesn't mean you'll get one." He raised his head and finally looked down at Zim. "It's hard to say."

"I have good credentials I assure you. And experience in a labby environment. I am quite worthy to work in this facility." Of course Zim knew nothing about Earthanoid labs, but he was pretty sure he was far more qualified than anyone on the entire planet to wear a lab coat. "I won a science fair once. Several times, actually. Everyone lefted me to their shoulders and was all 'Yay Zim! You're the best!'." He looked to their linked hands as if fully realizing that the deed was done. "It would… uh, yea, mean a lot to Zim." He wiggled the fingers of that hand.

"That might be enough." Dib let his head fall back on the wall they were leaning against. "I can't speak for you, though. You should probably talk to him yourself, especially if you want some sort of job." He clicked the small metal stud against his teeth a few times as he started to think, only taking a small moment before he spoke again. "I guess that means you really will need my address." He gave a roll of his eyes. "Perfect. I don't think you need anything else to make fun of me over."

Zim narrowed his eyes back at Dib. "Why? What's so amusing about your address?"

Dib met Zim's gaze and gave a weak smile. "You'll get to meet my dear, charming sister." The sarcasm was just dripping from his voice when he spoke. Afterwards, he looked away once more. "Hopefully whenever you decide to come over she'll be gone. Maybe if I tell her I'm having company, she'll find somewhere else to hang out." He shrugged his shoulders. "The very idea may even scare her a bit."

"Oh. You mean Gaz. Gaz the cheerleader. Gaz the most popular girl in skool. Yes, I've heard of her. I have yet to meet the fabled Gaz." Zim rubbed his chin in an amused sort of way. "To think that such bipolar opposites could come from the same genetic stream. I wonder if the fabric of time shifts and rips when you two are in the same room." Zim cackled as he really thought about it.

"It might." Dib seemed to think about it for a few moments himself as well. After awhile, he just shrugged his shoulders and gave up. "I think she was adopted." He moved his fingers around that were linked with Zim's own. "Or, at least, I wish she were adopted. Then I could actually get away with saying I wasn't related to her." He narrowed his eyes on Zim. "How do you know so much about my sister, anyway?"

Zim counted off, pointing each finger animatedly. "Zita. Alex. Jessica." He beamed a wide grin. "Very useful and knowledgeable girls." He wiggled his three claws one after the other before letting it flop to his lap.

"Of course you heard it from them. Why didn't I expect that?" Dib looked away and let his head move back against the wall. "Some people need to mind their own business. They probably know way more about Gaz than even I do." He moved his hand away from Zim's middle just for a second so he could wave it lightly. "Not that it matters to me. I try my best to keep out of her life, and she does the same for me. So, whatever." He dropped his hand back down. "It's just a bit creepy how much people know."

Zim tilted his head to the side, half glancing at Dib. "If people minded their own business then-" he shifted around to face Dib, invading his lap and his personal space with a lazy sort of smirk "I wouldn't be here." That said, Zim slipped off the other's lap to his feet, with a hop of step he let his overly curious nature get the best of him and looked around.

Dib kept the blush that had appeared on his face even after Zim got up. For a few moments, he watched Zim walk around the burnt down area before he finally stood up to follow after. "There's not much to look at. It's a bit boring, sorry." He let his eyes move away from Zim and drop to the ground in search of something. It didn't take him long to pick up a burnt piece of wood that wasn't really so big in size, and just looked like nothing but charcoal at the end. Satisfied with it, he walked over to one of the few remaining walls and wiped off a clear spot before he started doodling with his makeshift pencil.

There was a loud glassy crunch from under a boot. "KILLED YOU I DID!" Zim glanced under his boot. "Aw. Stupid glass got my boot dirty." He huffed and scraped the bottom of his foot against the edge of a block of concrete. That done, Zim's interest then sidled over to Dib and what he was doing. So Zim did much the same as his interested, and wandered over to the boy. He peered - nosey, but without the nose. "Making primitive drawings, cave man?"

"As a matter of fact, I am." Dib glanced back at Zim with a small smirk before he turned his attention back to the drawing. It didn't take him hardly any time to finish it and pull his hand back. "There! Much like all of the disgusting love sick girls at Skool, witness what I have created."

Where he had been drawing was a small heart with the two letters D and Z in the middle, and only a small symbol between them. There were a few chains and lightning bolts around the heart as well.

"Oh, wait a minute, forgot something." Dib moved the 'pencil' back to the wall to draw a little more. Just as quickly he pulled back, and under the few words that had been there before, there were now the words '4-ever'. "Oh yeah, I think that about kills it." He couldn't help but laugh a bit.

Zim tilted his head as he looked over the sad symbol of romantic pop culture. Even though he was from another world, he could grasp the sadness of it. He pointed to the Z. "Being mentioned second means I'm on top, right?" He bared a wry grin to Dib. "And by creating this master piece you both proclaim that A. you are female in nature and B. you are love sick."

Dib's laughter died and he moved his eyes to Zim as the blush returned to his face. "W-What?" He quickly looked back to the symbol. "N-No." He shook his head while he ran his fingers over the crude drawing before completely wiping it away. "No, it doesn't mean that." He moved the piece of wood back to the wall and began to just draw small scribbles of nothing. "I was just playing around, that's all."

Zim made an amused noise. "Now the question is- which bothered you more: A. or B." He mused rhetorically before turning from Dib to explore on his own again. It was easy to tell there was nothing salvageable at first glance; nothing useful; everything broken as far as the eye could see in the dark. Zim ended up poking some metal remains.

Dib watched Zim walk away out the corner of his eyes before looking back at the wall. He continued to scribble, a few little doodles in the corner coming out as little dancing bears with knives for hands. He quickly crossed them out and settled for watching Zim once more. "You might want to be careful. Some of this stuff may be pretty sharp."

"Don't be stupid, I would never be so careleh- ow!" Zim jerked his hand back, gaining a small gash across his finger. The metal had ripped his glove baring the green skin of his hand, pink bleeding from the small wound. Trying not to prove shocked he stuffed the finger in his mouth and tried to mosey from where he stood in an oh so casual fashion as if nothing happened.

Dib heard the small yelp and couldn't help but laugh a bit under his breath. In a few steps he followed after the other teen and reached a hand out to stop Zim where he was. "Here, give me your hand." Without waiting for the other to answer, he pulled Zim's finger out of his mouth so he could have a look at it himself. "You haven't really had the best of luck today, have you?"

"It's fine." Zim yanked his hand back, taking a step back. "I'm fine. It's okay." He stuck the finger back in his mouth taking another step away from Dib. "Ith good. Realwee." He waved his other hand dismissively.

Dib let his own hand fall down to his side while he gave Zim a concerned look. "Are you sure?" He glanced at the piece of metal Zim had cut himself on before looking back at the other. "That thing looks pretty sharp and who knows what kind of dirt and what else was on it." He titled his head. "Are you sure you don't want me to look at it?"

That had Zim's eyes wide and he slowly turned his head to look at the metal. "D-dirt?" he murmured past his finger. He yanked his finger from his mouth, and promptly start spitting and raspberring to get whatever unseen horror that could have been transferred from his finger into his mouth,out of it. "Vile!"

"Well yeah, it did come out of a pretty bad fire." Dib watched Zim try to cough up whatever he suddenly thought he had. "It looks like you're surviving okay. So, you're right, you're perfectly fine." He walked closer to Zim just so he could rub the teen's back as he continued coughing. "Other than trying to cough up a lung, I mean."

"Ugh. Disgusting." Zim wiped his mouth on the back of his sleeve. He rubbed his hand but lowered both arms anyway. "Despite being a death trap, this place is rather interesting. More interesting on the inside than the out." He managed a smirk for a different reason altogether; the amusing irony that everything would look exactly as it was seen here. The skool, the library, the cafe, the carnival- it would all look like this; pointy and sharp. "And you say you come here by yourself a lot?"

Dib nodded his head before he actually answered. "Yeah, mostly because it's quiet. Just like I told you before." He let his hand fall back down just so he could place it in his pocket. "There are times when I may get sick of staying in my room when my sister has friends over, or a boyfriend, so I just end up coming here." He kicked at a piece of metal that was near his feet. "My dad doesn't mind it much. One, he doesn't even know I come here, and two, he figures it's good for me to get out of the house."

Zim's hand wandered to Dib's stomach, slipping under the shirt to toy with the piercing there. "You aren't the most complicated individual, after all." Zim mused as he looked up at Dib with a sly tilt of head. "But everyone thinks the anti-social Dib is so mysterious, the way he keeps to himself like he does." He gave a lazy 'heh' as he leaned just a little against Dib's side. "Or do you have more mystery than you let on?"

"Well, you've only gotten to know me inside Skool." Dib moved his hand out of his pocket so he could move his arm around Zim's neck. "And I really doubt making out counts as getting to know me any better." His fingers moved to stroke the side of Zim's neck as he went on. "I keep to myself because I don't want people to know personal things about me. Things are easier that way."

Zim's brows rose, though his curiosity looked a mingle between indignant and disbelief. "Oh?" He let his other hand that wasn't playing with the piercing to slip around Dib's waist, so Zim could lean up against the other, pressing up on the balls of feet to give him height. "And what's so special about you?"

Dib gave a teasing grin as he leaned his head down to rest it against Zim's own. "What reason do I have to tell you anything, hmm?" His other hand moved out and started to toy with the skirt, playing with the end of it. "You have no real important reason. Just simple curiosity, which isn't enough for me to tell you really important stuff about myself."

"I'm officially your boyfriend now." Zim pointed out with a non-too-humble grin. "I'm privy to that info. Especially--" he slipped his hands from Dib to snatch the other's hands away from his skirt, setting them back at Dib's sides "if want anything." Zim let his tongue slip out to lick at the air, curling at his lips before it slipped back into his mouth.

Dib averted his eyes at such an action, but his hands twitched a bit. "Why can't you let me win just once?" He glanced back at Zim, just to see the other still waiting for the answer, and such a look finally made him cave in. "Fine. What exactly do you want to know first? Anything in particular?" He gave a weak smile after he spoke.

Zim bounced a little at getting what he wanted. "Just tell Zim what he doesn't know. Not the piddily stuff, the stuff that no one else knows, squishy with secret-ity juice." He smiled, but it more of cunning than sincerity. "Don't worry. You'll be _rewarded_ for your service." His claws drew up Dib's arms and then back down, minding the wounded finger.

"Stuff that no one else knows, huh?" Dib looked away as he tried to think of something and after awhile he spoke. Although he still avoided Zim's eyes. "You wanted to know what I write about, hmm? It's mostly just things that I have to get out on paper about what happened to me, but a few of the things are about things I remember. Different kinds of memories." He turned his eyes back to Zim. "Family stuff that you wouldn't understand. No one else really knows about it, and I never talk about it. Neither does Gaz." He quickly changed the subject and waved a dismissive hand. "And that no touch thing. Well, that's just because I have to watch my sister hang all over different guys. She has a different boyfriend every week, and it makes me sick. So I sort of swore off touch because of her. It just seems like they were slobbering all over each other. It's disgusting to watch and feeling anyone even poke me made my skin crawl." He gave a small smirk. "You broke me easily of that it seems."

"It's the skirt." Zim let go of Dib's arms so he could slip his own back around the other's waist, leaning slumped against Dib, giving him the free reign of touch he wanted. "None can resist its powers. Not even you, Dibness. I shall rule all with it. It is just that magical." He slunk his claws under the boy's shirt again, skirting fingers along the top of Dib's pant waist. "Anything more? Go on. Oh! What about that poem about sin and eye balls? That one. You got mad each time I asked. Tell!"

"That's because you always made fun of it, or got it wrong just like now." Dib shot Zim a small annoyed look, but it soon melted away. His hands slid up the sides of the other's skirt, inside, and settled there on Zim's legs. "There's nothing about eyeballs in it." His voice became a bit quiet, and he suddenly found a piece of metal near his feet much more interesting than Zim's face. "I've been thinking about things that happened a long time ago. That's all. I just needed to get it out some how. It was just some family thing, like I told you."

"Aw, so it wasn't about some sad Dib longing for some more pretty, more popular person than you?" Zim clicked his tongue with a pout. "I'm so disappointed. Is there any poem about sad Dib longing in that sad black book?" He couldn't help but slink his hips closer to Dib, feeling the hands on his legs. One of these days he was going to remember to forget to wear pants. "Any more unsolved, dark, uncanny Dib mysteries? Like- why pierce skin if you don't like touch? And if you didn't like touch, did you despise your own touch?" He rested his chin on Dib's chest. "Speak, Dib, speak." he urged him to continue.

Dib shook his head at that first question. "No, I'm sorry to disappoint, but I've never longed for anyone. I used to see relationships as pointless. Watching all of the other people at Skool going through their daily drama of break-ups and make-ups. I really didn't want any part of it." His hands moved up and down a few times before he went on. "I guess that's why I'm actually a little scared about having this, because then I'll end up just like all of those poor souls if this ends, and I'll wish I had never had any feelings at all." He gave a small weak laugh that sounded much too forced. "As for what else you asked, well, I don't like other people to touch me. Peircings and my own touches really don't count for that."

"Soooo." Zim dragged the sound out as he looked from one side to the other. "Written anything new and horrible since Zim last read? Eh? Horrid little poems about Zim? Hm?" His lips peeled back for a rigid eager grin. "You said you write estranged poems on your worries. So it makes sense." He was far too amused at the idea of himself inspiring such horridly angsty poems of sadness and strife.

Dib gave the other teen a look before a small sigh escaped him. He looked away to the small opening which led outside the beat up part of the lab and out into the street. "I don't know, I might have." His voice had been a bit teasing as he spoke, and a tiny grin came to his lips. He let his eyes fall back down on Zim. "Even if I did, though, I wouldn't let you read them. All you do is make fun of every little thing I write." The grin disappeared from his face. "I'm a bit sensitive about it all, which is why I've never shown it to anyone. Well, except what I have to do for class." He dropped his eyes between them. "I don't think I want you to look at anything else I have written down."

"I won't make fun." Zim gave a two fingered salute. "Invaders honor." Surprising the mused grin was hard and he failed at it. "Though I can't say I won't laugh, chortle, giggle, guffaw, giggle, chortle, chuckle, snicker, snigger, tee-hee, heh, ha-ha, snigger, or groan." He patted Dib's chest in assurance. "Other than that, I will honor your feel-bad poetry. With, uh, respect. Yes." Zim grasped Dib's shirt and gave the other a quick impatient shake. "Just show Zim already!"

Dib gave Zim a careful look, narrowing his eyes at each word that came out of the other teen's mouth. "Uh-huh." He didn't really seem at all satisfied, but soon he was moving his arms away from Zim so he could move his bag around to take out his notebook. "I can't believe I'm doing this. I must be some kind of glutton for punishment." It took him a few tugs before he was finally able to pull the black book free, and instead of moving his bag back around he let it fall to the dirty ground. "I didn't write that many. Just a couple. Those were hard enough to get down on paper." He flipped to the right page and finally handed the book over while looking away. "Here."

Zim looked the page over. "Awww. There's only two. And here I thought Zim was worth at least fifty sad poems." But all the same he cleared his throat and read aloud " 'Feelings growing. I must contain. Soon it will be over. But nothing will ever be the same.' " He stuck out his tongue but kept his 'constructive' criticism to himself. So he read the next one. " 'So much confusion. I never wanted this. One simple day. Has made me a mess.' " Zim cocked his head. "Huh. Well. It states the obvious. And at least there weren't words like 'sin', 'darkness', 'despair', and 'anguish'. Or 'crying of the soul'." He flipped through the pages. "Anymore stuff on Zim?"

Dib had looked away while Zim had started reading. Hearing his written words spoken out loud caused him to tense a bit, but he kept to himself until Zim asked him a question. It caused him to turn his attention back around. "Hmm? Well, just a few other drawings I tried to do before that one I was able to do earlier today." He took the notebook back for a moment and flipped a few pages back before handing it back over. One of his fingers pointed down at some sketches that were all over the sheet. Each one a different of the green teen. "They aren't that great. I would have done much better with you in front of me. Of course you know that." He pointed to the largest sketch of what looked like Zim leaning against the lockers. "Even though that one isn't that great, I still like it just a bit." He pulled back and looked away again. "I was just trying to get you out of my head in anyway possible."

Zim looked at each drawing. "Hm. With little success, I can tell." He smirked some. "Oh, what a sad Dib, to have Zim so deep under his skin." He quickly flipped through the pages until he found what he was looking for. "THIS. Is the best." He turned and shoved the picture that Dib drew in the cafeteria in the other's face. "So far." he quickly added. He made the picture do a little dance, making it talk "I'm Ziiim. And I'm so awesome. I rule the world with my awesomeness. And Dib is totally hoooooked. Definitely. Totally love sick." He made the book dance more as he hummed some random tune.

Dib pulled his face back since it was much too close to the picture. The last few things Zim said caused him to push the book away to the side and shake his head. "I'm not love sick." He glanced away and let his hand drop back down. "You're just delusional."

"Hmf. Have it your way." Zim walked from Dib to sit back down to where he originally was. Draw up his legs, he sat the book on his lap to flip through the pages, making faces at the truly horrible bits of writing that were suppose to be emotional, and worst of all, poetry.

"Hey!" Dib turned around as well to follow after Zim. "I didn't say you could look through the rest of that." He kneeled down in front of the green boy and gave a small pout. "You said you only wanted to see the stuff about you and you did. So, give it back. You're going to hate everything else anyway."

Zim didn't even glance at Dib, but he grinned wickedly all the same. "M. No." He turned a page, his eyes scanned over the written words, and he made a face as if he'd eaten something incredibly sour.

Dib narrowed his eyes at such a look. "Come on, Zim." He stayed silent for a few moments before a grin came to his face. "Please..." The word was drawn out as he moved forward to invade the other's personal space, despite the notebook. His hands made their way up Zim's hips towards his shirt just to slip inside and lightly tickle the teen's sides. His head bent low and he moved his tongue out to lick up Zim's neck, letting the small metal ball trace against wet skin as he made his way up to the other's mouth.

Zim sharply squirmed at the tickle but then that tongue had him squirming for other reasons. He leaned back and slipped his thin legs around Dib, crossing his heels at the other's back. He let out a squeaking laugh. "Ah. What book?" He clapped the book closed and tossed it aside in favor of draping arms around Dib's neck and attacking that favorable piercing and the mouth it kept in.

Dib let out a small laugh that was muffled against Zim's mouth. It soon faded into nothing as he gave into the other's slim tongue, wrapping his own around it. He pressed his body even closer against Zim's as he felt arms around his neck. His nails moved up and down the other's sides, trying their best not to scratch, but at the same time trying not to be all that careful.

Zim on the other hand wasn't as kind. He dragged his fingers through the other's hair while his other hand raked down the back of Dib's neck. He grasped the collar of Dib's shirt tugging his head all the more closer as he bit the boy's bottom lip a little kinder than he thought he would. Zim pulled back a moment, trying take in what little breath he could to cool the inside of his mouth.

Every small tug and bite caused Dib to make even more muffled noises. When Zim finally pulled away, a few of them were let out since Zim's lips were no longer near his own. His eyes, which had closed some time during their kiss, opened back up just as Zim started to take in a few breaths of air, much like he had done at the cafe, Dib moved forward and blew in the other's mouth for just a quick second. Right after, he let his tongue trail down the other's skin, and down his neck once again.

Zim let out a giddy chuckle, toying with the collar of Dib's shirt. "For never dating, you're very… y'know." He paused a moment to tilt his head to bare more neck for the other. Grinning, he gave a small moaned laugh. "It's kind of funny. You must do a lot of-" Zim cleared his throat " 'home studying'." He tugged Dib even closer with his legs.

Dib easily moved closer as he was pulled, not putting up a fight at all. The new position caused him to almost be in Zim's lap, but he didn't really seem to mind as long as Zim didn't. He pulled his tongue away for a quick moment so he could speak and glanced up at the other at the same time. "You're a pervert." He gave Zim's neck another teasing lick before he went on. "Having a sister that likes to make out with her boyfriend in the living room causes me to see some things I'd rather not when I'm passing by. It's not hard to learn from what you see. That, and TV." He continued from where he left off, removing one of his hands from Zim's shirt so he could push the annoying clothing off the other's shoulder, giving him more to lick.

Zim sat there for a second. "Wait-a-tick." He blinked a few times. "You learned what you're doing now from watching your sister slobber all over her bring homes. But also because of what you saw you don't like touch." Zim leaned back until he was slumped against the wall and gave a laugh. "That's- that is twisted, Dib-sting." He rubbed the heated spots that the other's saliva left on his neck. He pushed himself with one hand writhing until his back pressed as much to the wall as it could, considering the back-pak.

"Heh. Lucky for you…" Zim lowered his head so his dark hair fell covering most of his face. He let a claw slide down his own chest to the bottom of his shirt and he tugged the bottom of it up to reveal the green skin of his flat stomach underneath. "I don't care." Being a calculated genetically test tube baby, born from a wall of many others that were exactly the same, had its advantages.

"Well, I never thought I would ever be touching someone like this." Dib gave a small grin. His eyes had been watching Zim's hands the entire time the other teen spoke, and soon he was moving down. "Besides, just because I don't like touch doesn't mean I can't store away some information. Is that a crime? It's just a natural reaction to learn things." With that, his body finally stopped moving, and only his head leaned down so he could lick at the newly exposed skin.

Zim tried his best not to squirm as he let out a soft groaned exhale. "So you store the little nougats of information that you see from watching your sister." He laughed breathily, the warm heat from each lick causing him to arch against the wall. "Does that mean you'll be taking notes now since you i _are_ /i touching someone... _especially_ right now?" He ran a few fingers through Dib's hair before flicking the piercing on the pointed lock of hair playfully.

Dib continued to run his tongue slowly up Zim's stomach before he just barely pulled away to speak. "I don't know. I seem to be doing pretty good on my own." He placed his tongue back on the green skin, making sure his piercing made contact, and ran it up bit by bit until the shirt stopped his progress. That didn't make him pull away, and instead he made a new wet trail back down to where he had started. After a while, his curiosity got the best of him and he poked his tongue where a belly button should have been before he spoke up. "You don't have a belly button. Is that one of those weird Canadian traits too?" He gave the skin another small lick despite the question.

"Y-yea." Zim sucked in a breath. "It is." He tugged his shirt up higher, tugging Dib's head closer encouragingly. He didn't want to be bothered with worrying about his disguise or what stupid extra attributes he didn't have; just the attention that Dib was giving his skin, the heat that crossed over his flesh. "It's traditional. Or… something like that. I don't care." He huffed an impatient whimper.

Dib couldn't help the small laugh that came from him, but quickly obeyed as he was tugged closer. He moved his tongue up across already wet skin, and the newly exposed chest. At times he would stop just so he could nip at certain areas with his teeth. Only after he was rough with certain spots would he then start to suck at those areas to make up for the treatment.

Zim loosely wrapped one of his arms around Dib's neck, keeping him near. He gave soft, moaned mews each time Dib's mouth moved to a new spot. It was hard to keep still, so Zim gave up holding his shirt to claw at the boy's shoulders, dragging through his fingers through other's hair to keep from squirming. He leaned his head against the wall to give a loud whimper, ignoring the pain from the bump. The sound echoed slightly in the torn space, which had Zim giving a stupid giggle.

Dib continued to suck at one small bit of skin for a little longer before his tongue left a long wet trail along that one spot he had just abused. He continued down, going past Zim's stomach, and stopped just at the teen's skirt. His tongue licked near the waist line, teasing the skin there, while trying to dip even lower if at all possible.

Zim rubbed his face, setting both of his feet back on the floor beside Dib. What was he doing… with this pink, hairy alien?

He stared from between his fingers at what Dib was doing with that pierced tongue of his. Zim bit his lip, but it did little to keep any of the sounds in; he never could help being vocal.

He was supposed to be taking over this alien's planet, not letting him lick every inch of skin with that... wonderful mouth that left every each part of his skin hot and-- no. Bad thoughts. This wasn't supposed to be real. Well, maybe to Dib, but not to -- Zim clapped his other hand over his mouth as Dib's went lower, but the encouraging husky moans came out anyway. Well _that_ felt real.

Zim lowered his hand just enough to talk, but his voice was completely shot "I thought you didn't like boys." He recalled something Dib said somewhere at sometime; though he wasn't sure who he was trying to distract, Dib or himself.

Dib gave one last long lick to the exposed skin before he finally looked up. "It seems I lied then, doesn't it?" He gave a small grin. "Besides, I don't really like boys per say. I just like you." He gave Zim's waist another teasing lick before he went on. "And I certainly like to lick every inch of you." His grin grew at those words, and he went back to doing just that. One of his hands moved down to slip the skirt and pants down a hip just a bit so he could lick at even more.

Zim melted against the wall with a drawn out noise, his hands fell lower from his face. "Good argument." He exhaled low in his throat. "You're lucky that's my ultimate weakness: licking every inch." He bit the tip of his claw as Dib continued to lick his exposed hip. His legs shifted, pressing his knees against the boy in between.

Dib shifted a bit closer as Zim's legs closed him in. His tongue never let up, even as he moved around, and soon began to trail up from Zim's hip and to his side. One of his hands moved up so nails could lightly scratch at the teen's stomach where wetness still lingered. Fingertips just barely touching at each spot.

After a few more moments, he moved his tongue away from the other's skin just so he could move his head back up and place his lips on Zim's own. He pushed his tongue inside the other's mouth and twirled it around the other's, sucking at the thin appendage. The whole time, his fingers still ran up and down Zim's stomach.

The green boy's moan was muffled into a whine as his mouth was once again consumed by the heat of the other's. He weakly clung to the other's shirt, as he tried to press back against Dib's lips the best he could. Clacking his teeth against the other's tongue piercing, Zim shuddered, pulling from the wall to lean closer to the other, arching towards the hand running against his stomach as well. His skin felt so flush, and his clothes were starting to stick to his skin. It was getting harder to breath with each deep kiss, but Zim really didn't care at the moment.

Dib gave a small muffled sound of his own as he tried to press even closer to Zim. His tongue continued to move as deep as it could inside the other's mouth, flicking Zim's own until finally he broke the kiss for his own needed air. His breath came out in small pants, but that didn't stop him from laying lazy kisses down Zim's jaw and towards his neck. His hand slowed in it's movements on the teen's stomach before it finally just lay as it was on the other's skin.

Zim thudded against the wall, sucking in harder breathes than Dib was. He shut his eyes and went lax as the other petered kisses that made his hot skin still prickle. The cool night air stung the still-damp burning spots on his skin, but for the most it felt good - really good. All of it did, in all the wrong ways. Zim's own hand fell from Dib's shoulder to rest lazily atop Dib's on his stomach. For once, he didn't say anything.

Dib continued the tiny kisses until he had no more skin to kiss. He just barely moved his head away, as well as his body so that he could finally pull away from Zim. He didn't get very far, though, and fell against the wall beside the other teen. The entire time he kept his hand where it was and linked their fingers together. It didn't take long for him to move his other arm around Zim's waist so he could pull the teen to his chest. His face nuzzling the other's neck.

Humans were so clingy. Zim rested his head on Dib's shoulder, his chest still falling and rising heavily to catch his breath. He didn't bother to open his eyes, or tug down his shirt. He didn't speak for a long moment, but when he did his voice was very quiet, and still quite husky. "Could you.. pet the top of Zim's head.. very slowly."

Dib had just been about to close his eyes because of so much silence, so the sudden question, even with as quiet as it was, startled him. "S-Sure..." His one hand let go of Zim's own so he could raise it up and place it on the boy's head. His fingers started to rub in slow circles, much like he had at the carnival, moving in different places every few moments. "Is that okay?"

"Yea." Zim made a small sound, relaxing all the more if it were possible. He gave a long comfortable exhale. "I like that."

Dib gave a small smile at Zim's reaction while he continued to move his hand. Every few moments, he would rub down hard in a few spots, but still keep the slow pace Zim wanted. At the same time, he let his eyes close halfway, finding the act relaxing for himself as well.

Zim leaned closer against Dib. He hadn't felt this good in a very long while. He hadn't felt this wanted since…_them_, back home. It was nice, for the moment. Even if it was all going to be gone in the next few days. But the Dib didn't need to know that, and Zim didn't need to think about it just yet.

It wasn't the best place to be so complete at, to close eyes and give in to the relaxed feeling, but Zim hadn't bothered to care through the entire event, no point in it now. It didn't take long before Zim drifted off.

The sudden lax body against him caused Dib to turn his head just a bit to get a better look at Zim's face. What he saw had his fingers slowing to a complete stop and finally falling down to Zim's shoulder. For a while he stayed just like that keeping his eyes on the other's face. He let his hand move up a bit so fingers could brush over a green cheek. "Love struck, hmm? Maybe." The words were barely whispered. After they were spoken, Dib let his fingers drop.

Dib closed his eyes once more and tightened his grip around Zim's waist. It seemed like he would be making up excuses in the morning, much like he had in the past, and he was just fine with that.


	13. Chapter 13

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta **Kayla Riddle

Chapter 13

"Hey, Steve!" A burly construction man shouted from the entrance of the broken down side of the lab. "It's that hobo from before! He's back again! What should I do? He's got a half naked green chick in here too! She looks Canadian!"

"Grab him and his girlfriend and toss their punk butts outta there! Damnit! We're already behind schedule!"

The construction worker jabbed Dib's forehead with a thick finger several times until he woke. "HEY! WAKE UP! This ain't no five star motel!"

Dib tried his best to ignore the finger that was poking him, but still it continued. Finally getting fed up, he gave in and opened his eyes as best he could considering he was still much too groggy. His attention went straight to the finger that had been poking at him and he moved his own hand up to push it away despite his state of mind. "Get away from me." Once that was done he buried his face back against the warm body he still had a hold of.

That defiantly didn't sit well with the construction worker at all. There was one thing you didn't do with an over three hundred pound construction man and that was brush him off. He grasped the shoulder of Dib's shirt and started to drag him out, Zim and all; which caused the 'Canadian' to let out a loud startled squeak, clinging to Dib. "C'mon you lousy punks. Go get a hair cut and a real job."

Dib's eyes snapped open at the sudden treatment. The hold the man had on his shirt quickly woke him up enough for him to shrug out of the other's grip, although it took a few tries. "Let go." With those words he gave the man a hard glare. He kept one arm around the clingy body next to him as he turned around to pick up his notebook and bag. Once he had both items he finally made his way out of the ruins of the lab and out to the sidewalk.

Zim stumbled beside Dib, neither his brain or his body awake just yet to do that magical trick called 'walking'. He muttered something as he scratched his head, his wig thoroughly mussed from sleep. He next scratched his stomach which was freezing and tender when he did. With a grumble he looked down and saw his shirt still tugged up. He yanked it back down and pulled his skirt back up before looking around to see where he ended up. The action caused a groan, his head throbbing; damn caffeine. "... Where? ...Why? ...and smelling like burnt wood?"

Dib looked down at the other teen and stopped for a moment so Zim could steady himself. He turned around and faced the other and placed his other hand on Zim's hip, hoping that would help a bit. "We fell asleep last night. I never got to take you back to your house. So, that means we're going to have to go to Skool from here." His fingers rubbed at the shorter boy's side for a few seconds before he went on. "That means you'll have to deal with the wood smell since we can't change clothes."

Zim turned his gaze on Dib, a look that would make paint peel. He stared at the other flatly before he continued walking. "I'm going home." He made a grumpy noise as he tried to comb fingers through his hair to untangle it to look decent for at least the walk. He wasn't about to walk about like he'd just done something rather _illegal_ in broken abandoned building.

Such a look had caused Dib to step back and remove his hands before Zim spoke. He watched the other walk away before his brain finally kicked in. "Wait!" He quickly followed after Zim trying to keep in step beside the other boy. "You can't go home. You'll be late for Skool if you do." That actually sounded funny coming from his mouth, but he didn't dwell on it. "What's wrong?" Dib narrowed his eyes a bit. Zim's sudden mood change causing him to become slightly concerned.

Zim gave Dib a dry, rather bland glance at the word 'skool' and looked back forward after. "I smell like the after math of a boy scout campfire, and I look like I just had a romp with an earthquake." He tried to dust the debris from his shirt but it didn't seem to do much good. "I'm in no condition to be going to skool. And skool is in no mood for me.. I mean-- the other way.. around. Yea." He dusted his hands off and noted the cut with a frown. Who knows what alien germs could have infected him by now. He had to clean himself thoroughly, run scans, not to mention make sure that the Dib-alien didn't inject him with any spores. Zim rubbed his face. What was he doing? He was comprimising his mission. He groaned and walked faster. All this because letting an alien life form stick their tongue down his throat was 'fun'. Tallest Miyuki wouldn't be happy with this at all.

Dib didn't even try to keep up with Zim as the teen walked faster. Instead he stayed behind, keeping his eyes on the strange back pack the boy had and that evil grin that was tacked onto it. "It's not so bad." The words came out quiet and slightly dissapointed. "You shouldn't let it get to you." He finally lifted his eyes to the back of Zim's head. "If you want you could just change and we can hurry to try and make it to our second class." He shrugged his shoulders and looked back down. "Maybe if you change you'll feel better."

After Dib spoke, Zim's quick steps seemed to slow down. He gave a tired, aggravated sigh. Against his better judgement he reached a hand back for Dib to take. It was a stupid move, and he was going to regret all of this later when the time would come for things to go as planned. This was only going to make things worse, but.. "You're so pathetic." he murmured quietly, no real energy to the insult, just something that would make himself feel better about giving in. "Tell me Dib, what do you want to be when you grow up?"

Dib's mood lifted a bit when Zim stretched out his hand and he took no time in linking their fingers together. The insult was ignored in favor of answering the question. "Well, I sort of want to be a musician." His voice became low as he grew nervous. "I mostly want to be in a band though. I've tried to sing here and there, but I don't do it much." He gripped Zim's hand a bit harder. "I do play guitar though and I'm getting better at it." He gave a weak laugh. "You're the only one I've told what I wanted to do."

Zim glanced at Dib, slowing until they walked side by side. "Sounds lethal." he commented more to himself on Dib's choice of career. Dib singing and playing an instrument, it was both an amusing and scary image. "So you're a one man band. Any success? And are your lyric writing abilities better than your peotry abilities?" He couldn't resist poking fun and gave a weak teasing grin.

Dib gave a small smile. "None really. It would be better if there were other people I could practice with, but, I don't know." He looked ahead of them. "There's really no one at Skool I ever wanted to get to know well enough. No one that ever seemed interested in some of the stuff I was. So, I just gave up on any help and have been practicing on my own." He looked back at Zim with narrowed eyes. "And for your information I'm great at writing lyrics." He couldn't help his own grin.

A skeptical look was thrown Dib's way; very very _very_ skeptical.

The grin fell from Dib's face and was replaced by a small pout. "You're so mean." Despite the words he leaned against the other just a bit as they walked. "Fine, if you think my writing is so horrible then I would like to see you try and do better." He stuck his tongue out for a quick second before going on. "And you have to be serious. Nothing stupid."

Zim blinked a few times at that one. "Zim?" He snorted as if that was the stupidest thing he'd heard. "Zim doesn't write. Not like that. No poetry, lyrics, fiction, nothing. Why would I want to write such pointless dribble."

Dib frowned at that. "You've never wanted to just let your emotions out?" He let his eyes fall on the sidewalk as he kept speaking. "Sometimes it sucks to keep your emotions bottled up, and talking about them is even worse. Doing those things helps a lot. If I didn't write down what I felt or at least drew what was in my head I wouldn't be able to stand any of it." He looked back at Zim. "It's not pointless."

That had Zim scoffing, practically snickering as if Dib had told a bad joke instead of speaking honestly. "No. I don't write. I don't draw. I don't need to do silly things like that to cope. There are far more productive things to be done than to write how Zim feels." He pointed with revolation. "But I do make my own clothes." He glanced down with a scowl at all the soot and dirt that dirtied his lovely skirt, shirt and pants; even his glorious boots weren't their amazing polished selves. "Aw. Ruined." Zim tugged at his skirt with a sad pout.

"All you have to do is wash them and everything will be clean again." Dib moved his free hand out to tug at the skirt as well. "I told you it wasn't a big deal. Just take care of them when you get home from Skool." His eyes traveled down to Zim's boots. "As for those, well, those you might not want to wash. Just try to polish them as best you can." He glanced back at the other teen with an apologetic sort of look. "I'm sorry about all of this."

"I know how to take care of uniform." Zim couldn't help but snap. Though the appology had him doing a double take. "H-huh?" He blinked a few times to wet his eyes, he'd kept his contacts in too long they were drying his eyes. "Sorry about what? Zim's clothes? It's fine. I can make new ones." He waved a hand and glanced away.

The sudden snap caused Dib to blink his eyes and move away from the other just a bit. For a few seconds he stayed silent until he was able to find his voice again. "O-Okay." After that small word he let his eyes drop back down to the sidewalk, not speaking afterwards.

Zim looked back infront of himself, vaguely aware of where he was headed. It would be a long manual walk to his base; what a pain. "Are you going back to skool or are you coming home with me?" He glanced at the other from under the veil of dark hair.

Dib looked back up not really expecting Zim to speak. "I guess I could go home with you. My record is already pretty tarnished at Skool, so it won't really hurt." A weak smile crossed over his face. "It'll be sort of like I'm walking you home since I never got a chance to. Besides, you seemed so upset that one time that I just up and ditched you and never walked you home."

Zim looked surprised at that, but he nodded all the same. Finally he gave in, bad mood or not, and rested his head on Dib's shoulder. "..You're a good boyfriend." he murmured quietly.

A small sound escaped Dib since he didn't really expect such a response. After he was able to get over it he squeezed Zim's hand and rested his own head on top of the other teen's. "I'm trying my best." He placed a small kiss on Zim's head before he rested his own back down. "I'm glad to know I'm doing something right."

Zim hummed a thoughtful noise. "Hm. Everything else no. But we all can't be Zim." He glanced up with a horridly teasing grin. "Too bad for you." He chuckled tiredly.

"Yes, because Zim is amazing. Zim is wonderful. Zim is all-knowing." Dib glanced down as best he could considering his position. "Zim is all of those things and more." A small smirk came to his face as he moved his free hand over to run it up the other's shirt. "Wait, I think I forgot some. Zim is also hugable." With that, he pulled the smaller body closer by the hand. "Kissable." He leaned his head down so he could place a kiss on Zim's cheek. "And lickable." Those last words caused him to move his tongue across the teen's lips before a small laugh came from his mouth.

Zim squeaked at the tugging and sudden attention lavished upon him. He blinked and looked at Dib as if the boy had suddenly sprouted five heads and tenticales. "And I thought I was the one who banged my head." He snerked and rubbed his mouth with the back of his hand. "Perhaps some estranged clone." Zim poked Dib's forehead before he tugged on either of the boy's cheeks. "Where have you hidden the real Dib?" He laughed as he squshed Dib's face making him have fish lips.

Dib blinked his eyes a few times before he pulled away from Zim's hands. "Hmm. Well, I might have hidden him in some dark place somewhere." His hand ran further up the other's shirt to scratch at skin. "I don't think you mind, though. You didn't seem to last night." He leaned down once again so he could lick at Zim's neck much like he had done before. When he pulled back, he spoke up once more against the green skin. "Think of how boring everything would be."

"True, true. I like this Dib by far. This Dib adores Zim like he should. This Dib worships Zim- with his mouth, like a good Dib should." Zim lifted his free hand to run his claws through the other's hair, like a master to a pet; full of dominance and suprioriety. "Though you should keep the real Dib in a dark, damp place. Some place segregated from society so he can write horrid pros in peace." He glanced at Dib with a narrowed eyed smirk. "He wilts in sun light, ya'know." he added.

Dib glared at the other teen before he spoke up, though his tone wasn't really harsh. "I'll keep that in mind." The hand in his hair caused him to let out a small, content sigh before he leaned down to lick once more at Zim's skin. The action was quick so he could speak up again, his hand never leaving the other's skin under the shirt. "What will you do if he just happens to get out again?" He gave a small grin at the question before he let his tongue move up across Zim's skin. He moved along a cheek, stopping where the teen's ear should have been and sucking at the spot of skin.

Zim squeaked with a squirm as he pulled his hands free and pushed Dib playfully away. He rubbed his cheek, wiping the saliva away, especially the spot at the side of his head, ruffling the already messed wig he wore. "I'd maybe keep him on a leash. Because this Dib needs to learn a little respect for places that tickle." He pointed a finger at Dib and closed one eye, shaking a no-no finger at the boy with a smirk. "Don't make Zim get out the rolled out newspaper and smack your nose."

Dib took his free hands and placed them in his pockets while he stepped away from Zim. He couldn't help the small smirk of his own at the other's words and tried his best to sound convincing as he finally spoke. "I'm so sorry. I'll try my best to keep my hands and my mouth to myself from now on." He moved back over to Zim's side and rested his head on the shorter teen's shoulder, trying his best to look innocent. "I promise." As the words left his mouth, one of his hands had crept down behind the other to reach under a certain skirt.

Dib's hand was immediately slapped away. "You can't fool a fooler, fool." Zim chastised, pulling a glove taunter on one hand. Claws wiggled after, soon pinching the Dib's nose and plucking the boy's head off his shoulder to toss aside as best as a head attached to a body could be tossed.

Dib gave a startled noise at the treatment and narrowed his eyes on Zim once he was standing straight, and settled on his feet again. One of his hands moved up to rub at his nose before it dropped down to rub his abused hand. "That was uncalled for." He couldn't help the small pout on his face after he said the words. "You didn't have to pinch me." He looked down at his hand. "Or slap so hard."

Zim gave Dib a long stare before he scoffed, walking ahead a little faster. "And _I'm_ the one wearing the skirt." He mockingly teased before laughing.

Dib glared at Zim's back and opened his mouth to say something. At the last second he closed it, hearing the loud bit of laughter coming from the other, which only caused him to pout more. He gave a small huff and gave into the teasing for the moment while following after the other.

With a swift motion, Zim spun on the ball of one foot, the other gracefully swinging gracefully back not missing one step as the teen walked backwards. His hands crossed behind his back as he marched backward military fashion, though he leaned forward with sly interest to Dib. "And what if Zim did suddenly decide to wear pants? Hm?"

Dib almost tripped at Zim's sudden change in positions. He hadn't even noticed it until the other was leaning towards him. It took him a few moments to get over it and think of the question, his sour mood quickly leaving because of it. "I don't think you would be nearly as attractive as you are now." He reached a hand out to flick Zim's hair aside just so he could catch a small quick glimpse of both eyes. "The whole relationship would just be ruined." He pulled his hand back and grinned.

Zim huffed, puffing his dark bangs up just a bit. But all the same he grinned wide. "So if Zim wanted to dump you" he drew the word out highly amused, "all I'd have to do is wear pants." It was horribly mean to say, but he found it really funny. He tilted his head to the side, so his hair would fall away so he could look at Dib with both eyes, still grinning wickedly. "Hmmm. And pants are sooo comfy too." He teased, mocking actual consideration for the clothing article.

Dib gave a fake pout as he tried his best not to grin. "Why would you want to go and do such a thing?" He let out a small sigh and shrugged his shoulders. "Oh well. I guess that means I could always get rid of something you enjoy just as equally." He started to tease the other as he clicked his piercing against his teeth a few times, just to let it be known what he meant. "Right, Zim?" He looked the other in the eyes and gave a small smirk.

Zim blinked curiously a few times and copied the gesture, except he clicked his tongue since he had no piercing. He scowled at such a threat but soon blinked just as curiously again. "When you remove it, does it turn into a death ring? That fires death pulses? Oh! Or some kind of death ring that you throw and it severs heads off? Oh! Oh! Or maybe a death ring!- that, that, uh- causes DEATH!" All the same, Zim straightened as he continued to walk backwards. "Even so, well then, Zim will get his own tongue pierced. And it will be a thousand times, plus a sun, more better than your _death ring_." He nodded firmly to that.

Dib had given up halfway through Zim's questions actually trying to answer. The last words the teen spoke caused him to give the other a curious , yet, amused stare as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Better?" He shook his head. "You can't make a tiny piece of jewelry very amazing, Zim." He dropped his arms and let his hands fall in his pockets. "It's just that - a piece of jewelry."

"Oh just you wait, Dib-stab. Just you wait and see." Zim spun back around and thrust his fists into the air and shouted quite enthusiastically "ZIM WILL HAVE THE MOST AMAZING TONGUE PIERCING EVER!" His hands fell to the top of his head. "Ow- too loud." He was still suffering the after affects of too many cups of alien coffee; caffeine hangover.

Dib squinted one eye closed at the random shout. He just _had_ to pick a loud one for a boyfriend. He gave a small sigh at that, but stopped short of letting it out when he noticed Zim holding his head. The teen's earlier mention of random headaches caused him to walk up closer behind the other. Once he was close enough, he lifted his own hands, brushing Zim's aside as he did, and rubbed softly much like he had done before. "Are you okay?" The words came out with a small bit of concern as he asked.

The sounds coming out of Zim's mouth were far from coherent, mainly elongated vowel sounds ended with a few odd consonant ending each. He nearly flopped back on Dib but caught himself before he caused both their casual walking to crash and burn. "Hm. Your hands just aren't safe on any part of Zim's body." He grabbed Dib's wrists and placed the boy's hands on his chest. "There. No harm can be done there." He glanced back at Dib, his brows raising. "And if you do, then Tallest save us all." He looked back forward and scoffed in dry amusement.

Dib was just about to try his luck as soon as his hands were placed on the other's chest. The only thing that stopped him were Zim's last words which caused another small pout to form on his face. "I was just trying to help, that's all." He blinked his eyes a few times and soon confusion replaced dissapointment as he looked at Zim. "Wait, Tallest what?"

"Tallest Miyuki." Zim blurted out consecutively, as if Dib were the dumbest life form in all the known universe. And then Zim did realize that Dib was, and what he truly let slip from his mouth; the leader of his entire planet! How could he do a slip up like that!? The colour drained from Zim's face and he began to panic. Self distruct? No! No wait! The mission wasn't compremised just yet. Dib was stupid, humans were stupid. This could be easily rectified. "Tallest cord, bear, lamp. Tallest mice, mic, mimi, music. Bananana tuna fish bumble bee." Zim blinked a few times, slowly going less rigid. Gingerly he glanced back at Dib, wondering if he bought it.

Dib's curious expression stayed, even as Zim looked back at him, but after a few moments it slowly left. Instead, he looked at the other with a small bit of confusion before he shook his head and mumbled. "Whatever." He let his hands fall from Zim's chest to wrap around the other's waist as they walked, looking back ahead and away from Zim.

Zim blinked. Well that was far too easy, it was almost anti-climactic. He had to laugh quietly to himself just how intelectually declined these mammals were. He raised a thin arm to rustle fingers through the boy's hair, assauging the dumb creature. "I have tourettes." That was his secondary fall back plan; it made a better excuse, for the blabbering. Humans were great like that - a stupid label for everything.

Dib gave a small noise at the hand that moved through his hair, and let his head lean against Zim's own for the moment. When the teen spoke up once more it had him blinking before he shrugged his shoulders, but kept his eyes on the sidewalk. "Well, that makes sense." One of his hands tried it's best to sneak down and up Zim's shirt. "You have a lot of problems." Despite his words, he still kissed the side of the other's head while he lets his fingers tickle down to Zim's stomach.

The green boy glanced down, his stomach clenching and unclenching purposely. "Maybe. But for someone who didn't enjoy touch just this morning, you sure are slobbering all over Zim with every part of your body right now." He leaned back against Dib's front, purposely arching for that wandering hand on his front, giving it a more sensual surface to crawl upon. "In just four days, I have broken you in, Dib-pet." He fiddled with the piercings on the boy's ears, a wry grin on his face.

"Well, not every part." Dib mumbled the words mostly to himself. When he noticed Zim moved back against him he easily let his nails run along the smooth green skin and down lower. His hand pushed the skirt down a bit more so he could run his nails all the way across to each hip leaving faint trails as he pressed down harder. "Is that your new name for me now, hmm?" He gave a small smirk, but it slowly disappeared as he let out a low noise at what Zim's fingers were doing to his piercings.

Zim finally halted, stopping Dib at the same time. He rolled his hips slowly, but dragged Dib's hand away from his skin, same with the boy's other from around him. He pulled away from Dib, glancing back before he let go of Dib's hands. "Down boy." Zim narrowed his eyes pinning Dib with a rather enticing glance, laughing a cackle as he continued walking on, not bothering to fix his skirt that rode low on his hips.

Dib couldn't help the small whine that came from him, and when he realized it, he immediately let out a groan after. He quickly shoved his hands back in his pockets, even if it never did any good. He refused to take them out again, at least not for the moment. As he started walking again he stayed a few steps behind Zim and tried his best to keep his eyes on the sidewalk instead of how low Zim's skirt was.

They eventually got to Zim's home, a few skirt chasing moments later. It perfectly geometrically correct - a tall rectangular building a rather unshocking shade of light pink that seemed to make it stand out all the more between the two houses it was sandwiched between. The windows were perfectly aligned with the edges of the front, the house could be cut in two and each side would most likely be identical in all measurements, to the thousandth decimal point, perhaps higher. Flamingos, lawn gnomes and plastic animal lawn animals stared at Dib with their beady unblinking eyes, seeming to almost turn to continue their watch as Dib approached with Zim to the front door.

"Welcome to Zim's HQ. Home of Zim, the perfectly normal teenager." Zim pet the head of a plastic flamingo as he walked by; there was a dull click, but that could have been anything.

Dib's jaw felt like it was going to drop to the ground as he stared at the home in front of him. The entire time he followed Zim to the front door he couldn't help but continue staring up at the building until it just wasn't possible for his neck to bend that far any longer. At that point, he decided to gaze at each lawn ornament around feeling a bit creeped out after a few moments and quickly turning his gaze back to Zim. "Well...uh..." He tried to find the words while giving the other a weak smile. "...it's very pink." He shrugged his shoulders.

"So are you." Zim eyed the boy before he punched in a code to a number pad that was suddenly there on the door; though the numbers on the buttons weren't exactly numbers, but foreign sort of symbols. Canadian maybe? "But I don't complain." He pushed open the door, letting both of them in. The light automatically switched on, bringing in sight the equally disturbingly geometric - not a flaw in calculated placement. It looked as if someone who had obsessive compulsive disorder of many shades lived here.

There was a couch perfectly parallel with a table and a large television set parallel from that. Twin chairs side by side matched the couch, were up against the wall that had a open door way into a kitchen that was bare but very chrome orientated. The living room was light green, everything else was shades of pinks and purples. There was another door opposite wall of the kitchen, a hallway could be seen with many other doors. The area seemed a lot bigger on the inside than outside.

Dib gave a low whistle as he walked inside the house and looked around. He only stopped when he was in the middle of the living room, his eyes still moving around every few seconds before he turned them back to Zim while pointing towards the door. "High tech and colorful." He gave a small smirk before he headed to the couch, sitting down as soon as he was near it and letting his bag slip from his shoulders, resting his feet on the end. "Comfy too."

A rolled up newspaper bapped Dib on the nose. "Bad Dib. Bad. Don't wear shoes in the house." Zim lower eye lid twitched. The rest of him followed suit as he murmured a 'tweak'. "Or put such filthies on the furniture!" He swatted Dib on the nose a few more times. "So disgusting! I hope you're paper trained." Zim made a unsettled face at that.

Dib gave out a yelp at the treatment and tried his best to back away towards the other end of the couch. "Zim, quit it!" He narrowed his eyes on the other while moving a hand up to rub at his nose. "You could have just told me instead of hitting me." He moved his hand away as he leaned down, taking his eyes away from Zim so he could take off his boots. Once his feet were free he set his shoes aside and kept his feet planted on the floor. His eyes raised back towards Zim, and he stuck his tongue out towards the other in a small bit of retaliation.

The green boy twirled the rolled up newspaper in the air as he gave that some thought. "Mm. No. No I couldn't of." Zim gave a wry smirk. "This way you'll remember." He pointed by the door at a open cubby that hadn't been there before, with the newspaper. "Put them in there. And next time, I'll beat you with your own shoes." He quickly retaliated by sticking his own tongue out at Dib too.

Dib narrowed his eyes a bit more before he turned them to where Zim had pointed. He gave a small shrug and stood up from the couch taking his shoes with him. "Fine, whatever." He walked over to the small cubby and placed his shoes inside, having to shove them in a few good times to make them fit. After that, he turned back around and took another long glance around the room before he spoke up again as he walked forward. "I can't believe you have this place all to yourself."

The cubby snapped shut, swallowing Dib's shoes into the wall; for quarantine sterilization.

"Yes, yes, the government is a magical thing with loop holes you could fly a space ship through." Zim waved Dib's comment off with a limp wristed hand. "Here. Read this useless weapon while Zim goes and freshens up." He handed Dib the newspaper before heading down to the hall with the man doors.

Dib took the paper while rolling his eyes, not even bothering to watch as Zim left. Instead, he walked back to the couch and sat back down, propping his feet up on the table instead of the couch. He threw his bag near the end so he could get comfortable and tried his best to find something interesting to read as he waited for Zim to come back.

In the far end of the hall, completely unseen from the living room, the last door in the hall opened for Zim, revealing an elevator instead of a room. He stepped inside, the door closing soon after. Down he went into the depths of his base, to the labs area. Not only was he going to get changed, he was going to check on the construction of his earthquake-inducing probes that he was suppose to have sent out yesterday. Unfortunately, this planet had a nasty disease called 'procrastination' about it. Zim yanked his wig off, furiously rubbing his itchy antenna as they wiggled freely around. He wasn't going to be going back up anytime soon, not when he had things to maul around on.

Over time, Dib easily started to get bored. He had given up on finding anything to read in the paper and thus it was lying on the table, about to fall off from where he had thrown it. His bag lay open and the contents spilled out. He had spent his time trying to listen to music, but had failed to replace the batteries in his player earlier, so that was ruined. He didn't feel like drawing, and had nothing to write about. At the moment he was hanging upside down on the couch, his piercing just barely scratching at the floor along with his one lock of hair. "Geez, what does Zim do here by himself all the time?"

He glanced around the room and figured he would cure his boredom another way besides letting all the blood rush to his head. He turned right side up and stood up from the couch, making sure Zim wasn't near, before he made his way around the house to poke around. He was just curious - no harm.

Everything was unnaturally smooth. That is, the paint on the walls and furniture was perfectly smooth - not a glob or millimeter even, the wallpaper was seamless, not an edge found, nor a corner falling away. Everything was extraordinarily clean, not a smudge, finger print left or speck of settling dust on any surface. But what was even stranger still, there was no knick knacks to be displayed on tables or shelves (there was no shelves at all to be seen), there were no knives, or appliances on the kitchen counters, no bowl of fruit, nor even the smell of meals cooked lingered on anything there. But what was completely off, was the kitchen drawers seemed locked, all the cupboards too. But there was food in the fridge, mostly junk food, with queer little triangle bug symbols; it was mostly cola and chip bags there.

Dib kept his eyes on one of the soda cans, debating whether or not he should actually take it. He had never seen that brand of soda before, and didn't want to find out if it was some nasty tasting energy drink. With an annoyed sigh, he gave up and closed the fridge door, leaning back against it after he did just so he could look around the kitchen. "This is weird. It's almost like he's some clean freak." He turned his eyes to one of the counters and ran his finger across it, blinking when it came away clean. "Kind of scary." He looked back down at the drawers and tested to see if the things really were locked as they appeared to be. Tugging on them a few times he found it to be true and gave a groan. "Who locks their drawers, seriously?" He tugged on it some more, curious to see why exactly the thing was locked. Each time he pulled harder and in the end the drawer won out causing him to fall back and hit his head on the stove, the drawer handle still in his hand. "Ow..."

Something squeakered over to Dib's feet, padding along until it could tug-tug on the boy's pant leg. When Dib looked down he saw it was a small dog - a small green dog, staring up at him with wide sort of blank eyes. There was a long pause before it gave a rather robotic 'woof'.

The dog's sudden appearance didn't exactly startle Dib as it did confuse him for a few seconds. He kept his eyes on the animal for a bit longer without saying anything before he tossed the handle he was still holding aside, not really caring where it landed, and turned towards the dog. He lifted a hand up to scratch it behind an ear as he spoke up. "You're a strange thing. Zim never told me he had a dog." He gave an amused sound at that. "Although, I guess the topic never really came up."

The dog blinked, looked left than right and went 'arf' in the same robotic voice.

Dib took his hand back and stared at the dog with a curious expression on his face. After a few moments he shrugged his shoulders as he leaned back against the stove. "Well, at least you can keep me company for now. Zim takes too long to get dressed." He stared at the dog once more before he spoke up again. "I wonder if you can do any tricks." He moved a hand out and twirled it around above the dog. "Like, roll over."

"Cannot comply. I'm programed to only follow my Master's orders." The dog stared at Dib longer, acting as if he didn't speak at all. "I mean- 'woof, woof, woof'." Yea, that totally fixed everything.

Dib blinked his eyes a few times and let his hand fall back down. The silence in the kitchen slowly started to become too much until finally Dib let out a scared noise as he tried his best to scramble away from the green dog. He ran across to the other side of the kitchen and tried to make his way on top of one of the counters, slipping a few times because of his socks before he actually settled on top of it. His eyes were wide as he looked down at the dog and he pointed a finger down at it, stating the obvious. "Y-You talked! Dogs can't talk!"

The dog just stood there, exactly the same as he'd been before Dib ran off in fear. The dog just stared at him, with its wide unblinking eyes, not moving. There was another long bought of silence. "Bark." It spoke again in its robotic voice. Yes, just a perfectly normal dog.

Dib let out a small whine at the situation he was in, still not trusting the weird green dog below him. "Where's Zim at?" The words were let out as another whine. He narrowed his eyes on the dog as he waved his hand at it a few times. "Shoo! Go away you freakish little thing."

So of course the green little dog plopped itself down on it's rear, staring up at Dib, it's tail giving a happy wag as its tongue lolled out.

That only caused Dib to whine more. "No, don't sit down." He moved around to try and scoot back further on the counter. In the end he moved back too far and hit his head on one of the cupboards above him, causing him to hiss in pain. "Geez!" He glared at both the dog and the piece of wood while rubbing the back of his head. "Stupid house." He mumbled the words under his breath. "Stupid talking freak dog." He narrowed his eyes back on the animal. "Can't you go bother someone else?"

The dog shook its head and continued to wag its tail happily. It got up and walked a few feet closer before plunking back down, to pant as all dogs do.

The sudden closeness caused Dib to panic a bit. Instead of backing up like he did before, not wanting to hit his head again, he moved a leg out so that he could kick towards the dog. "Go away." He kicked at the air a few times in front of the dog, not really wanting to touch it. "Leave me alone."

The dog reached its black arm out and gave Dib's flail foot's toe a random poke when it was near enough.

The loud shriek Dib gave out at the touch could more than likely be heard through the entire neighborhood. He quickly pulled his foot back and scrambled back as much as he could on the counter once more, ignoring the hit his head took against the cupboard again. If there had been anything around for him to throw at the dog, he would have done so, but for the moment all he did was huddle as best he could.

Down below in the darker depths of the Earth, Dib's screech reached the very inside of Zim's lab. Unfortunately for the Irken, he'd left the intercom on to listen to Dib's amusing hijinx with Gir as well. He fell out of his chair from the shock, clapping hands over his antenna with a twitch-twitch on the floor. "I hate humans."

There was a slight rattle-rattle that caused Zim to blink. Quickly, he scrambled to his legs and threw himself on the piece of large machinery he was working on, before it fell off the table. With a loud exhale, he pushed it further on the table and dusted himself off. Well, it was obvious he couldn't leave the Dib alone unsupervised. Such a pain, that dumb monkey. Zim dusted his hands off to finally go change into a clean disguise to head back upstairs.

Dib had settled his arms around his knees a few moments after he had tried to get comfortable on the counter. His eyes stayed glued to the dog, and although he tried his best to look at least intimidating, it wasn't working. He had a headache from banging his head so many times, and his body was starting to cramp up. "This is not how I wanted to spend my morning." The words were mumbled in a small voice.

"Cowering so pathetically at a little dog, Dib-pet?" Zim tsked from the doorway of the kitchen. He was clean and dressed. His lithe form was adorn in long striped pink shirt that ended like his short skirt at his legs, seemed he didn't bother with the pants this time; obviously, from the green legs that trailed down, higher buckled boots barely made up for this loss. His thick sleek black bangs held back for once with a barrette, so he could stare with wry amusement at Dib with both eyes seen; the same triangle bug symbol that was on the food in the fridge, decorating it. The green boy leaned his slender body against the door way, crossing his elbow length gloved arms over his chest. He was far too amused at the five-foot eight-inch tall teenager curled up scared and helpless at the foot tall or so happy little green dog on the floor. "Is it literature-inspiring?" Zim's cackled meanly.

Dib quickly turned his attention to the doorway, about to yell a few choice words at the other teen for what was said, considering his already sour mood, but what he saw shut him up. He clacked his jaw shut as he stared at what Zim was wearing, his eyes immediately moving to the other's legs before they fell on his eyes, able to see both. He let out a small defeated noise before the pout came back to his face and he pointed a finger to the dog while still keeping his eyes on Zim's own. "Your dog talked."

Zim's brow ridges rose giving the other a rather flat look. "You're crazy. Inhaled too much building, you have." He walked over to the dog and scooped it up, holding it loosely in his arms. "Cuddle fuzzy muffin poopsie butt would never talk to a fly!" He walked over to Dib and thrusted the dog in the boy's face. "SEE!"

"Woof." the dog spoke his bark robotically.

Dib tried to scoot back once again, and gave a pained groan as he succeeded in hitting his head for a fourth time. As one hand rubbed the back of his head, the other continued to point at the dog. "It's weird! It talks and it's green and it sounds just freaky." He let both his hands drop back down so he could wrap them around his knees once more while glaring at the dog.

Zim took the dog back in his arms to pet its head. "There, there. Dib is just a crazy human, think nothing of him, Poo poo wuddly puddle pup." That said Zim dropped the dog as if he'd gone long out of fashion, kicking it away. That's when he noticed something. "... you destroyed my knob."

Dib relaxed a little as soon as the strange dog was out of sight, but tensed right back up at Zim's discovery. "Um...hmm...yeah." He moved off of the counter and settled back down on his feet. "It was an accident, really." He looked anywhere but at Zim. "I was just curious about the place and it was...uh...loose, I guess." He glanced at the other out the corner of his eyes.

Zim bent down and plucked the knob up from the floor to look it over. "Loose?" He echoed, completely unbelieving of such reasoning. He rolled it between his pointed thumb and forfinger before he tossed it to the dog. The dog caught it between its stubby black arms and pittered off with little squeaks in its step. Zim ran his gaze along everything else in the kitchen. "And you left butt prints on my counter! You really aren't house broken." Zim huffed.

Dib kept his eyes on the dog from where he was standing. "It's not my fault you're such a complete clean freak." He turned his full attention on Zim. "I've never seen such a spotless house before. Even the cleanest house has to have at least one speck of dirt I'm sure, but I have seen nothing." He moved closer to the other teen and looked him over. "And you thought I was weird with the touchy feely stuff..." He stopped speaking for a moment as his eyes landed on Zim's barrette. "Hey, I just saw that symbol."

Zim waved Dib away, not in the mood to be insulted for how he lived or how he dressed. It was the best he could come up with in seconds worth; a quick alteration of the Irken uniform. At least he himself liked it. "That's nice. Go clean up the mess you made. I'm not cleaning up with the little surprises you leave around the place." He moved to the fridge, opening it to grab a bag of chips and a can of cola. Shutting the door with his hip Zim made his way to the living room.

Dib watched Zim leave before he mumbled under his breath. "I didn't make that much of a mess." He walked over to the counter and lifted an arm, wiping what smudges were there with his sleeve. Once he was sure it looked good, enough he made his way back to the living room. He walked to the table and picked up the paper setting it on top of the surface so it was no longer about to fall off, then went about shuving everything back in his bag. "Slave driver." He glanced Zim's way after the words were said, smirking a bit.

"You bet." Zim affirmed quite animatedly as he sat down, crossing one leg over the other. He opened the bag and tugged open the cola can. Plucking a few chips with his claws he popped them into his mouth, chewing and chasing it with a long swig of cola. The dog, coming out of no where, pittered up to Zim and handed him the television controller. Zim took it and turned it on, flicking from channel to channel to find something worth watching.

Dib moved back a bit when the dog came near, and was soon glaring at the small green animal. He leaned forward and wrapped his arms possessively around Zim's waist tugging him close to his own chest as he laid his chin on the teen's shoulder. After a few moments he turned his attention away from the dog and down to the chips that Zim was holding. Although the food wasn't all that was on his mind. "Are you still too mad to try and make the rest of classes today?" He moved a hand up just a bit so he could try and steal a chip.

Zim blinked a few times at being held so, and in the end he chided himself for agreeing to the real thing, and not the relationship farce; Dib's services wouldn't be needed soon, and from the way he acted around Gir, Zim doubted the boy would last two seconds knowing the real thing. He quickly smacked Dib's hand. "Bad Dib-pet." He then took a chip for his own to pop into his mouth. Chewing, he continued to channel surf - human broadcasting was so dull.

Dib let out a small noise while shaking his hand. After a few seconds, he dropped it back down. "I just wanted one chip." He mumbled the words mostly to himself as he gave in and nuzzled his face against Zim's neck. His own eyes drifted to the television as he shifted a bit, trying to become more comfortable with the other's bag against his chest, but not really minding it all that much.

Zim continued to eat and drink, settling on some mindless show that was less stupid than the rest to watch. He continued like that for a few minutes, popping a chip into his mouth as he glanced unseen to Dib. Chewing he patted his lap; dark amusement befalling him. "Here my widdle snuddle guts." Instantly, the dog walked over, climbed onto the couch to sit on Zim's lap where the green boy began to pet his green dog. "Good boy."

As soon as the dog was on Zim's lap, Dib let out a squeak and let go of the teen so he could scramble over to the other side of the couch as quickly as he could. When he couldn't back up any further, he tried his best to settle down while narrowing his eyes on the little dog that had taken up Zim's lap with a small bit of jealousy. "Freak."

The dog then narrowed its wide black eyes for once, staring hard at Dib. "Bark." Though its robotic voice didn't change from its monotone pitch. Zim didn't seem to notice the loss of Dib, just leaning back on the couch instead, watching the TV as he pet the dog and sipped his cola.

Dib couldn't help the small bit of panic he felt at the sudden change in the dog's eyes, and he looked towards Zim, about to say something. He stopped himself only when he saw that the other wasn't even paying any attention to him. The fact caused his shoulders to slump, and his eyes to turn back to the dog. He gave it a nervous glance before he let out a small noise and turned his eyes back to the television for the moment, trying to take his mind off of it as best he could.

Then the squeaking sounded, as little padded feet pittered from Zim's lap onto the couch towards Dib. "Ruff." Came that robotic voice.

The sound caused Dib to turn wide eyes away from the TV, and instead in front of himself. When he looked and saw where exactly the dog was, he let out another shriek much like before and tried to kick at air again, afraid to actually touch the dog. "Zim! Get it away from me!"

"Shhhh." Zim put a claw to his lips. "This is the good part."

The dog lifted its stubby arms towards Dib as it neared, its eyes growing more and more narrowed.

Dib looked up at Zim at the words, but dropped his gaze just as quick. He let out another small sound as the dog reached for him, and moved up against the arm of the couch, pushing his bag aside and onto the floor as he did. He didn't stop until he was sitting on the arm of the couch, but even then still tried to get away.

Zim glanced to the sad dog-terrorizes-man commotion going on. It was far more entertaining than anything on the television in front of him was. Popping a chip in his mouth, he watched as Gir neared, making Dib shake and lean back all the more on his perch of the arm of the chair. Zim took a sip of pop, watching another second before setting it down. "Want Zim to save you?" He asked off handedly with smirk.

The words startled Dib, and he almost fell off the arm, which caused him to let out another startled noise. "Y-Yes! Yes, please!" He tried to steady himself while still staying as far away from the dog as he could. "Hurry and get it away."

Zim couldn't help but roll his eyes at the horrid drama. He reached out and took the dog's black tail between his fingers and tugged it away from Dib. Picking it up by its tail he tossed it to the floor. "Go fix the knob." He ordered it and immediately it skittered off to the kitchen. Zim shifted onto his knees so he could crawl over to Dib, his smirking turning to a mused grin when they were face to face. "See, I wear the pants between us."

Dib's attention turned away from the dog as soon as he heard Zim's voice so close to him. His eyes narrowed for a quick second as he slowly relaxed since what he considered a threat was finally gone. "Oh really?" He moved his hands out, letting his arms slide around Zim's neck before they soon drifted lower. They moved down the teen's back, going around the bag, and for a small moment ran across his rear before they finally landed on bare legs. "Are you sure about that?" It was hard for him to hide his own grin.

Zim's brows rose, and his wry grin grew even more dry. "How long you been waiting to do _that_?" He gestured to Dib's hands resting rather intently on his bare thighs. His own hands rested on Dib's, running the other's hands along till they rested on the inner part of Zim's legs. But he didn't let the boy's hand move from there. "But yes, I am far superior in this 'masculinity' you people go on about than you." Zim smirked more so, leaning closer, licking the air between them. "I protected you, not vice versa. You'd make a poor body guard for Zim."

Dib blushed just a bit from the question, but didn't answer it. As soon as his hands were allowed lower, he let his nails move across skin as best he could, considering Zim's grip. His eyes watched the thin tongue move out then back in, barely paying any attention to the words spoken. "Well," He moved his eyes back up to Zim's own. "I did stop Slug from molesting you with his eyes." He gave a small smirk. "As well as other parts of his body I'm sure." He closed a bit more of the gap between them until his forehead was resting against the other's. "Besides, wasn't body guard part of my original job description you wanted out of me?"

"Exactly. Now if you can't even go up against my fluffy little pumpkin pudding face, then what would Zim do if he was attacked by a whole army of zombie dogs?" Zim's gaze sifted half shut. "With rocket launchers where their eyes should be. Would you leave Zim all alone and unprotected to be slaughtered by such deadly armed canine?" He mocked a pout, with little luck.

Dib narrowed his eyes on Zim for a few seconds. After a while he let out a small sigh and averted his eyes despite the position he was in. "No, I wouldn't." He turned his attention back to the other and shrugged. "I'll tell you one thing. I'm not much of a fighter, so it wouldn't take long for those little zombie dogs to go right through me and get to you." He tried to free his hands from Zim's grip and run his nails closer to his thighs. "You better hope such a thing doesn't happen."

Zim pulled Dib's hands from his legs, though he bridged that small gap, speaking against the boy's lips. "_I_ could easily beat you up." His thin tongue drew out to run against Dib's lips, and in that simple distraction he pushed the barely well balanced Dib off the arm of the couch. "See."

Dib gave a yelp as he fell to the floor, not at all expecting the treatment. He had tried to grab at whatever he could, but it was pretty much useless and so he ended up flat on his back with his feet still hanging on the side of the couch. He gave a low groan, since the fall didn't help his already bruised head. "Geez, Zim. That hurt."

Zim leaned an elbow on the arm of the couch, head leaning on a hand as he peered down at Dib. "I never once said I was nice." He grinned rigid teeth down at the boy.

Dib glared up at the other teen for a few seconds before a small grin came over his face. "No, you didn't." His legs moved against Zim's sides, trapping him in. As soon as he did that, he leaned up and grabbed Zim by the front, pulling the teen on top of his own body so they were face to face and he was laying down once again. "Since you want to play rough, I guess I will too." With those words, he leaned up and bit down on Zim's neck, pressing his piercing against what his teeth weren't near.

Zim squeaked loudly, squirming in the hold. He flinched away some from the bite, but in the end he pressed closer down against the boy below, quite unshyly. "I don't think you could play at my level, Dib-thing." He practically purred the words, drawing one naked leg up against Dib's side. "You wouldn't be able to handle it." Zim pulled away enough to so he could lift himself on arms to look down at the other. "When Zim is mean.." he slipped a claw to sign an 'X' on Dib's belt before slinking under the boy's shirt to rake his sharp fingers slowly across the skin, dragging Dib's shirt up at the same time. "Zim is _mean_." He scratched the skin hard across the boy's chest without warning.

Dib flinched at the sudden scratches, and his back arched off the ground a bit, despite having Zim's weight on top of him. Even with the gloves Zim had on, the rough treatment still hurt. He tried his best to ignore the pain as he narrowed one eye on the other before leaning up into the other's hands. He pushed his mouth against Zim's own and forced his tongue past, twisting both together so he could coax the other's out and bite at it.

Zim made a low sound in his throat, biting hard at Dib's lips so he could slither his own abused tongue back into his own mouth. His hand still on Dib's chest suddenly pushed the boy back down on the floor, away from Zim's mouth. The green boy sat up with an amused sort of expression, wiping his mouth with the back of his gloved hand. "Humans, always so eager to mate." He narrowed his eyes.

Dib licked at his lips just to make sure they were still there after the harsh bites before he looked up at Zim. The other's words caused him to blush just a bit while he rolled his eyes. "Do you really have to put it that way? You make it sound like we're all a bunch of animals." He propped himself up on his elbows since lying completely down was making his headache worse. "Besides, you're a human too. You did that before in class while we were passing the note." His expression turned curious. "Your speech patterns confuse me sometimes."

Zim lightly shrugged, letting his other hand join the other on Dib's chest. "Canadian accent." He kept his eyes narrowed. "And you are a bunch of animals. With no other purpose but to spread your hairless monkey genes across the planet's surface." He scoffed. "I should know, I did the research." He sat back on Dib, crossing his arms with skeptical amusement. "There is nothing of worth in the human species. Just short lived egos. I've seen better purposes in fuzzy plant life."

Dib stared at Zim for a few moments longer before he moved his eyes to the TV and the mindless show that was still on the screen. "I guess, you're right. Dealing with all the stupid people at Skool on a day to day basis, I can understand the egos and annoyance of some." He turned his attention back on Zim and gave a small smile. "I don't know if I come across that way, though." He leaned up a bit more so he could raise his arms up without the worry of falling back. He let his hands move to Zim's head and rubbed at the spots he normally did, trying to help the other relax. "Sorry if I have." He looked down between them. "Besides, you have a purpose. I've grown pretty attached to you, so you mean a lot to me, despite what you may think about everyone else."

Zim was silent, staring at Dib with wide eyes before they sifted half way once more; the motion felt too good for anything healthy. "Attached?" he echoed the word. He glanced away murmuring to himself "Wouldn't you like to know Zim's purpose." But he looked back to Dib. "Is that your purpose? To like Zim?" He tilted his head as if that would help him see Dib in a better light, his skepticism was blatantly obvious. "And really, Dib-human, how long do you think a purpose like that will last?"

Dib looked back up at the question, and let out an amused noise. He rubbed at Zim's head for a few more seconds before letting his hands fall behind the teen's neck as he spoke. "We're in a real relationship now, right? It will last as long as this lasts, and I have to admit, I hope it's a while." He shrugged his shoulders as he tried to change the subject as best he could. "Anyway, I never really had a purpose. I just sort of lived my life. There was no real reason for me to find one."

Zim groaned at the answers and placed a hand on Dib's face to push the other away. "Your optimism is just too much." He could only take so much cheesyness. He rolled his eyes. "What's the longest record of relationshipness on this planet?" Of all things, it was genuine curiosity, despite the sarcasm.

Dib dropped his hands back down to the floor and glared at Zim for the one on his face. "I don't know." The words were mumbled since Zim's glove was nearly covering his mouth. He moved a hand up to push it away and speak better. "That's a hard question to answer. A lot of people get into a lot of relationships. No one keeps a record of who does what concerning such a thing. You should know that. Canadian or not." He raised a brow. "Why do you want to know?"

Zim took his hand back, straightening the glove with precise movements of his fingers with the other hand. A slow lined smirk crossed his lips as he glanced at Dib through tightly narrowed eyes. He opened them wider to fully take Dib in a gaze before his smirk became more sinuous. "What if I told you I could see the future." he answered quite slow with cautious purpose.

Dib rolled his eyes at such a thing while giving an amused sound. He lay back flat with his hands resting behind his head before he spoke up once more. "I wouldn't believe you. No one can see the future. It's not possible."

That had Zim only grinning all the more. "Oh, but it is." He slunk forward onto hands and knees over Dib. "Because I can." He crawled closer until he loomed over the boy, pulling his lips to grin his jagged teeth, tightly locked together in a Cheshire grin. "And I know…" he leaned his head lower to Dib's, his eyes sifting almost closed "...the world is going to end." Zim softly finished at the corner of Dib's lips.

Although Zim's sudden closeness was rather enticing, Dib couldn't help the laugh that came from him at such information. He tried his best to get himself under control, but it took a little while. "That's what you call looking into the future?" He gave a small smirk. "If that's the case, then there are many other people that can see into the future other than yourself. You aren't the only one that has said such a thing." He let his eyes roam around for a bit before they landed back on Zim. "I think they have all been successfully proven wrong."

Zim's brows raised as did his head from Dib's. "You may not believe Zim... but you said you'd do everything in your power to stop it. Did you not?" He sat back on his knees, tilting his head with dry curiosity. "Or was it just pretty words to a pretty boy?" He reached a claw up to pluck the burette from his hair, letting his bangs splash back down over half his face. He went back to smirking after.

Dib shook his head a few times before he settled his eyes back on Zim's face. One of his hands moved up away from his head to try and push the hair away from the other's eye, but the strands just fell right back down, as did his hand. "I meant what I said. The idea is a little farfetched though, you have to admit." He placed his hand back behind his head and shrugged.

Zim bowed his head some, his hair for the most shadowing his face. But the corner of his smirk could still be seen. "I didn't think you could either." It was solemnly mused.

Dib blinked his eyes a few times as he looked at the other. After a few moments, his gaze narrowed just a bit and he propped himself up on his elbows once again so he could lean closer to the other. "Zim?" He tried to move his face a bit so he could get a better look at the other teen's.

Zim's boot slammed against Dib's chest, forcing the boy to lay back down. There he kept him pinned, the bottom of his boot surprisingly clean. He slunk closer, bending his leg so he could keep Dib pinned; the green boy was surprisingly flexible, surprisingly strong. "The world is going to end soon, Dib-pet." Zim bared his teeth, spitting the words down at Dib. "You won't know when, you won't know how. But I promise this isn't a lie." He sneered, his voice lowering as he pressed his weight onto the foot on Dib's chest "You don't have to believe me, but I certainly don't believe you."

Dib let out a gasp for breath, not expecting the change in positions, nor the sudden weight on his chest. Both his hands moved down to grab at Zim's boot, but the teen was stronger than he looked, and he wasn't able to lift what he thought would be easy. He gave in, instead settling for glaring up at Zim as he strained to speak. "And why not, hmm? I told you that if anything like that would happen, I would try to stop It, and I i _did_ /i mean it. Whether it's possible or not for the world to actually end, I wouldn't just suddenly let anything happen to you." His eyes narrowed a bit. "I'm supposed to protect you, right? And even if it was pretend before, nothing is pretend now."

Zim's sneer slowly left and he pressed his lips back together. But the energy hadn't left the green boy by far. He finally yanked his boot from Dib's chest and instead straddled his middle once again. "So do it! Stop it from ending! Stop it from happening!" He beat on Dib's chest animatedly, almost panickedly. "Because it is! It's going to happen soon!" He shook his head. He was losing it. This was stupid. What in the Tallest's name was he trying to do!? The game had suddenly gone weird.

Dib quickly yanked at Zim's wrists while trying to take in breaths of air at the same time. He held each hand in his own tightly as he tried to calm the other down. "Zim, listen to me. Even if the world was going to end, how would you expect me to just up and suddenly stop it? I would have to know how it's going to happen, so many details before I could even attempt to stop it." He gave a weak laugh. "I can't just magically stop the end of the world if it were to happen." He let out a small sigh and let go of the other's hands to move his own up and rub at Zim's shoulders. "Where are you getting the crazy idea that it's going to end anyway?"

Zim's shoulders slumped, the disappointment was obvious, and his head hung low. His faith was defeated, the boy had already lost. They were all going to die, or be enslaved; and planet Earth would be known as nothing more than a cheap thrill. But even still, he spoke up again "… would you even try?"

Dib gave a small nod to the question. "Of course I would. I told you I would." He continued to rub Zim's shoulders for a little longer before finally dropping his hands down to hold the other's tightly. "I guess the fact that I don't believe in certain things doesn't really help. Having someone tell me that any day the world could end doesn't strike me as something odd. Random people on the street say it all the time." He shrugged his shoulders before letting out another sigh. "I will try though. If it were to ever happen."

Zim raised his head and gave Dib a rather flat look, quite unimpressed. "… not good enough." And with that he reached over and grabbed the green dog, lifted up Dib's shirt and stuffed it inside; the animal was freezing cold. Zim stood up, stepping away from Dib, dusting his hands off.

The shriek Dib let out couldn't have gotten any louder. He stood up so quickly, he thought he was going to become dizzy, but immediately became occupied with trying to get the dog out from under his shirt. "Zim!" The name came out as more of a squeak than a yell. "Get it out! Please!" He started jumping around hoping that shook the thing out.

Zim didn't even seem to notice, he just sat right back down on the couch where he had been, picking up his cola and taking a handful of chips and stuffing it in his mouth as he watched the TV.

The dog itself clung to Dib's front, which wasn't right for any normal dog. It seemed to crawl up higher on Dib's front, scaling it quite easily despite how much the boy moved around.

Dib let out a small whimper as the dog got closer to him. The fact that the strange thing was so unnatural unnerved him to no end. "Get off of me!" The words came out as a whine and after he moved his hands up to try and push the dog down.

Suddenly the dog's green head burst out from the collar of Dib's shirt, it's eyes bugged and it threw out its chubby black arms shouting "RAWR!"

Dib gave a loud scream as his eyes widened. He tried to move backwards, but ended up tripping over his own feet and the slippery floor as well. With a loud noise, he fell back, only succeeding in hitting his head once more and giving out a loud groan as his eyes closed. His sudden fear of the dog was ignored for the pain in his skull.

Even Zim flinched when he heard Dib fall hard back on the floor. With a sigh, he got up and rescued Dib, grabbing the dog by the head, yanking him from the boy's shirt and tossing him aside. "Saved you again." He plucked Dib's glasses off and set them atop his own head to peer over and examine Dib's. He rolled the boy's head to the side, cautiously feeling under. "Well congratulations. You've made your head all lumpy, Dib-pet. No wonder you're so stupid." Zim couldn't help but snicker.

Dib let out another small noise when Zim touched his head. He ignored the snicker that came from the other and kept his eyes closed, laying there for the moment not really wanting to move. Finally after a few moments he spoke up and it was obvious he was more than a bit upset. "I would have been fine if you hadn't of done that."

Zim sighed through his teeth, moving to kneel beside Dib's head. "C'mon, Zim's lap is a better pillow than the floor." He tried to help the boy move the boy's shoulders and head as carefully as he could onto his lap, laying Dib's cheek against the green skin, minding the sore bump on the back. "Call it a small consolation, for your suffering." He smirked a little.

Dib only opened his eyes for a small second as his head was rested on the other's lap. Just as quickly, he closed them once again and let out a small sigh. The new position was much more comfortable than the floor and didn't ache his already bruised head nearly as bad. "Much better, thanks." He gave a small smile.

Zim quietly ran a few claws through the boy's hair, a little entertained by the real thing, different from his wig. Real hair was flawed, got dirty, greasy, sweaty, hung in clumps or got tangled. Dib was still wearing his clothes from last night. "... You still smell like burnt."

The statement caused Dib to give only a small noise in response, put at ease by the fingers running through his hair. After a few moments he shrugged a shoulder and gave a sigh. "I know I do. I need a shower and a change of clothes, but I was smart and decided to come here instead of doing anything productive." He opened one eye to glance up at Zim with a small smirk. "Like going to Skool."

Zim smiled a little down at Dib in return. He gave a heavy sigh and let his shoulders relax with the action. He continued to run his fingers through the dark hair, trying to fix the mess at least a little, despite it being horribly filthy. "..Maybe the end won't come so soon."

"Hmm?" Dib closed both eyes once more and relaxed again. One of his hands moved up a bit so he could rest it on Zim's leg, moving his fingers up and down on the exposed skin in a small innocent touch. "What makes you say that?"

Zim's mouth quirked rather wryly. "I told you, Zim can predict the future. And sometimes a something can catalyst a whole new something to happen." He made a sound akin to a sigh. "But it only delays the inevitable."

Dib opened his eyes back up after the sigh was heard so he could glance up at Zim. A frown came to his face as he stared at the other for a few moments until he finally spoke. "Well, maybe the new something will make the inevitable just vanish completely." He squeezed Zim's leg for a small second, trying to reassure the teen as best he could. "Hmm?"

Zim gave the other a completely flat look. "No." He tried to look at the TV, but at the angle they sat in, the screen was unseeable. It had him scowling. "It will happen. And this 'real' relationship we've made a verbal contract to… will be completely terminated." His hand stopped, resting atop the boy's head.

Dib scowled a bit at Zim's choice of words. "I told you that nothing is going to happen." He dropped his hand, letting it rest on his stomach. He looked to the side, not wanting to disturb Zim's hand. "And even if it does, I will try to stop whatever decides to happen. I don't care if you believe me or not. This relationship may just seem like some stupid contract to you, but I'm not taking it as such." He closed his eyes again, not wanting to deal with the situation any longer. "You don't have to believe me on that, either, if you don't want to."

Zim made thoughtful sound low in his throat. "You're an odd one." Said the green alien, boy in the short pink dress, minus pants, minus his barrette. "But fine. Prove it. Stop it." He downcast his eyes back on Dib. "Because Zim is never wrong when it comes to predictions like this. If you do, I won't ever doubt you. If you succeed in stopping it... well... I guess Zim is yours." He scratched his cheek thinking. "What do they call it? Oh. We'll 'go steady'." Zim laughed sarcastic amusement.

Dib let out a long sigh as he glanced back at Zim. The other's laugh caused him to narrow his eyes just a bit, but the fact that at least a little of the tension was gone caused his bad mood to fade away. He turned his head a little, and placed a small kiss against Zim's bare leg before he finally spoke up against skin. "It's a deal."

Claws ran through the pointed lock of hair on Dib's head, clinking when they reached the piercing there. Zim toyed with it a moment, tilting his head a little. "... You have three days." He finally looked down at the boy's face, all seriousness on his own. "Starting.. _now_." A claw flicked the hair piercing simultaneously with the last word.

There was a small moment of silence after that one word. Dib lay as he was as he thought over what Zim said. After a bit he sat up, despite the pain in his head, moving his hand to the back of it and rubbing, hoping that would help dull the pain somewhat. With a small bit of movement, he turned to face the other and kept his eyes on the only one of Zim's he could see. "I guess that means I should find out whatever I can about trying to stop it then, hmm?" He rubbed at a rather sore spot which caused him to flinch and quickly drop his hand. "I still have to find out why you think it's going to happen in the first place. Can't you at least tell me that if you say you can see the future?"

Zim's jaw visibly tightened, his throat moving with a swallow, but the expression on his face was rather plain. "My internal clock says it is currently one twenty three pm, Friday. And it will happen on Monday at one twenty three pm." He slowly shook his head. "I can't tell you anything more until tomorrow. The, uh, predictal imagery is kind of fuzzy. But what I can tell you is this: It _will_ happen, Dib-pet." He nodded, glancing away. "And everything you've grown up with, everything all around, will be destroyed. The human race will be reduced to the dirt they walk upon. And you," Zim pointed a nudging finger to Dib's chest "you my Dib, will be the last one, the last free soul to see it all turn to ruin. Your mind won't be able to grasp what is happening, nor cope, and it will slowly fall apart. Then, you too will die." Zim settled back, knitting his fingers together and resting them on his lap. "This is your true future. Unless you stop it from happening."

Dib had dropped his gaze down to the finger which had touched his chest, but didn't even look back up once Zim pulled away. He only listened to each word said, taking it all in bit by bit. Even after Zim stopped speaking Dib kept silent for a long while, words refusing to come from his mouth. His eyes blinked slowly, and that's when he realized he had been silent for much too long, and he had to say something - anything at all. "I don't even know where to start. I'm completely blind trying to stop something I just now have to start believing."

"I'm not asking you to believe. Call me crazy. It's no skin of Zim's nose." Zim scratched the skin where his nose should have been in gesture. "Pursuing it or not, is up to you. Maybe if you look in all the right places, ask all the right questions..." The corner of Zim's lip tweaked and he leaned forward to Dib, resting his weight on a hand on the floor. "You'll see it all under yours." He flicked a finger under Dib's nose.

Dib moved a hand up to rub at his nose while moving his eyes up to glare at Zim. "Yeah, well, I already tried asking the person that's supposed to see this so called future and got nothing." He reached his hand out to snatch his glasses back and place them on his face. His gaze moved back to the floor after and his mood still became worse. "And three days just doesn't seem like enough time to stop the world from ending. If you knew about this, then why couldn't you tell me earlier so I would have more time?"

The corner of Zim's lips upturned more, mischievous, shameless, and oh so guilt-free. He leaned more, crawling with his hands, stepping with them until one rested on Dib's lap, his other on the Dib's other leg. It was there Zim was able to lean up to Dib's lips and steal a kiss there. "And you promised me a proper date this weekend too."

Dib glanced towards Zim's face once more after the brief kiss. The words had him letting out a small sigh and looking down just as quickly at the other's hands. "I guess that's completely called off." He couldn't help the small smirk that tried to come to his face as he went on. "Hopefully, after all of this is over, I'll be able to take you out next weekend instead."

Zim frowned a pout. "But there might not be a 'next weekend'." He crawled over, invading Dib's lap, one arm slipped around the boy's neck while his other hand sought Dib's hand. He rested his forehead against Dib's, speaking close to the other's mouth. "We should enjoy what little time you have left." He took Dib's hand by the wrist and rested it on his naked thigh. Resting his hand on top of the other's, he ran Dib's palm slowly up and down the green skin there. "You should enjoy Zim while you still have him."

The sudden forwardness surprised Dib for only a split second until he remembered exactly who it was in his lap. Feeling the skin under his fingers, Dib slowly ran his nails along Zim's thigh. "I thought I was on a time limit?" The words were spoken with a small grin, and despite them, he still moved his tongue out to press the metal stud against the other's lips, teasing just a bit.

Zim let go of Dib's hand, letting the boy have free range on his thigh. He poked the stud, toying with it between fingers as he spoke. "You might as well have fun before you die." His grin was mean; no faith had in the boy's ability. Zim let go of the piercing, his tongue slipping out to play with the stud instead, his arm moving to join his other, draping around Dib's shoulder.

Dib gave out a small groan at the sudden tug to his piercing and that tongue that always felt so foreign. He let Zim do as he pleased for a few more seconds before he pressed their lips together, invading the other's mouth. No longer feeling Zim's hand on his own allowed him to dig his nails into the green skin a bit more, as he moved them further up the bare thigh and towards the inside of the short dress.

Zim press back hard into the kiss, lashing his tongue against the other's and that studded piercing. His teeth grazed against the boy's tongue and bit against the other's lips, fingers desperately running through hair to grip a fist full to keep Dib's mouth close. Of course when Dib's hand slipped under his dress Zim pulled back and smacked the boy's hand away, smacking Dib across the cheek for the kiss as well; hypocrisy, thy's name is Zim. "Okay, I think you're having _too_ much fun now." He grinned in rather good cheer.

The sudden hit against his cheek caused Dib to let out a hiss of pain, since his head still hurt to begin with. He turned his head back around to level a hard glare on Zim for only a few moments before a small grin came to his lips. Without much warning, he moved both of his hands up to push at Zim's shoulders, changing their position so that the other teen was under him on the floor as he straddled the smaller teen's waist. "I don't know. You didn't seem to be minding it too much." With those words, he leaned his head down and licked at the green skin of Zim's throat.

Zim squirmed, the tongue at his throat tickled and he let out a giggle. His eyes snapped wide when he did, and clapped his hand over his mouth. He scowled. He wasn't supposed to be liking the abrupt forwardness, nor being on the bottom, and without control. His hand left his mouth to push Dib away by his shoulder. "M, no. Down boy." But Dib didn't seem to be obeying. So Zim lifted a leg up, foot on Dib's chest he kicked the boy off him. "Down!" He immediately straightened and tugged the bottom of his short dress on his legs. "Don't you have a world to save anyway? Times plittering away. Or- at least a skool to pretend to be going to." Zim huffed.

Dib rubbed at his chest while letting out a small groan. As soon as he got his breath back, Dib moved to stand up despite how horrible he felt at the moment. "Fine, whatever. I guess I should try and figure out something." He walked over to the couch with a few wobbly steps and picked up his bag, slinging it over his shoulder. "You don't seem half as worried about any of this as I am. Normally if someone thinks the world is going to end, they would be in a panic. You really are a strange one." He leaned down to give a final kiss to the side of Zim's head before he walked toward the door. "Just at least believe me a little when I say everything will be okay."

Zim rested his hands on his knees, peering up at Dib with one visible eye after the kiss. "Dib.." he started in a rather small voice that wasn't normal for him. "Can we..." he glanced to the side, lowering his head almost shyly "go to skool today? One last time?" His gaze finally fell full on the floor. "Cuz... Zim won't be attending Monday." His eyes flicked back up to Dib.

Dib looked back to Zim with narrowed eyes for a moment. At first he had been about to ask the other teen what was wrong considering the tone to his voice, but thought better of it. Instead he gave a small smile and nodded his head just a bit. "Sure, if that's what you want." He gave a small shrug and shook his head. "Although, you're going to go in there smelling much better than I am. I still smell like a fireplace."

Zim scoffed with a mean sarcastic smirk, waving a weak wristed hand. "No one will know the difference. Trust me."


	14. Chapter 14

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular run of the mill emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Tanalilt

Chapter 14

Late afternoon, the skool hadn't missed the two much in their great absence. The world had kept on spinning, and classes ran their usual course. Though a good many students took it in themselves to 'extend' their lunch break, hanging around in packs that were either hounded by suspicious teachers or ignored completely altogether.

Food littered the ground from the recent lunch break (and its many predecessor of lunch breaks before it). Zim kicked a half filled cola can, splattering the off coloured liquid along the concrete as the can clattered away. He walked hand in hand with Dib along the walk that headed towards the main doors. Though he couldn't help but notice how those outside turned their and quickly walked away, or darted inside the skool and those inside ducked down to peer eerily through the windows.

"... I knew you stunk, Dib-pet, but I didn't think you smelled _that _ bad." Zim commented off handedly, watching the shades on the blinds instantly come down on one window, several eyes then tried to peek through as subtly as they could.

Dib only narrowed his eyes at Zim for a few moments as he glanced sideways at the teen. "Gee, thanks." He turned his attention back to the skool, glancing around for only a moment at how sneaky everyone seemed to be acting. As they walked up the stairs to the doors, he shrugged his shoulders, no longer caring about what was really going on. "Whatever. I gave up trying to figure everyone else out, nor did I really want to from the start." He opened one of the doors and stood aside, letting go of Zim's hand as he did. "After you."

A blur of purples rushed out the door, but finding no door there anymore, the student ended up slamming her outstretched hands into Zim instead, crashing head on into the green boy with a wide eyed look of terror. With a sharp cry of surprise Zim flew back, crashing rather painfully on his back, legs strewn with feet propped up on the last steps. Zita flailed her arms, swaying on the top step herself, to keep herself from crashing forward and falling onto Zim.

Dib had little time to react to the sudden situation, too surprised to really figure out what had happened. He did know that the purple blur, that he now knew was Zita, was flailing like a mad woman and in danger of falling over. Realizing this, he quickly let go of the door and moved behind the girl. He placed both his hands on her shoulders before moving her arms down to try to steady her without really thinking about what he was doing. "Calm down if you don't you're gonna fall anyway."

Zita chirped and jerked backwards from the edge of steps once Dib had caught her balance for her. Her back bumped into Dib's front and quickly she spun around to attach herself to his front, grasping his shirt tightly. She gaped at him with wide eyes, her mouth moving before any real sound came out. She bounced up and down as if that would get herself to talk, but she was in much too much in excited panic to be coherent so quick. "DIB!" Zita finally got the boy's name out. "You have to come with me!" She let go of Dib's hand and clasped the boy's hand in both of hers to tug away from the door, her cheeks blushing over at the contact. "Quick!" She tugged more. "If you don't you'll _die_!"

Zim looked at them from staring blankly at the sky, murmuring off handedly "Banana tentacles."

The last little part caused Dib to blink a few times. Why was everyone suddenly so obsessed with death lately? "That's a bit drastic don't you think?" The fact Zita was tugging him was only causing him to loose his balance more and more, and her loud shouting hadn't helped his head. "What about Zim?" He glanced back at the fallen teen for a moment before he quickly looked back at the girl and their hands, stopping her tug of war with his body and standing where he was as he did. "And stop with the touching, it's annoying. I know how to walk."

From inside the skool, down the main hall loud stomping echoed through. Something was nearing quite quickly, quite fiercely, practically shaking the hall with it's steps. And whatever it was, it sounded mean and angry.

Zita almost jumped out of her skin, her violet eyes growing wider and completely terrified. She clung to Dib's arm, tugging urgently. "He's coming. He's coming. He's coming. C'mon Dib! He's crazy. He said he's going to smash you and Zim up until your paste is paste."

Zim bolted upright, his eyes wide, though not too brilliantly. "Zim doesn't like being paste."

Dib's own eyes were wide as he looked back to the skool. His sudden worry about touch vanished for at least the small moment. "Yeah, neither do I." He yanked himself free of the insane tugging and hurried back over towards Zim. He placed both of his hands under the teen's arms, his voice becoming a bit panicked as he spoke. "Come on, Zim. Screw Skool, we're going home. Hurry up."

Zim slipped his arms around Dib's neck, trying his best to stand up with Dib's help. "Aww. But- I wanted to." he started, still not completely with it. Then he paused. "Wait-" he blinked "Whose home? Mines light years away."

Zita suddenly screamed from behind them, and the main doors crashed open so hard it was any wonder that the glass in them didn't shatter. A strong hand fiercely gripped the back of Dib's shirt, yanking him back with a growl.

Dib had flinched some at Zita's scream, but had no time to say anything because of how suddenly he was pulled back. The action caused him to immediately let go of Zim and let out a loud yelp. He struggled for a few moments before realizing it wasn't really getting him anywhere. So he gave in, and slowly turned his head, praying that it wasn't really as bad as he thought it was.

Gaping teeth with a new thick, bruised upper lip, fresh from the game yesterday, along with beady eyes baring down, all sneered down at Dib with murderous intent. Slug held Dib like a bull dog who held fresh meat in their jowls; he was foaming just as much as a rabid canine.

"I've been look'n for you, glasses!" He literally spat his words in Dib's face, his shout like vicious thunder. "Yous gunna pay for what happened! No one does that! What you did!"

Zim had fallen with a squeak. He held his head, shaking it to get sense back in and hair out of his eyes. What he saw caused him to scramble back on his rear along the ground. He didn't want to be paste; paste was a horrible thing to be. So Zim tried to crawl away as silently as he could while Slug was busy.

Dib couldn't help but groan as he raised an arm to wipe at his face. A shower was sounding better and better as time passed. As soon as his arm dropped back down he narrowed his eyes on Slug as best he could, despite the fact it was quite obvious he was scared of the fact the bigger teen had him in a vice grip. "Mad that I got to Zim first? I didn't know you wanted a boyfriend so badly." He gave a weak smirk. "Jealous maybe?" He pinched his fingers together. "Just a tiny bit?"

"You're crazy!" Zita called, still at the front of the skool.

Dib's words earned him a large fist across his face. Slug glowered down at Dib. "You watch your mouth!" His ground what little teeth were still in his mouth together; they almost sparked like flint. "Or you'll be drinking the swirl." He caught glimpse of something pink and green trying to sneek off along the ground, and with his other hand he snatched up Zim by the back of his short dress, dragging him back.

Zim let out a startled squeak, then a rather offended squeak as he desperately clung to the bottom of his skirt to keep it from riding up; which it was in constant danger of considering Slug's grip.

"Gotchyer _girlfriend_ too, glasses. Now you two can dunk the swirl together." Slug laughed hard, dragging either of them back towards the skool.

"You have such charming friends." Zim lowered his head as if his thick bangs saved him of the humiliating situation.

The hit to his face had caused Dib to wonder if by the end of the day he was going to have a concussion. He was sure he was going to at least have a nasty bruise on his cheek, the way it was throbbing. Slug's words barely registered, considering he wasn't really paying any attention to what was going on after that, but he did notice that he wasn't the only one being dragged away anymore. The fact that he also heard Zim's voice caused him to struggle as best he could, one of his hands moving to hit anywhere on Slug that he was able to. "Leave Zim out of it, you jerk."

Slug easily ignored the hits Dib gave, they might as well have been a swat from a fly in comparison to most of the blows he'd gotten on the field. But when he got to the door, the small purple haired girl stood in the way, arms outstretched. Her little heart pounded so frantically, like a birds; standing up to someone like Slug, it wasn't like her at all. But- she couldn't let Slug kill Dib; not without writing at least one poem about her, and maybe if she saved him-...

"S-s-s-stop!" Zita's voice squeaked in terror, rather than the brave sound she wanted to make.

Slug eyed her, putting Zim down to pick Zita up with one hand, set her aside open the door, pick Zim up again and continued to drag either of them down the hall.

Zita blinked "Oh-oh-kaaaay.."

Zim lashed out his hands and gripped the handle of the door for dear life and the stars beyond. "Zim doesn't want to be paste!" He screamed in a shrill voice; some tough soldier he was. Slug barely faltered in step, and it pulled Zim rather thin, but the thin boy was stronger than he looked and he held fast to the door. Unfortunately, the fabric of his dress wasn't, and the stretched fabric could be heard ripping. He kicked his legs and screamed in a pitched voice "THIS IS INDECENT TREATMENT!!"

Dib was still trying to struggle as best he could despite the fact Slug just seemed to be ignoring each hit. The odd ripping sound caused Dib to slowly stop what he was doing and Zim's loud yell had him flinching. The teen was louder than most girls in the skool, and that was an accomplishment. He turned his eyes as best he could towards Zim and they widened a bit as he saw how tightly the other was holding to the door. As impressed as he was, he was still worried over the fact Zim's clothes didn't seem to be holding up over the ordeal. "Slug, let him go!" He tried to kick his legs, hoping maybe that would help, but his legs would only reach so far.

Slug grunted at Dib's kicks, the boy was far too annoyingly thin and squirmy for his own good. In frustration, he yanked the back of Zim's skirt to try and pull the green boy free of the door. The sharp rip could be heard all through the halls, and all that Slug was left walking away with in his hand was a piece of pink striped fabric.

Zim blinked when he was free, though his hips felt a slight chill. Glancing down he let out a squeak and let go of the door to pull his dress down to cover his black underclothes. "IDIOT! I hate this planet!" He kicked the skool door hard.

"You wanna let go, is it?" Slug growled his aggravation, tossing the torn fabric away in one hand while throwing Dib against the lockers with the other. He grabbed the front of Dib's shirt, pulling the boy up to shove him into the lockers again. "How's that!? EH!?"

Dib gave out a pained groan at the treatment. Both his back and head had collided with the metal pretty hard, considering the bigger teen's strength. For a few moments, all he could do was let his head sway from side to side even after Slug had spoken so loudly near his face. Finally after a few moments he lifted his head only a bit with narrowed eyes, and spit right in the teen's face, a small scowl forming on his own after.

"Ugh!" Slug wiped his face with a hand, wiping his hand on Dib's shirt. "Disgusting little fruit! Only another creepy fairy could like you, glasses! But I'm a'gunna squish you both like bugs, make you think better about pull'n a fast one on Slug." He then slammed his fist, connecting with glasses and face alike.

Zim physically flinched, and flinched hard. He covered his eyes with a hand, though parted fingers to peek. Evolution hadn't been kind to the gene pool. If anything it needed a chlorine bath.  
A crowd was starting to gather around to watch the onslaught; thick skinned jock versus dark creepy loner- it was like a train wreck needing to be watched.

Forget the end of the world - it looked like Dib wouldn't be surviving today.

Around all the pain, Dib heard a crack and hoped that it was just his glasses and not something in his face. As much as it hurt, he really wouldn't have doubted it, though. As soon as he was able to, he opened his eyes and noticed that his lenses were indeed broken, and barely let out a noise at his horrible vision. "That didn't even sting." The words were said in a weak voice and as he said them he could taste a metallic liquid on his lips and knew exactly what it was, which caused him to groan. Whether it was from his lips or his nose, he didn't want to find out.

Zim glanced around at the crowd that had gathered all around him now, talking non-too-quietly about the fight. He could slip away now, into the crowd, and be completely unnoticed; get away completely Slug-free. He wouldn't have to return - Monday was doomsday anyway. Slug and all the rest of humanity would be fallen to rubble. None would be the wiser. Zim bit the point of his finger hard, glancing back to watch Dib take another punch to the face, and again Zim flinched. Dib was starting to leak from his face. It was such a pathetic sight, but still he stood up for more, taking another in the gut this time. Zim lowered his hand back down with the other to keep his dress held down. He should leave, leave now but-... But what? There shouldn't have been a 'but'.

The green boy shifted from where he stood, stepping back to sift behind the gathering of students and their inane chatter. Back, back until his pak softly clinked against the lockers lining the walls there. " '_But_'.. the vulgar prime ape ripped my dress." Zim hissed low and angry to himself; that was a good enough 'but' for now. He then disappeared in the mass swarm of students.

Dib had to gasp for air at the last punch he received. One of his hands moved up to grip at the arm that held him up, nails trying to scratch at the skin. He really couldn't take anymore, despite how much he tried to pretend it didn't hurt. He didn't want to make any sounds, but it was becoming difficult not to. The blood on his face was starting to drip onto his clothes as well as the floor, and he couldn't help but lick it away finding the feel of it annoying.

Slug laughed. "Not so tough anymore are we? Eh? And where's your little girlfriend? Ran away like a scared little girl didn't she." He laughed even harder, pressing Dib back even harder against the locker. "Pathetic. I'll that skirt wearing freak and break his pretty face in. Then we'll see who says what about who." His nostrils flared angrily as he bared his teeth in a grinning sneer.

Dib flinched and let out the noise he was holding in as he was pressed back against the metal. He just barely opened his eyes at Slug's words and tried to take in another sharp breath as he looked around the crowd he was just noticing. Everything looked much too distorted through his glasses, but even then he still saw no blur of green or pink and felt a little relieved that Zim had gotten away from the mess. He gave out another small groan and turned his eyes back to Slug. "You better not touch him." It was a weak threat considering the position he was in, but a threat all the same.

The threat had Slug snorting horrid laughter. He raised a fist, his whole bulky frame practically shaking with the hilarious laughter. He opened his mouth to make some snarky come back when a someone practically leapt down from no where and smashed something hard against his head.

"THAT'S for ripping my dress!" Zim raised his back-pak again to whack it hard Slug's head. "This is for being a hideous monkey pervert!" Again he smashed it against Slug's head, again and again. "And that was for crawling out of the primordial ooze, waste-scrapings! You sick, violent, primitive, hairy, bi-ped!" Zim paused to take in a heavy breath, raising the pak one last time to smash it into Slug's face. "And that's for- for- uh..." Slug fell limp on the ground with a wet squish. "Getting my pak filthy with your face juice! Ew!" Zim wiped it furiously on his sleeve and slipped his back-pak with a click back on and moved to face Dib "Oh, hi Dib-paste." He gave a simple wave, as if he were there just as casually as passing by.

Dib had watched the scene with wide eyes, as best he could. As soon as he was let go, his body slid down the locker until he was sitting on the floor, staring at Slug's limp form. When Zim spoke to him, he tried his best to lift his head to look at the other teen, but the most he could do was raise his eyes and stare blankly at the other for only a few moments before giving out a pained groan. With that, he slumped over to the side, not really caring that the floor wasn't the cleanest thing in the skool and his blood was coating it at the moment. He just wanted to lay down and never get up.

Zim quirked his lips, narrowing his eyes in a brief second of amusement. He completely gave up his dignity, giving up on holding his dress down as he knelt down to reach over and hoist Dib back up to at least sitting. "You aren't very good at fighting. But at least you can take a beating very well. Come, lean on Zim. He'll take you home. Skool doesn't deserve you, anyway." He let the boy slump against him, reaching up to grab a lock to help him pull either of them to stand, since he couldn't do much else with everyone staring at him so hard (mainly at the torn away lower half of his dress). "You might need to tell Zim where you live though." Zim smirked a little. He carried Dib the best he could, though it was more like dragging the boy along, since Dib was taller.

Dib didn't protest any at the sudden help, but he did give out a small noise at the little bit of pain it caused. He tried to keep in step beside Zim, but his steps were slow and sluggish even if the teen was helping him. All he wanted to do was lean against Zim and forget about the pounding in his head and the horrible pain in his gut. The only answer that came from him at Zim's words was a small sound as he tried to stay at least a little coherent.

Zita held the door open for them, letting them pass through before she let it fall shut. She bit her nail as she watched them continue to leave. Quickly she cupped her hands around her mouth. "You were very brave Dib!"

Zim scoffed quietly. "See, I told you she wanted to have your love spawn, Dib-pet." He brushed away the fragments of glass from Dib face, plucking the thick glasses from the boy's face and tossing the useless things aside. "You.. -you make a terrible body guard." Zim smiled for lack of anything better, sighed and shook his head, picking the small pieces of glass that gashed themselves across skin and buried themselves in and flicked them away.

Dib only tried to give a weak smirk at Zita's shout and Zim's words, but the sudden hand on his face caused him to flinch. "Ah..." He couldn't help but let out the pained sound and tried to close his mouth after. Each piece of glass that was picked out just caused him to tense up more and more and he tried to pull away from Zim's hand even, if the other was just trying to help. "At least you didn't get hurt."

Zim paused in his motion before he finally drew his hand away, wiping the blood on his claws on his already ruined dress. "Hmf. Well, my clothes have seen better days. But yes, Zim is fine. Unlike you. You look horrid. Like you stuffed your face in a blender with baseball bats instead of blades." He pulled another small shard, this one below Dib's lower eye. "But you'll live." He looked over the shard, opaque with blood, but flicked it aside like the rest. "Or die. Whatever. Rest against Zim, I'll have you home quickly. Just close your eyes." Claws brushed the boy's dark hair from his face, though most of it stuck to it in the bloody mess.

The last shard picked out caused Dib to let out a louder noise. When he felt Zim's hands only brushing over his face instead of picking at it he finally relaxed. He didn't feel the need to argue against the other's words, nor did he want to. If Zim was willing to let him rest in such a position and take care of him then so be it. With only a small sound he rested his head against the teen's shoulder and closed his eyes, letting Zim lead the way.

It didn't take long for Zim to drag Dib home, after dragging the location out of the brutally beaten boy. When he was sure Dib was quite out of it enough, he took to sleek metal spider limbs from his pak, short cutting it over roof tops, back alleys and back yards; the quickest way between to points, after all.

When Zim got there he gave the sight a rather disapproving look. "My house is better." His spider limbs had slipped back into his back-pak when he reached the street, having lugged the boy so far, he lugged him just that much more to the front door; what a pain. "Is it unlocked? Is your parental unit home?" They were a sight that would definitely raise questions, more the bloody mess that was Dib's face, than the green kid in the torn shirt and no pants. Zim tried the door anyway, without waiting for an answer, holding Dib tight with one arm.

The door was indeed locked tight. All the sudden moving around had roused Dib somewhat, even though he really wanted to just stay as he was against Zim. He squinted one eye at the shorter teen as he tried the door, and slowly shook his head, trying to gain some of Zim's attention. "You can't get in without a key. My dad is at work and my sister is still in skool." He pointed a weak hand under them at the mat. "There's an extra one under there. I don't feel like digging through my bag right now. Use that."

Zim's gaze flicked down. Of course, the key had to be _under_ something, in the _down_ direction, when he had something heavy and useless against him. It was the order of all things in the universe, or at least _this_ planet. Zim shifted Dib around so the boy rested on his back, making it easier to crouch down and still cart the boy around with ease. With a please sound Zim found the key under the matt and stood back up to unlock the door. "What a stupid place to hide something that important." With another pleased noise Zim figured out how to successfully unlock the door, pushing it open so he could walk in, closing it after him with a kick of foot. "Sooo- where is it that I dump you?"

The house inside was average size. To the left off from the front door was the living room where just a couch, chair and a television sat. To the right of the door was another room that seemed much larger and seemed to be part of the kitchen, considering the cupboards that could just barely be seen from the front door. There was a long walkway between the two that was in front of them and it was there that Dib pointed. A long row of stairs near the end of it.

"My room is up those stairs, the first door on the right. You mind helping me up there?" He dropped his hand back down and gripped what was left of Zim's dress with it instead. "I'd rather be up there than down here."

Zim sighed, heavily; he might as well. He was already a packing mule for most of the way, might as well go the full length. With a grunt, he headed in the direction, clomping up the stairs with Dib on his back. He kicked Dib's door open, walking straight to the bed where he dumped his passenger off.

Dib let out a groan when he was placed on the bed, narrowing his eyes on Zim as best he could, then wishing he hadn't of - the action only hurt his face worse. Instead, he gave up trying to show any kind of emotion and lay on his back, one of his hands raising to point over to a black bean bag chair in the corner of the room. "Make yourself at home." He tried to shrug. "Or sit on the bed. I don't care." His hand dropped so he could pull one of the sheets close and used it to try and wipe the blood off of his face, not having any towels around him at the moment.

Zim glanced around himself; everything was either black, messy or strewn across or over something. He made a sour face, this was hardly a place he'd want to stay in, let alone live in. He couldn't grasp how Dib could spend most of his time here; though it did look well lived in.

Suddenly Zim's pink dress flew into Dib's face. "Here. Use this instead. It's soiled anyway, and useless to me now." Zim shook his head, tsking as he rubbed his naked arms and chest, chilled now. "So unsanitary." He took it in himself to search for a long, _clean_ shirt of Dib's to use. But everything he found he rejected with a face of disgust or stuck his tongue out to and called 'too ugly'.

Dib gave an annoyed noise, but took the torn piece of clothing anyway, discarding his sheet. He used the pink material to rub at his face as gently as possible. When he was able to look over at Zim, he noticed that the other teen was pretty much half naked. Had he been coherent, he would have actually cared much more than he did at that moment, but all he could do was groan and keep caring for his battle wounds. "Look in my bottom drawer. I have a few long sleeved shirts in there." He pointed a foot towards his dresser.

Zim followed the direction of the pointed toes and pulled the drawer open to dig through it. He tossed a few clothes he found unfit from it until he found something 'acceptable'; a black long sleeved shirt with sharp lines and curls that made some sort of cross like design, Zim chose it because the markings reminded him of Irken letters. He slipped it on, wiggling into it. It was far too big and long for his frame, but that suited Zim just fine. It was comfy, and he kept the lower part of his face in the collar of it as he snuggled the material. "Zim's now."

Dib pulled the cloth away from his face for a moment at Zim's words so he could see what the teen had picked out. After he had eyed it for a moment, trying to see what it was, he shrugged his shoulders. "If you want it. I thought I had lost that thing." He let go of what was now a red stained dress and tried to sit up on the bed. Immediately he regretted it, and gave a small groan, lying back down with his head on the pillow. "I hate Skool."

Zim shifted his hips to the side so he could arch a little to glance at Dib. "I like it. It's so- so- raw. Nothing like that i _ever_ /i happed at the establishments of training that I went to. If what happened today and the day before at where Zim was originally trained- HA! You would be gone pretty fast. Toleration is at a nil. That's what makes us all such good sold--s-students. Yes. I said students." He looked around shifty eyed. "Though, of course, what doesn't get caught- doesn't hurt you." Though the grin at the nostalgia of such wicked things couldn't be seen from under the shirt, it was there.

Something shifted near Zim, and it wasn't Dib. The green boy moved to look at what exactly it was he heard but when Zim saw what it really was he let out a startled shriek and leapt back, back pedaling until he nearly fell on the bed and on Dib. He jabbed his finger towards the cage, though his scream probably scared the little black animal more than Zim was scared of it. "It's LIVING-- there!"

"My head." Dib groaned the words because of Zim's shrieking and the sudden movement near the bed. He opened one eye up to glance over at the scared teen. "What are you talking about?" Once more he sat up, trying his best to ignore the pain as he looked to where Zim pointed. He squinted then stared for a few moments at the cage before actually speaking up again. "You're kidding." He turned his attention back to Zim. "It's only my rabbit."

"You have a _living_ thing in your room??" Zim tugged his shirt up closer to his face. He paused a moment, letting it slide down a moment. "Wait- do you eat it?" He glanced at Dib in all seriousness.

Dib stared back at Zim before he tried to narrow his eyes. "You have a freakish green dog in your house. Do you eat that?" He turned his attention away from Zim without waiting for an answer and tried to stand up from the bed. It took a while, but he was finally able to steady himself after a bit without tipping over. Once he was able to walk he made his way over to the cage and opened it up, moving his hands inside to try and capture the small black rabbit. It avoided his hands a few times, but he finally grabbed it and pulled it out, holding it close even as it squirmed. As soon as it was in his hands he made his way back to the bed and sat down holding the rabbit out to Zim. "See, nothing to be scared of."

Zim eyed the animal before gingerly stretching out a hand to poke-poke its head. He tilted his head, closing one eye to stare through the other to give the thing a analyzing gaze. He flicked his eyes back up to Dib. "I still say it looks delish. Have you ever tasted it?"

Dib quickly brought the rabbit back to his chest away from Zim's fingers. "No, I've never tasted it. I would never do such a thing." He tried to scowl, but it hurt his face too much so, he only let out a sigh instead. "I can't believe you would even suggest it. This is the only living thing I can stand in this house. Why would I wanna go and even think of eating it?" A small tug on his shirt caused him to avert his attention away from Zim and down only to notice that the rabbit had taken to nibbling at this shirt. "Hey, stop that." He tried to pull the small animal away from his already beaten up shirt, but not with much success.

"Awww. Isn't that cute." Zim pointed to the rabbit. "It's a cannibal. It's going to eat you before you eat it. How spirited. It's such a little trooper." He leaned over and pet the animal's head with a finger gently. "Go team go. Eat that Dib. I've tasted him, he is quite delish. Though a bit spicy. You should eat him in small periods, you'll fill up less." He licked the corner of his mouth, curling it at his lips before it slipped back in. "Then I will eat you." Zim flicked his pink eyes up at the rather disgruntled Dib. "What do you call this entrée of nose wigglies?"

Dib was about to scold Zim once again for threatening to eat his rabbit, but the last question caused him to stop. For a few seconds he hesitated before actually answering. "Well, she doesn't actually have a name." Once more Dib tried to get the rabbit away from his shirt, much more successful than last time. It only caused the rabbit to start chewing on his pants instead. "I could never really think of a name, so I just didn't bother with it." He let out an annoyed noise and tried to pull the animal away once more.

Zim stared blankly. "You.. never named your dinner--I mean pet. I totally said pet- and not snack food." He tapped his fingers together pursing his lips, giving a quick cough into a fist he wagged a finger at Dib. "How long have you had this tasty snack? So plump, with its shiny sweet glaze.. and.. its adorable twitchy feelers and nose. So sticky saccharine I could just-- just eat her right up." He smacked his lips, looking intently upon the little bunny. Zim clasped his hands together. "Just one taste!" He plopped himself down beside Dib. "I promise I won't swallow her whole." He made grabbie hands for the animal.

Dib only stared at Zim blankly for a few moments before he shook his head. "No way. I'm not letting you eat her, Zim, so just get over it." He was finally able to pull himself free from the rabbit's teeth, and instead of letting her chew at him again, he placed the small animal on the bed to let her roam around in between the two of them. She didn't really do much roaming as much as just sitting. "Anyway, I've only had her for a couple of years. I used to get lonely sitting up here by myself, so I figured that having a pet would cure that. Nothing really big though, like a dog or anything. That's how I got her." He moved his fingers along the rabbit's fur after he spoke.

"Wow." Zim spoke up still staring at Dib. "You're a sad lonely little monkey man." He tilted his head. "Aren't you." He looked down to the little creature, laying down to get a closer look at it. "Mmmm. Delish-ish. So fluffy and soft, like a pastry good. Like moofies." Zim lifted one of the animal's ears up to look it over. "Your moofies is eating your bed's clothing. I think you should let her feast upon your flesh. Get it over with. It's just better that way, Dib-pet. Accept the fate. Pet eat pet. It's the natural order of the universe." Zim nodded sagely.

Dib shook his head, but it was making his headache worse, so he stopped. "She always chews on things, but I wasn't able to feed her since I've been out lately. So, she's probably doing it a lot more now." He glanced up at Zim and then back down to the rabbit. "Moofies, huh?" He gave a small shrug then moved to lay back down on the bed, keeping the rabbit exactly where she was so Zim could continue to look at her. He still felt so out of it, and everything on his face still hurt. "I'll feed her later when I have the energy. I feel like a car ran me over and left me for dead." He raised a hand up to wave it in Zim's direction for only a small second. "Don't eat her." It dropped back down.

Zim huffed, though mostly out of disappointment. "I won't eat the Moofies. She's for looking at and keeping the Dib-sad-and-lonely company. I get it, I understand." He bravely ran a hand over the bunny. So soft; such a strange and pathetic creature. It fit the Dib so well. "Zim will feed the Moofies. What do Moofies eat? Aside from Dib shirt, pants and bed sheets? Unless you wish to sacrifice your Dib body to the Moofies cannibal. Your cause will be honored, and her belly full." Zim reached over and poked Dib's forehead, a few times. "Since you're going to die anyway, why let the fresh meat go to waste?"

Dib looked cross-eyed at Zim's finger before he weakly swatted it away. "There's some rabbit food in the cabinet that the cage sits on. You can feed her some of that. I would usually give her some lettuce too, or something of the sort, but we're running low and I don't need Gaz chewing me out because I took her salad stuff." He shrugged his shoulders just a bit. "She can make do with just her own food for now I guess." He tried his best to scowl at Zim, but it wasn't working. "And would you lay off with that dying stuff. Why can't you believe me when I say I'm going to stop the end of the world from happening. I pretty much look like road kill trying to protect you from Slug, and you still have like no faith in me at all."

Zim stuck out his tongue as he pushed up from the bed. "And when you say 'protect' you mean 'stand there and become face smash bologna'." He squatted down, looking through for the aforementioned food. "All the same, I suppose Zim should give you some credit. You were very 'brave', as Zita said, taking each punch to the head like you did." He found a baggie full of food pellets with a picture of a rabbit that was so dementedly happy, it was eerie. With a happy noise, he stood up to sit back down on the bed. " 'Better you than me' I think the saying goes. But yes, you did do a fine job at taking it for me. Even though in the end Zim had to rescue his body guard." He dumped some pellets beside the rabbit. "I suppose if all else fails you can let whatever is going to end the world smash into your face as well." Zim giggled a cackle into a hand. "Your head _is_ big enough to shield an entire planet."

"You're such a caring boyfriend." The sarcasm was obvious in Dib's voice, and he kept it at that as he moved an arm up to cover his eyes. Having them closed still wasn't helping the pain, so maybe shielding them from the outside world would. For a while only the sounds of the rabbit, which had so affectionately been called Moofies, could be heard chewing away at her food. The silence didn't last long as Dib let out an aggravated noise and dropped his arm back down. The weight of it only hurting worse. "I think my head is going to explode."

Zim paused from petting the rabbit to look over to the abused boy. He gave a small sigh, shaking his head causing his thick dark hair to sway. "Here." He crawled to Dib, kneeling beside him like before. "Rest your head on Zim." He patted his partial naked lap gesturing for Dib to rest his head upon. "I'll help to keep the grey matter inside from breeching your cranial structure."

Dib groaned a bit as he moved around, grateful that he would be getting a little comfort finally. He was glad that it didn't take long for him to move his head from the pillow to Zim's lap and gave out a small sigh after he was rested there. Even with the switch his head still hurt, but there was really nothing he could do about that and only nuzzled his head against Zim's lap, hoping that did something to make the pain go away.

"I've been punched. I've been, well, a lot of things that you wouldn't be able to handle.. back at my 'old' skool. Laying like this, on someone's lap always felt good." Zim turned Dib's head so he could look at it better, at the symmetry. Human's didn't have antenna to pet, but the head shape was the same; skull, brain, facial features. He pressed the padding of his finger to Dib's temple, his other resting next to it, minding the pointed ends. Gently he trained his fingers in a circular motion, pressing harder in certain places, gentler in others as he massaged his fingers so very slowly at the sides of Dib's head. "They used to do this when Zim got out of a bad situation.. hehm. It always made Zim feel better." The corners of his lips perked.

Each small action caused Dib to give a pleased sound. Zim's fingers were slowly easing the tension in his head away, and after a few moments he began to lean into each touch. "It really does feel so much better." The words were almost whispered as Dib spoke them. He peaked one eye open to look up at Zim. The other teen's words had caused him to become a little curious. He had remembered an earlier conversation they had. One that had him feeling jealous for a few moments. "They?"

"Oh." Zim blinked, looking away as he realized he'd been much too casual with his words. "F-friends. Just friends. Close friends. Y-yea." He cleared his throat, moving his thumbs to the center of Dib's brow, parting to run down against each arch of brow ridge over each eye. Zim looked back down, curious about the strange feature that followed from the brow ridge, another ridge that lead down to lips with two holes poked into it; the 'nose' was so ugly. "Your face is swelling, and changing colours. That can't be healthy." Zim pointed out, changing the focus of topic to observation.

Dib closed his eyes once more as he let out a defeated sort of sound. "It's all bruising up already. I thought it would take longer than that. Oh well." One of his hands toyed with the sheet below him, twisting it between his fingers. "I'll probably have to put some ice on it pretty soon. I can't just stay like this, and the cuts from my glasses need to be bandaged up." He let out a small sigh. "My lip will just have to heal on it's own." He gave a small groan. "I hate my life."

"I hate it too." Zim agreed sarcastically. "But, it is the weekend. No skool. No Slug. Ever again." He leaned down with a wry sort of grin, still continuing to rub the boy's temples, pushing the ache of pain away from the inside. "Take some small comfort from that, if you don't end up saving the world." He pressed a quick kiss to Dib's lips but sat back up and spat, raspberring several times, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. "Ew! Blood flavored kisses. Gross!"

Dib couldn't help but laugh at that, no matter how much the action still hurt to do. He tried to stop himself after a few moments, knowing that it would only upset Zim if he kept on. "It's your own fault. You should have known that would happen." He glanced to the side to make sure Moofies was still on the bed, and sure enough she was. The small rabbit was slowly falling asleep after having eaten every bit of food Zim had set out. Dib gave a small sigh, grateful that she was no longer chewing on his bed, and let his eyes close once more. "I'll get up and fix myself up later. I'm too comfy right now."

"Of course. Zim makes an amazing pillow." Zim wiped his mouth a few more times on the back of his gloved hand. He lightly ran the tips of his fingers over skin that wasn't gashed. "Nothing seems broken, or fractured." He pulled back Dib's lips to poke at the teeth. Human teeth were so ugly, they looked like chicklets, and the top caps of toothpaste tubes. "No lose teeth." Hands lowered, running from jaw back up to continue massage slow circles at temples and other places along the sides of Dib's head, more out of experimentation to see if there were different points of ease on the human head than Irken. "It just looks and feels worse than it is. How's your middle feel?" Zim laughed dryly.

"The Slug probably has several fractures and a head coma. If not dead. So. You got off easy, Dib-bodyguard." Zim smirked wryly. He could always use a subject from this planet for observation and experimentation; it could, in fact, buy Dib time. Knowing the results for beating a subject with their own limbs was very scientifically important. The information from the disemboweling alone was quite imperative! Sure autonomy diskettes could supply it, but hands on information was far more important (and fun).

All of the attention to his body caused Dib to blink his eyes open a few times. When he was finally able to speak, he answered Zim's question by lifting up his shirt a bit to look down at the spot where Slug had punched him. He couldn't help but be a little relieved that his piercing was still in place. He feared what would have happened had Slug punched that area on impact. "It's alright, just really sore." To prove his point, Dib moved a hand down to poke at the spot and gave a small yelp, quickly pulling his hand back after. "Yeah, really sore." He dropped his shirt back down and rested once more, still amazed by Zim's fingers. "Thanks for getting him off of me."

"You're of more use to Zim alive than dead." That was quite frank, but that was Zim.

"Thanks?" Dib squinted one eye open to look up at the other teen. "I think." He let out a tired noise as he relaxed once more and shut his eyes. "I shouldn't just be laying here. I have some time to myself, so I should use it to figure this end of the world stuff out." One of his hands moved up to run through the bits of his messed up hair, minding Zim's hands as he did. "I still don't know what I'm going to be doing, but, whatever."

"Get cleaned, patch up your face and go go go." Zim gave a loose shrug, it was most interesting being the cause right under, or rather over, Dib's nose, and the boy not even realizing it. It was so simple, so obvious, but that's what made it funny. And that's why Zim couldn't help but smile more, laughing to himself. "But I'll be expecting you tomorrow too, of course. Around seven, wasn't it? I want at least one more 'real' date before everything crumbles." He stuck out his tongue, looking up to think. "Hm. Something extravagant, big, to be remembered. Going out with a 'bang', much like the Earth, eh?" Zim cackled loudly.

The last few things Zim said caused Dib's mood to become worse. Not really caring how well Zim was helping him at the moment, Dib sat up from the teen's lap and rubbed at his own head. "I'm so sick of you saying things like that. If you didn't think I could help save whatever it is that's going to happen, then why did you tell me about it in the first place?" Even with how bad he continued to feel, he still stood up from the bed and walked over to pick Moofies up. The rabbit protested more than last time, since it had been sleeping, but Dib ignored it and placed her back in the cage. "You don't really seem to care about any of what could happen and I hate that. I want to try and stop _something_, but it's like you have no complete faith or trust in me at all."

Zim pouted. "Such an angry Dib. But I guess my lack of faith can't be helped I suppose." Considering, of course it couldn't be. "But Zim will give the benefit of the doubt." He wagged a finger. "But only because you're my boyfriend. Otherwise, you wouldn't be getting special treatment." He nodded and rested his hands on his lap. "So, then, what's your first course of action? Your 'step one of plan Save Our Ugly Planet'. I call it project SOUP for short." Zim gave a winning grin.

The question caused Dib to stop for a moment. He really had no idea how to answer that, and the name pretty much left him feeling hungry anyway. "I don't know. I really don't." He walked away from the cage and over to his dresser to pick through his clothes, so he would be ready after he took a shower. "I guess I could always go into my dad's room and use his computer to check up and see if anything unusual has been going on lately." He tried to pull a shirt free that was stuffed in too deep. "Just a few things on the internet, that's all" He threw the clothes he had picked out onto the bed. "I'm sure he won't mind. He probably won't even notice."

Zim slowly nodded, glancing down at his hands. "It's a start." Slowly he looked back up at the other. "Don't rule out anything. i Anything /i . Sometimes it really is the stupid reasons. It could be so silly, that you might just automatically rule it out." Zim closed his mouth a moment, his brow furrowing with an expression of seriousness that was alien to his face. "Don't do that. Okay?"

Dib looked back at the other teen for a bit before he slowly nodded his head. "Don't worry. I plan on looking over every single thing I can." He made his way back over to Zim and kneeled down, placing a kiss on the teen's forehead instead of his lips. When he pulled back he stood up straight once more and gave a small smile as best he could. "I'm going to go take a shower, get fixed up, and maybe grab something to eat. You're welcome to do whatever while I'm busy." He flicked Zim's hair aside before he finally turned to walk towards the door and walked out of the room.

Zim watched the other leave, quirking his lips in disapproval. "Oh yea. The human race is SO doomed." With a sigh he flopped over. "... Maybe I'll eat his Moofies."


	15. Chapter 15

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular tom-emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta **Kayla Riddle

Chapter 15

Eyes that were once more dawned with thick rimmed glasses stared up at a bright pink house that stuck out among the normalcy of the other homes around it. One gloved hand tapped at a lawn ornament that rested on the grass, as Dib tried to gather his courage and walk up to the door of the home in front of him. He had been standing in the same spot for what felt like hours, but what in reality had only been maybe ten minutes. The walkway wasn't getting any softer to stand on, and he was suddenly grateful he had decided to wear his trench coat, when a chill picked up, moving against the thin shirt he had gone about wearing. Anything to show off that piercing Zim loved so much.

With a heavy sigh, Dib looked away from the windows of the house and instead, towards the door. "This is what I get for being so distant. When I want to start dating, I'm a nervous wreck." He shook his head and moved his fidgety hand away from the lawn decoration, so he could cross both over his chest. With small steps, he finally gave in and made his way towards the door, reaching a hand out to press the doorbell. Patiently waiting as best he could.

The lawn animals slowly began to turn to continue their stare at Dib when the boy's back was turned. Not that a certain green boy inside had been watching Dib's every move outside since he'd been detected walking towards the property. And of course, the impatience hadn't caused the green boy himself to crawl all over his furniture restlessly, sitting upside down on the couch with feet tapping idly in the air.

And of course, most of all, the ringing of the doorbell didn't startle Zim causing him to fall off the couch and onto the floor a tangled mess of limbs.

From outside, Dib could hear the commotion of movement; things being kicked and curses of something being scolded. Inside foot steps galloped over in haste, and there was a long collective pause before the door was pulled open by a rather calm Zim; black with pink was the style today, and those useless suspenders were making a guest star appearance. He tilted his head and clicked his tongue. "Dibuh. I know you. You're... looking very... um, living today." He leaned against the door frame. "And the swelling has gone down, too. Good for you!" He pointed with mock optimistic enthusiasm.

Dib gave a small noise at Zim's words and only nodded his head a bit. The reminder of his face looking like it had met the end of a baseball bat didn't really help how he was feeling at the moment. One of his hands raised up to fidget with his earrings as he glanced to the side instead of at the teen in the doorway. "Yeah, it's not really as bad as it was yesterday." He blinked a few times when he noticed one of the lawn ornaments seemed to have turned around, but quickly shook his head. It was probably just his imagination. His hand fell back down to his side, but his eyes stayed down on the walkway as he spoke up. "Hey, um, what are you doing right now?"

"Nice jacket- or are you wearing belts _weaved_ into a jacket shape like illusion?" Zim reached over and fiddled with a buckle rather curiously. "I like it. It is neat." He gave a small tug on another buckle, a poke to the one near it before stepping back. "Right this second-second? I am standing at my door scheming of ways to get that jacket off of you and onto me. I'm thinking more a-- plan of seduction. Zim runs his hands over your special places, you get hotter, disrobe. I then nab the jacket, run cackling into my house slamming and locking up and pulling up my high grade security system." Zim's grin went wry. "Satisfactory response? Or were you going for something more in the way of: 'ohhh, nothing.'?"

Dib's mouth hung open for a few moments as his eyes snapped back up to Zim. A blush had come to his cheeks that he couldn't hide, but wasn't really trying to as he stared at the other teen before he finally got a hold of himself. A small smirk came to his lips as he closed his mouth and he shrugged. "Well, more along the lines of the second answer, yes, but if you really want to steal away my coat and hide away, I can't help that." He placed his hands in his pockets and tilted his head as his expression became more amused. "Too bad, though. I was looking forward to taking you out."

Zim blinked at that, perking instantly at the last few words. "Out?" he echoed. "Out where?" He pointed down "Out here?" He pointed past Dib. "Out there?" He pointed randomly to the right. "Or out over there?"

Dib gave a small laugh and shook his head. "No, Zim. I mean out on a date." His amusement slowly faded and he became nervous once more as he went on. "Sort of like we did after Skool that one time, but some place different. On a real, actual date." He raised a brow as he looked at the other. "You still want to, right? You're still okay with it? I mean, you seemed pretty excited about it when we talked about it before."

Zim suddenly lunged at Dib without warning, tackling into him as he threw his arms to cling around the boy's neck. "Take me! Take me! Take me! Take me! Take me! Take me out!"

Dib hadn't been expecting such a sudden reaction, so with it he almost fell to the ground, but caught his footing at the last second. His arms snaked around Zim's waist to hold the teen as the nervous feelings from earlier went away with the response he got. "Alright, alright, I will." He moved his arms up to try his best to release Zim from his neck, pulling the teen away from him inch by inch. "We can leave now if you want. Unless there's anything you need to do before we go, or you want to wear something else. Although, I'm not complaining." He gave a small smile at that.

"Zim is good." The green teen glanced back at the open door and snapped his fingers. Instantly the little green dog skittered over and shut it for him. Zim looked back to Dib. "Where are we going this time? Don't say we're walking there. These boots are comfy inside, but walking is _so_ not classy up to date." Zim shook his head, looking to find no form of any vehicle. He gave Dib an unimpressed look, already knowing the answer.

Dib had jumped back a bit when he caught sight of the dog, but as soon as the door was closed and he found it to be safe he turned his attention back to Zim. "Well, um...I can't start learning how to drive until later this year, maybe even not until next. So, it pretty much means we're walking." He looked away, not wanting to see the look he knew he would get for such an answer. "I'll be taking you out to a dance club that's around, an arcade too. So, you'll have fun in place of all the walking. At least I hope so."

"That is… if you've made progress with project SOUP." Zim turned, walking backwards so he could look at the other. "How is your SOUP coming along anyway?" He tilted his head so he could look upon Dib with both eyes seen. "Is it tasty?"

A small frown came to Dib's lips at the question, and as he slowly started to walk after Zim, he spoke up with his eyes averted. "I've been trying to dig up as much as I can, but I don't know. Everything I see just seems to just add up to nothing. There are different things happening in the world, yes, but none of it seems like anything that would add up to the end of the world." He turned his eyes back to Zim and narrowed them just a bit. "Are you sure there's nothing else you can tell me? There has to be some other things, you know. Anything at all."

Zim hopped over his little fence, tugging his skirt back down when he landed. Not that it mattered - he was wearing pants underneath anyway. He turned back around with a sly sort of smile, knitting his fingers behind his back. "I might. Maybe."

Those words had Dib letting out a relieved sigh, but at the same time the teasing sort of way they were spoken set him back on edge. "Well, if you know anything else, then you should obviously tell me." He walked past the fence, seeing no need to jump over it like Zim had when it was so easy to go through it. "I'm supposed to do something about all of this, right? If so then I need to know everything I can. So, tell me."

"Ask the right questions and you'll get the right answers." Zim then wagged a finger. "Ask the wrong questions and you'll never be learning how to drive." He chuckled; humans, such follies. "But in return for this vital information, I want payment." He shrugged loosely, raising his hands. "For information of my own or... stuff." Zim was grinning again. "This magical gift of future seeing isn't for free you know."

"You're unbelievable." The words were almost let out as a sigh, but not in any sort of annoyance. Dib gazed at Zim for a few moments longer as he thought over the words and soon shrugged his shoulders. "Fine, if that's how it has to be." One of his hands moved up to toy with a buckle on his coat. "How about this?" He pulled at the leather just a bit to show what he meant. "You wanted to steal it away earlier." He grinned a bit. "If I let you wear this will you tell me what I want to know?"

"Yes!" Zim thrust out his hands making gimmie-gimmie fingers. Then he paused, realizing just how easily he'd been won over. "Er- I mean... Sure. Why not. The information is FAR more valuable than a smelly Dib coat. But, I suppose it is good enough. Now gimmie!" He stretched out his hands again gesturing for Dib to fork it over.

Dib shook his head, amused at the way Zim acted over the coat. He didn't really mind giving Zim the large piece of clothing, and was soon taking it off to hand it over to the shorter teen, hoping it wouldn't swallow him whole. "There, now give me some answers. There are some things I really need to know." Since his arms were suddenly bare, he moved his hands up to rub at them. The gloves he wore helping just a bit.

Zim squealed happily when he got what he wanted. He pulled it on, and it was much too big for his small thin frame, but he didn't seem to mind. He hugged it happily, fingers barely poking from the long sleeves, petting buckles and belts and fabric alike. "Mmmm. Mine." Zim pulled the coat up onto his head, cozy and happy in the large coat. After a moment of relishing his spoils Zim finally spoke up again. "Fine. Go ahead, ask, but be specific not general, no vague or broad questions like 'what's going to happen?' " He rubbed the sleeves of the coat, cuddling it. "Isn't that right my little smeetys? That's right. Uh-huh. Eee."

Dib frowned at the rules. There went the first question and his easy way out of things. As he kept his eyes on Zim and the way the other teen was acting, he really couldn't stay so upset. Instead, he tried to think of any other small question in place as they kept walking. "Well, why is this suddenly happening? I mean, is there one certain person that wants to do this or, is it just a natural disaster that will cause it?"

Zim made a chastising noise. "That's technically THREE questions in one. And how will a 'why' question help you figure out the 'how' in stopping this. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. But the last two- they both get a yes. 'Yes and No' questions. Those are good. Stick with those." Zim then pre-occupied himself with snooping over the jacket, mainly the pockets for what could be hidden inside. So many things to play around with, to tug, unzip, pull, unbuckle; quite enjoyable, the human fashion.

There was really nothing interesting in most of the pockets. Extra small studs, a guitar pick, and some pocket change. Dib watched as Zim snooped through it all, not really protesting to any of it. "Both are a yes?" He narrowed his eyes a bit at that one fact. To him, it didn't make much sense, but he didn't want to ruin his chance at getting as much information as he could. "Is this person someone that's been mentioned anywhere before?" If so it would be a whole lot easier for Dib to figure some things out.

Zim pulled the jacket to rest properly on his shoulders, pulling it nice, neat and straight. Swiftly he turned, the bottom of the heavy trench coat flaring out behind lithe legs. A sharp gloved finger was pointed Dib's way. "Yes." But not where Dib was thinking; and that was the ultimate crime. Zim's grin tweaked at one corner.

The answer left Dib relieved. It meant information would come quicker, but at the same time he would have to get a name out of Zim as well. With only yes or no questions, he wouldn't be doing that any time soon. "Alright then. Has this person been known for causing other such disasters?" He shook his head at the question and tried again. "Obviously not ending the world, because we're all still here, but other things that could get the person in just as much trouble?"

"Yep!" Zim instantly responded, though now he was digging through the pockets on the inside. There was things of less worth in those pockets as well; receipt, wrappers. "Ohhhh. Look what I found!" That gloved hand reached from inside to produce a candy sucker held between the points of two claws. "This jacket comes with a snack bar." Zim sniffed it. "I wonder if it's safe to consume. Who knows how long it's been in there for... under what conditions."

Dib reached out and grabbed the sucker from Zim's hand, shrugging his shoulders as he looked it over. "It's not that old. Maybe only a month." He moved his free hand up to take the wrapper off and pocket it while he moved the sucker between his lips, licking at it a few times before bringing it back out. "Still tastes good too." He turned his eyes back to Zim and waved the piece of candy at the teen. "You still owe me some answers."

"You stole Zim's sucker you jerk fiend!" Zim tried to snatch the candy back. "That was in Zim's pocket! So that makes it Zim's property! Give give give-- wait... a month old? Eww." He wrinkled his 'nose'. "Why would you store candy for a month in your jacket?" Zim huffed and waved a hand. "Better your jacket than inside your boot, I suppose. Less… sweaty."

Dib blinked his eyes at Zim's reaction before turning them back to the sucker he held. "It tastes perfectly fine." Just to prove his point, Dib moved the sucker back inside his mouth and licked at the piece of candy once more. Even as he pulled it back he gave it one last long lick. "Tastes just like a regular sucker. Besides, I didn't mean to leave it in there. I just sort of forgot about it." He held it out towards Zim, moving his fingers down the stick a bit for the other to take. "Try it."

Zim looked the candy over rather skeptically. It didn't look all that safe - kind of sticky and not all that tasty. He poked at it and made a face. "... It's... got your saliva all over it." He stuck out his tongue in brief disgust. This coming from the boy who two days ago spent most of his time with his tongue in Dib's mouth. "What if it... burns?" Zim flicked his eyes up to Dib. "Or stings?... or shoots lasers in my mouth... at my tongue?"

Dib rolled his eyes at Zim's questions. "How many times have you dealt with my saliva so far?" He reached out and grabbed one of the other teen's hands despite the sleeve that it was buried in. When he had hold of it he placed the sucker in Zim's own and pulled both of his own hands away, letting them fall back down. "Just try it. If it hurts then just take it out really quick. You were able to tell right away when you touched my tongue when I stung you, right? It should be the same way if you lick that. Just give it a small taste."

"Zim lecked yer tongue when we firth met." Zim grunted and pulled the sucker from his mouth. "So if it stings, why keep sticking bad things in my mouth." He licked his lips and tasted the inside of his mouth. "M. Hot and sticky." He blinked a few times. "Mine now." Zim turned abruptly, shoving the sucker in his mouth and continued to walk on.

Dib pouted at having the piece of candy taken away from him. "Hey!" He hurried his steps so he was walking beside Zim and looked to the side at the other teen as he walked. "Can't we share it? You don't have to automatically make everything I hand to you your own." His frown deepened. "I still want some of it. I was the one that bought it."

"No. Yes. And no." Zim happily licked the candy with his thin tongue, curling it around, dragging it against the sticky candy before slipping his tongue back in his mouth. "Mmmm. So good, and not Dib's." He popped the sucker back in his mouth before looking over at Dib. "Din't you have queshions?" He raised a brow. "SOUP?" Slowly he dragged the sucker in and out, pressing lips against it only to suck it back in, curling a tongue near the base of the candy; waiting for Dib's answer.

Dib watched the small display for a few moments, not able to take his eyes off of it until he realized that he was being asked an important question. With that, he quickly shook his head and looked back ahead. "Y-Yeah, I do." One of his fingers tapped against his arm as he tried to think and not become distracted. "Is there any sort of thing the person specializes in? I mean, if it's going to be a national disaster then something has to be able to cause it, if it's man made." He glanced to the side at Zim. "At least I would think so."

Dib caught the other lashing his tongue around the sucker before he began sucking the very top. Zim glanced over when he noticed Dib looking at him. "Hm? No. No, it isn't man made." Green lips pulled back and he held the sticky candy between his teeth a moment, the grin was much too wicked. Irken made, not man; that indeed was far too wicked.

Dib almost didn't catch the words, too busy stuck in his own mind and the thoughts he had which involved that tongue and small simple sucker. "H-Huh? What?" His eyes narrowed when he actually processed what he had been told and he looked back ahead. "Well, then why did you tell me someone was involved? If it's not man made, you shouldn't have said yes to someone having anything to do with it. You should have just said it was a natural disaster." He watched a car pass by on the street and waited until the blinding lights were completely gone before he spoke up again. "Besides, if it's not man made what else could it be?" They weren't yes or no questions, but he was becoming desperate.

Zim pulled the sucker from his mouth and pointed one way. "At the very beginning, Zim said 'yes' there is a certain person" he pointed the sucker the other way "and 'yes' it is a natural disaster. How you process the information given isn't Zim's fault. I told you to be specific. You can't rule out anything, Dib-pierce." Zim slowly shook his head. "And you only have one day left." He sighed, looking ahead. "I will miss this planet, and all it's exciting idiosyncrasies." He slipped the sucker back into his mouth, sucking on it a moment before he pulled out to talk, looking at Dib. "And you."

Dib looked back at Zim at the last two words. They had him giving the other teen a sad smile before he looked ahead once more and tried his best to think over what he had been told. "Alright then. So, someone is still behind it all. If they didn't make whatever they will be using with their bare hands does that mean there is somewhere they will be getting whatever tools they need to make this happen?" He looked back at Zim with a small curious expression. "Maybe somewhere I will be able to check out?"

The last question had Zim pausing his suck on the candy. That was a very good question. A little too good a question. Zim gave a small sort of grin around the sucker and he stopped walking. He pulled the sucker from his mouth with a wet pop. "Hey Dib-pet, wanna lick?" He pointed the sucker in Dib's direction but tugged it away when the boy tried to lean over and lick. Zim gave a cackle and popped it back in his mouth. "Too bad, too slow."

Dib huffed a bit at the teasing, but his bad mood didn't stay for long. A small smirk came to his lips, and once more he leaned over to snake an arm around Zim's shoulders, pulling the teen closer to his own body, tugging on the coat as he did so. His free hand moved up to place it on Zim's own that held the sucker and pulled, bringing the treat out of the other's mouth just enough so he could lean in and have a lick at it while pressing a bit of his tongue to Zim's lips at the same time. His piercing clacked against the hard candy during the process, but he didn't seem bothered by it.

A thin striped tongue slunk out to join the other, licking candy and tongue alike; Zim wasn't one for hesitation or inhibitions, it seemed. Dib's tongue was hot, but the candy was sticky sweet, a rather tangy combination that Zim rather enjoyed sliding his tongue across. Though he was torn which he wanted to curl his tongue around more - the tongue stud or the candy itself. Zim let out a throaty sound, a mix between a moan and frustration. He reached up and grasped the collar of Dib's shirt pulling the boy down, closer, needing to taste the sticky sweet on lips, teeth, and the hotter taste inside Dib's mouth.

Dib was easily pulled near, won over by the thin tongue that had moved across his own. His attention was no longer on the sucker as he let his tongue curl around Zim's, just barely grazing the round piece of candy. He sucked at the thin appendage for only a few moments more and took his own tongue back to lick at the forgotten sucker one last time before he moved back to suck at Zim's bottom lip, his flavored tongue licking at the skin he was sucking between his teeth.

Zim's thin tongue ran across Dib's top lip before the sucker slipped back into his mouth. His free hand left Dib's shirt to run through the boy's dark hair, grabbing a fist full to yank the boy's head up, taking advantage of the moment when Dib opened his mouth to let a pained noise to press his own, pushing tongue and candy in. Though Zim only wanted the stud for his own, curling his tongue around it to pull it into his own mouth, to clink it against his own teeth and suck the sweet of it.

Dib tried to let out a groan, but it was much too muffled against Zim's lips as the sensitive stud was toyed with. His hand that was still around Zim's shoulders moved up towards the teen's hair and fiddled with the dark strands, despite the gloves he wore. Inch by inch, they moved to the small spots that Zim seemed to enjoy having pet and rubbed gently. His tongue tried to free itself of Zim's own to move around and lick at the candy, but at the same time he didn't want to break what kind of contact the other had in the kiss.

Zim whined, the fingers atop his head causing him to melt forward against Dib. His hand fell from the other's hair, wrapping round to cling at the back of Dib's shirt, dragging down to grasp at the boy's rear, just wanting him unhealthily close. Zim pulled back enough to drink in a ragged breath, lapping at the sucker, lips, what he could of Dib's tongue and the piercing, while trying to catch his breath.

Dib took in a shaky breath of his own, but didn't stop his attention on Zim's lips just as Zim wouldn't allow him the same pleasure. The hand on his body was more than enough encouragement for him to do as he pleased. His one hand continued to move just a bit harder through hair as Dib slowly trailed kisses down Zim's jaw and towards his neck once he had freed his lips. As he moved his head he opened his eyes a bit and realized that at some point they had stopped walking completely and were standing near a crosswalk. None of it really mattered to him, but he couldn't help smirking a bit against Zim's skin at a few cars that seemed to slow down more than normal as they drove past.

Zim let out a small noise. Now his face and neck were sticky, though at the moment, he didn't seem to care. Though he did idly notice he still had a hold of the sucker, with his own hand. Popping it into his mouth he reached up and removed Dib's hand from the top of his head, placing it down on his hip; hmm, maybe a little lower. He let out a very throat laugh, leaning closer against Dib, draping his other hand over the boy's shoulder, keeping the other exactly where it was. "Do all 'dates' start out like this around here?"

Dib leaned back up, but refused to let go of Zim at all. "I'm not really sure. Maybe, maybe not, but I'm glad this one does." His fingers idly stroked Zim's side as he waited for them to be allowed to cross the street. It didn't really take long for the light to change, and soon he was once more walking along while still clinging to the shorter teen. "I'll take it as you're enjoying yourself so far?"

"It is a ritual Zim could learn to get used to." Zim slipped his arms more comfortably around Dib's middle as they continued to walk. He thoroughly licked his lips over, removing the excess sticky texture. "Very quickly." He snuck a hand into Dib's butt pocket. "Your add-libbing skills are most impressive, Dib-pet." Zim mused; and his attention was easily detoured by candies.

"Anything to impress you, I suppose." Dib gave a small smile at his own words, but it quickly fell away as he thought over what Zim said. "I really hope you _can_ get used to it, though. I want to be able to take you out a lot. As many times as you want, but I'm really worried." His hand at Zim's side moved under the clothing so it could touch skin as he continued to speak. "I've figured out a few things from these questions, but I don't know if it's nearly enough."

"A lot." Zim echoed more to himself, resting his head against Dib's side; subdued by the touch on his skin, though he really shouldn't, have considering 'real' wasn't suppose to be real. "What have you figured?" He glanced up to the other.

Dib looked around as he started to answer, not wanting to miss the club they were supposed to be going to. "Well, it may just be one person and you said they have specialized in things that could cause them to be in really big trouble. I just need to look up some people that could cause such havoc. It's a long shot, but it's something at least." He spotted the club further down and gave a relieved sigh that they hadn't passed it. "As for the natural disaster part. I need to look up what kinds can be easily created by people because some may not be possible." With a few more steps he stopped them and turned to face Zim while in front of the club. A brick building that looked a bit normal compared to all the flashy neon signs of other buildings around it. "And you never answered my last question."

Zim stared up at Dib blankly, pulling the sucker out to give it slow thorough licks with his sleek tongue. "What question?" A slow mischievous grin spread over his lips as he slid his tongue across them, curling it at the corner of his lips before it slid back into his mouth with a smack of lips. "I don't remember anything..." Zim pushed himself on tiptoes, leaning back against Dib. "But this..." He slid his tongue across Dib's lips next, sliding the sucker back in Dib's mouth before he stepped back from the boy, clacking back down on his flat feet with an interested half lidded gaze.

Dib couldn't help the noise that escaped him at Zim's display and sudden attention. The sucker in his mouth stopped any words that were about to leave him and he narrowed his eyes at Zim for just a moment as he took it out. "You are a complete tease." He shook his head after he said the words and turned to face the club that was in front of them, walking towards the door and opening it for Zim. "After you." When the words left him, Dib quickly looked back to the door as if afraid another purple blur would shoot out much like at Skool.

Zim seemed to have the same thought on his mind, and he peered first inside just to make sure he wouldn't get mowed over like last time. But Zim couldn't see much of anything save for coloured lights inside, no zooming Zita's. So Zim walked inside, though not without nabbing Dib's hand on the way in, yanking the boy inside with him a cackle.

Dib let go of the door quickly when he was pulled in, and popped the sucker back in his mouth so he wouldn't drop it. He also needed his hands free so he could pay the fee for both of them to get in, and had to stop Zim halfway thru so he could pay up and not get kicked out on trying to get in free. Once that was done, he was the one dragging them further into the club. There were a few lights flickering, and the music blasting from the speakers was something horrendously goth. Few people were actually dancing, most were sitting or even standing and one or two even looked Dib's way.

Zim looked around the scene. The room was almost completely dark. Had it not been for the strobe lights, the outlines of many guests lurking in the shadows wouldn't have been seen. Everyone seemed completely stoic despite the music with the singer who enthusiastically screamed how much his life sucked and how everyone and himself should die horrible deaths of excruciating suicides (except his dog Muffins). "Hey... um." Zim tugged on Dib's shirt questioningly. "Is... everyone dead and stuffed?" He glanced up at Dib. "Because I can't tell what's prop and who's a paying customer."

Dib pulled the sucker from his mouth and shook his head at Zim's question. "There are no stuffed people in here. People are just a little more reserved in this place." He looked around and spotted a small table they could sit at which he took no time at pulling Zim towards. "No one really jumps around or all of that other nonsense here. People keep mostly to themselves and just listen to the music." He looked towards the stage after they sat down and shrugged his shoulders. "I don't come here that often, so, it's hard for me to pick out any sort of crowd."

Zim stood by the table, not all that enthused to pay for sitting, he could do that liberally at home and with much more world-conquering productivity. He scanned the other tables, noting all the other people there who sat on their lonesome, writing in the horridly dull light. He pointed to a particularly dark pathetic soul. "Look Dib! You two have so much in common!" He gave a wry grin and patted Dib on the shoulder. "Go make friends! You two could exchange badly written recipes or... whatever stupid things you write about."

Dib looked over at the one random person Zim had pointed to then back to the shorter teen. "You can't be serious." He blinked his eyes. "Since when do I attempt to make friends?" He rested his head on one of his hands as he twirled the sucker in his other. "Besides, I'm here with you, remember? Wouldn't it seem a little weird if I was talking with someone else on a date?" It took him a couple of moments, but finally his eyes narrowed as his attention was back on Zim. "And what I write about isn't stupid. We've been over this before."

"Well as exciting as Zim's butt is, and the joys that come with sitting on it, if _you_ won't do something, _I_ will. And if that means talking to strange men with glue white faces and marker drawn on eyes- then I accept the challenge!" Zim gave a slight shrug. "And I've seen better scrawling on the bathroom stall walls. At least they have a better feel for pros." He gave a wide grin, a wave and headed over to the other table to pester the strange gothic man.

Dib narrowed his eyes some about to protest, but decided against it. Instead, he kept his eyes on Zim and what he was up to. Usually, most of the people in the club were just about as sociable as he had been when he was in Skool, but he could have been wrong for as long as he was around the place. That thought had him watching much too closely as he gripped the sucker tighter in his hand.

Zim didn't hold any inhibitions, slamming his hands down on the table and saying something to the person there writing, peering over at what it was exactly. The other person looked rather startled, not expecting someone to approach him, especially not in this place. Zim continued to go on about something - it couldn't be heard since it was so far away, and the music was so loud, even Zim's boisterous voice couldn't be heard above it. The goth seemed rather put off by the forwardness, but when Zim started to take interest in what he was writing, he seemed to actually lighten up. Zim pointed to something in the book, tapping it a few times, and the goth actually cracked a smile.

The whole scene playing out caused Dib's good mood from earlier to take a sudden turn. Nothing Zim ever said about his own writing ever made him smile. The only interest Zim took in it was to make fun of it and that fact caused Dib to become even more bitter over the situation. The stick in his hand was becoming bent by his grip, but he didn't even realize it, nor did he care as he tried to kill the goth with his eyes.

But of course, the goth took no notice, used to murderous stares of other sorts, and people here were always giving such stares. The goth made some kind of comment which caused Zim to blink and suddenly laugh. The green boy brandished a wide toothy grin that was completely of his extroverted personality. He reached a claw up running it through his thick bangs to lift it up and look at the other with both eyes in sight. Then the goth really began to smile.

Dib tapped his nails hard against the surface of the table in an attempt to calm himself down, but it just wasn't working. Watching Zim show himself off to the pale guy across from him was causing Dib to want to get up from his seat and punch the goth in the face. It probably wouldn't have been a good idea, though. Goth or not, Dib obviously sucked at fighting. He stuck the sucker back in his mouth and bit down hard on the candy causing it to break as he continued to glare at the two.

Zim opened his mouth to slip out his tongue, curling it and pointing to it to which the other suddenly became really interested, saying something indistinguishable. He stuck out his tongue which was laced with many piercings of all sorts as well as Dib could see. Zim's eyes widened and his grin to grow, and he licked his lips over, curling it at the corner of his lips as he looked over the other's tongue. He raised a curious hand to poke at one, leaning in far too close to look see.

Dib's eyes widened for just a quick second at what he saw before the jealousy came back worse than before. Zim wasn't supposed to be interested in someone else's tongue. Something about that just rubbed him the wrong way. The more he watched the angrier he got. The way Zim seem so interested in each small stud finally caused Dib to throw the empty stick he had been chewing aside, and get up from the chair. The walk was quick and he was soon grabbing onto Zim's hand beneath the coat as he narrowed his eyes. "Come on, Zim."

The green boy stood his ground, unmoved, in all meaning of the word. "Come on, Zim? Buy him at least dinner first." Zim scowled Dib's way. "Just cuz you won't make friends, doesn't mean Zim can't." He narrowed his eyes some, unimpressed. "You looked pretty entertained on your butt anyway." Zim then smiled a little wryly.

The goth, on the other hand was looking from one to the other, he'd never been in a situation like this before; not with people, anyway.

Dib scowled at the response he got and looked back and forth between the two of them. His gaze was a bit more hateful towards the goth, though. When it settled back on Zim, he spoke up with a bit of annoyance. "Fine, if I buy you some food will you come back to the table? Bringing you out on a date means the two of us." He turned his narrowed eyes back on the other across from them. "Not someone else."

Zim blinked, letting his hair fall back down. "Did you just bribe Zim with food?"

"You two are _together_ together?" the goth pointed from one to the other in surprise; and what was suppose to be hidden disappointment, which wasn't.

Zim turned to give a wide grin to the other, putting his free hand on hip which was consumed by the large coat sleeve. "Yep! Unfortunately." He squeezed Dib's hand. "I keep him because he kisses good." He glanced narrowed eyes at Dib with sly amusement.

The words caused Dib to have an idea, and a small grin came to his face whether Zim was being playful or not. His one hand squeezed Zim's back in response as he shrugged his shoulders. "Is that the only reason?" He moved closer to the shorter teen. "It's not because I'm good at knowing just where to touch?" His free hand moved up towards Zim's head to rub the spot that the other teen seemed to love for him to pay attention to. "And it's not because I'm good at knowing just where to lick?" He dipped his head down to press his tongue against the curve of Zim's neck, making sure the metal stuff moved along the skin. "Hmm?"

Zim went liquid, leaning back against Dib's front, though arching with a sound that really shouldn't have been heard outside a bedroom; giving his audience something to really stare at. His grin went wicked, tilting his head to the side to give Dib more neck to play at. His free hand stole Dib's other, bringing it with his other hand still in Dib's, on his hips, sliding the other teen's hands down in encouragement to roam where they pleased. Zim gave a sharp giggle that was more a cackle in the end. "You should do all of that, but naked." Zim shifted his heavy lidded gaze on the goth, the grin never leaving. "He never does though."

The goth just stared.

Dib moved his hands as low as he could, considering the restraint of a certain skirt. He moved his tongue away from Zim's skin for only a quick moment so he could speak. "I would if you really wanted me too. Any time, just say the words and I'll lick you in all the right spots, naked." He ran his tongue all the way up to where Zim's ear should have been and moved his fingers slowly inside the thin material of the skirt.

" 'The word'." Zim instantly spoke up, looking from the goth to Dib. He raised a hand to fiddle with the many earrings at Dib's ear, smirking but serious, though more entertained if Dib would follow through on his word right then, right there.

Dib gave a small noise as Zim played with his ear and as Zim spoke up it had him grinning against the teen's skin. The coat which he had let Zim borrow, was yanked off and tossed on the table when Dib had moved his hands back up. The entire time he refused to move his lips away from Zim's neck, biting down in some areas. When the coat was gone, he moved his hands towards his own body and pulled at the strings on his shirt, letting the ties come loose little by little until the shirt was barely hanging on. "Anything for you." After the small words were said he sucked at a small bit of skin near Zim's shoulder before biting down roughly.

Zim let out a pleased squeak that melted out into an even more pleased moan. "You should say that- mmm-when you're naked naked. Not pretending naked. Like- no shirt and pants naked." He turned and slid a hand down Dib's front to play with the piercing at the boy's belly button. "On your knees, like a good Dib-pet." Zim slid his tongue across Dib's tongue, curling it at the corner of Dib's lips. "And if you beg like a good boy, maybe I'll let you lick _under_ the skirt."

The words had Dib pulling back just a bit from Zim's lips, but not before giving that tongue one last lick. "That's how you want it, hmm?" He moved completely away from Zim so he could take his shirt the rest of the way off. It wasn't uncomfortable to do such a thing, since his clothes barely covered him up half the time, anyway. Besides, some of the men in the club weren't even wearing a shirt so, it wasn't like he was out of the ordinary. The piece of clothing joined his coat and one hand was soon moving to his jeans while he leaned in to press a kiss to Zim's lips. His free hand pushed Zim's hair aside so both eyes were shown as he did so.

"Mm. Dib's mouth still tastes like candy." Zim pressed his lips harder to Dib's, slipping his tongue in to taste the other's, though through half lidded eyes he glanced at the still gawking goth; it was probably the most excitement the poor lonely soul had ever had in, well, his lifetime. Zim seemed to be good with the introverted ones. When he pulled back from Dib's mouth, lapping a few times at the tongue that chased his out, he was quite out of breath, though he surveyed the naked chest before him; humans were so odd looking underneath, too much unnecessary under clothes. But that didn't stop Zim from running claws across the pale skin, dragging his fingers across curiously, enjoying the tracks he could leave if he pressed hard enough into flesh. "Maybe... he wants to lick Zim too?" Zim gestured back to the other sitting voyeuristically at the table with his shoulder. "Two pierced tongues licking Zim, are better than one. Though... only the Dib would get the naughtiest." Zim slowly drew a sharp finger up Dib's front.

The hands on his chest caused Dib to let out tiny little sounds. At Zim's suggestion, he quickly quieted and narrowed his eyes. His free hand moved down to run nails along the shorter teen's hip as he pulled the body closer. "No way." The words were hissed near the side of Zim's head. His other hand had already undone his jeans, so it easily slid back up to move under Zim's shirt, running nails at the skin there as well. "You're mine." He leaned back and moved his tongue out to tease Zim's lips with the stud before he trailed it down the teen's chin, stopping just to suck at the skin there.

Zim smirked at the possessiveness, though the denying of his suggestion didn't put a damper on his mood. "I think you have it confused, Dib-pet." Sharp fingers drew across skin, down to the waist of Dib's pants, slipping a few fingers below the waistline. Zim pressed nearer to the other, arching so they were chest to chest, but on tip toes to hiss against Dib's ear "You're _Zim's_." Claws pushed down Dib's pants from his hips while a serpentine tongue slipped out to run against ear piercings with a heated little moan. "So learn to share."

Dib gave his own loud moan at all the attention which soon turned to a whine at Zim's words. He trailed small kisses down Zim's neck, stopping just when he reached the teen's throat, so he could speak. "I don't want to share. Why should anyone else have you?" He glanced at the goth out the corner of his eyes and his expression became hateful for a split second before he turned he attention back on Zim. Both of his hands slid down to the skirt at the teen's hips and tried to slip inside, trying to touch as much of the skin as he could.

"Jealousy has you standing here, thoroughly feeling over Zim in front of a lonely stranger" Zim's eyes flicked shamelessly down then back up "naked, in a dark club full of sad people that don't dance." Zim let out a noise, pressing just that much closer along Dib's chest, not minding the other's roaming hands at all. "Bad for you, good for Zim. Because I have no humility." Claws had no barrier or limitations as they drew lower across Dib's skin. "So why are you still standing, and not on your knees begging Zim, Dib-pet?"

The fingers that went lower caused Dib to let out a small noise. When Zim spoke, he blinked his eyes and tried to gain some control, but it wasn't working. Instead of becoming upset of the other's words, he only grinned. His hands at Zim's hips moved up once more to push up the teen's shirt as Dib moved down to his knees. Once he was settled and Zim's stomach was exposed, he moved forward and pressed his tongue to the green skin. He gave it a few licks before he raised his eyes up to the other. "Please, let me lick every inch of you." His words were husky and after them he went right back to licking the skin in front of him, trailing down to hips.

Someone cleared their throat. "As much as I love watching t-this sexy exhibition. You two are g-going to get kicked out if you keep doing it." The goth pointed out with a frown that was accustomed to his face.

"Ohh." Zim practically purred the sound out, running claws through Dib's hair, flicking the piercing in the pointed lock of hair before playing with Dib's brow piercing. "Hear that, Dib-pet? I think that's jealousy talking. Maybe if he licked Zim too, he'd be just as happy as you." He arched towards the tongue, tugging his shirt up higher to expose more green skin to be licked.

Such a thing only caused Dib to pull Zim closer while giving a small whine. Since Zim was pushing his own shirt up it, allowed Dib to move his hands to the teen's hips and slip the skirt lower off of the skin. His tongue followed as the piece of clothing moved away. Each bit of skin that was exposed, Dib pressed his tongue to, moving dangerously low.

"I rather like this 'real dating' thing. If it means you'll go on knees naked to lick Zim everywhere and anywhere." Zim gave up the efforts of holding up his own shirt in favor of burying his fingers in Dib's hair. He shut his eyes, letting little squeamy noises, squirming with a moan after when Dib's tongue licked a sensitive ticklish spot of skin. It was weird to feel one tongue against his skin, as dedicated as it was to licking every intimate spot. Zim's skin prickled and the sharp realization of what exactly he was doing with an alien species hit him harder than a slap in the face. His eyes snapped open to look at Dib's thirsty tongue. Not only was this immoral, this was alien beastiality (kind of). Zim groaned, but it wasn't heated like before, it was aggravation mixed with disappointment and disgust.

Dib's hands caught on Zim's pants just as he was pulling the skirt down lower, but the noise Zim made stopped him going any farther. It wasn't like the noises he heard before and caused Dib to give a small frown as he licked Zim's skin one last time. He bit the skin rather roughly before he pulled his head back just a bit to look up at the other's face with narrowed eyes, wondering what could have brought on such a change. "What's wrong?" Even after the question left him, Dib still couldn't keep his hands still. His fingers moved over the slick green skin where his tongue had once been.

Zim had bit his knuckle, to keep sounds in, the pain grounded him though his thinking didn't get anymore clear. He looked down at Dib, who almost a week ago didn't want anything to do with touch, now had no inhibitions about going down on him, naked as can be for everyone to watch with shifty hands in their pockets. "Aren't-... aren't you cold?" Zim smirked a little at the only lame phrase he could think of to say.

"Well… he certainly seems _h-happy_ about it." Their on watcher goth pointed to Dib. "..Lucky jerk." he murmured to himself.

Dib couldn't help the grin that came to his face when he heard what the goth said. His eyes stayed on Zim, though, and he slowly shook his head. He let his hands slowly slide up Zim's sides as he leaned forward to moved his tongue up the teen's stomach before he pulled away seconds after to speak. "I'm perfectly fine." His grin grew against the green skin. "Pretty hot actually."

"He's going to put an eye out if h-he enjoys it anymore than he is." the goth commented off handedly, shifting in his seat.

Zim bit the end of a claw, knowing he shouldn't be thinking what ran through his mind; those kind of thoughts would get him banished, or horridly black marked by his beloved Empire. Unfortunately, play over work seemed to be winning, despite the consequence; and Zim didn't feel all that ashamed to be dabbling at all. "Well then, you're missing good parts of Zim to lick up here." Zim pointed up. "You'll get your 'every inch'.. soon enough." His promised in a low carressive tone.

"ZIM!" That wasn't the goth, that wasn't Dib, that was a girl's voice; a rather familiar girl's voice. "Hi! I um, I guess I should have expected to find you here." Zita hurried over to the little gathering, though she didn't see _everyone_. "Where's Dib? I thought he'd be with you, here. I heard he sometimes comes here. And- um… AH!" Zita jerked back, noticing movement at Zim's feet which startled her. She blinked her eyes wide when she caught what it really was in a passing strobe light. Her face was coloured in warmth. "O-ohh. Hi Dib." She gave the smallest of unsure waves. "I see you're feeling better. Um."

That voice instantly caused Dib to tense up. He had hoped Zita wouldn't see him, but his hopes were crushed, and he wondered if he should just ignore the girl or continue with what he was doing. Of course, sitting naked on his knees while trying to have a conversation didn't seem like a good idea. "Well, I was." The words came out a little annoyed as he moved to stand up, his hands pulling his pants and such back up as he did. He took a few seconds to bother with the zipper and such before he turned to face the girl, deciding to keep his shirt off. "What are you doing in a place like this, Zita?" His arms slipped around Zim's waist after he spoke and his fingers idly stroked the skin that was still exposed.

"Well now I'm disappointed." Zim huffed, crossing his arms and looking away from Dib, miffed that his fun had been cut short and half clothed.

"Me too." The goth sighed.

"Me three." Zita's eyes grew wider as she shook her head. "I mean- no- that's not what I meant. What I- I um. I was just- passing by." She nodded, biting at a fingernail nervously. "And saw Zim, and just... um. I sometimes like the music here."

Dib gave a small smirk at such an answer from everyone that was around. He leaned his head closer to Zim's so he could whisper near the shorter teen's head. "Don't be like that." He sucked at a bit of the green skin for a few seconds until he moved back, but one of his hands still ventured down beneath the skirt. Even as it did he turned his eyes back to Zita and raised a brow. "I thought you hated everything that had to do with..._this_." He made a small gesture with his head to the place around. "At least that was the impression I got."

Zim slapped Dib's hand away from his skirt; seemed special privileges were being revoked.

Zita fidgeted, glancing around as if anyone important from skool might pop up and see her there. She looked back to Dib, biting her nail again. "N-no. I never said that." She lowered her hand down. "I didn't know they did things like... well, whatever it was you were doing" She pointed to the floor and added "down there."

Dib pouted and took his hand back, letting it rest on Zim's hip instead. He turned his attention back to Zita at the girl's words, but didn't seem all that embarrassed by what she said. "I don't really think they do. It was a spur of the moment sort of thing that you caught. That's all." He looked back around and shrugged. "No one really seemed to mind, though, so I guess we're in the clear." He looked behind the girl and narrowed his eyes, feeling as if something was missing. "Are the other two with you?" He really hoped not. He didn't need all three bothering them on their date.

"No!" Zita answered much too quickly. "I mean- no, no Jessica and Alex aren't… here. They don't like this place. 'Too loud, too depressing, too god-awful' they say."

"Tell them the Dib licked me in naughty places while he was naked on his knees!" Zim spoke up, his own blow against Dib for stopping his fun, telling one of three gossip queens of the skool.

"I watched." The goth waved a hand at Zita; he just wanted to be a part of the fun, too.

Dib looked over at the goth, whom he had actually almost forgotten all about. He raised a brow, but shrugged the words off after a few moments as he looked back at Zita. "And you do? It still surprises me, sorry." His lips twitched a bit as he tried to hide a smirk, but his attention was grabbed by Zim.

"Don't tempt her. We already have enough attention around Skool as it is. I'd rather not get my face knocked in again, thanks."

"Oh! Slug went missing." Zita blurted out. "We all thought we was dead when Zim kinda-" she made a smashing motion. "But he was alive. He was sent home from skool. But after that..." She shrugged her shoulders and shook her head. "No ones heard from him since." She bit a nail and looked around, shifty eyed. Leaning forward she cupped a hand beside her mouth to whisper. "The hot gossip: some say it was _aliens_."

Zim randomly looked to the goth "Do _you_ wanna lick Zim? My boyfriend's tongue has gone flaccid."

Dib rolled his eyes at what Zita said. "There's no such thing. Geez, you sound like Mister Dwicky." He squinted one of his eyes. "It wouldn't surprise me if he had been the one to spread such a rumor." Dib turned his attention back to Zim and pulled the shorter teen closer when he no longer had his attention. "Hey now, I'm more than willing to still lick you." To prove his point, Dib leaned down to trail his tongue across Zim's shoulder, moving the shirt aside as he did. "Just like that."

A blush grew on Zita's cheek at such an open display. "Y-you were never like this before, Dib. Before Zim came, you avoided people like the plague. You'd do anything to avoid touching anyone." Her blush grew just that much more. "Let alone lick anyone. It's so weird to watch this. So unreal. Especially that fight between you and Slug. Everyone was talking about you two." She sighed a little. "Jessica and Alex thought it would eventually die away, but you two are still the hottest topic." She pointed, remembering something. "Especially that scene in the hallway. I heard you two just did it right there and then after leaving the class."

Zim laughed lazily; humans were funny. "Yea, we totally did." He waved a limp-wristed hand. "Left our own mark right there on the lockers." He raised a claw to run slowly through Dib's hair, dragging pointed fingers possessively through the dark hair. "If you know what I mean."

Dib grinned at that. "No one really seemed to mind. It's too bad the teacher had to spoil our fun." He gave a lingering kiss to Zim's skin before he raised his head once more to look at the girl across from them. "I still hate everyone at Skool, don't worry. Zim is just really addictive." His hand tried once more to slip down Zim's skirt, wanting to touch the skin beneath it without getting slapped away. "I can't get enough of him." He licked the corner of Zim's lips, just to prove his point.

"... Lucky jerk." came the off-handed comment from the table.

Zim leaned into Dib, moving his hips into the touch. He took the boy's other hand and moved it to his stomach, slipping it up under his shirt encouragingly. His interested grin returned to his lips at the lick.

"Soo, this is just a fling?" Zita pointed to either of them curiously; well there went all the good moods in one foul swoop.

The question caused Dib's hands to clench and stop where they were. For a few moments he stayed as he was, keeping his eyes down, narrowed on the floor below them. It was strange how he used to think of the relationship as a small fling when it had been all pretend, but suddenly it was so real, he didn't like the thought so much. His hands slowly moved away from their spots so he could wrap his arms possessively around Zim's waist, resting his chin on the shorter teen's shoulder as he looked back to Zita. "No, it's not."

Zita was a little surprised by Dib's rather aggressive but assured reaction. "So... what is it then?" Her eyes widened some. "Is it serious?"

Zim looked at anywhere but at Zita; across the room was nice, it meant he didn't have to own up to anything.

Dib opened his mouth about to answer, but closed it just as quickly. He knew how he wanted to answer the girl, but he had suddenly become nervous just as he had been standing in front of Zim's house earlier. He had never been the type to become so nervous, and it was starting to aggravate him. He glanced to the side at Zim, but the other teen seemed to have zoned himself out, and for that he tightened his grip on the other, trying to gain some attention from him as he finally answered Zita. "Yes, it is." He tried to joke around to make the shaky feeling in his stomach go away. "You're going to tell everyone at Skool aren't you?"

Zita shook her head slowly. "No... just Jessica and Alex." That was a confirmed 'yes' if anything.

"On Monday, it won't matter." Zim almost inaudibly spoke. After he glanced at Dib.

That had a confused look from Zita.

Dib looked at Zim, and a frown came to his face. His eyes fell back down to the floor as he was reminded of what exactly he had to do, and just how little faith Zim had in him. He raised his eyes up after a few seconds back to Zita and shook his head, trying to make his expression less worried. "It's nothing." And that was a huge lie.

Zim pulled away from Dib's strong hold around his waist, but he took hold of Dib's hand. He just couldn't stand the sudden somber mood; he wasn't supposed to feel bad about his glorious mission. So he gave Dib's hand a slight tug and gave a half smirk. "Dance with Zim?"

Dib thought about protesting, but he couldn't help stopping and giving a small nod instead. "Sure, alright." Even if he wasn't that good at it, it would help him forget about the current thoughts running through his head. Besides, it was supposed to be a date. No sense in denying Zim what he wanted.

Zim's grin grew and he waved fingers at Zita. "Say hi to Alex and Jessica for me. Zim won't be at skool Monday." That said he tugged Dib to the dance floor.

The goth sighed woefully watching them go, leaning a cheek into his hand. "Bet he tasted really good too."

Zita gave the goth a look. "You're creepy."

Zim had no idea the customary dances of the Earthanites, but from observing what little dancers there were, he supposed the dead could be propped up to dance just as good. He rested his thumbs at Dib's pant waist and stood there, staring at the boy's belly button piercing, as if it would have all the answers. "Do I... sway?" He looked up at Dib, at a loss for how they would synchronize this dancing technique together. "Or... do you?"

Dib had once more zoned out because of Zim's words to Zita, so when he was asked the question it caused him to be a little startled. "Hmm? Well, usually you just move with the music." Of course the music in the club wasn't the best thing to move to, even Dib had to admit that, but he could make it work. "So, you could sway like this." He moved his arms around Zim's waist and moved them both to the music for a few seconds before a grin came to his face. "Or you could do it like this." He stopped them and turned Zim around in his arms so the shorter teen was pressed as close back against his own body as he could get. His hands slid down to Zim's hips and rested there where the skin was still slightly exposed and slowly moved both their bodies together to the music. "Whichever you prefer." He spoke the words near the side of Zim's head.

"This is good." Zim quietly affirmed. "That way Zim can do this." He raised his thin arms up, reaching back to wrap arms around Dib's neck, arching across the boy's front making things just that much closer. He continued to move with Dib to the horrid music, but he found a rhythm he could sway with slinky movement to. Zim turned his head to look at Dib's the best he could. "You're close you know." He scoffed. "No, not like THAT. I mean SOUPing it." He gave a small lick to Dib's chin.

Dib frowned at the subject change, but the small lick helped him feel a little better. "I don't feel any closer." His movements didn't slow even as he kept speaking. "I have answers, but I still feel like I'm right back where I started. I only have one more day, and I'm trying to make the most of everything even while I'm supposed to be working, but I still can't help worrying." He placed a small kiss on the side of Zim's head. "How is any of that considered being any closer?"

Zim gave a soft smirk, toying with the hair near the top of Dib's head. "Most would suicide." His smirk became more wry. "But you're closer to the answer than you know, Dib-pet." He rolled his hips back against Dib, and truly grinned. "Can you feel it?"

Dib let out a low groan and his hands that had settled on Zim's hips tightened a bit to keep the teen where he was. "Well, I'm feeling something, but some how I seriously doubt what I'm feeling is going to stop the end of the world." He gave a small smirk and a quick lick to Zim's skin.

"Hmm, I dunno. Get all my clothes off, you might be surprised." Truer words were never spoken. Zim chuckled a little, his hands moving down to follow Dib's arms down to where his hands rested on his hips.

Even with Zim's hands on his own, Dib tried to push that skirt down once again. "I tried, but we were interrupted." He kissed a small trail up Zim's neck and stopped at the corner of his lips. "It seems all of our fun always gets ruined by something." He gave a small lick to Zim's lips, teasing him for a moment before he went on. "It's really annoying. Especially when I have so much hanging over my head and I just want to spend time with you."

Zim closed his eyes, leaning his head back to rest against Dib's shoulder, letting Dib touch and lick as he pleased. "Spending time with Zim and spending time with Zim without his clothes on are two different things." His smirk spread more crooked. "Nice try though." He patted the top of Dib's head. "I know you're trying to be alluring and sentimental at the same time."

"Well, either one seems to be working pretty well as far as I can tell." Dib moved one hand back up and rested it on Zim's chin. He turned the teen's face just a bit and pressed a kiss on his lips, licking at them for a few seconds before he pushed his tongue past. His other hand moved along the exposed skin, a finger twirling around where a belly button should have been, then slowly trailing down.

Zim gave in, giving into the kiss, the touch. Though it didn't last long, and he broke the kiss, turning his head the other way, wiping the hot saliva from his lifts with the back of his gloved hand. "... You're much too eager for your own good." He lowered his hand back to his side. "Though I might replace the word 'eager' with 'trusting'." He glanced back at Dib with a slight smirk. "Which is amusing to say."

Dib stared at Zim for a few seconds before he shrugged his shoulders. His hand that had been moving down went back to the teen's side and stayed there for the moment as he spoke up. "I probably am, but what was it you said about me? That I was love sick?" His one hand fell back down to rest at Zim's other side as he turned his attention to the far side of the club. "If that's the case, then it would only make sense that I was so trusting of you."

" 'Love sick'?" Zim repeated, blinking his eyes wider. He gave a slight nervous laugh, the term was only suppose to be a passing comment. Apparently not so. How unnerving. "I highly doubt it. What's that phrase? 'Passing fancy'. My type," he shook his head, "I'm not long term." There were several truths in that.

Dib frowned at the other's words and his grip grew much more slack than it already was. "You're only saying that because you don't think I'll be able to stop all of this end of the world stuff." His eyes narrowed a bit and he rested his head on the other's shoulder, not really feeling the need to hold it up any longer. "You've been saying that kind of stuff this entire time since you told me. It's as if you have not one bit of faith in me at all. It doesn't matter how much I try, you still won't seem to care." He moved his head a bit to nuzzle his face against Zim's neck. "I really do wish you would believe me. About everything."

"I hope you figure it out." Zim toyed a little with the pierced lock atop Dib's head. "I really do. Cuz I really wanna spend another Tuesday with you. That would be neat. We'd be going steady then." He slipped his fingers into Dib's hair. "So… what do people do when they're 'going steady'? Is it any different than now?"

Dib stayed quiet for a few moments, even after the question was asked. He just wanted to ignore everything and stay how he was, but he knew Zim wouldn't like to be ignored for long. So, he moved away from the teen's neck and spoke clearly, trying to seem better than he actually felt. "It's a little different. We would spend a bit more time with each other. Although, the way you follow me around, we may as well already be going steady." He gave a small smile and moved a hand up to toy with Zim's shirt. Once again, there was silence for a little bit except for the loud music. "I should let you meet my dad. He was bugging me about you when I tried to bum money off of him." The words came out quiet and almost too hard to hear.

Zim glanced at Dib, pausing from twirling the long spike of hair around one claw. "I thought you didn't like your 'dad'." He raised his brows, now vainly interested. "What did you say about Zim?"

Dib gave a small smirk. "I don't." He closed his eyes, but it didn't stop his movements. All the worrying from earlier had just worn him out for the moment. "He was just wondering why I needed money again, so soon. I had to tell him something, so, I told him the truth. I told him I had a date and he was very," Dib raised a hand and moved it around. "ecstatic about it. I guess that's a good way of putting it." He let his hand drop back down. "He was very interested in you, but it was already getting really late. If he meets you, then what real harm can be done?" Of course after the words left him, Dib wasn't so sure.

Zim blinked a few times, looking upward trying to envision exactly what Dib's father was like. He'd seen older humans, but had no real experience or knowledge with parental figures of the human species. Putting the information he'd gotten from Dib about his father, Zim envisioned him to be a much older, much work orientated scientist guy; the image wasn't working at all. "Hmm. Think he'd like Zim?" It was weird to ask an opinion of himself rather than assuming everyone would love and adore him instantly.

Dib opened his eyes back up to glance to the side at Zim. "What isn't there to like?" He hugged the smaller body even closer and let his eyes slip close once more. "You have nothing to worry about. Plus, I think it will be interesting to show you off." He leaned the side of his head against Zim's own. "Then maybe I won't have to hide you in my room every time you decide to come over."

Zim tapped the tip of Dib's nose. "Didn't you say you didn't like boys once upon five days ago?" He pinched Dib's nose, clearing his throat to do a mock impression of the other's voice; whiney, sad, pathetic- perfect! " 'I was perfectly fine just being invisible, but no, now everyone is going to think I'm gay'. Like that? A few minutes ago you didn't look very invisible. In fact, you looked quite naked to Zim. Then again, you didn't come across as the kind of Dib who likes girls... or rather, the kind of Dib that girls like." He blinked a few times. "Except for Zita. Personally, I think she's a little crazy in the head herself for swooning for anything but the bathroom when hearing your poetry." He had started playing with Dib's brow piercing next.

A small blush came to Dib's cheeks at the mention of what he had just been doing only a few moments ago. Of course he picked a strange time to suddenly feel embarrassed about the situation. The talk of his poetry quickly changed his mood and had a sour expression coming to his face, even as Zim toyed with his piercing. "You're such a jerk. You always say such horrible things about my poetry." He buried his face in Zim's shirt as he mumbled his next words. "I bet you said so many good things about that other guy's stuff."

"That's because 'that other guy' doesn't write horrible poetry. He draws. Not like you did of Zim, but the kind of stuff you see on the sides of buildings with coloured sprays of paint. It's very pointy." Zim narrowed his eyes and his grin stayed. "Such a sad jealous Dib. So full of greedy monogamy for Zim." He patted Dib's head.

"Graffiti?" Dib blinked his eyes as he raised his head. "That's what he was doing?" He let out a small groan and tried once more to busy his head, suddenly feeling more than a little foolish. "I wasn't jealous." The words were obvious a complete lie. "I just didn't know any better." He tightened his hold around the smaller body.

Zim turned his head best he could to place a quick kiss on Dib's lips. "You're forgiven. And not just because you're an amusing, pink coloured creature that is too dumb for his height." He grinned wider as he pet along Dib's jaw line. "But because you're Zim's boyfriend. So lucky are you."

Dib narrowed his eyes after Zim's words, but there was still a small smirk on his face. "Gee, thanks." He moved his head a bit so he could press a kiss to Zim's finger. Once he pulled back he spoke up again while keeping his eyes on the other's face. "Is it so wrong of me to be greedy, though? Everything about you is so perfect." One of his hands slid up Zim's side as he said the words. "Someone else might come along and want you just as much as I do."

"Really?" Zim's interest perked, mostly for the right stroke across his ego. "Like 'that other guy'?" He pointed to the goth still at his seat who was staring at them and scaring poor Zita. "And Zim is rather perfect, aren't I?" Zim leaned back against Dib, slipping his arms back up and around Dib's neck, wordlessly giving the boy permission to touch where he wanted. "What do you find so perfect about Zim?"

"Just like him." As soon as Zim wrapped his arms around his neck, Dib took that as an invitation to touch the teen's skin as much as he wanted. One hand slipped under Zim's shirt to barely brush fingers against the skin. His other hand stayed as it was on an exposed hip, but his fingers did dip down just a bit to stay tucked inside the skirt. Zim's last question caused him to let out a thoughtful noise, but it didn't take him very long to actually answer. "The way you look. The way you act. You can be so playful and so forward about what you want." He shrugged his shoulders. "Even if I didn't like such a thing when I first met you, I couldn't help but let if grow on me." He gave a small smile as he ran his finger up Zim's chest. "And everything about you is attractive. You're perfect up and down in that department." He leaned down and gave a small lick to Zim's neck before he spoke up again. "I said you were addictive, and I wasn't lying."

Zim seemed rather pleased with those answers, as well as the attention given. "And I'm tall." he added. "Where I'm from, my height gives me a lot of respect. Being around me would be a great honor. Not to mention my achievements, my ruthlessness, my integrity. Zim did well for himself back home." He let out a pleased audible sigh as fingers ran across his chest, the lick had only made his grin just that much more lazy. "You get points for knowing quality when you see it."

"Well, considering all of that, I guess I really am lucky." Dib raised his head back up and turned it just a bit to give the corner of Zim's lips a playful lick. "To have someone like you come to this city and decide to bug me out of everyone else. I guess I should thank my teacher for giving me the job to show you around." He left a wet trail down to the teen's chin where he sucked for a few seconds before speaking again. "Because I'm loving the end result."

Zim gave a giddy sort of giggle at the ticklish sensations Dib did with his mouth. "Well, sadly Zim doesn't believe in luck, or random events. Everything happens for a reason, set off by reasons before that, and then reasons before those reasons. A catalyst, with predictable results. Maybe you were picked because you weren't paying attention in class and the teacher wanted you out, but maybe he just wanted to lash out at some student because he forgot his lunch, and maybe he forgot his lunch because his dog ate his socks and his dog ate his socks because the teacher didn't feed him the day before because his car exploded and maybe his car exploded, and his car exploded because some random teenagers were bored and maybe those teenagers were bored because there was nothing on the television and maybe there wasn't anything on because the people who work at the station all died so they put on reruns. And maybe the people died because a poisonous snake fell in the main water pipes." Zim gave a slight shrug after his long spiel, giving a slight smirk. "Of course, you could have been anyone else. And Zim would just be licking someone else. Though, I would be missing out on these little fellows." He toyed with the piercings at Dib's ear.

Dib had been amused by Zim's sudden story and his smile could be felt against the other's skin as he pulled his mouth away. The touch at his ear caused him to give a small noise before he leaned into it and rested his head back down on Zim's shoulder. "So, you only like me for my piercings then?" He glanced at Zim through partly closed eyes as he started to tease. "I'm hurt, really."

"No. You're not. For your reasons are just as shallow." Zim flicked the sharp lock of hair causing the piercing to jingle. "But, as always, you're forgiven." He glanced at the boy with a perk of brow. "Will you be licking Zim naked at your place, too? In front of your father?" He laughed mused at that.

Dib shook his head, but couldn't keep his own laugh in as well. "No, I don't think so. As amusing as it would be to see him react to such a scene, I don't think I want to deal with it." He couldn't hide his grin. "Although, I'm sure he would say something like 'Ah, Dib, you're opening up. That's nice.' while being traumatized at the same time."

Zim mused at that with a cackle. "Excellent. It should definitely be done then." He glanced around. "So, is this all this place has to offer? Or does it do more... than this?" He slipped his hands back, running along Dib's sides to the boy's hips, slipping back to slip a few fingers into the boy's back pockets. He kept the other's hips close so they could follow he rolled his hips in a slow circle. "Or that?" Zim's grin perked.

There came a poke to Dib's shoulder. "Can I have a dance?" Zita asked, her violet eyes big and hopeful.

Dib had been just about ready to answer Zim, and had to literally bite back a groan as he felt the tap to his shoulder. It took all his willpower not to let the sound out as he turned his attention on Zita, the words he was about to say to Zim lost for the moment as he thought over the request. It seemed a bit wrong to him to suddenly let go of Zim when he had just gotten so jealous moments ago over what seemed like such a silly situation now. But, the way the girl was looking at him, he couldn't help letting out a small sigh. Despite his hatred of everyone else, she had tried to help them earlier at Skool.

"I guess so." He pulled his hands away from Zim and placed a small kiss on the teen's cheek. "Go flirt with your friend for a little bit." The words were playful and he stroked Zim's sides after he said them before pulling completely away. He turned to Zita and took the girl's hands. "Come on, one dance and that's it."

The girl squealed and Zim seemed less than impressed, if not down right insulted. Dib's actions were hypocritical and it rubbed Zim the wrong way. He huffed and turned his nose up at Dib. "I'll do more than just _'flirt'_, thanks." Zim walked off towards the lonely goth, ready to be far more than just friendly with his new found 'friend'.

Zita, on the other hand, was absolutely thrilled. She was nearly bouncing when Dib took her hands and she stepped in front of him on the dance floor. "Thank you, Dib. I've always wanted to dance here. But I've never really had the courage to ask... and no one here really seems like they want to dance."

"Yeah, well, it's not the kind of crowd that really moves around a lot." Dib gave a weak smile at that. He wasn't about to dance with Zita in the same fashion he had with Zim. Instead, he placed his hands on the girl's hips, but they just barely hung on. "You would probably be better off going to one of those raver clubs. Ya know, the ones with the neon lights and weird techno music. I'm sure you'll get along fine with some people there." He shrugged after he said the words.

Zita seemed rather giddy after she placed her hands on Dib's bare shoulders, and for reasons untold, she couldn't seem to raise her gaze from his naked chest all to well. "I would... but they check I.D. at the door." She gave a small look of disappointment. She looked back up to Dib's face. "Have you gone to many raves?" She gave a slight hopeful smile. "Would you take me to one?" The girl was almost bouncing on her toes again in excitement.

Across from them at the table, Zim had invaded and conquered the lone goth's lap, though he didn't look all that pleased about it. He rested his chin on the other's shoulder, draping his arms around his neck, glaring something mean at both Dib and Zita. The goth wasn't sure what to make of the other on his lap; whether he should dare, or steer clear of the boyfriend's jealous wrath.

Dib shook his head and frowned at the request. "I'm not much for raves, Zita." The frown disappeared and he gave a small laugh. "You've seen how well I do with social interaction. Do you really think I would ever be caught dead at a rave?" He shook his head. "I think I'm fine just coming to this place every once in a while."

"Oh." Zita downcast her gaze at Dib's chest again "You know... I've always liked poetry. Zim told me you wrote some, about him I think. I think that's sweet, writing poetry for others." She glanced nervously up at him. "Maybe... I could read yours sometime? I've always wondered what you're always writing about... all by yourself all the time."

Dib looked past Zita, towards the far wall of the club. "I like to keep it all to myself. The only reason Zim knows anything about it is because he was nosey." He gave a small smirk at that. "I don't really mind it much anymore. It does hurt a bit when he makes fun of it, but I guess it can't be helped." He looked back at Zita. "I don't really want anyone else reading any of it, though, so..." He gave a small grin. "...you'll just have to keep guessing."

"Aww." Zita pouted. "Well... could you write a poem about me?" She rested her head down on Dib's chest, the action causing her to blush some as she looked up at him with big hopeful eyes. "Please? No ones ever written one for me before."

Well that had antenna twitching underneath wig as Zim watched; he couldn't have felt more irked, if he wasn't already Irken. That had done it, and Zim's loose moral about their relation got even looser. He sat back and glared at the goth, who blinked back a little too confused at the situation. "What's your name human paste?"

"Uh... It's Ween." the goth blinked more.

"Well 'Weenie', today is your lucky day. You'll get to taste Zim after all." Zim then slammed his mouth against the other's, making it deep and intimate giving the other not much say; not that he argued, not at all.

Dib shook his head, about to reject Zita's request and push the girl back a bit so he could gain more of his personal space back. That's when his eyes caught sight of what was going on across the room. His eyes widened for only a few seconds before they quickly narrowed and his hands fell from Zita's hips, back down to his sides. Every bit of jealousy he had felt earlier came back so much stronger, but it wasn't just that. He also felt hurt as well, and it had been that which he had been scared of this entire time the whole thing started.

Zita blinked, looking at Dib to why they'd suddenly stopped dancing when she followed Dib's gaze. "Oooohh no." She looked back up to Dib. "Are you going to go punch him? Or does this mean you two are breaking up?" Blunt and to the point, the girl was.

Dib ignored Zita's words and instead pushed past the girl to walk over to the two who were still lip locked. As soon as he was near enough, Dib reached a hand out to grab Zim's shoulder and pull the teen off of the goth's lap, not happy until Zim stumbled to his feet. Dib didn't care how tight his grip was, he just wanted to make sure Zim was face to face with him and he had no intention of letting go. "What are you doing?!" The words were cracked, but still angry and his eyes were narrowed even more.

Zim staggered but managed to stand, whipping his mouth with the back of his gloved hand as he eyed Dib with equal displeasure. "Perhaps you're in need of a new pair of glasses if you can't see for yourself." He dropped his hand back down. "You said 'flirt'. Zim flirted. Or did you forget that I licked your tongue the first time we met, Dib-human? Why don't you go dance away your monogamy!" He gripped Dib's wrist, pulling it from his shoulder, disliking the angry touch. "You were so busy _dancing_ I'm surprised you even noticed." Zim added bitterly.

Dib clenched the hand, which was cast away, at his side. "It was a joke, Zim. I was just playing around!" He shut his eyes for a few moments. He didn't want the other teen to see how upset he really was. "I didn't know you would actually do it. Besides, I was only being nice to Zita. She just wanted one dance." He finally opened his eyes back up, but they were no longer narrowed. "I thought it would be okay since she helped us at Skool." His hands went limp at his sides. "You didn't have to do that..."

"A pity dance?" Zim crossed his arms and scoffed. "Well, consider that a pity kiss. I was just being 'nice'. It was only 'one' kiss." He raised a finger up in gesture.

"... My life sucks." Ween hung his head, picking up his book again he began to write in it.

Dib frowned at what Zim said, but he didn't speak on it. Instead, he shook his head and moved to the table to pick up his shirt and put it back on. "Come on, let's just get going." He tied each string back up then picked up his coat and handed it over to Zim. "I still have to take you to the arcade."

Zim pushed the coat away in refusal. He didn't want any token of Dib's near him right then. "Fine. Let's go." He waved at Zita who came walking back. "Bye Zita, Weenie." He crossed his arms and headed towards the door without waiting for Dib.

Zita raised a brow. "They're both weird."

"... My life is a dark, dark pit, inescapable. I cry, tears of blood... and eels." Ween sniffled.

Zita stared at the goth. "... You scare me."


	16. Chapter 16

**brb suicide**

By Kitteh and NeoFox

**Rating** PG

**Warnings** It's gay ya'know. It's gay.

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** ZADR. AU. A bass ackwards universe in which Dib is just your regular run of the mill emo in middle skool, his father isn't the renowned Professor and Zim is actually smart and oh so fabulous.

**Beta** Tanalilt

Chapter 16

The walk to the arcade wasn't really that long at all, since the building was only a few short blocks away. To Dib, it felt like eternity. There had been complete silence the whole walk, and his mood had not lifted once the entire time coming out of the club. Since Zim had refused his coat, Dib had gladly put it back on. It had gotten much colder, so he was at least a little happy that he didn't have to deal with that. As soon as they were both near the doors, Dib still opened them for the other teen. Even though he had reason, he wouldn't act like a complete jerk on a date.

The inside of the arcade wasn't very crowded. Most of the usual teens that lurked inside had already wasted all of their money and gone home. There were only a few lurkers, but even they were mostly standing around, wishing that they had money to spend. Dib paid none of them any mind, and instead looked down at Zim, trying to find something to say. He was still at a loss for words, though and only shrugged his shoulders. "What do you wanna play first?" It was the only real thing he could ask.

Zim looked from one side straight through to the other; such primitive gaming systems. This was past 'old skool', this was down right chalk drawings on a cave wall. "A game where you kill humans, lots of blood, lots screaming, lots of begging for mercy but you kill their pathetic selves anyway." He crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes at Dib, tapping a foot expectantly. "Have any of those? Zim has some frustration to vent. Anger, sexual, excreta, excreta." He twirled a hand as he spoke.

Dib ignored Zim's reasonings as he looked back up at each game around. His eyes caught sight of a couple of shooters that were unoccupied in the far corner of the arcade. He pointed towards them with one hand while he dug in his pocket with the other. "You can try those out. I haven't been here in a long time so, I can't remember what they're like." He handed some money over to Zim then dropped his hands back down. "I'm sure they're all full of zombies and blood, and what not."

Claws took one of the quarters, rolling it curiously between them as Zim looked it over. He perked some and glanced to Dib. "Zombies? I like zombies. Zombies are sexy." He plopped the quarter back in his palm with the others and snatched Dib's coat sleeve. "Come. Shoot sexy zombies with Zim." He gave the other no choice as he dragged him towards the machine.

Dib was surprised that Zim actually wanted him anywhere near the same game, but he didn't try to protest. "Alright, sure." It didn't mean he still wasn't upset. He was fine with shooting things just as much as Zim was. As soon as they got to the machine, Dib picked up one of the guns and clicked the trigger a few times even though the coins still hadn't been placed in.

Zim looked the machine up and down and scoffed to himself. He inserted the coins needed for either of them, the game gave a shriek with each one. Zim blinked. "... Charming." He put the rest in a pants pocket under his skirt. He took up the gun rather gingerly and watched on the screen the 'story' for the game. Two police fellows walked on screen, polygon as can be, into a 'necro' science lab looking for a phone because their car stopped. Zim tapped the screen pointing to the guy with the black hair (the other had blonde, otherwise they were identical). "That guy is me. And my guy, he's SO doing your guy. They just got back from a romp in the back seat. See, that's why the car is REALLY broken. Too much force put into pelvic thrust." Zim wryly looked at Dib. "Oh. And your guy: bottoms. Born a bitch, die a bitch." He grinned teeth.

Dib stared at the screen for a good long while before he finally turned his attention back to Zim. He tried to open his mouth, but no sound would come out. He tried a different tactic and moved his hand that held the gun, pointing it at Zim as he tried to get some kind of point across. That didn't work either. In the end, Dib let out a long sigh and shook his head, turning his eyes back to the screen as a small smirk came to his face and only one word finally left him. "Pervert."

Zim's grin was everything victorious and he cackled low through his teeth. "I totally am." He nodded agreeingly, looking back to the screen.

In game the two cops, on closer inspection of inside the lab, found their shock when equally god awful polygon zombies, oozing green blood with red blood dripping from their mouth, jumped out to attack them.

'My GOD, they're, they're not human!' one police guy badly acted. 'What HAPPENED here!?'

"Orgy gone bad. The dogs were allergic to peanut butter, and the gerbils were rabid." Zim lifted his gun to point it at the screen as the actual game started.

Dib looked over at Zim once more with a raised brow, but quickly realized he wasn't surviving too well in the game. That's when he looked back at the screen and started to shoot as best he could. Most of his shots missed, but he got by well enough, having to reload every few seconds considering he went through bullets like water.

Zim, on the other hand, went on a bloody massacre, shooting legs and arms off first with a cackle to watch the zombies bumble around trying to attack with limbs they didn't have. He riddled their bodies with bullets before putting them out of their misery with a head shot. A survivor ran across the screen as they went pleading for help and Zim shot them, several times over with a cackle. "Taste Zim's mercy! It is delish!"

Dib was about to speak up about how those people weren't exactly targets, but, he didn't want to ruin Zim's fun. He gave a simple shrug and continued his own small rampage, less bloody and with more shots to walls than bodies. A few of the lurkers were starting to watch because of Zim's small shouts, and it caused Dib to glance back and his character to loose a good amount of health.

"Poor police-man-Dib. So sad from the zombie nibbles." Zim pegged each zombie in the head in the group that were attack Dib. He gave a winning grin, blowing the 'smoke' from his gun, giving a wink Dib's way knowing the boy would hate the gloating. Then on the screen new zombies popped out, giggling bouncy clown zombies that completely ruined Zim's demeanor as he let out a terrified shriek, dropping his gun as he ran from the game to hide behind a group of street fighting arcade games.

The sudden change in mood startled Dib, but he didn't really have time to react. He had more to deal with than just his own batch of zombies. He fired shot after shot at each one, but he was doing just as well then as he was before. Halfway through it was game over and Dib let out a defeated noise. One of the lurkers sipped at a soda before mumbling a 'you suck' and walking away. That only caused Dib to growl and turn around clicking the trigger at the teen, wishing it would actually fire in real life.

Zim peered past the 'Klucky-foo Turkey' arcade game at Dib, eyes wide. "Are they gone?"

Dib quickly turned, startled when he heard Zim's voice. At first the question confused him, but it didn't take long for him to understand what the teen meant. "Yeah, they're gone." He put the gun back where it belonged and stepped away from the game, walking towards Zim. "Would you rather play something else? I'm obviously no good at that anyway."

When Dib was near Zim gripped Dib's sleeves, peering past him at the game and gave a disappointed pout. "Aww. You lost." He looked up at Dib. "You didn't kill them and avenge your oh-so-amazing police-man lover." He smirked. "You should have ran back to the car and had one last fling in the back seat." His eyes snapped wide. "Or were you made a lov'n slave by those scary _things_." Zim shuddered in utter disgust.

Dib gave a small grin at that. He shifted around a bit to take his coat off, and as soon as the large piece of clothing was off his body he draped it over Zim's shoulders instead. Still amused at how it almost covered the entire teen's frame. "Don't worry, I still belong to the police-man." He leaned down and kissed Zim's forehead, pulling back just as quickly after.

Zim blinked a few times before he quickly slipped his arms through the sleeves of the coat, adjusting it to no real means on his shoulders. "Good." He nodded, returning with a new grin. "Because this police-guy has the best durn back seat in all of the known universes - even some of the parallel ones." He swayed his hips in a cocky fashion, not that it could be seen too well under the large trench coat.

Dib couldn't help laughing and easily wrapped his arms around Zim's waist afterwards, pulling the smaller body close to his own. He ran the metal stud on his tongue against Zim's neck for a few seconds before he spoke up as he pulled back. "We should make good use of it."

Zim squirmed but gave a laugh of his own. "Before _they_ come and get you. Drag you away and make you their zombie pleasure slave. Of course Zim will survive, thanks to his expert shooting ability. He'll be sad in losing his back seat buddy. Burn his car in memory of his police-partner-guy." He surveyed each game around them. "What game now?"

Dib moved his head back up and looked around. One of his hands left Zim's waist so he could point to each machine as he named it. "Well, there are a few fighting games we could try. Some sports games, but, I don't know much about those." His hand then moved over to point at a large machine with a few rails on it. "There's that weird dance game everyone usually plays." He then pointed towards a few other machines. "Some space shooter games. Weird, alien stuff. That kind of thing." His hand dropped back down. "Take your pick."

"Dance?" Zim looked to the dancing game machine, with its many flashing lights. "Flash dance." He looked at Dib with interested amusement. "Dance like we danced at the dark screamy dance place we were just at? Now that sounds like a game Zim could very much like playing… -a lot."

Dib shook his head while he pulled back from the other. "No, not like that. It's much different." He rolled his eyes as he looked towards the machine. "A lot more annoying as well." He stared at the machine for a few moments before he couldn't take the lights anymore. "It's more like a competition, I guess you could say. You have to follow these little arrows, and if you keep missing, you fail."

"Sounds unnaturally complicated, freakish, and wrong. Let's go dance!" Zim grabbed Dib's shirt and pulled him over to the flashing dance game. He looked down. "So. Those are the arrows? And you dance on the arrows?" He poked them with a foot. He stepped on one and then stepped on another. "It's like some giant, mutated controller. For your feet."

Dib whined as he was pulled along. He hated the game so much, and never really played it. He had only done so once when he had come to the arcade, and a few people pushed him onto it during a weird dance-off. "You step on whatever arrow the game tells you to at the time. It takes some coordination." He looked up at the screen and pointed. "See how the arrows are hitting the mark? You have to hit those same marks with your feet."

Zim poked the arrows on the ground with his feet with what the demo did on the screen, glancing down a few times, feeling a little dizzy after he did it quickly too many times. "Doesn't seem too difficult. I have excellent coordination! And oh-so-amazing legs." He ran claws up and down his thin legs with a smirk. The green boy then fed the machine quarters for the both of them. Sticking out his tongue Zim poked around at the options before he surfed through the different songs they could dance to. "Stupid, Dumb. Smelly. Ugly. Ugh... it burns. Nope. No. Newp. Nuh-uh. Nada. No, the singer sounds like she swallowed a cheese grater. Oh! This one sounds decent." Zim selected the song before moving back to his dance pad. He glanced to Dib. "Just remember, move your hips, Dib-pet. At least you'd look good while losing horribly to Zim." He narrowed eyes and smirked.

Dib hadn't planned on playing at all, but since he was suddenly an unwilling participant, he had no choice. He narrowed his eyes on Zim for a few seconds and even as he stepped onto the large dance pad. "I don't see why you couldn't have done this yourself." He heard the song start up and quickly turned his eyes to the screen. The arrows were starting to move up, and with them Dib almost stumbled to try his best to keep up, hitting his feet on each one that was below him. He saw a lot of 'poor' and not a lot of 'perfect'.

Zim kept flicking his eyes back up and down, growing dizzy a few times and almost stumbling off the dance stand. "So… so many colours. They dance, and move-- and this game would be great after about ten glasses of coffee." He watched Dib dance, gathering how the game should be played, but he bounced with both feet on single arrows just to mess around. He cackled when he got the beat down, gaining a few 'perfects', beating Dib's score; which wasn't all that hard. Though the game would have been so much easier to play with precision if he could use the metal spider limbs in his pak; it would defeat the entire purpose of a secret identity - but at least he'd win the game.

Dib gave up on actually trying to win - there was no point. Instead, he gave in and decided to have a little fun with the machine. He screwed around, trying to use only one foot, hopping around from arrow to arrow. That made his score even worse, but that was the least of his worries. His eyes turned to Zim, and a small grin grew on his face. With his other foot, he moved it and pushed at the teen's foot that was closest to him. Anything to play around and mess Zim up.

Zim swatted Dib. "Hey! No cheating." He gave a smirk. "Or I'll come over and do this-!" He leapt from his dance pad onto Dib's, stomping on the wrong arrows and sometimes the right ones. The sad fact was that Zim's messing around improved Dib's score, more than it lowered it.

Dib was about to yell at Zim to stop, but shut his mouth when he saw his score. He stepped back a bit near the railing to watch, but soon started to grin. "Fine then." With those two simple words, Dib moved off of his side and onto Zim's own. Of course, when he started to press onto Zim's arrows it didn't exactly help Zim's score.

"H-heeyy." Zim huffed. The song ended and both their ending score results were horrible. "Aww. You made my score worse. But I made yours better." He tapped the screen. He leaned back on the rail and crossed his legs at the ankle. "Your turn to pick the song, dance-dance-dancer-Dib."

The same random lurker stared at the screen, slurping his cola. They looked at Dib. "You suck." And they walked off again.

The voice caused Dib to turn around and glare at the person's back. He wanted the gun back, even though it wouldn't do anything. With a huff, he turned his eyes back to the screen and started to pick through each of the songs. He hated every single one. They all sounded so upbeat. He finally settled on one that didn't pierce his ears too badly and moved back to his original spot. "I feel like I'm going to need a shower after all of this is over."

Zim perked Dib's way. "Can Zim join?" But before Dib could answer, the song started and the green teen was instantly engrossed in getting constant perfects; while showing off best he could with a sway of hips here and there.

The question made Dib forget about the game for a moment and turn his attention to Zim. "What?" But, seeing that the other was suddenly dancing, he remembered he was supposed to be doing the same thing. He couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from Zim's body, though, and he really didn't care all the much for the game. So, it was easy to tell which won out in the end as Dib's score got worse and worse.

Zim glanced at Dib's side of the screen then Dib himself. "Would you like it better if I danced naked? It would give you so much more to look at, especially when Zim jumps up and down." The song ended and his gaze flicked to their score. Zim admired his better score while amused over Dib's terrible one. He leaned back to the railing once more, slouching leisurely in a cocky stance. Bragging his victory in a grin rather than boasting.

The suggestion caused Dib to blush. When the song ended, he quickly looked back at the screen, but knowing he would loose, it didn't matter much to him. He looked back at Zim and narrowed his eyes. The way Zim was grinning didn't really upset him, but he did plan to do something about it. He moved over to stand beside the shorter teen, and leaned down to bite at Zim's lips playfully. When he pulled back he spoke up in a small whine. "I'm no good at that game. Of course you're gonna win." After he spoke he went right back to teasing the other, giving a small lick.

Zim gave a lazy grin. "Well, technically, I'm on your dance control thingy. So... technically, you're winning." He bit at the other's tongue playfully. "You, the person, are the loser." He lifted a hand from the railing he leaned on to pull Dib's head down, licking the other's bottom lip before he kissed him, snaking his tongue into Dib's mouth for a deeper kiss with a happy sound in his throat.

Dib gave a small groan against the kiss, moving his tongue along the thin one invading his mouth. His thoughts suddenly went back to the club, and what he had caught Zim doing. The jealousy came back and he wrapped his arms around the smaller body, pulling Zim closer as he pressed more into the kiss, biting lightly at Zim's tongue.

Zim pushed up from the rail with his free hand closer to Dib, wrapping that arm around the boy's neck too. He let out a noise as he played with the other's tongue ring with his tongue, pulling away after a moment. "You're a horrible shot, a horrible dancer, but… at least you don't fail at i everything /i ." His one hand trailed down Dib's front to toy with the piercing at the boy's belly button.

Dib gave a weak laugh and shook his head. "Thanks, I guess." He couldn't help letting out a small noise as Zim toyed with the sensitive piercing, but he didn't stop him. It felt good in a way, so he didn't mind it. Instead, he nuzzled his head near the other's and moved a hand up to brush his fingers through Zim's hair.

"The game is starting without us." But Zim didn't sounded like he cared all that much. It amused him how Dib treated the wig as if it were really his own hair, and he couldn't help but be amused for the day he'd rip it off and show Dib what was really underneath. It was mean, but funny.

Zim snuck a hand back to rub at his own lips, licking away the mildly burning saliva as well. "In truth... you are the better kisser. Even if neither of you have the experience at it." He pushed himself closer and higher up Dib's body to flick one of the dangling hoop piercings at the boy's ear. "You just add lib better."

Dib leaned his head into the tongue and let out a small humming sound. Zim's words caused his mood to lift, and he tightened his hold around Zim, hugging the teen as best he could, considering the large jacket. "Well, that makes me feel better." He pouted a bit, but it was easy to tell by his voice that he was still easily happy with everything. "You still didn't have to kiss him, though." He kissed Zim's cheek before he went on. "You could have just dragged me away from Zita if you were really upset. I wouldn't have minded."

"But you make a much cuter jealous boyfriend" Zim flicked his tongue across the Dib's bottom lip "than Zim. You get grumpy, I just get even. I'm mean, I can't help it. I see what I want, and I conquer. I can't help it. I was born that way." His lips peeled back grinning at something that only he seemed to know. "And where I'm from, it's a good thing."

That time Dib really did pout. "I don't like having to become jealous. It's a horrible feeling." He rested his head on Zim's shoulder and shut his eyes, not caring that they were taking up the dance machine as a spot to cuddle. No one seemed to be around anyway. "I should take you somewhere secluded on our next date. That way I can have you all to myself."

"I recommend your moon. Very secluded. No gravity. Lack of atmosphere might be a problem though." Zim toyed with the tip of Dib's sharp lock of hair, causing the piercing to jingle around. "I'll admit things are different here than where I'm from. I'm not used to _this_ ... But... don't forget about the SOUP."

Zim gave a small sigh and gave in to the clingy boy cuddling him. There was no escaping the lonely boy's hugging wrath. So Zim wrapped his arms around Dib's neck and snuggled the crook of neck and shoulders in something other than suggestively. "Tell you what..." he murmured quietly. "If you beat this, Zim will be the one to take you out... On our first date of 'going steady'." He gave a small kiss below Dib's ear.

The suggestion caused Dib to smile as did the kiss. "I'd like that." He ran his hand up and down Zim's back, despite the heavy coat. He let out a small breath against Zim's skin, and it ruffled a bit of the other's hair as well. "After this date I'll more than likely go right back to trying to figure everything out. It's how I'll spend all day tomorrow as well." He shook his head a bit. "It's aggravating, but I'm not going to loose you when I just got my hands on you." He raised his head a bit so he could press a quick kiss to Zim's lips.

Zim smirked and then made a playful face of disgust. "It'll probably be something disgustingly romantic, with candles that smell like stuff, and hearts everywhere and duckies and unicorns and everywhere you look there'll be the colour red, pink with lacy frills." He really laughed then. "Or maybe I'll just buy you lingerie, call it even. At least you'd feel pretty." He raised a hand to stifle his teasing laughter. "And don't you know anything, Dib-pet? Hands go _under_ the coat." Zim reached behind to tug Dib's hands away to slip them under the trench coat he wore to exactly where they had been behind his back.

Dib shook his head, but all the same, he ran his hands up and down Zim's back, happy that the coat was out of the way. "Well, as long as there was some effort put into it, then go for it." He frowned for only a moment before he shook his head. "But I don't know, thinking about it, all of that does seem a bit over the top. Maybe just something simple. Simple keeps me happy."

"Simple." Zim pursed his lips, raising one brow while narrowing one eye. "But simple is so boring. Simple." He tapped his lips, actually giving it some thought, despite knowing the even would never happen. "Simple as in- uh... just… sitting? Or... standing? Simple. Simple. Simple. I think you're simple in the head to be happy with simple. The more extravagant and complicated, I find, is more fun. But- you are a Dib, and Dibs like things simple." Zim scratched an itch his wig was giving him. "I dunno. What simple things do Dibs like?"

"Well, certainly nothing frilly or lacy." Dib grinned as he pulled back to look Zim in the eye. "Maybe just a normal night alone with you. "He blinked for a second as he thought about it. "At your house. Definitely at your house." He thought more on it and shook his head. "And no green dog. That thing scares me." He looked back at Zim and leaned in once more to steal a quick kiss before he went on. "When all is said and done, maybe I won't even be leaving your house." He pressed another kiss to Zim's lips, but it was hard not to grin.

Zim stared blankly at Dib. He planted a hand on the boy's face and pushed it away since Dib didn't seem to be stopping with the kissing anytime soon. The green boy blinked a few times, still giving Dib a blank look, raising one brow. "Why?" he asked in all honesty. He was intelligent, a fast learner, but he was far from being a native of the planet.

Dib frowned when he was pushed back. He moved a hand up to remove Zim's own and looked down at the other teen after the question was asked. At first he thought Zim was joking, but the look on the other's face made it obvious he wasn't. So, instead, he dropped his hands back down and let them lower much further than just Zim's back. "Well, I might want to stay and actually lick you all over." His hands slipped under Zim's skirt to move over the teen's rear. "Just like you wanted." He leaned over once more, but instead of kissing Zim, he only rested his forehead against the other's. "And there won't be any interruptions next time."

Zim's eyes snapped open, for a myriad of reasons but he got the picture, and he lowered his eyes back half closed. "My, my, getting ahead of ourselves aren't we." He clicked his tongue. "You think saving the world will earn you a ticket under Zim's skirt?" He poked Dib's nose and smirked a little dryly. "We've barely met each other a week, this is our first real real i real /i date. You've already licked Zim naked in public, soon to be going steady with him in two days or so _if_ you succeed. Eager, much? And if you get the whole cow so soon... you won't be interested in the milk anymore." He reached into his coat and pulled Dib's friendly hands away as he took two long strides back. "Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder... or... _something_ grows, anyway." He hopped off the dance pad with a short laugh. If her Tallest knew how deep in he was, she'd have him executed on the spot, or worse, demoted and exiled. Zim tried not to shudder.

Dib pouted when he was denied anymore touch, and watched as Zim walked away from him. "You seemed to be just as eager as I was a while ago in the club." He looked back at the dance machine, which was back at the demo screen. He shrugged at that. It only meant he wouldn't have to make more of a fool of himself. "At any rate, is there anything else that you wanted to play?" He turned his eyes back to Zim while he got off of the machine. "You should still have enough coins, and if not, I think I have some more to give you."

Zim slowed his step turning his head, his hair barely brushing from his sight as he lowered his head to glance at Dib. "What Zim wants to play, you can't pay for. At least, not with moneys. At least... " his eyes flicked down Dib's body for a quick second "not with what you have in your pocket." He gave a teasing laugh as he strolled away, waving Dib off with a hand as he made his way to look at the more gore-ier fighting games. "Tallest! What kind of 'human' do you think Zim is." He glanced back with half lidded glance. "... It takes a little more, Dib-pet." He laughed a bit more, to himself this time.

That words didn't help Dib's mood at all, and only caused him to pout worse. "I think you're the type that gets his kicks from teasing others and in turn causing them to beg." He followed after the other, looking towards the games Zim had his eye on a moment ago. "At least, that's my take on it." He shrugged his shoulders and looked back to Zim. "Like you said, I was on my knees for you a while ago. So, you must have some sort of charm about you. Or you have something. That's for sure."

"I have the powers of 'fabulous' on my side. Oh so charming. None can resist this!" Zim threw back the tail end of the trench coat with a flare so he could pat his hip with a grin. "As you have seen, _none_ at all." He cackled to himself as he walked to a particularly gory looking fighting game and stuck out a hand snapping fingers, making gimmie gesture after. "Give Zim coins."

Dib rolled his eyes at the gesture, but dug in his pocket anyway to pull out more change. In a matter of seconds, he brought out a few more quarters and handed them over to Zim. "You could say please." The words didn't stop the grin on his face, and afterwards he leaned against the side of the machine the other was near.

"Pleasing is a Dib's job." Zim took the coins and stuffed a few into the machine. He curiously tapped the buttons and soon was choosing his character. "No. No. Smelly. Ugly. Looks like corn. SQUID!" He hammered on the start button to choose the squid character, which pointlessly had thick black rimmed glasses on. "Awww. It looks just like you- tentacles and all." Zim grinned Dib's way.

Dib leaned around the machine to look at what Zim was talking about. The image he saw caused him to narrow his eyes, but he was hardly annoyed. "Very funny." He turned back around and relaxed once more against the machine, closing his eyes. "Don't get upset if it has my poor strength, either."

"Don't worry, he's the squid you always wished you were." Zim started hammering the buttons as he was thrown into battle. "He fights much better." He let out a long impressed sound that was quite feminine and he jumped up and down enthusiastically squealing as he clacked buttons. "OooOohh- those tentacles! So manly!" Zim let out a breathy sound and he pounded one particular button over and over. "Harder. Harder! HARDER! Oh- OH the Tallest- Yes! YES!" Zim threw back his head, his dark hair spilling back. On the screen flashed the words 'VICTORY!'. Zim bounced on the balls of his feet doing a little happy dance.

Dib's eyes snapped open at the noises and loud shouts. As soon as he could see again, he realized they had an audience of the few people that still lingered. He wasn't the only one that Zim seemed to have gotten the attention of. Of course the crowd wasn't really the real thing on Dib's mind and he felt very uncomfortable at that moment. "You're really loud." It was the only thing he could mutter with a weak voice.

"Huh?" Zim stopped his bouncing and lowered his arms with a grin. "Oh. Yes, I am. But you won't be privy to _that_ information until much much MUCH later. And definitely not tonight, hunny. But-" he pointed down on Dib "you are poke'n." Zim chuckled loudly before he went back to playing his game.

Those last words had Dib stuttering without any real words. Finally after a while he let out a groan as he quickly slid down the machine to curl his legs to his chest. He tried to hide away his face among other things while he mumbled. "Somebody kill me, please."

"Later, Dib-pointy, I have a headache." Zim waved Dib off as he hammered the buttons again, making a squeak and squeal when he got a hit in.

One of the on lookers who had taken to watching while sipping their cola. They pointed at Dib and laughed at his misfortune "You suck."

Dib shot a glare at the other for the words. He wanted to get up so badly and punch the kid in the face, but he was weak and really did suck. And he just wasn't in the position to do anything at the moment. The best he could do was whine and bury his head.

Zim continuously mashed the buttons of the game in loud enthusiasm. On screen, limbs flew in every which direction as buckets of blood gushed from each minor cut and wound. It wasn't until his glasses-wearing squid was pummeled in the face a good few times by a giant slug that Zim let out a bunch of pathetic whimpers. "My squid died!" He jerked the joystick around as if that would bring his character back to life, but it only sped up the count down he had to insert more quarters to continue. "Dib-Dib-Dib-Dib-Dib-coins! I need coins! Gimmie gimmie!" He bounced on the spot, biting claws.

Dib groaned at the demand. It only meant he would have to dig for what little bit of change he had left. and that wasn't a very good idea at the moment. He poked an eye out from his knees to glance toward Zim. For a second he stayed silent before finally speaking up, hoping that the other teen bought his words. "I don't have anymore."

Zim's eyes snapped open wide and he jerked around to face Dib, completely desperate. "But my squid is dead! Won't you rouse him, Dib! Won't you erect him from the worm meal he will become! Before he grows stiff from rigor!" He bit the tips of his claws as he stifled his hilarious laughter trying to make them appear more like dramatic sobs.

The one eye Dib had on Zim widened with each word and he shifted around where he sat, pulling his knees even closer if possible. After a few moments he was still again and his eye narrowed on Zim as he let out a pathetic noise before speaking up again. "I hate you."

Zim tried to pout and look completely hurt by the remark, but he couldn't wipe the wicked grin from his lips to make it work. He glanced back at the game's screen. "You knoow, if you look at the squid just right- it kinda looks like a--" He looked back at Dib. "Does _yours_ have tentacles?" Zim cocked his head to the side and his grin could only grow just that much wider. "If maybe- I may just rethink you spending the night."

"He'll suck at that too." the cola drinking lurker commented off handedly before walking off again.

Dib gave another whine at that and wished he could just disappear off the face of the earth. "Maybe this is all just some horrible dream. I'll wake up and none of this will have ever happened." He moved a hand away from his knees to pinch at his arm, jumping a bit after the action. "Ow. No, still here."

Zim leaned against the arcade game and tapped his lips thoughtfully. "Well, if this was a dream" he twirled a finger with a lewd smirk "you'd need new sheets." He crossed his legs at the heel. "Especially for rather intimate part in the dance club… and on the dancing game." Zim wrinkled his nose. "Ewww. What if you're dreaming this in class? And everyone is pointing and giggling. That would be quite an embarrassing mess to wake up to." Zim smoothed his skirt with one hand, quite amused.

"You're not helping. At all." Dib turned his head once more to look over at Zim. Despite his bad mood, he couldn't really stay mad at the other teen. He started to tease Zim as he spoke up once more, trying to lighten his own mood as best he could. "And if this was a dream, how would you feel that you're the one I'm having these dreams about?"

"Hmm? Zim?" The green boy considered something with a purse of lips. "If Zim was dreaming this, you would know." He bared his teeth with a wide spread grin. "There would be a lot more action, a lot more entertainment, a lot more happy naked joy. You, Dib-pet, would be wearing a lovely pair of shackles. Oh- and I could fly. Just randomly: nyrrrrrrrrooooowwwww!" He made his hand zoom about in gesture.

Dib blinked his eyes and tried to imagine such a thing. Sadly, the only real thing that stuck in his mind was everything about being naked and himself in shackles. It just didn't help. He turned his eyes back around and buried them once more. "Lovely."

"I thought so, too." Zim gave up on his game, the timer had run out, anyway, and his interest had already left it. He sidled over to the uncomfortable-ball-o-Dib and crouched down in front of him, patting his knees. "So if you're moneys-less, does that mean our date is over?" Zim pouted, letting his hands drag down the sides of Dib's thighs as he whined his dramatic disappointment throatily. "How sad, Zim was just starting to _enjoy_ himself." His hands drew back up Dib's legs.

Dib jumped at the touches and he tried to move back further against the game, but Zim didn't seem to be having it. "I-I don't know." He shrugged his shoulders, but the action wasn't very clear considering how weak it was. "Stop doing that." The words came out as a whine.

Zim tilted his head causing his dark hair to cover more of his face than help his vision. "What?" He leaned closer, the corner of his lips hinging upward. "This?" His claws slipped higher atop Dib's thighs, fingers splayed as they continued to drag up and down, grasping just that much more. "But I'm your boyfriend, aren't I suppose to touch you in especially uncomfortably places?" Zim leaned closer still until his chest leaned against Dib's shins and knees. "I thought you liked it... when everyone saw." his voice fell especially low, smirking rigid teeth.

Dib's eyes shut halfway at Zim's actions, and he made sure to shut his mouth before any noise was let out. As soon as he was sure it was safe, Dib opened his mouth to speak while his eyes narrowed on Zim. "I thought you weren't ready for that kind of commitment, because trust me, I'm two seconds away from nailing you against this machine right here. Just to put it lightly." His eyes fell just a bit more after the words left him.

Zim paused a moment. "One. Two." He glanced around, left, right, up, down and shrugged. "Nothing. Guess it was a bluff." He gave a sheepish smirk and chuckle after that. "Oh well. I guess Zim will live after all." His claws slid lower again on Dib's legs. "No nails for him." he mused more quietly.

Dib let out another noise but that time it was more needy. What Zim was doing was complete torture, and the teen's words only caused him to become more aggravated. His mind had pretty much shut down long ago, so when he suddenly grabbed Zim, he surprised himself as well. He twisted them both around, pinning the smaller body against the machine in place of himself, and didn't even give Zim time to speak before his lips were on the other's. The kiss rough and wanting.

Zim's startled noise was muffled, along with any other choice words he wanted to make. He tried to push Dib away, but the boy had him pretty skillfully pressed up against the arcade. It was a position that Zim had a hard time arguing with, especially when Dib was so amorous, in every sense of the word. Zim tapped a foot, both legs draped at either of Dib's sides curled up and he gave up pushing Dib's shoulders. Promptly he planted a hand on Dib's face and pushed it away so he could catch a breath. "H-hey, stop that. That was more than two seconds." Zim huffed, blowing his dark hair from his face trying to look miffed but it only ended up looking stirred in a way he didn't want to portray. He clunked his head against the machine and tried to squirm free, clawing with his free hand up at the smooth side of the arcade for something to grasp and pull himself up. There, of course, was nothing, and he gave up with a breathy huff.

Dib gave an annoyed sound when he was pushed back, but the fact Zim couldn't get away caused him to grin. He leaned back in, but gave up on Zim's lips. Instead he attacked the teen's neck, nipping at the skin before he allowed his tongue to trail up Zim's throat. He let his hands slip inside the large coat and beneath Zim's skirt, not really caring if his hands got slapped away in the end. He just wanted to touch, lick, and generally feel any part of the other that he could.

Zim squirmed again with a frown, though little mewed whimpers escaped him at the attention. Dib's saliva was hot, but not unpleasant, which sent estranged shivers down to Zim's spooch. He drew his legs up, pressing them up against Dib's sides. Zim stopped in his weak attempts to get free of Dib to give the boy a rather sly look with half open eyes. "... You could put an eye out with that thing you know." He sifted his gaze over at the audience they still had lurking in the far corners of the arcade; what was it with humans and their voyeuristic need.

"If it happens, it happens." That was Dib's answer to things. He just wasn't thinking straight at all at the moment, too involved in other activities. He pulled his lips away from Zim's throat and moved his head up so he could lean in and touch his tongue to the teen's lips, licking them for a few seconds. Once he had his fun with that, he continued to tease and licked back down to Zim's chin, barely touching the skin.

"H-hot. Very _hot_." Zim commented with a low murmur in his throat. His own thin tongue swiped across his lips to taste the heat left there, dragging it back into his mouth. His head thudded back against the arcade, the sharp pain of squished antenna waking some sense into him. "I mean-- _ow_." The teen whipped a hand up to rub away the trails of saliva left by Dib's tongue. "It _burns_!" The loss of control wasn't something Zim liked; though why he didn't just shove Dib away, he didn't know. He had the strength to; though Dib seemed to be doing a very good job with his 'forcefully up against an arcade' tact in draining that strength away. He squirmed more, weakly kicking his legs at Dib's sides. "C'mooon, stoooop." Zim whined weakly; not the best counter measure he'd ever done.

Dib only shook his head a little at the weak order. To silence Zim, he moved his head back up and placed his lips on top of the other teen's, pushing his tongue past to curl it around Zim's own slim one. He sucked at the thin appendage, sliding the metal stud in his own tongue across the entire time. His hands, which had successfully gotten under Zim's skirt, pulled the fabric up to travel over legs. His nails lightly scratched down, trying to get to any part of Zim that he could.

Zim groaned weakly, though it would have been more menacing a sound had he not slid his arms to drape around Dib's neck, welcoming the other's tongue with his own. Then it occurred to him his predicament, and he pulled back from Dib's lips, though there was little room to gain from behind. "You're getting your rewards early. That isn't far to the rest of the group. Now come on." He patted Dib's cheek, not sure if he should be amused or fearful of his civility in the situation. "Go away."

Dib whined at the sudden loss of contact between them. He was tempted to continue, despite Zim's words, but figured he'd better not. Their audience was more than likely big enough as it was. "Fine. You win." He pulled away to stand up, moving a hand up to straighten his glasses a bit before he dropped it back down to his side. His eyes wandered around the arcade to look over the people watching and just as quickly he dropped his gaze back down as sudden embarrassment hit him hard.

Zim yanked his skirt back down, clunking his knees together to save what little modesty Dib had tongued away in public. He smoothed his wig down and cleared his throat. His eyes drew across the crowd, dancing across the line of amused and of all things, embarrassed; he didn't think _that_ was possible. He raised a claw up expectedly. "Up Zim."

Dib dropped his eyes back to Zim. The sudden command had startled him out of his thoughts and confused him for a second. "Huh? Oh, right." He leaned down a little to take Zim's hand, helping the other up even though he, himself, still felt much too shaky to really do much of anything but stand there. Once he was sure Zim could stand on two feet by himself, Dib took his hand back and shoved it in his pocket for the time being. There were still a few coins in there that they could use, but he remembered earlier he had told Zim he had no more just to get the other to leave him alone. It was best he kept the lie going.

Zim teetered a little, and ended up thudding his back against the arcade he'd previously been pinned upon. He ran his claws through his wig, smoothing down the antenna underneath to collect himself. It didn't work. His hands fell down limply at his sides and he let his head fall to one side, eyes falling nearly half closed as a constant smarmy grin seemed tattooed on his face. "Marmots." He gave a giddy giggle.

Dib raised a brow at Zim's odd behavior. Of course, odd and Zim belonged in the same sentence, so in the end the way the other teen was acting didn't really bother him as much as it used to. He looked back at the crowd once more and was glad to see that most of the people had walked away. It gave them a clear shot of the exit which Dib was more than happy to take. He pulled his hand out of his pocket to reach out and take hold of Zim's own. "Come on. Since I don't have anymore coins, we might as well get going. Unless you'd rather hang around for no real reason."

"Falafel waffles." Zim answered in response and giggled again, complacently lead by the hand. He had no arguments; but with his mind having the consistency of liquid jello cubes, he didn't have any intelligent words to say either. The ancient human proverb was indeed true - video games _did_ rot your brain; and the heavy make out scene after buried it nice and deep. "Yay zombies!" Zim waved bye-bye at the first game they'd played as they left.


	17. READ FIRST

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